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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Has a Parent Ever Said This to You?
DaycareDarling 06:31 PM 01-07-2020
So today dcb was sent in with no socks. Right now I am pretty loosy goosy with rules because they won't be in my dc much longer. So I actually didn't say anything I just found some spares. However dcm texted me and this is how the convo went:

"I forgot to tell you Erics's socks are in his pocket of his jacket. He is in a phase were he only wants pajamas on and no socks"

"Lol! I found some spares so he's mismatched today, just let him know in the morning he has to wear socks to ms Cole's lol!"

..and she responds with..

"Okay - I'll try.
Getting 3 kids out the door in the morning is no easy feat"

I know this is not a big deal- but wow. I expected "will do". You'll try??

But the real meat of this thread is the "it's not easy getting 3 kids out the door". Have you ever had a parent say something along those lines? Does she realize who she's saying that to?? As if I don't take care of those same 3 children plus 3 more for ten hours a day mon-fri lol. That's like if I took all my dck outside in the cold but left dcb coat and just throwing up my hands and saying "welp it's tough getting 6 kids out the door". Like???

Also it's her own fault. She has no control over her children. They have no organization or schedule at home and it shows. They don't bathe everyday have no healthy bedtime ritual and I have no sympathy for a mom who complains about how hard it is to be a parent when they don't even do what they should. What is so hard? Not cooking? Not bathing them? Not brushing out thier hair? Not putting your foot down when it's time to go to dc ?? Tell me what is so hard about parenting when you do it the way you're doing it? lol!

In all fairness she may not have said this out of feeling entitled. She may truly just be overwhelmed. However I feel like if that was the case she would have said sorry I'll make sure he has socks.

This is my first time ever posting on any sort of forum so I'm sorry if I did something wrong :/
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Annalee 07:34 PM 01-07-2020
Originally Posted by DaycareDarling:
So today dcb was sent in with no socks. Right now I am pretty loosy goosy with rules because they won't be in my dc much longer. So I actually didn't say anything I just found some spares. However dcm texted me and this is how the convo went:

"I forgot to tell you Erics's socks are in his pocket of his jacket. He is in a phase were he only wants pajamas on and no socks"

"Lol! I found some spares so he's mismatched today, just let him know in the morning he has to wear socks to ms Cole's lol!"

..and she responds with..

"Okay - I'll try.
Getting 3 kids out the door in the morning is no easy feat"

I know this is not a big deal- but wow. I expected "will do". You'll try??

But the real meat of this thread is the "it's not easy getting 3 kids out the door". Have you ever had a parent say something along those lines? Does she realize who she's saying that to?? As if I don't take care of those same 3 children plus 3 more for ten hours a day mon-fri lol. That's like if I took all my dck outside in the cold but left dcb coat and just throwing up my hands and saying "welp it's tough getting 6 kids out the door". Like???

Also it's her own fault. She has no control over her children. They have no organization or schedule at home and it shows. They don't bathe everyday have no healthy bedtime ritual and I have no sympathy for a mom who complains about how hard it is to be a parent when they don't even do what they should. What is so hard? Not cooking? Not bathing them? Not brushing out thier hair? Not putting your foot down when it's time to go to dc ?? Tell me what is so hard about parenting when you do it the way you're doing it? lol!

In all fairness she may not have said this out of feeling entitled. She may truly just be overwhelmed. However I feel like if that was the case she would have said sorry I'll make sure he has socks.

This is my first time ever posting on any sort of forum so I'm sorry if I did something wrong :/
I understand! It’s a culture of no-responsibility and an entitlement expecting others to always agree with them. It’s a me generation with no regard of how their actions affect others. I’m finding now, more than ever , you have to “tell” in no uncertain terms what your expectations are. Otherwise, It drains the life out of you.
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Josiegirl 03:04 AM 01-08-2020
Lol as was said in the tags, 'parents are clueless' as to what providers do each day. I'm sure she is overwhelmed getting 3 kids out the door every morning but double that, for you, every time you expect dcks to do something. I don't think she sees that picture in her head though.
Side note, I always had extra socks on hand for cases like this. Lol Some things I used to let slide just because they're so little(none of us is perfect, right?) but if he'd been missing a coat, etc., she would've made the trip home for it. Ya know, kids know exactly who they can wrap around their little fingers.
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Cat Herder 04:57 AM 01-08-2020
There seems to be a social media/mommy playgroup pendulum swing as a backlash from the "mommy wars" wave (which was horrible, too).

