Default Style Register
Daycare.com Forum
Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>I Think It’s Time to Term
lovemydaycare0912 07:47 AM 03-16-2016
You know the family I have that complains about everything. Same family we spoke with about that breakfast is over at 830 but "forgot" that if he comes after he won't get fed. Now claiming I am withholding meals and just being rude over texts. Dad xomes to give child food in car but is fake and its not my fault they dont communicate effectively.

I think its time to say goodbye give 2 week notice and hope they pay so i dont have to take to court. I already called licensing and gave heads up. Im just over it. Im really emotional like angry right now so i am trying to calm down before I make a decision.

He is a private payer but i dont think I should continue for the sake of money. We will be alright.

Advice plz
Reply
Ariana 07:59 AM 03-16-2016
Anyone claiming I am being rude for enforcing rules or accusing me of "withholding meals" from children when I am not is immediately terminated.

Did they pay a deposit?
Reply
MunchkinWrangler 08:07 AM 03-16-2016
I just don't think it is your responsibility to make sure a child gets breakfast. If we served food on a whim, that is all you would be doing and nothing else. I know you have laid out the rule to them. Can you write up a statement, specifically for them, have them sign it that breakfast is started at a certain time and include the time the child needs to be there to be served otherwise they must make sure to feed their child. To be honest, it is technically neglect on their part for not having ample time in the morning to get breakfast for their OWN kid and to make sure he/she (I missed gender) is there for breakfast before it is not being served. They need to get their act together. Period. I would say in no less words that it is their responsibility as a parent to make sure their kid is fed or is on time to have breakfast. At this point if they're offended, screw 'em. I wouldn't even worry about sounding rude either. I would even bring up neglect, ON THEIR PART because their actions are preventing their child from having breakfast in the first place.
Reply
Thriftylady 08:17 AM 03-16-2016
I agree, we set meal times for a reason. Without them our days would be chaos, not to mention if one kid eats they all want to. I also agree put it back on the parents, the parents are withholding food, they know the rules and are bringing kiddos without being fed. I might be inclined to term also. And if they were accusing me of withholding food, it would be immediate with no refunds.
Reply
Snowmom 08:31 AM 03-16-2016
Originally Posted by lovemydaycare0912:
You know the family I have that complains about everything. Same family we spoke with about that breakfast is over at 830 but "forgot" that if he comes after he won't get fed. Now claiming I am withholding meals and just being rude over texts. Dad xomes to give child food in car but is fake and its not my fault they dont communicate effectively.

I think its time to say goodbye give 2 week notice and hope they pay so i dont have to take to court. I already called licensing and gave heads up. Im just over it. Im really emotional like angry right now so i am trying to calm down before I make a decision.

He is a private payer but i dont think I should continue for the sake of money. We will be alright.

Advice plz
So sorry . It's frustrating when parents pass of their parental responsibility as our problem.

It sounds as if you've just had enough and I don't blame you. Throwing out accusations like "withholding food" can be pretty damaging.

Are you looking for advice on how to word a term to the parents?
Reply
lovemydaycare0912 09:05 AM 03-16-2016
Originally Posted by Ariana:
Anyone claiming I am being rude for enforcing rules or accusing me of "withholding meals" from children when I am not is immediately terminated.

Did they pay a deposit?
No unfortunately not. They were with me since i first opened and I didnt require it then. I will probably have to go to court on them
Reply
lovemydaycare0912 09:07 AM 03-16-2016
Originally Posted by MunchkinWrangler:
I just don't think it is your responsibility to make sure a child gets breakfast. If we served food on a whim, that is all you would be doing and nothing else. I know you have laid out the rule to them. Can you write up a statement, specifically for them, have them sign it that breakfast is started at a certain time and include the time the child needs to be there to be served otherwise they must make sure to feed their child. To be honest, it is technically neglect on their part for not having ample time in the morning to get breakfast for their OWN kid and to make sure he/she (I missed gender) is there for breakfast before it is not being served. They need to get their act together. Period. I would say in no less words that it is their responsibility as a parent to make sure their kid is fed or is on time to have breakfast. At this point if they're offended, screw 'em. I wouldn't even worry about sounding rude either. I would even bring up neglect, ON THEIR PART because their actions are preventing their child from having breakfast in the first place.
That is a good idea but i dont know if i care to deal with them anymore.
Reply
lovemydaycare0912 09:09 AM 03-16-2016
Originally Posted by Snowmom:
So sorry . It's frustrating when parents pass of their parental responsibility as our problem.

It sounds as if you've just had enough and I don't blame you. Throwing out accusations like "withholding food" can be pretty damaging.

