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daycare 05:16 PM 10-23-2015
So all of my families have decided to pick up at 400-4:15pm but one. Which this all came about this month. Everyone is paying my 430 pick up rate but have been picking up early for whatever reason.

In past months, I normally close at 515, but was able to close at 445 most days and 430 on Friday. I just adjusted my times because everyone but this one family was not picking up at the same time and I was staying open an hour later just for them. that got old really quick.

So just when everyone was on board with similar pick up times, the rest of my DCP decide to pick up earlier....Yeah for me.

Well my last two kids that are here are normally here for about 20-30 minutes later than everyone else., sometimes longer. So we let them read books or play a CLEAN and quite activity like puzzles until its time to go home. My staff and I clean up while they wait to be picked up. These kids are 5 and 6. They are siblings and when everyone else is gone, these two fight each other non-stop.

I have not asked the parents to pick up any earlier, because I just adjusted my close time about a month ago and made them pick up earlier, because I know that the parents can. they work from home around the corner and I know for a fact they are done working around 4-4:30pm, but it was their choice to pay the MUCH higher rate to have the kids stay later, i am fine with that.

Well dcm comes to pick up and the kids start whining right away why did you take so long to get here we are super bored and want to go home early like everyone else. DCM looks at me. I said yeah everyone went home today around 4 today, so they haven't had any play partners for the last 45 min. The DCP are awesome, I love them to death. I am not complaining at all about the fact that they set their phone alarm and pick up right on the dot every day. Hey they pay for it so it's all good.

So here is where the issue comes up. DCM just text me asking if I can play with them when all of the other kids leave instead of clean up because the whole 2 min drive home she had to hear them argue and complain how bored they were after everyone left and she said she just couldn't take it.

I have not responded yet because what I want to say and what I should say........well I will just leave it at that.

Ok your input here please......and thanks it's been a LONG week!!1
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NoMoreJuice! 05:20 PM 10-23-2015
I would send a simple reply about how the children have ample amounts of books, coloring, puzzles, and other such things to occupy their time, and if they choose not to utilize these resources we can't force them to. Boredom is a choice at their age.
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Ariana 05:27 PM 10-23-2015
Originally Posted by NoMoreJuice!:
I would send a simple reply about how the children have ample amounts of books, coloring, puzzles, and other such things to occupy their time, and if they choose not to utilize these resources we can't force them to. Boredom is a choice at their age.
Agree! I would say that at this age the children are quite capable of playing on their own and coming up with things to do without my intervention. It's unfortunate that you have to listen to your children complain but it's called "PARENTING"!! What is next for this parent? is she going to call you to help her out when her kids won't eat their broccoli at home? is that your fault too? Bizarre request honestly!
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daycare 06:07 PM 10-23-2015
What I want to say is this.

As we discussed this morning, sibling rivalry is always going to exist between these two, there is just not too much we can really do about that However, I do my best to make certain they respect one another while they are here.

While I understand that the kids are extremely bored and partly killing each other after the rest of the kids leave, you always have the choice of picking them up earlier to avoid this from happening.

I don't mind if they are here later, it's up to you if you want them to be here this late or not each night without playmates.

With the kids being age 5 and 6, I do expect for them to be able to entertain themselves during this time, but I can't force them to partake in the activities we offer. It is solely their choice if they choose not to do something and sit there bored.

what do you think? what would you change?
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Shell 06:29 PM 10-23-2015
Ugh! That is an obnoxious request!
I wouldn't get too wordy here, just let them know that it's your (and staff) clean up and prep time. No need for further explanation-
It's the same at centers, after school programs, etc.
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Unregistered 07:03 PM 10-23-2015
Maybe a bullet point outline of the day with the last section being Free Play. Let her know the children are free to play, should they choose to.

For the last 1/2 hour I would likely bring out something different that they seldom see to amuse them. It is however up to them, if they wish to explore it.
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Annalee 08:00 PM 10-23-2015
Originally Posted by daycare:
So all of my families have decided to pick up at 400-4:15pm but one. Which this all came about this month. Everyone is paying my 430 pick up rate but have been picking up early for whatever reason.