IMO, In an attempt to ease mom's stress by empathizing and letting them know we all struggle, no matter how easy we make it look, it seems some have taken it too far. The "they won't remember anyway, so why bother?" wave of social permission is strong these days.

Hopefully, we will see some balance soon.

I just require them to keep a complete change of clothing to include shoes, socks, coat, gloves, here to counteract these kinds of mornings. I send them home the way they came, though so my set stays complete.
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Snowmom 07:55 AM 01-08-2020
I know you said they'll be leaving soon, so you're not too concerned with it. And yes, it is an odd generation now that lets kids do what they want, when they want with no consequences.

The only thing I'd want to point out, is that YOU control YOUR environment. If the kids need socks there, then they should arrive wearing socks or be sent home. When there is a consequence for not following policy, the policy WILL be adhered to going forward because it inconvenienced the adult.

I personally don't care about the "Joey wouldn't let me" excuse. It is what it is... I have a policy, you'll follow it because it's what's required to enroll here OR you find someplace else and I'll replace you.
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Ariana 09:47 AM 01-08-2020
She has bought into the whole “pick your battles because parenting is sooooooo hard #winetime #terribletwos #mommyneedsabreak.” It is rampant.

I would have replied with “try 10 ” and laughed. No way would I let that comment slide without a remark. What a moron!!
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LostMyMarbles 04:35 AM 01-09-2020
I always respond back with, if you think three is hard you should try 12!
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Cat Herder 05:35 AM 01-09-2020
Originally Posted by Harry Potter:
More understanding, more communication, this situation can only be so.
With most parents this is true.

Posters come here to vent and seek advice about the others. The difficult parents.

We don't need to vent about the rational ones. We probably should talk about the good ones more, though. Human nature, I suppose.

Welcome!! Stick around. We could use a kick in the rear for positivity. Thanks for that.
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Msdunny 06:08 AM 01-09-2020
For me, the one child whose mom supposedly can’t get her to cooperate is our most helpful child. Whatever we ask, she is quick to obey. And she won’t even be 2 until later this month. I definitely think it is the expectations. Kids know who is serious and will follow through, and who won’t.

But maybe that’s what we are so good at our jobs!!
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Blackcat31 06:13 AM 01-09-2020
Originally Posted by Cat Herder:
With most parents this is true.

Welcome!! Stick around. We could use a kick in the rear for positivity. Thanks for that.
Unfortunately, they weren't looking to provide positivity.
They wanted to sell us desk organizers.
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Unregistered 07:13 AM 01-09-2020
Thank you all for the responses! I'm really glad I found this forum I've read so many treads on here and just though wow where has this been this whole time lol! You're right I really should just have said "yea try ten" that would have been a perfect response! To the person who commented on venting vs positivity on the forum, I'm thinking it's more because it's easy to share with anyone in our lives (husband, friend, neighbor) all the positive funny stuff that happens at work because anyone can get that but not everyone will really relate to our troubles so we need people who relate to really get that affirmation. For example if I told my husband this story I'm not going to get an "oh no she didn't!" moment from him lol but he'll get a good laugh about how we were looking for dcb hat a half hour before outside time only to find he'd shoved it down the front of his onsie😂
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Cat Herder 07:54 AM 01-09-2020
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
Unfortunately, they weren't looking to provide positivity.
They wanted to sell us desk organizers.
Well, darn.

I was hoping for some light. It's winter, rainy and blah. I figured we all could.