Are you looking for advice on how to word a term to the parents?
I guess so. Im getting kids down for nap now. Going to eat lunch then relax so I can figure out what i want to do. If I decide to term, I will post a copy of it here
Reply
lovemydaycare0912 09:11 AM 03-16-2016
Forgot to mention my husband and I are on different terms. We run the daycare together as our only spurce of income. We have 6 kids, fully enrolled now but this dcb is a orivate payer. If we lose him, we would only have 2 private payers and 3 state subsidy. I just feel like where do you draw the line? Im a woman so I get upset and can't let go of it quick. I loveeeeee dcb but I don't think it's right.
Reply
childcaremom 09:17 AM 03-16-2016
So your dh would like to keep them as clients? I would sort that out first and then that would determine the course of action. I would also let my dh do all the dealings with them, too. I'd be done.

I would not want to deal with dcps who accused me of that, either. I would put that right back on them, as pp suggested.

When I term immediately, I do not require 2 weeks payment. I just am done. I have even refunded money just to get rid of horrible dcps even though it is in my contract that I don't have to.

If money is the issue, then I would be interviewing and replacing, asap.
Reply
lovemydaycare0912 09:29 AM 03-16-2016
Originally Posted by childcaremom:
So your dh would like to keep them as clients? I would sort that out first and then that would determine the course of action. I would also let my dh do all the dealings with them, too. I'd be done.

I would not want to deal with dcps who accused me of that, either. I would put that right back on them, as pp suggested.

When I term immediately, I do not require 2 weeks payment. I just am done. I have even refunded money just to get rid of horrible dcps even though it is in my contract that I don't have to.

If money is the issue, then I would be interviewing and replacing, asap.
Yes so we wouldn't have to rely on the state to pay rent because sometimes our payment from the State takes a little while. I would give 2 weeks if terming and definitely start interviewing. Ill keep yous updated
Reply
childcaremom 09:31 AM 03-16-2016
Originally Posted by lovemydaycare0912:
Yes so we wouldn't have to rely on the state to pay rent because sometimes our payment from the State takes a little while. I would give 2 weeks if terming and definitely start interviewing. Ill keep yous updated


Good luck with whatever you decide.
Reply
Blackcat31 09:46 AM 03-16-2016
Dear DCP

Please note, accusing me of not following my program policies (providing X with meals and/or snacks) is not something I take lightly and strive to make sure ALL the policies in my parent handbook are followed for not only the best interest of the child and family but in an effort to meet the needs of all children enrolled in ABC Daycare.

At this time, I want to point out that ALL children present between the hours of 7am-8am are served a healthy, nutritious breakfast. As stated in my parent handbook (section 4, paragraph 2, under MEALS & SNACKS) ABC Daycare's policy is that ANY child dropped off after 8am needs to have been fed PRIOR to drop off.

Attached is a copy of the sign in/out sheet clearly showing the times each day that X was dropped off.

I have consulted with my licensor and am confident that I am conducting my program as required according to state regulations and in accordance with the written Parent Policy Handbook.

Should you have any further issues you would like to discuss, please contact me via e-mail so that we can set aside a time to speak privately.

Moving forward, should further accusations be made about my program and the policies in the parent handbook, services will be terminated immediately and any monies paid will be forfeited.

Thank you

~Provider


Or you can just go with the "terminated immediately" route. Which is the route I probably would have gone with. I don't take kindly to being accused of starving a child.

I would NOT agree to continue services to a family that makes an accusation in regards to my program when they know it is 100% false. That's playing dirty in my opinion and I wouldn't be willing to continue allowing them in my home so that additional accusation can be created/made up.
Reply
lovemydaycare0912 10:02 AM 03-16-2016
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
Dear DCP

Please note, accusing me of not following my program policies (providing X with meals and/or snacks) is not something I take lightly and strive to make sure ALL the policies in my parent handbook are followed for not only the best interest of the child and family but in an effort to meet the needs of all children enrolled in ABC Daycare.

At this time, I want to point out that ALL children present between the hours of 7am-8am are served a healthy, nutritious breakfast. As stated in my parent handbook (section 4, paragraph 2, under MEALS & SNACKS) ABC Daycare's policy is that ANY child dropped off after 8am needs to have been fed PRIOR to drop off.

Attached is a copy of the sign in/out sheet clearly showing the times each day that X was dropped off.

I have consulted with my licensor and am confident that I am conducting my program as required according to state regulations and in accordance with the written Parent Policy Handbook.

Should you have any further issues you would like to discuss, please contact me via e-mail so that we can set aside a time to speak privately.

