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Old 08-04-2011, 12:01 PM
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Default Mealtime Meltdown...Did I Do The Right Thing?

If you had a 2.9yo dck throwing a fit over lunch, dumping things on the floor, etc...would you just put them to bed? Long story short, new dcg had a huge fit over what we were having for lunch and proceeded to make the biggest mess on purpose. This after throwing a fit and screaming at me about using the bathroom, which ended in a huge mess in her pants 10 mins later. I'm just second guessing myself. She screamed for 5 mins more before falling asleep an hour earlier than normal. And is still asleep, about 30 mins longer than normal. She's never been in care before, been home with daddy, and mom tells me that over the weekend she was acting similarly at home. I just don't want her to be miserable here. But I also can't allow her to run the show. I don't think she's ever encountered so much redirection before, iykwim?
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Old 08-04-2011, 12:08 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MG&Lsmom View Post
If you had a 2.9yo dck throwing a fit over lunch, dumping things on the floor, etc...would you just put them to bed? Long story short, new dcg had a huge fit over what we were having for lunch and proceeded to make the biggest mess on purpose. This after throwing a fit and screaming at me about using the bathroom, which ended in a huge mess in her pants 10 mins later. I'm just second guessing myself. She screamed for 5 mins more before falling asleep an hour earlier than normal. And is still asleep, about 30 mins longer than normal. She's never been in care before, been home with daddy, and mom tells me that over the weekend she was acting similarly at home. I just don't want her to be miserable here. But I also can't allow her to run the show. I don't think she's ever encountered so much redirection before, iykwim?
Nip that in the bud now! I had a toddler throwing food when angry, it progressed the next week to be funny, then he startes spitting it across the table and onto family members plates! ( during OUR family dinner ) So now if they throw food once they are warned I will take their plate and they will be done. 2nd time I pick it all up and it's gone. I learned my lesson with that! I think u did the right thing. I too want to be as kind as possible to newcomers but they must get the rules down immediatley or there will be trouble.
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Old 08-04-2011, 01:37 PM
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She's not miserable necessarily, this is just part of growing up and encountering a person that does not play games at mealtime. The fact that is was so over the top probably means that while she does this at home (per the parents admission), they dont do anything about it. Shes not used to a no and fighting the no's from you is exhausting (or perhaps she never napped regularly at home). you aren't doing anything wrong. just stick to the rules. letting behavior slide because she is new to daycare is just going to drag on the adjustment period even longer.
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Old 08-04-2011, 01:42 PM
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I wouldn't feel bad, I would probably would have done the same thing. Sometimes with my son when he doesn't get what he wants and throws his food or cup, I will take it and put it out of reach where he can see it. He HAS to stay in his chair until everyone is done with dinner/lunch and most of the time he will change his mind. I just tell him that is what he is getting, if he doesn't want it, it's find, but he can have it when he is ready to drink/eat.
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Old 08-04-2011, 02:55 PM
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you did the right thing, nip it in the butt now other wise its going to be a long road for you.
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Old 08-04-2011, 03:51 PM
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Not only did you do the right thing, but I'd sit near the kid, and if one item of food was thrown, the next meal would be over. Don't let it continue.
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Old 08-04-2011, 05:11 PM
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Thanks everyone. Dad was the one to pick up today and he was very upset that she was throwing food. He's been taking care of her full time and just returned to work after 2 years out. He said he thinks he was too lenient with her and had a hard time transitioning from taking care of a baby to taking care of a child that needed direction. I don't think she's heard too much no in her short life. And yes, she does not regularly nap at home, but is now getting up 2 hours earlier than normal and playing harder than she ever has before. I think the parents are on board tho because this past weekend they had a real hard time with super tired cranky girl. I'm thinking this weekend will be worse.
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