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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>2 1/2 Year Old Mom Says No Nap
sunny 07:16 AM 10-08-2009
I have a 2.5 year old and he is the only one is his class that doesn't nap. (mom prefers him not to nap so he can go to bed at 7 btw he leaves our care at 5). Problem is all the others are napping for 1.5 hours or more and he is bored and getting into trouble. We have tried books, puzzles, coloring (typical quiet time activities). Now he's bored and getting up off his mat walking around talking loud and telling the teacher NO NO NO. What can we do to keep him busy???
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laundryduchess@yahoo.com 09:44 AM 10-08-2009
my rules,.. EVERYONE in care naps, from 6 weeks to 6-10 yrs. my guess is, she will never know,.. may not need him in bed until 8 if he has one. I dont leave it as an option. If your here, you nap. period.
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AmandasFCC 09:51 AM 10-08-2009
I would explain to her that he is incredibly disruptive when he's not napping and much better behaved when he does. Maybe try a compromise, say you'll wake him after 45 mins or something. I've found that works with my parents who don't see that their kids need a nap.
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Liliya 10:09 AM 10-08-2009
It is low in my state ,children under 5 must take a rest.Just tell mom that state lady said...all kids under 5 should lay down for nap and if he falls asleep,you should let him sleep.
I do not understand parents who puts child to bed that early,when they spend time with him?
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jen 10:33 AM 10-08-2009
EVERYONE takes a nap!
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Former Teacher 04:26 PM 10-08-2009
Oh! I do remember those kind of parents! TX law requires ALL children regardless of age must be allowed to have a "rest period". They do not have to sleep but they are required to lie down. After 30 mins, if they are not already sleeping, then they must be allowed to do the quiet activities.

My take 1: Depending on the parent, (and child!) I may or may not have honored this request. I have had parents tell me not to put the child down because they would be picking the child up early (that NEVER happened!) I have also had parents tell me, like you, because they wanted them to go to bed early. Without sounding rude, but IMO, I was not going to make things convenient for THEM and let my day go to heck. If the child is tired, esp. at that age, I let them sleep.

My take 2: In all honesty, again depending on the child, if a child was awake, sometimes I would let them just lay there without the quiet activities. Sometimes with the quiet things it got worse because the child would get louder. Then you would have the whole room get up. The only time I would do the quiet thing at all would be if state was there.

My take 3: If I was in your situation, I would explain to the parent that all children are required to have a rest period. Show your Minimum Standards. Explain to her that if the state came for an inspection and saw her little one running around, out of control, etc you would be written up. Tell her that to make things better for all around, that you would wake the child up earlier then the other children so that should you be inspected, so and so would still be involved in the quiet things.

Good luck!
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AmandasFCC 05:26 PM 10-08-2009
I have a question about this. Now, I'm a new provider and also a new parent. I haven't been "around the block" so to speak. I have education, and babysitting experience, but clearly that's a lot different than being a parent for many years.

It seems to me that 7:30 is far too early for a kid to be going to bed, unless of course, they're tired and need to go to sleep. However I hear a lot from my parents of 4 year olds that they don't want their child napping because when 7:30 rolls around, little Johnny doesn't want to go to sleep. I'm sorry but my 15 month old doesn't even get her bath until 7:30. It seems crazy to me to expect a child to go to bed that early!!! Am I wrong with that?

I don't force naps in my daycare, but I do force quiet rest time, as a rest period is required by licensing. If a child falls asleep, I have a really hard time justifying waking him up. If he fell asleep, he clearly needs the sleep. And my compromise is that if they fall asleep, I wake them up after an hour of rest. In one case, the child is miserable when he wakes up and I feel bad about that, but dad knows that if he falls asleep, he gets an hour nap. It was agreed upon and that's that.
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Former Teacher 06:22 PM 10-08-2009
Originally Posted by AmandasFCC:
I have a question about this. Now, I'm a new provider and also a new parent. I haven't been "around the block" so to speak. I have education, and babysitting experience, but clearly that's a lot different than being a parent for many years.

It seems to me that 7:30 is far too early for a kid to be going to bed, unless of course, they're tired and need to go to sleep. However I hear a lot from my parents of 4 year olds that they don't want their child napping because when 7:30 rolls around, little Johnny doesn't want to go to sleep. I'm sorry but my 15 month old doesn't even get her bath until 7:30. It seems crazy to me to expect a child to go to bed that early!!! Am I wrong with that?