Moving forward, should further accusations be made about my program and the policies in the parent handbook, services will be terminated immediately and any monies paid will be forfeited.

Thank you

~Provider


Or you can just go with the "terminated immediately" route. Which is the route I probably would have gone with. I don't take kindly to being accused of starving a child.

I would NOT agree to continue services to a family that makes an accusation in regards to my program when they know it is 100% false. That's playing dirty in my opinion and I wouldn't be willing to continue allowing them in my home so that additional accusation can be created/made up.
I like your letter but am with you on the last part. Because I feel that everytime I change something, they are going to have a t*tty attack. I can't with the false accusations. Well I have until 6pm to figure out. Let me clear my head, and see.

I just know if I keep them, tonight's conversation will not go well.
Reply
MunchkinWrangler 10:07 AM 03-16-2016
Originally Posted by lovemydaycare0912:
That is a good idea but i dont know if i care to deal with them anymore.
There's your answer. Make sure you and your husband talk and come to an agreement before moving forward. I wouldn't take kindly to this at all and would be just as steamed, especially because they're not making changes.
Reply
lovemydaycare0912 10:24 AM 03-16-2016
Originally Posted by MunchkinWrangler:
There's your answer. Make sure you and your husband talk and come to an agreement before moving forward. I wouldn't take kindly to this at all and would be just as steamed, especially because they're not making changes.
Talking with him now but just realized he wont be here for pickup because he has to go pick his son up. So now Im having anxiety because either way i do it I know it's going to leave me stressed. I just prefer to have my husband there during a tough convo.
Reply
MunchkinWrangler 10:39 AM 03-16-2016
Originally Posted by lovemydaycare0912:
Talking with him now but just realized he wont be here for pickup because he has to go pick his son up. So now Im having anxiety because either way i do it I know it's going to leave me stressed. I just prefer to have my husband there during a tough convo.
No harm in waiting to have him there for support and it would be appropriate since you are both in business together. Until then, document, document, document. Good luck!
Reply
lovemydaycare0912 11:44 AM 03-16-2016
What do you all think of this if I decide to keep them?

First I will simply state to mom there will be no back and forth discussion. She knows the rules, we went over them several times and I am unsure of why she thought they did not apply to her. However, going forward this notice needs to be signed in order to continue care. Copy of notice below......

This notice must be read, understood, signed, and agree to abide by in order to continue in our program here at ABC Daycare. Failure to sign this notice by Friday, March 18, 2016 will result in a termination notice to go in effect. Care will then end on Friday April 1, 2016.


I, __________________________________ agree to and understand the meal policy. I understand ABC Daycare serves breakfast beginning at 7:30 a.m. and ending at 8:30 a.m. If my child, Billy Bob Joe is dropped off after 8:30a.m. it is my responsibility to have breakfast served at home. There will be no exception this rule.


____________________________________
(Parent Signature)

____________________________________
(Print Name)

____________________________________
(Provider Signature)

*A copy of this letter will be e-mailed and given to you in the form of hard copy for your records.
Reply
childcaremom 12:10 PM 03-16-2016
If a child arrives at 8:25, are you able to accomodate breakfast?

I don't offer to feed them breakfast but if breakfast was to start at 7:30, then I would want children to be in attendance by 7:15. Or, I would want them to be here by 8 so that the child had time to finish eating by 8:30. I have no idea what your procedure is, though, so if it works for you, perfect.

I would maybe take out the "sign or you will be terminated" part and just tell them that it needs to be read/signed/returned on their next day of care. If they don't want to sign, then you know you will be terming on Friday, kwim? This is your policy that they have already agreed to, this is just a "the end, this is it" kind of thing.
Reply
lovemydaycare0912 12:12 PM 03-16-2016
Originally Posted by childcaremom:
If a child arrives at 8:25, are you able to accomodate breakfast?

I don't offer to feed them breakfast but if breakfast was to start at 7:30, then I would want children to be in attendance by 7:15. Or, I would want them to be here by 8 so that the child had time to finish eating by 8:30. I have no idea what your procedure is, though, so if it works for you, perfect.

