Background Info:

Mom and dad live in an apartment in a suburb very near Minneapolis. My mom is a caretaker and dad works for the property manager. They get their rent free for all that my mom does (she is basically the assistant to the assistant manager- my uncle is the property manager). The apartment complex is not in a good area (it used to be years ago) and I would like to compare it to North Mpls but it is not THAT bad but getting there (those that are from MN know what I mean).

My mom and dad share a room with my brother (8) and my sister has her own room until she leaves for college in the fall (18).

My brother is the "weird" one I guess you could say. He is VERY into school. Has a lot of interests that he researchs to no end (currently WW2). I don't think this is weird but I can see where the kids he interacts with would.

Anyway......

He is getting beat up. He tries to play it off like its ok and that he doesn't mind but its because he doesn't want anyone to get into trouble. Yesterday he came home from school with a huge red mark all over his face. Some kid on the bus punched him in the face for getting too close. My brother begged my mom to not call the principal and she hasn't yet.

When I was in MN she got a call from the principal saying that he was involved in an altercation on the bus. I guess someone targeted him again and punched him in the nose. The kids parents had to come in to the school- the child lives in the same complex as my brother.

He has been pushed up against walls and choked at the complex, he has been choked on the playground more than once just in the past school year.

I took him out to dinner on Valentines Day when I was in town and I asked if he likes school and he said no he wishes he could stay home with my mom all the time. He is scared of the "cool" kids at school that walk around with their body guards. This is ELEMENTARY school!

He is very good in school and gets straight As. He is reading at a very high level. Loves math.

My mom has thought about open enrolling him to Maple Grove elementary school or Osseo area schools. My sister went to Osseo and I went to Maple Grove.

WWYD? Is this just typical kids being kids or is this something serious?

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No, this is not typical kid stuff. Your brother is being terrorized and the school needs to do something about it. The day may come when your brother tires of it and does something to himself to end it.

Personally, I would transfer him out of that school ASAP.

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Your brother sounds like an intellectually gifted little boy. Of course, he has to be a geek! As the mother of 4 geeks (and somewhat of one myself), I can totally relate.

Any chance your mom would let me adopt him? lol

If your mom has even the slightest ability, she should consder home-schooling for the rest of the year, and then go to another school via open enrollment. I don't know how homeschooling laws are in MN compared to WI, but here you just have to file a paper with DPI, and you can do that online. Literally, she wouldn't have to send him back on Monday! I would not for ONE SECOND tolerate my child being treated like that, and honestly, the school will probably give you a lot of smoke-and-mirrors, and your brother's self-esteem will continue to plummet as they try to figure out solutions.

As for homeschooling, your brother sounds like he would be an excellent candidate. He sounds highly motivated to learn, and your mom could let him take the lead. He does not need to have a formal "curriculum" for the rest of this year.

For next school year, they could either continue this, or check into the open enrollment. Are there any charter schools he could attend specifically for kids with special interests? Another option in WI is virtual schools.

Good luck! If you need any help finding HS resources, I would be happy to help. Just PM me....

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I'd say that your brother is definitely being bullied. Ks is getting strict about anti-bullying. I don't think they would put up with it here.

I don't know why the teachers or bus driver haven't caught the behavior that is hurting your brother.

As a mom, I would pull him for a different school district today.

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Here's a start on the charter schools...

http://www.mncharterschools.org/dire...ctoriesCatID=1

The other thing I thought of is that some private schools offer scholarships. If there is a private school for gifted children around, def. call them about that possibility.

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This upsets me to no end. My son was the same way and we ended up home schooling. If you PM me the specifics on the school, city, names I would take the time to call your local school board and police. This should not be tollerated at all. The school and police have an obligation to protect. They need to be notified ASAP or this will only escalate.

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Thank you so much for your responses. She kept him home with her today because she has had ENOUGH.

As far as Home schooling I am not sure if she could HS him as she has a very hectic schedule despite being home all day. She cleans the buildings, maintains them, and then handles all delinquent rent accounts. She does more work than everyone combined. At the end of the month she has multiple apartments to turn over. BUT it is something to look into and think about even if it is just for the rest of the school year. I will mention it to her today and get some info to back it up. He is highly gifted (as were both my sister and I in school) and I feel like his potential is being held back IYKWIM?

Private school may be an option- I am not sure what they have in the area. I went to private school in 2nd grade (catholic school) I will look into that as well.

THANK YOU for confirming what I already knew that this is not normal.

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Virtual school may be an option as someone else said. Here, they even provide the computers.

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Mom needs to call the school! REGARDLESS of what your brother wants. I am saying this for your brothers safety. He is 8! It is your moms responsbility to make decisions regarding his safety. He should get no say! I have heard of so many stories where kids begged their parents not to do something and in the end the parents ended up feeling guilty for not taking it seriously and reporting it. If you mom doesnt get the response she needs from the school, go to the school administrators, to the schoolboard, blast it all over a social website. Whatever it takes.