I don't force naps in my daycare, but I do force quiet rest time, as a rest period is required by licensing. If a child falls asleep, I have a really hard time justifying waking him up. If he fell asleep, he clearly needs the sleep. And my compromise is that if they fall asleep, I wake them up after an hour of rest. In one case, the child is miserable when he wakes up and I feel bad about that, but dad knows that if he falls asleep, he gets an hour nap. It was agreed upon and that's that.

Amanda, I agree with you. 7:30 is way to early. I am more for the reasoning that when is there quality time during the week with the child? Once years ago I had a baby (she was about a year and a half) and while the parents took care of her basic needs, I felt as her primary caregiver, she lacked the attention needs. Anyway, mom came in one morning and told me how wonderful the baby slept etc. She said she got home, put her to bed at 7:00 (yikes!!) woke her up at 9:00 to give her a bath and dinner and then put her back down to bed. She apparently slept the night. I was SO upset by this mainly because this baby stayed at the daycare until at least 6:15 p.m. Whether this was a nightly thing, I don't know. Then again on the flip side, this baby was sleeping her 1 nap at the center. So I don't know what the deal was haha. Like I said it just upset me because she really was a sweet and good baby.

Again I totally agree with you!!!
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Unregistered 07:06 PM 10-08-2009
Part of group care is taking a nap. If mom doesn't want her child taking a nap, then mom needs to hire a nanny or stay home with the child.
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Unregistered 07:38 PM 10-08-2009
Originally Posted by laundryduchess@yahoo.com:
my rules,.. EVERYONE in care naps, from 6 weeks to 6-10 yrs. my guess is, she will never know,.. may not need him in bed until 8 if he has one. I dont leave it as an option. If your here, you nap. period.
You make 6 to 10 yr olds nap?????
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tinytotzdaycare 09:12 PM 10-08-2009
If it's your daycare rule, then be firm! 7pm is not too early a bed time though depending on when the child arrives at dc, I have 2 little ones that age that arrive at 4am They need to be in bed by 7pm but they still get a nap!

I would however offer to meet her in the middle, say....rest time is quiet time and if he falls alseep I will be sure to only let him sleep an hour. That way you both get what you want....sort of!
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mac60 02:40 AM 10-09-2009
Napping at 2 1/2 yrs old here is not an option either. You will lay down and you will be quiet and not be disruptive, and 99% of the time, the child will fall asleep. Until you are in school all day here, you are required to lay down and be quiet. Once you reach full day school age, I put them at the kitchen table to do quiet activities, and if you become disruptive then, you will get a nice soft blanket to lounge on.

I gotta love those parents who always want to blame the child not sleeping or not falling asleep at night on a nap.

I currently have a 2 1/2 yr old who is an absolute handful. He is on time outs frequently throughout the day. Mid morning, if he is on time out, sometimes he will lay down on the floor and go to sleep. The poor kid can't even make it till nap time. I course I wake him up, as I want him to nap when the others nap. Mondays are usually the worst. Parents will come in and say that he hasn't had a nap all weekend, well on Monday, he is an absolute monster child. Tired as hell. Then they say, well we are lucky to get him in bed by 9:30, he won't go to bed. WHAT ???? The kid is 2 1/2, who is the BOSS??? Whatever happened to putting your young child to bed and they stay there?

I have a 4 yr old that mom says she won't go to sleep at night, then goes on to tell me how she got out of bed 3 times, was hungry, wanted to sit with mommy, so mommy lets her come to the couch and watch tv, and then needs a drink and then.......Parents need to be firm about naps and bedtime instead of blaming us providers on the whys their child is having issues.