In past months, I normally close at 515, but was able to close at 445 most days and 430 on Friday. I just adjusted my times because everyone but this one family was not picking up at the same time and I was staying open an hour later just for them. that got old really quick.

So just when everyone was on board with similar pick up times, the rest of my DCP decide to pick up earlier....Yeah for me.

Well my last two kids that are here are normally here for about 20-30 minutes later than everyone else., sometimes longer. So we let them read books or play a CLEAN and quite activity like puzzles until its time to go home. My staff and I clean up while they wait to be picked up. These kids are 5 and 6. They are siblings and when everyone else is gone, these two fight each other non-stop.

I have not asked the parents to pick up any earlier, because I just adjusted my close time about a month ago and made them pick up earlier, because I know that the parents can. they work from home around the corner and I know for a fact they are done working around 4-4:30pm, but it was their choice to pay the MUCH higher rate to have the kids stay later, i am fine with that.

Well dcm comes to pick up and the kids start whining right away why did you take so long to get here we are super bored and want to go home early like everyone else. DCM looks at me. I said yeah everyone went home today around 4 today, so they haven't had any play partners for the last 45 min. The DCP are awesome, I love them to death. I am not complaining at all about the fact that they set their phone alarm and pick up right on the dot every day. Hey they pay for it so it's all good.

So here is where the issue comes up. DCM just text me asking if I can play with them when all of the other kids leave instead of clean up because the whole 2 min drive home she had to hear them argue and complain how bored they were after everyone left and she said she just couldn't take it.

I have not responded yet because what I want to say and what I should say........well I will just leave it at that.

Ok your input here please......and thanks it's been a LONG week!!1
The text back would have made me angry! My face is a tell-all for my clients. Not sure how to respond in text because I would have been very agitated, but my face would have said, "What?" to the point the clients would have new better than to say anything else

Clients are becoming like the ones you are talking about more than ever now and I have come to the conclusion I am not worrying so much anymore about being nice....many clients see "nice" as "negotiable"....I have a few clients right now that I have to be straight-forward with...and even that doesn't work and I have to then get "mean".. These parents never cease to amaze me!!!!!!
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KiddieCahoots 08:39 PM 10-23-2015
Talk about wringing out the sponge for every drop of water!

Age 5 & 6 is that fuzzy age of dc/sa that I don't like.

Maybe ask mom to supply you with their favorite activity for those times. I bet it's a tablet or something of that nature.
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KidGrind 10:13 PM 10-23-2015
Originally Posted by daycare:
So all of my families have decided to pick up at 400-4:15pm but one. Which this all came about this month. Everyone is paying my 430 pick up rate but have been picking up early for whatever reason.

In past months, I normally close at 515, but was able to close at 445 most days and 430 on Friday. I just adjusted my times because everyone but this one family was not picking up at the same time and I was staying open an hour later just for them. that got old really quick.

So just when everyone was on board with similar pick up times, the rest of my DCP decide to pick up earlier....Yeah for me.

Well my last two kids that are here are normally here for about 20-30 minutes later than everyone else., sometimes longer. So we let them read books or play a CLEAN and quite activity like puzzles until its time to go home. My staff and I clean up while they wait to be picked up. These kids are 5 and 6. They are siblings and when everyone else is gone, these two fight each other non-stop.

I have not asked the parents to pick up any earlier, because I just adjusted my close time about a month ago and made them pick up earlier, because I know that the parents can. they work from home around the corner and I know for a fact they are done working around 4-4:30pm, but it was their choice to pay the MUCH higher rate to have the kids stay later, i am fine with that.

Well dcm comes to pick up and the kids start whining right away why did you take so long to get here we are super bored and want to go home early like everyone else. DCM looks at me. I said yeah everyone went home today around 4 today, so they haven't had any play partners for the last 45 min. The DCP are awesome, I love them to death. I am not complaining at all about the fact that they set their phone alarm and pick up right on the dot every day. Hey they pay for it so it's all good.

So here is where the issue comes up. DCM just text me asking if I can play with them when all of the other kids leave instead of clean up because the whole 2 min drive home she had to hear them argue and complain how bored they were after everyone left and she said she just couldn't take it.

