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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>*sigh* Just Venting.......
crazydaycarelady 07:26 AM 10-03-2012
One particular dcm is on my nerve this week. I'll have to "talk" to her tonight but I feel like I shouldn't have to, if these people would just do what they are supposed to do!

Payday was Monday - $810 - Wednesday morning still no pay. I can be flexible if you pay every week but when you pay once per month for 2 kids you need to be ontime with your payment!

Also all this week she has brought dcbaby in PJ's. I am sure she has seen the other baby in pj's and thinks she can do it too - only thing is the other baby comes at 6:30am and goes back to bed. When you have regular work hours you can dress your own kid!
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Breezy 07:30 AM 10-03-2012
Ugh I hate having to chase people for payment!

DCM brings dcb in pajamas or just in a diaper usually every day. drives me crazy. I always make a comment about it and she says oh I just was running so late this morning and I just put him in his car seat.

She doesn't feed him before he comes either.. must be rough to only feed your child one meal in the evening and whine to me when you pick up that you don't want to take care of him when you pick him up after I have taken care of more than just her kid for the last 10 hours!
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HappyHearts 07:53 AM 10-03-2012
Ugh! I sympathize with you about the payment. Fortunately I don't have a problem with late payments, but the pajama thing, oh yes, been there before!

I had a mom that always brought her 18 month old in her pj's, and would carry her in and hand her to me, and that is when I would end up soaked from a soggy night-time diaper! So, not only changing her, I also would have to go change my clothes. It was frustrating. Took me several months to get through to her. Everyday I would tell her, and she would say she didn't notice!

That was a long time ago, haven't had anyone like that since.
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crazydaycarelady 08:33 AM 10-03-2012
Fortunately she DOES change the diaper, but then I think "You're halfway there already, just put clothes on her!"
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cheerfuldom 08:44 AM 10-03-2012
yeah it is very annoying to have to say things like this. I think parents just get busy and get in their own world and do what is easiest for them....which is let the daycare lady take care of it. They start doing less and less and dont really care that their kid is in a sopping wet diaper.

as for payment, yeah you really need to refuse them at the door on Monday morning to get thru to some parents.
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littlemissmuffet 09:52 AM 10-03-2012
Payment: My policy is $25-$30/day late fee for the first day, second day is charged the same fee and no care until payment is made, third day is termination and brought to court for full payment plus late fees (continues to build up until paid in full), court/lawyer fees, and any days missed from work due to court appearances. I've always been paid by the second day.

PJs: That's fine but the child will remain in jammies the whole day. I will not dress a child for the day, that's a parent's job, not mine.

Still in night-time diaper: The second time this happens, I feel the child as soon as they come in and if their wet/dirty, I require the parents comes in and changes child before work. I tell them "I don't send home baby dirty, so please don't send them to me dirty". Usually one or two times of the parent having to come in, take their shoes off, get a diaper, get wipes and change the child while I am doing other stuff - they won't do it again.

Good luck.
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canadiancare 10:04 AM 10-03-2012
That is one of my biggest weaknesses even after 21 years. I HATE chasing after people for fees. I tell them at the interview that I plan my budget (mortgage, car payments etc) according to when I get paid and I don't care how you pay (cash, cheque instant transfer) or how often, weekly, biweekly or monthly as long as you pay me when you are supposed to consistently.

I have one mum who has an excuse every time as to why my pay is late....I don't even particularly enjoy her child and yet I still keep my mouth shut and wait. I think to myself that I shouldn't have to have the anxiety of asking people for money and yet I do. EVERY time I also find myself making sure she isn't going to be tight by paying me as if her debts are more important than mine.

I recognise that this attitude devalues my service but I always feel bad as if I am taking food out of the kid's mouth or something.
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DBug 10:25 AM 10-03-2012
Originally Posted by canadiancare:
I recognise that this attitude devalues my service but I always feel bad as if I am taking food out of the kid's mouth or something.
If you provide meals and snacks, you're using that money to put food into the child's mouth.
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canadiancare 10:27 AM 10-03-2012
Originally Posted by DBug:
If you provide meals and snacks, you're using that money to put food into the child's mouth.
ha I know it My husband calls me a bleeding heart. I do have to wonder why she keeps banking with an institution that screws up so often....rolls eyes.
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Blackcat31 10:29 AM 10-03-2012
Originally Posted by canadiancare:
That is one of my biggest weaknesses even after 21 years. I HATE chasing after people for fees. I tell them at the interview that I plan my budget (mortgage, car payments etc) according to when I get paid and I don't care how you pay (cash, cheque instant transfer) or how often, weekly, biweekly or monthly as long as you pay me when you are supposed to consistently.