And putting your child to bed at 7 is rediculous when you pick them up at 5. Why did you have a child anyways if you didn't want to be a parent. Some parents, gees, I will never understand. Good luck on this.
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seashell 04:47 AM 10-09-2009
I agree that the child is going to bed to early. Dont have kids if you don't want them around! I would put the child down for a nap and not mention it to mom. It seems purely selfish on her part. Our job as caregivers is doing what's best for the kids in our care. If he's tired, let him sleep!
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laundryduchess@yahoo.com 08:33 AM 10-09-2009
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
You make 6 to 10 yr olds nap?????
yep, in the summer when my kids are out of school, they nap. By naptime they are exhausted. They dont nap as long as the little ones, but they do nap. Our schedule is so full during the summer that they need a break in the day,.. to be honest, my teens still do it sometimes. In our house it is very quiet and dark at naptime, you can either nap or read. We only have one computer so that is a limited activity. We dont playoutside at nap because I dont like the doors slamming at nap. Our day starts between 4 and 5 am,... by 5:15 am everyone is up, lights on, its a busy house. So by noon they are ready. Through school they have a early bedtime but in the summer they are up until 11-12. Since I work 13-15 hours a day we have family time in the evenings. Its nothing for us to be out swimming at 10 pm. Ive done it since my kids were born and it works for us. The sleep in the day helps keep them happy. If clients dont agree with my schedule they dont enroll.
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AmandasFCC 12:04 PM 10-09-2009
Originally Posted by tinytotzdaycare:
If it's your daycare rule, then be firm! 7pm is not too early a bed time though depending on when the child arrives at dc, I have 2 little ones that age that arrive at 4am They need to be in bed by 7pm but they still get a nap!

I would however offer to meet her in the middle, say....rest time is quiet time and if he falls alseep I will be sure to only let him sleep an hour. That way you both get what you want....sort of!
Well, yeah ok if the kids are getting up at 3-4 am of course they're going to bed at 7. But I mean in situations where the parents drop the child off between 8-9am and know that their child takes a nap at daycare. It seems a little silly to me to expect a 4 year old who took a nap to go to bed at 7.
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mrs.meg 05:08 AM 10-10-2009
OMG, that would get on my nerves, I would lose my mind if I didn't get an hour of peace!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I would have to tell her he either naps or she can find another daycare!
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Chickenhauler 11:42 PM 10-10-2009
It's a bit presumptious to say that 730 bed time is too early without knowing what time the child is woken up in the morning.

Some people's days start EARLY-I worked construction for a while, and I had to be on the jobsite at 6 am, which meant rise and stumble around in the dark at 4 am (no shine that early).

Now, if the kid is sleeping until 8 or 9, that's way too long, there should be a nap in there somewhere (or at least, I'd like to get a nap in mid-day).

At 2-1/2, my son, if he took a mid-day nap, would be up and roaring well past midnight, and up and going again at 6 am. I was the same way.

Every kid is different in their sleep requirements.
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tinytotzdaycare 09:52 AM 10-11-2009
Originally Posted by AmandasFCC:
Well, yeah ok if the kids are getting up at 3-4 am of course they're going to bed at 7. But I mean in situations where the parents drop the child off between 8-9am and know that their child takes a nap at daycare. It seems a little silly to me to expect a 4 year old who took a nap to go to bed at 7.


I agree with you on that, 8pm would be more appropriate if he isnt getting up too early.
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tinytotzdaycare 09:53 AM 10-11-2009
Originally Posted by Chickenhauler:
It's a bit presumptious to say that 730 bed time is too early without knowing what time the child is woken up in the morning.

Some people's days start EARLY-I worked construction for a while, and I had to be on the jobsite at 6 am, which meant rise and stumble around in the dark at 4 am (no shine that early).

Now, if the kid is sleeping until 8 or 9, that's way too long, there should be a nap in there somewhere (or at least, I'd like to get a nap in mid-day).

At 2-1/2, my son, if he took a mid-day nap, would be up and roaring well past midnight, and up and going again at 6 am. I was the same way.

Every kid is different in their sleep requirements.





Thats what I was saying as well in my above post....some of my kiddos arrive at 4am and dont go back to sleep..they need to be in bed by 7. Guess it just depends on the situation.
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judytrickett 10:47 AM 10-13-2009
Well, IMO, a 2.5 yr old NEEDS to nap. It's too long a day for a child that age to be up all day long. AND, it means YOU get no break all day either. Sorry, but I think you would be hard pressed to find one dcparent who would be willing to work 10 hours without a break so why should you be expected to??

My daycare mantra regarding naps is this - IF YOUR CHILD HAS OUTGROWN THEIR NAP THEY HAVE OUTGROWN MY DAYCARE.

And I mean it. Kids nap here or they leave care - period.
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judytrickett 10:48 AM 10-13-2009
Originally Posted by laundryduchess@yahoo.com:
yep, in the summer when my kids are out of school, they nap. By naptime they are exhausted. They dont nap as long as the little ones, but they do nap. Our schedule is so full during the summer that they need a break in the day,.. to be honest, my teens still do it sometimes. In our house it is very quiet and dark at naptime, you can either nap or read. We only have one computer so that is a limited activity. We dont playoutside at nap because I dont like the doors slamming at nap. Our day starts between 4 and 5 am,... by 5:15 am everyone is up, lights on, its a busy house. So by noon they are ready. Through school they have a early bedtime but in the summer they are up until 11-12. Since I work 13-15 hours a day we have family time in the evenings. Its nothing for us to be out swimming at 10 pm. Ive done it since my kids were born and it works for us. The sleep in the day helps keep them happy. If clients dont agree with my schedule they dont enroll.