I like organizers, the problem was that my space was becoming cluttered with organizers. I just tossed the stuff, donated the organizers and solved the problem.
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Ariana 09:10 AM 01-09-2020
I didn’t see the Harry Potter post but I really hate it when people chime in with “be more positive”...as if we hadn’t tried that already I literally have nowhere else to vent besides this forum. We are entrepreneurs who work alone. My mother is a social worker and she got to vent with her colleagues once a week in a staff room and it was mandatory for their mental health. Venting IS healthy and therapeutic. Positivity all the time, understanding all the time, compassion all the time is not healthy or rational!

Just my 2 cents
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Cat Herder 10:07 AM 01-09-2020
Originally Posted by Ariana:
I didn’t see the Harry Potter post
It said in the title something to the effect of "more communication with one another will lead to a better understanding of each other." Then "More understanding, more communication, this situation can only be so."

The comment, in and of itself, was thought-provoking and I liked it very much.

I agree with you, though. We need to be able to vent. It is a known factor in preventing child abuse. Walk away, vent to peers, take a breath, commiserate, ask advice, then formulate a new plan to try again or end the contract.
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Unregistered 09:29 AM 01-13-2020
Hi,I am replying as unregistered as I am now retired as of a month ago from being a daycare Mom for 37 yrs and am now enjoying the quietness during the day! So,so nice!
To answer your question- Yes, I have had a number of parents say things like that to me throughout the years.
One little girl around 2 yrs old came one day,in the middle of winter which that day was near 0 degrees with no socks on. Her Mom carried her in the house. I said "What, no socks, bare feet!" Her Mom's reply was" She wouldn't let me get the socks on this morning,so I figured she would let you get them on so here they are!" I'm thinking to myself WHAT you have to be kidding me,all you have to do is PUT the socks on her,your the boss,not her. So when Mom left, I said lets put your socks on and they were on,no fuss!
I have found that doing daycare as long as I did that some parents these days just don't want to really take the time to discipline and be the boss and just let their child do whatever they want so they don't have to listen to a fussy kid. It's easier for the parent to give in then taking the time to discipline. Anyway,that's my take on parenting these days.
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CeriBear 05:32 AM 01-15-2020
Three kids? I think I might have laughed at that statement. I have to get at least 10 kids out the door every day.
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CountryRoads 06:58 AM 01-15-2020
Yes, I've had parents say things like that.

I have one that complains how hard it is to get out the house with 2 kids and that's why she always late to work.

I had one parent complain about how long her 10 hour days (4 days a week) are and she's exhausted by the end of the day. Um, I work longer than that, every day. Her child was here those whole 10 hours, so I'm not sure why SHE was complaining to ME about long days

I hear all the time about how hard it is to get anything done with kids around (usually the reason for bringing their kids when they aren't working), yet I manage to get my chores done, house clean, and care for 5-8 kids everyday.

I always have to bite my tongue when I hear such comments
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Unregistered 10:47 AM 01-15-2020
Originally Posted by CountryRoads:
Yes, I've had parents say things like that.

I have one that complains how hard it is to get out the house with 2 kids and that's why she always late to work.

I had one parent complain about how long her 10 hour days (4 days a week) are and she's exhausted by the end of the day. Um, I work longer than that, every day. Her child was here those whole 10 hours, so I'm not sure why SHE was complaining to ME about long days :con
I hear all the time about how hard it is to get anything done with kids around (usually the reason for bringing their kids when they aren't working), yet I manage to get my chores done, house clean, and care for 5-8 kids everyday.

I always have to bite my tongue when I hear such comments
I had parents say those same things to me also. I am retired now so thankfully I don't have to deal with those kinds of parents. One example is I had my own 2 boys who were toddlers at the time, plus one little daycare child who was 3 yrs old. Daycare Mom had the day off but brought her child to me anyway saying she had errands to run but didn't want the hassle of taking her child with that day.
Well turns out I also had errands to run that day so I took my kids and my daycare child with, (3 toddlers). Well as I am entering the store with the kids, who comes out of the store at the same time.....my daycare Mom! Well she says HI and goes to her car. WOW, now I managed my errands with my kids and hers! At pick up she said not a word about having to take her child with!
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Tags:parent - its a verb, parents - are clueless
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