I have not responded yet because what I want to say and what I should say........well I will just leave it at that.

Ok your input here please......and thanks it's been a LONG week!!1
The last part of the day is child initiated play. They’re 5 and 6, very bright and capable to find multiple activities to keep themselves busy. Some of their options are…..(list multiple activities). One has to love siblings!

It is not your issue; it is hers.
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Josiegirl 03:50 AM 10-24-2015
Dear Dcm, maybe YOU could pick them up a little earlier and be their parent a little longer!!

That text would have sent me over the edge and I'd most likely cut their hours back too, not even offering them the choice of later hours anymore. Kids this age are notorious for getting bored and usually no matter what you offer them, it's still boring to them.
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sahm1225 06:19 AM 10-24-2015
Originally Posted by KidGrind:
The last part of the day is child initiated play. They’re 5 and 6, very bright and capable to find multiple activities to keep themselves busy. Some of their options are…..(list multiple activities). One has to love siblings!

It is not your issue; it is hers.
Say this! It turns it back to being her problem.
Her text would've really bugged me. I wouldn't change my entire routine because other families chose to pick up early and poor snowflakes have no one to entertain them!
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Crazy8 08:58 AM 10-24-2015
Originally Posted by daycare:
What I want to say is this.

As we discussed this morning, sibling rivalry is always going to exist between these two, there is just not too much we can really do about that However, I do my best to make certain they respect one another while they are here.

While I understand that the kids are extremely bored and partly killing each other after the rest of the kids leave, you always have the choice of picking them up earlier to avoid this from happening.

I don't mind if they are here later, it's up to you if you want them to be here this late or not each night without playmates.

With the kids being age 5 and 6, I do expect for them to be able to entertain themselves during this time, but I can't force them to partake in the activities we offer. It is solely their choice if they choose not to do something and sit there bored.

what do you think? what would you change?
Sorry, but I would not answer with this. Keep it short and sweet and don't bring their sibling rivalry into it and don't even mention the option of her picking up early, she KNOWS that is an option. I would simply answer that your scheduled activities for that time frame does not change regardless of how many children are here at that time. The activities available after 4pm (or whatever time you want to say) are ……….. and list them out. My daily schedule actually has 4:30 listed as "clean up time" - its the time children start putting things away and start packing up to go home. All children are gone by 5 here. If one goes home at 4:15 or if all but one goes home at 4:15 our schedule doesn't change.
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Unregistered 10:02 AM 10-24-2015
Originally Posted by sahm1225:
Say this! It turns it back to being her problem.
Her text would've really bugged me. I wouldn't change my entire routine because other families chose to pick up early and poor snowflakes have no one to entertain them!
I agree with this. I have a child that is the first to arrive and the last to leave. We are outdoors at the end of the day, and dck knows to entertain himself. Most days all of my dcks are gone by 3:30 (I close at 4). Dcm is a sahm so she knows she has the option to come earlier, just chooses not to. Dcm remarked one day that dck was the last one, and I replied that yes, the other children are gone by 3:30 but dcm continues to come at almost closing, which I have no problem with since dck learned to entertain himself while I start cleaning and closing up.
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mommyneedsadayoff 01:19 PM 10-24-2015
I wouldn't respond to the text. If she picks up next time and mentions something, just say that 4-5 is free play and clean up time for all the kids still here. They have X, Y, Z to choose from, but if they choose not to play, you cannot force them, so inevitably, that means their choice is boredom. As long as they are not fighting or being disruptive, it is a perfectly acceptable choice they can deal with until pick up.

I agree with above poster. She wants you to keep them busy, because she doesn't want to pick up early and keep them busy herself. Most likely, if she did start picking up earlier, they would go home and watch TV or play on a tablet, which is what they want to do, but the longer she withholds that option by keeping them with you, the longer time she gets during the evening of not having to deal with them before bed.
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lovemykidstoo 06:16 PM 10-24-2015
I'd put their whiney little butts to work. They can help clean up. Kids sure know how to play their parents don't they?
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Laurel 01:36 PM 10-25-2015
Originally Posted by KidGrind:
The last part of the day is child initiated play. They’re 5 and 6, very bright and capable to find multiple activities to keep themselves busy. Some of their options are…..(list multiple activities). One has to love siblings!