I would maybe take out the "sign or you will be terminated" part and just tell them that it needs to be read/signed/returned on their next day of care. If they don't want to sign, then you know you will be terming on Friday, kwim? This is your policy that they have already agreed to, this is just a "the end, this is it" kind of thing.
Yes if they get here by 8:25 we still feed. It works for us right now. And I agree, I'll take that part out and then at 6pm pickup hand them the term letter if it gets to that.
Reply
thrivingchildcarecom 12:17 PM 03-16-2016
You are so wise. I usually try to take a moment and processes things. So do that. But remember, you know when its time to go. To be honest, we usually wait much longer than we should to make that decision. I have found out (the hard way at times) that the money is so not worth it. Peace of mind is better!
Reply
lovemydaycare0912 12:20 PM 03-16-2016
Originally Posted by thrivingchildcarecom:
You are so wise. I usually try to take a moment and processes things. So do that. But remember, you know when its time to go. To be honest, we usually wait much longer than we should to make that decision. I have found out (the hard way at times) that the money is so not worth it. Peace of mind is better!
Thank you. I told my husband this is strike two. Strike 3 of me feeling like this, and they are out. BUT this was only after I was able to sit down and process everything. I listened to my gospel, booked my long weekend vacation, and feel a little better. Now, I will be by myself at pickup, but I am going to run the conversation. I will tell her I will not go back and forth. What was said was said, here is the notice both her and her husband need to sign. 830am is the cutoff time. Thats it, have a good night.
Reply
Unregistered 12:23 PM 03-16-2016
So is this something new they are signing, or something they have already signed and agreed to before?
Reply
lovemydaycare0912 12:50 PM 03-16-2016
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
So is this something new they are signing, or something they have already signed and agreed to before?
This is new or different form I should say but the policy has always been the same. I have signed contracts and letters sent out that state the policy. However due to todys incident, I am going to need another signed policy form.
Reply
Thriftylady 01:46 PM 03-16-2016
Let us know how it goes!
Reply
EntropyControlSpecialist 03:53 PM 03-16-2016
I hope it is received well and they ask for forgiveness for saying such a rude thing.
Reply
lovemydaycare0912 06:58 PM 03-16-2016
So dh made it home in time to be there when dcm and dcd came up to talk. We discussed what the problem is and how we can fix it. She said she loves us and doesn't want to take him out because he does so great here blah blah. I I just listened all nice and calm said what I had to say. And told her I will need a paper signed. However, I am going to begin looking for new children. Their son is my last child and sometimes I am with only him for an hour or more. So when I find my new kid I will simply say it is due to hours and age change to keep it simple. Which is not a lie. My husband said he was proud of me for having a backbone today but yet remaining calm and professional.

I TRULY TRULY thank you guys for always being here for me. As a young and still new provider, you guys help me out A LOT. I often think, well how would my Daycare Partners treat this situation lol Y'all are a blessing
Reply
Meeko 07:21 PM 03-16-2016
Originally Posted by MunchkinWrangler:
I just don't think it is your responsibility to make sure a child gets breakfast. If we served food on a whim, that is all you would be doing and nothing else. I know you have laid out the rule to them. Can you write up a statement, specifically for them, have them sign it that breakfast is started at a certain time and include the time the child needs to be there to be served otherwise they must make sure to feed their child. To be honest, it is technically neglect on their part for not having ample time in the morning to get breakfast for their OWN kid and to make sure he/she (I missed gender) is there for breakfast before it is not being served. They need to get their act together. Period. I would say in no less words that it is their responsibility as a parent to make sure their kid is fed or is on time to have breakfast. At this point if they're offended, screw 'em. I wouldn't even worry about sounding rude either. I would even bring up neglect, ON THEIR PART because their actions are preventing their child from having breakfast in the first place.

Reply
Ariana 12:16 AM 03-17-2016
Originally Posted by lovemydaycare0912:
So dh made it home in time to be there when dcm and dcd came up to talk. We discussed what the problem is and how we can fix it. She said she loves us and doesn't want to take him out because he does so great here blah blah. I I just listened all nice and calm said what I had to say. And told her I will need a paper signed. However, I am going to begin looking for new children. Their son is my last child and sometimes I am with only him for an hour or more. So when I find my new kid I will simply say it is due to hours and age change to keep it simple. Which is not a lie. My husband said he was proud of me for having a backbone today but yet remaining calm and professional.

I TRULY TRULY thank you guys for always being here for me. As a young and still new provider, you guys help me out A LOT. I often think, well how would my Daycare Partners treat this situation lol Y'all are a blessing
. Good for you!
Reply
lovemydaycare0912 08:31 PM 03-18-2016
Update. I am looking for someone to replace as I think she may start looking for a nanny or other replacement soon also. But I am terming because I know this isn't a good fit. She does not like authority or the thought of signing anything contract, letter, etc because she know it will bite her in the butt when she doesn't act accordingly. Which is fine. I just know I will need major help as to how to write this letter when the time comes.
Reply
Tags:rude parents, terminate, termination letter
Reply Up