Most school districts have Bullying Protocol, maybe find out what it is in your area.

My son has been diagnosed with PDD-NOS and ADHD but back in my day, he would have been the "geek" that is a tad bit socially awekward. I got him a lifeskills coach and he has really helped him with his self esteem and empowering himself against bully type behavior.

I wish you the best of luck. What an awesome sister you are for caring so much!

There's lots of websites out there too.

try

http://www.stopbullying.gov/

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Your poor brother. It sounds like he is strong-willed and big hearted in order to put up with such abuse and not wanting the other boys to get in trouble. I am sure he fears further retaliation. No child should have to live like this.

Even though I'm in MN, I don't have much advice for you. My nephew and his family live in Champlin and he was getting bullied, his mom transferred him to a magnet school, I believe in Brooklyn Center (or Brooklyn Park), but am not sure.

I read a very sad story today http://www.kptv.com/story/17117683/f...nuous-bullying. Please keep (as close as you can) a close eye on your brother.

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Breezy-follow that link to the Charter Schools. I just spent a few minutes on there, and I WISH we had those schools here! There is sure to be one right up your brother's alley. It won't help him this year, but for next. Charter schools are PUBLIC schools, so he can go there under open enrollment...free!

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I am looking at the Charter link right now. And the HSing one. And talking to my mom. It makes me want to move home SO badly. If I lived there I know things would be different. I could help transport him to a different school, I could even have him at my home for HSing if virtual if my mom needed to do things around the complex or go to the office, etc. I would do anything for my brother- he deserves the world. And I have considered multiple times just moving home with my DS to help him and my mom and dad. Obviously that would ruin my marriage but I just wish I could do more.

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She says that she has made the decision so far that if they don't get to move to a different complex before next school year she is going to put him in a different school. I am giving her the info about HSing at least for the rest of the year.

Her uncle died today though so I don't know if her mind is in the right place to be having this discussion.

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Can you take your brother in for the rest of the school year?

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Yes, this is what I was going to suggest. My son also took courses online. He loves to learn and loves school. A gifted child can get a lot achieved in this area. He will he the better for it. I would be willing to get my son in touch with your brother. They sound very similar. He uses Jonathan.com as his site.

We are also WWII buffs and I have a lot of WWII medals, gear and even Hitler's picture of Eva Braun from his Eagles Nest retreat desk. Here is also an article we did with George E. Elliott Jr. who was the radar operator that first viewed the Japanese Zeros approaching Pearl Harbor at Kahuku Point, Oahu. http://pearl-harbor.com/georgeelliott/

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I would love to and I sure could but he wouldn't last one night away from my mom. He went to the children's museum earlier this week and was so scared they wouldn't make it back on the bus and he would never see her again. He almost didn't go.

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I am going to e-mail that article to my mom so she can show my brother. He blows my mind with the things he knows and he always wants to learn more. My husband is in the Air Force and so he calls him all the time and asks him things about the military. He loves Google and googles everything!!

My mom was here visiting last month and we went to the Pima Air and Space Museum Gift Shop to get him a gift and she found this kids flight jacket and bought it for him and he fell IN LOVE. He said it was the best gift he had ever recieved.

I am just so proud of him in case you couldn't tell.

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Poor little guy.

I would:

A) March on that bus, find out who the bullies are and meet with their parents - even if it upsets your little brother. That horrid behavior NEEDS to stop.

B) Change schools.

C) Home school.

Please let us know what happens...

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One of my children were being picked on and my husband followed the bus, followed the kid up to their house. When the mom came out first words "what did they do know?"

We had no problems after that!

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Breezy!! How awful...could your mom send him out here to finish the school yr? What I keep picturing is that beautiful boy who had music playing in the back ground and didn't speak but with white cards telling about his bullying in school...it made me cry it was so heart retching...the agony that child was going through and voiced it through utube.

That school needs to be notified and the parents need to be brought in. Your mother needs to find out what is put place for bulling and how they deal with incidents brought to their attention. If the school does nothing about it then I would advise your mother to contact an attorney. My son in law and his mother sued his school for bullying and won. Something needs to be done and now. Children need be held responsible for bullying and the school needs to get involved. Even the school buses and system. Everyone needs to crack down on bullying it should not be tolerated!

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Also, my daughter has a webisode about bullying. Very important topic. It happens way too much: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uHchc4f-nDQ

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My daughter goes to an online charter school. Maryland state doesnt offer it free but many states do.

Here is the virtual academy that my 14 yr old daughter goes to

www.connectionsacademy.com

we also looked into

www.k12.com

It is really amazing! She even has made a great group of friends that are in her "classes".