It is not your issue; it is hers.


I'd also probably have a bin of odds and ends for each of them that are something different than is usually out....just for my own sanity really.
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lizzlee 10:11 AM 10-26-2015
Originally Posted by lovemykidstoo:
I'd put their whiney little butts to work. They can help clean up. Kids sure know how to play their parents don't they?
This!!

My kids actually like to help clean up, they love to wipe surfaces with a a baby wipe, look for little bits of trash to carry the trash and they LOVE to vacuum with the dustbuster or the swiffer dust mop. I do have books and paper and crayons available at all times and sometimes I'll turn on a leapfrog show or something educational for 30 minutes at the end of the day. I don't entertain kids, I always tell my own children that it's good for them to be bored because it helps their brains learn to be creative and think new thoughts lol.
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daycare 11:27 AM 10-26-2015
see I told you that I didn't want to say to them what I was feeling...lol

I just told dcm today that the kids were given plenty of options, but I can't force them to play with the options given. I also told her that since the time changed as noted in her new contract, the new clean up time was now 4:00pm. she could either pick up earlier or allow the kids to learn to entertain themselves.

she responded with she thinks they are fighting because I am not giving them the attention that they need. I told her that I did have to separate them after all of the kids left because yes it's true that they fight with each other when it is only the two of them, we had talked about that before. So I separate them and give them individual activity to do and they can choose to do it or not.

I am thinking that at this point, I am going to just move the pick up time to 430 every day and be done with it. If they can't pick up at that time then they need to give notice.
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Preschool/daycare teacher 02:29 PM 10-26-2015
Wow. She accused you of not giving them the attention they need, so it's your fault they fight? What does she do at home when it's just the two siblings and she needs to fix dinner or clean up afterward? I seriously doubt she can spend all evening playing with them to prevent them from fighting. The issue is that they need to learn how to get along without adult intervention and constant entertainment. That accusation would have really gotten under my skin and I'd be tempted to term. I'd at least be looking for a replacement soon since dcm seems like she's going to pin blame on you for anything that doesn't go the way she wants and I'd imagine she'll be leaving soon. I would also be very tempted (although I'm too "nice" to actually do it probably), to say, "Since your children are bored for so long after the other children leave and it is a problem for you, I have came up with a solution. I am changing my closing time to 4:30 pm everyday now." And smile so sweetly while saying it.
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daycare 02:32 PM 10-26-2015
Originally Posted by Preschool/daycare teacher:
Wow. She accused you of not giving them the attention they need, so it's your fault they fight? What does she do at home when it's just the two siblings and she needs to fix dinner or clean up afterward? I seriously doubt she can spend all evening playing with them to prevent them from fighting. The issue is that they need to learn how to get along without adult intervention and constant entertainment. That accusation would have really gotten under my skin and I'd be tempted to term. I'd at least be looking for a replacement soon since dcm seems like she's going to pin blame on you for anything that doesn't go the way she wants and I'd imagine she'll be leaving soon. I would also be very tempted (although I'm too "nice" to actually do it probably), to say, "Since your children are bored for so long after the other children leave and it is a problem for you, I have came up with a solution. I am changing my closing time to 4:30 pm everyday now." And smile so sweetly while saying it.
Since your children are bored for so long after the other children leave and it is a problem for you, I have came up with a solution. I am changing my closing time to 4:30 pm everyday now." And smile so sweetly while saying it.

this is exactly how I am feeling.

I hardly ever deal with the dcm ever. In 3.5 years I may have seen her about 5 times. NOrmally dad is the one that deals with the kids and daycare. So DCD has been out of town for the last week and a half, comes back on thursday of this week.

I am right where you are with this whole situation. OVER IT... I am going to put the noitce out that effective Nov. 9th we will be closing at 430. So they have two weeks to need to figure it out.
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Unregistered 03:38 PM 10-26-2015
Originally Posted by Annalee:
many clients see "nice" as "negotiable"
Or, they see "nice" as "weak".
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Tags:sibling rivalry, siblings fighting
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