I have one mum who has an excuse every time as to why my pay is late....I don't even particularly enjoy her child and yet I still keep my mouth shut and wait. I think to myself that I shouldn't have to have the anxiety of asking people for money and yet I do. EVERY time I also find myself making sure she isn't going to be tight by paying me as if her debts are more important than mine.

I recognise that this attitude devalues my service but I always feel bad as if I am taking food out of the kid's mouth or something.
But aren't the non-paying parents taking food out of your kids' mouths?

I don't chase my paycheck either. I charge a $10 late fee per day for 1st late payment, $20 per day for second late payment and the 3rd late payment is immediate termination.

NO SERVICES are ever provided if ANY payment is late.

Child care is NOT a charity.

I work hard and expect to be paid in a timely manner. DCF's can give me all sorts of excuses and sob stories but I simply listen and NEVER let it control or impact their payment obligations. I have my own excuses and sob stories if they would like to hear them.

Timely payments are non-negotiable and this is stressed at the interview so that it is never something a parent ever feels they can change or negotiate with me about.
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mrsp'slilpeeps 10:37 AM 10-03-2012
I just put a white board sign on my front door that says Payments are due today
Solves my problem the first of every month!
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crazydaycarelady 11:43 AM 10-03-2012
Originally Posted by :
That is one of my biggest weaknesses even after 21 years. I HATE chasing after people for fees. I tell them at the interview that I plan my budget (mortgage, car payments etc) according to when I get paid and I don't care how you pay (cash, cheque instant transfer) or how often, weekly, biweekly or monthly as long as you pay me when you are supposed to consistently.

I recognise that this attitude devalues my service but I always feel bad as if I am taking food out of the kid's mouth or something.
I feel the same as you. 21 in business also and I am still W~E~A~K!

I also allow them to pick their own paydate so I am flexible that way, but once you pick it you stick with it!

Originally Posted by :
Payment: My policy is $25-$30/day late fee for the first day, second day is charged the same fee and no care until payment is made, third day is termination and brought to court for full payment plus late fees (continues to build up until paid in full), court/lawyer fees, and any days missed from work due to court appearances. I've always been paid by the second day.
Dcm DID pay me today when she dropped off preschool boy. Yeah - if you date it for the 1st but don't give it to me until the 3rd - it's still late!
This is GOOD! I might have to implement. I don't have a big problem with late payers but this would probably eliminate it altogether.

Dcm DID pay me today when she dropped off preschool boy. Yeah - if you date it for the 1st but don't give it to me until the 3rd - it's still late!
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Mommy2One 12:52 PM 10-03-2012
Maybe this should be it's own thread, but if anyone wants to expand on WHY they don't like to have kiddos show up in pajamas I'd love to have it for reference, especially the ones that have low enrollment (our provider just takes care of 1-2 kids besides her own, our included so the argument that it'd be disruptive to dress 6-8 kids every morning wouldn't help)

I have to argue with not just my 3 year old, but frequently my HUSBAND as well and insist that DD must be dressed, fed and have her hair fixed before I drop her off at our provider's house and yes she does need to be wearing comfortable play clothes and closed toes shoes with traction (not dresses or tutus) because they play outside most days. (My daughter can dress herself for the most part, she just doesn't want to get out of her warm comfy pajamas some days - which I can I totally relate to!) My husband suggests that our provider won't mind, that we're paying her to care for our child for 9 hours/day and part of caring for a child is changing her clothes. I've even told him that I visit a daycare forum and it drives the ladies on there nuts but then he just tells me to stay off the Internet
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Lucy 01:27 PM 10-03-2012
Originally Posted by crazydaycarelady:
Also all this week she has brought dcbaby in PJ's. I am sure she has seen the other baby in pj's and thinks she can do it too - only thing is the other baby comes at 6:30am and goes back to bed. When you have regular work hours you can dress your own kid!
I've had this happen. A young mom was bringing 18 mo old in pajamas and said "his clothes are in the bag". Guess what? He went home in pajamas. Yep. Not my job. If it happened very rarely where they honestly were late and didn't have time... and ASKED instead of telling me... I would do it. But just to be lazy and have me do it, nope. Also, when they have to completely unsnap them and take their legs out of the pj's to change diapers, why not change their dang clothes at the same time??? I just don't get it. Anyway, this happened 3 or 4 times and she finally got the hint and never brought him in pj's again.
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Lucy 01:29 PM 10-03-2012
Originally Posted by crazydaycarelady:
Fortunately she DOES change the diaper, but then I think "You're halfway there already, just put clothes on her!"
EXACTLY! (Didn't see this before I posted above lol)
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daycarediva 01:32 PM 10-03-2012
Originally Posted by Mommy2One:
Maybe this should be it's own thread, but if anyone wants to expand on WHY they don't like to have kiddos show up in pajamas I'd love to have it for reference, especially the ones that have low enrollment (our provider just takes care of 1-2 kids besides her own, our included so the argument that it'd be disruptive to dress 6-8 kids every morning wouldn't help)