ITA Laundyduchess!!!!

My OWN kids are 6 yrs and 9 yrs old and we homeschool so they are here all day. They nap too in the afternoon. Most kids are overtired and sleep deprived, IMO.
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SimpleMom 08:27 AM 10-14-2009
Just a thought...My children have never been great at going to bed before 11pm if they have a nap after age 2yrs. We've tried everything. So I can understand. Without a nap my children will sleep around 7 or 8 and sleep all night. It's easier than having to wake them early after getting to bed so late. There are some daycares that don't require a nap for some and that might be a better fit for the family.

I do require a rest time at my facility. If they are not sleepy after 30 minutes I let them do quiet activities at the table or at their cot. If they get too busy or really loud then it's back to rest time. It's tough for every one when kids won't rest at daycare. One center I had my oldest in had a nap room and an older pre-k room that didn't nap and gave parents the choice. I loved it.
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sunny 10:31 AM 10-14-2009
Our state requires that all the children nap or have quiet time. However he doesn't stay quiet which is the problem.
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momof3 09:00 AM 10-15-2009
I think the parents are so used to doing their own thing that sometimes they like to blame the dcp. In my opinion, all 2 1/2 year olds need a nap. It helps refresh them for the rest of the day. If the parents were just consistant and put him to bed at 8:00, it would become routine and he would be happier. Kids actually sleep better at night if they have had a nap during the day. There have been times, when a daycare child didn't take a good nap at my house and 99% of the time, the next morning the parents tell me they were up in the middle of the night.
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Chickenhauler 11:44 PM 10-17-2009
Originally Posted by judytrickett:
Well, IMO, a 2.5 yr old NEEDS to nap. It's too long a day for a child that age to be up all day long. AND, it means YOU get no break all day either. Sorry, but I think you would be hard pressed to find one dcparent who would be willing to work 10 hours without a break so why should you be expected to??

My daycare mantra regarding naps is this - IF YOUR CHILD HAS OUTGROWN THEIR NAP THEY HAVE OUTGROWN MY DAYCARE.

And I mean it. Kids nap here or they leave care - period.
So you throw school age children out of your care?

How do you get a child that goes to school all day to take a nap on a non-school day?
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mac60 06:54 AM 10-18-2009
I know some providers who do not care for children once they get into the school system.
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Chickenhauler 01:18 PM 10-18-2009
Originally Posted by mac60:
I know some providers who do not care for children once they get into the school system.
I know some like that too, and they end up losing the rest of the family, or have people who won't enroll their young kids because of this.

Think about it.......you got a family with 3 kids (not all that common these days) but once the oldest starts school, the entire family goes to a new daycare center.........now you have 3 slots to fill.
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judytrickett 09:47 AM 10-19-2009
Originally Posted by Chickenhauler:
So you throw school age children out of your care?

How do you get a child that goes to school all day to take a nap on a non-school day?

I don't take school-aged children into care. And yes, when the kids become school-aged they move on unless thier parents want to pay for FULL day care and NOT before and after school care. As of yet, I have not had a parent willing to pay $35 for full day care when their school aged child attends only an hour in the morning and an hour after school.

So, the short answer is YES - EVERYONE has a nap here.
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Unregistered 01:58 PM 10-19-2009
Originally Posted by judytrickett:
I don't take school-aged children into care. And yes, when the kids become school-aged they move on unless thier parents want to pay for FULL day care and NOT before and after school care. As of yet, I have not had a parent willing to pay $35 for full day care when their school aged child attends only an hour in the morning and an hour after school.

So, the short answer is YES - EVERYONE has a nap here.
Just wanna' say, I LOVE me some Judy Trickett!!! Such a fan!!!! You guys should read her blog it's fantastic!!!
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Unregistered 10:53 AM 10-29-2009
Here at my own daycare- everyone has a quiettime. I have the older ones in Kindergarten+ in another room, having quiet time. They sit and watch movies or read The other ones all nap from 1-3. I need a little break all day long!!!!
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