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We did a year of Connections Academy and I simply loved it. Was lots of work but worth it. It was free for us and we had a great year!

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Thank you all for your wonderful advice and compassion. I am going to look through all the information that you have given me and forward it on to my mom. I hope you don't think badly of she and my father for not doing something sooner- she is extremly worried but this is so new to her and she has never had to deal with something like this before. Plus, until very recently she has had her hands tied as far as another school district because my sister got into an accident and totalled the car and they were down to one vehicle which my dad needed for work. They now have purchased a new car as of a few weeks ago and so she has more options now.

I think the first step is to contact the school.. Maybe they just don't have anything in place to handle bullying since it is an elementry school. Who knows but I will for surely find out. That reminds me, there was recently an incident at that school where a bomb of some sort was made out of a water bottle and some other corrosive material and they were left on the playground. A child picked it up at recess and opened it and was blasted by this bomb. He went to the ER and was ok but seriously? These are little kids!! The school didn't seem to do much of anything but it was on the news and I know the police were called but nothing was done to follow up.

I know that schools do their very best in most cases with the limited resources they have but something needs to be done nation wide. These kids are being bullied at younger and younger ages. These are the kids of our future and I shudder to think of them leading our country in years to come......


Ok getting off my soap box now and going grocery shopping. Thanks again everyone

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its been a bad week for ds (age 9) your mom needs to go in and raise, hell, go over the principal, doesn't matter. Call the bus company, get the bus driver involved, she has to be her sons advocate. Lets just say, after this week ds is not being bullied and finally had a good day, but I had to let them know that I'm not going to stand in the corner while he is bullied.

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This is scary! As a mom if my kid was being terrorized like that, I would keep her home and home school her. That's just my first reaction. Actually being in that place would be very hard. I hate bullies!

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I've been in your parents' place; I don't think badly of them because I know it can be a tough call. My own son was bullied throughout his school years. He also pleaded with me not to call the school because he said it would make things even worse for him. After hearing stories from other parents about how reports of bullying were handled, I felt my son was right. He got through it but not without some emotional scars. I'm hoping the new school bullying laws will help to make things better for kids who are currently experiencing bullying.

If I had to do it over again, I would home school him or enroll him in an online school. Kids like my son and your brother are very intelligent. They're so hungry to learn, they do well academically whether they're in a traditional school setting or not. There are so many options for education open to families now. I'm sure your mom can find an alternative that would allow your bother to learn while working around her job schedule. Good luck. He's lucky to have a sister who loves him as much as you do.

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I have not read all of the other posts but here's my two cents worth:

Your brother is in elementary school, therefore he is about 11 or younger. He has a long way to go in terms of education.

Your mom needs to be proactive in handling these situations and step up to the plate. The parents of these other kids need to be called and informed of what is going on while on school property or on the bus.

I'm in Iowa and all of our buses have cameras. They usually don't have audio feed but you don't need it when you are dealing with physical altercations. I would contact the transportation office and ask if the buses are equipped with cameras.

This bus driver also has the right to kick kids off the bus for not following the rules. If fights continue to persist, find out what the school intends to do about it.

My daughter was just comfronted on the bus by a peer last week and was threatened that she was going to beat her and kill her. My daughter came home told us and went to school the next day and told teachers. The principal called me later that afternoon and told me she would be looking into it and I would get a call after they collected further information.

From my understanding this isn't the first time this child has made threats. I'm unclear if she's acted them out but I'm not going to stand back and find out.

When it comes to my kids, these other kids are going to have to pass me to get to them and that just isn't going to happen.

I have absolutely no problem calling a parent up or showing up at their door and telling them that their kid is a little jerk and had better knock their crap off. Most times parents relate and the child faces the consequences. Unfortunately, other times, parents don't know how to be a parent and could care less it's happening.

I would be willing to bet that the child's parents probably have no clue what is going on. They need to be informed so they can handle their child how they feel fit.

If it continues, I would check into another elementary school or an entirely different district.

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Your brother needs to sit up front near the bus driver. The bullies need to be reported so that they no longer have the privilege of riding a bus.

If it's not reported, it will continue. The school needs to bring the parents in and the parents need to drive the hooligans to school. That's the only way the parents will get involved - when it affects THEM.

It's so sad that the dirt bags are taking over.

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Honestly, if they can possibly do it (it can be accomplished for little of no monetary outlay), he is a prime candidate for home schooling. In all honesty the public schools are probably holding his learning back. He could excel at home, from what you have told me. That's enough to make him a target. They should seriously consider it and even talk to other home schoolers.

Other than that, it is up to the parents to stand up for the child. Period. Even if they are afraid. Sometimes we have to do what we are afraid to do or what we don't want to do for our children. Even standing up to bullies (even if they are family).

Hope they work this out, and soon, before their son is really hurt badly!

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