I have to argue with not just my 3 year old, but frequently my HUSBAND as well and insist that DD must be dressed, fed and have her hair fixed before I drop her off at our provider's house and yes she does need to be wearing comfortable play clothes and closed toes shoes with traction (not dresses or tutus) because they play outside most days. (My daughter can dress herself for the most part, she just doesn't want to get out of her warm comfy pajamas some days - which I can I totally relate to!) My husband suggests that our provider won't mind, that we're paying her to care for our child for 9 hours/day and part of caring for a child is changing her clothes. I've even told him that I visit a daycare forum and it drives the ladies on there nuts but then he just tells me to stay off the Internet
I don't think it's a matter of inconvenience even (with 1-2 kids) I think it's disrespectful. Plus, it's YOUR child, not mine. Mine are dressed and ready to go before I open. I have made arrangements with ONE family that drops off a LO early (leave their house at 5:30-5:45 AM depending on traffic and weather) and arrive at my house at 6:00ish, that she can come in jammies, because she goes right back to bed.

When my oldest was in daycare, we would have a breakfast together in the morning, ALWAYS. It was part of our routine. She wanted to wear pj's and comfy clothes, and I bought matching track suits, or plush suits, etc. I think you're missing out on that time. Plus at 3, it becomes a routine, and those routines won't have to be started in kindergaten.
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Country Kids 01:38 PM 10-03-2012
My parents never came to the door to find any (unless an infant and then rarely) of my own children still in the pajamas. My kids were up and dressed for the day when the first child arrived. This was as early as 6:30 in the morning but they were up and ready to go. It was also a point to show parents that if I can have me and four children up and ready there is no reason they couldn't.

This was my job and if they were going out the door to a childcare, I would have had them up and fed/dressed also. When I did work outside the home, I had to drop my little one off at 5:30 in the morning. They were up at 4:30/dressed/fed breakfast and then we left. So when I have had parents tell me they don't have time, I let them know that yes its hard but its a requirement to come. here. If I could do it that early in the a.m., I'm sure someone that has to be at work at 8:00 can find the time.

Let your hubs know that no, its not our job-its the parents job. Let him know that she won't be allowed to show up to preschool/school in her pajamas. I let my parents know that I'm the training ground for parents and kids to see how they will handle mornings when the child has to go to schoo.
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Lucy 01:39 PM 10-03-2012
Originally Posted by Mommy2One:
Maybe this should be it's own thread, but if anyone wants to expand on WHY they don't like to have kiddos show up in pajamas I'd love to have it for reference, especially the ones that have low enrollment (our provider just takes care of 1-2 kids besides her own, our included so the argument that it'd be disruptive to dress 6-8 kids every morning wouldn't help)

