Default Style Register
Daycare.com Forum
Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Child Behavior
bookbabe32186 05:42 PM 01-25-2011
I have a little boy in my daycare who is developmentally delayed. He is actually 5 years old, but his social development is really only at that of a 2- 2 1/2 year old. He has been becoming increasingly violent with myself and my co-provider, as well as with the other children. I can handle him being aggresive and violent with myself, but his behavior has been rubbing off on my two year old daycare child. The actual two year old has been kicking and hitting and biting and the only child who shows this behavior is the five year old. The five year old is also aggressive and very mean to the two year old, since they are both at the same stage of learning to play and share. Today, the five year old covered the little guy's mouth, put his arm around his neck and pushed him against the wall. I have tried time outs and taking things away from both of them, but nothing has helped. The two year old's parents are starting to become concerned with his behavior and they have mentioned possibly having to remove him from my daycare. I don't want to have to lose either of these little boys, but I'm really at a loss as to what to do now. If anyone has any suggestions or advice, I would greatly appreciate it!
Reply
marniewon 07:20 PM 01-25-2011
Have you talked to the parents of the 5 year old? If so, what do they do at home? What do they suggest to do with him since time outs don't work?

Unfortunately, you may have to term the 5 year old. He is really demonstrating a lot of 2 year old behavior, but since he is (I'm assuming) bigger than the rest of the kids, he could really do some damage. I don't blame the parents of the 2 year old - I would be concerned also. If he is picking on the 2 year old, who's to say he won't start picking on other children too? And if that's the case, you will have little ones dropping like flies, while you keep this one 5 year old.
Reply
SilverSabre25 08:45 PM 01-25-2011
By 'developmentally delayed' and the description you gave, I have to ask--is he one the autism spectrum? If so, he should be getting therapy and you should ask his parents to ensure that you receive the same training they are in therapy techniques.

Separating him from the other child might help, or at least NEVER leaving them alone together.

If his behavior makes it hard for him to be in an inclusive setting, then the parents really are going to have to look into a different care situation--one where the providers are all trained to deal with the specific issues and delays. It sounds like at the very least he may need to be in a setting where he's not the oldest and the strongest.
Reply
AnythingsPossible 04:32 AM 01-26-2011
I have DCB who is almost 4 going on 2/2.5 his is mostly vocal and a bit social. He has no concept of personal space. Unlike your guy, he isn't aggressive, but my other DCK's still have issues with him because he is constantly in their faces. He wants to play with them, but completly invades when he does. When he gets to be to much, I have to move him away from whatever activity. If he continues to go back to the person, I have him sit at the table for awhile with an activity. He also spends a very large portion of his day shadowing me. He does go to the local child development center for therapy, are the parents doing anything like that for your DCB? I too worry about losing families because of him, because there are some kids here who really don't like him and dread when he is here. If things don't improve I will term him because he is just one of my group. While you don't want to lose him, you have to look at what is good for your group and your business. Right or not, if you do lose people it might be said that you have unruly kids in your care, and you don't want things like that to start being said.
If you really want to keep him, you are going to have to be very vigilant and possibly not leave him alone with other children, if you have to attend to something else, he may have to be your helper and follow you throughout the day. A 5 year old could seriously hurt a 2 year old. In my situation the table time activities have worked and so has shadowing.
Reply
Tags:autism, developmentally delayed, slow child
Reply Up