I have to argue with not just my 3 year old, but frequently my HUSBAND as well and insist that DD must be dressed, fed and have her hair fixed before I drop her off at our provider's house and yes she does need to be wearing comfortable play clothes and closed toes shoes with traction (not dresses or tutus) because they play outside most days. (My daughter can dress herself for the most part, she just doesn't want to get out of her warm comfy pajamas some days - which I can I totally relate to!) My husband suggests that our provider won't mind, that we're paying her to care for our child for 9 hours/day and part of caring for a child is changing her clothes. I've even told him that I visit a daycare forum and it drives the ladies on there nuts but then he just tells me to stay off the Internet
I feel that changing them falls into the "nanny" category. My job is to supervise them while you're at work. Yes, I feed them because they are here 8-10 hours and HAVE to eat. Yes, I change diapers for the same reason I just stated. But other personal care, or activities of daily living are the parents' job, not mine. I don't brush their hair, brush their teeth, give them vitamins, give them a bath, etc. etc. Those are activities of daily living that are out of the realm of Daycare or Babysitting. In my opinion, anyway. I know that many on here feel differently and wouldn't mind dressing their daycare kids, but this is how I personally see it. It just comes off to me as the parent pushing their own duties off onto us. Maybe they need to feel like our "boss" or something. Like "I pay you, so you do what I tell you." That's just how it makes me feel. Your mileage may vary.
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canadiancare 01:50 PM 10-03-2012
I will do occasional pajama days just because it is fun for the kids but only on special occasions. For example Halloween. Instead of coming in a costume they can come in pjs.

On that note if they come in a costume they aren't allowed any accessories and the parents have to accept that I am not responsible if it falls apart before they can go trick or treating.
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bunnyslippers 02:00 PM 10-03-2012
I will not change into clothes unless the parents have discussed it with me beforehand. I also don't comb hair, finish breakfast that was started in the car, or brush teeth. Do it before you get to my house.
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nanglgrl 04:28 PM 10-03-2012
Originally Posted by Lucy:
I feel that changing them falls into the "nanny" category. My job is to supervise them while you're at work. Yes, I feed them because they are here 8-10 hours and HAVE to eat. Yes, I change diapers for the same reason I just stated. But other personal care, or activities of daily living are the parents' job, not mine. I don't brush their hair, brush their teeth, give them vitamins, give them a bath, etc. etc. Those are activities of daily living that are out of the realm of Daycare or Babysitting. In my opinion, anyway. I know that many on here feel differently and wouldn't mind dressing their daycare kids, but this is how I personally see it. It just comes off to me as the parent pushing their own duties off onto us. Maybe they need to feel like our "boss" or something. Like "I pay you, so you do what I tell you." That's just how it makes me feel. Your mileage may vary.
Exactly, and I LOVE the highlighted part.

Originally Posted by bunnyslippers:
I will not change into clothes unless the parents have discussed it with me beforehand. I also don't comb hair, finish breakfast that was started in the car, or brush teeth. Do it before you get to my house.

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Cat Herder 04:38 PM 10-03-2012
On the money issue. NO PAY NO STAY. I enforce this one HARD. I have no problem turning them away at the door. I can't see them going back to their job without payment, either.

For jammies:

If the DCM is not wearing makeup, has bedhead and looks thrown together herself, I can laugh off an occassional PJ drop off day on a toddler or preschooler. (insert old Cathy cartoon image here)

I prefer them for infants.
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Heidi 06:25 PM 10-03-2012
Originally Posted by Mommy2One:
Maybe this should be it's own thread, but if anyone wants to expand on WHY they don't like to have kiddos show up in pajamas I'd love to have it for reference, especially the ones that have low enrollment (our provider just takes care of 1-2 kids besides her own, our included so the argument that it'd be disruptive to dress 6-8 kids every morning wouldn't help)

I have to argue with not just my 3 year old, but frequently my HUSBAND as well and insist that DD must be dressed, fed and have her hair fixed before I drop her off at our provider's house and yes she does need to be wearing comfortable play clothes and closed toes shoes with traction (not dresses or tutus) because they play outside most days. (My daughter can dress herself for the most part, she just doesn't want to get out of her warm comfy pajamas some days - which I can I totally relate to!) My husband suggests that our provider won't mind, that we're paying her to care for our child for 9 hours/day and part of caring for a child is changing her clothes. I've even told him that I visit a daycare forum and it drives the ladies on there nuts but then he just tells me to stay off the Internet
For me, if it's the exception, not the rule, that's fine. I think we're talking about parents who do it regularly and expect it.

I had a 4 yo for a while that would pull the "I don't want to get dressed". I TOLD his mom to bring him in his pj's. Then, he would need to sit somewhere off to the side and get dressed once he got here. Once he was ready, he could join the group. Matter-of-fact-like...

But, that's a situation where he was being stubborn, and was perfectly capable of getting dressed himself. That's a bit different than someone handing over their sopping wet, pajama'd baby or toddler every morning.
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