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Old 05-21-2014, 10:37 AM
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Tdhmom Tdhmom is offline
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Default I really thought I would start loving my job again...

And I don't. The set of twins I had that were trouble makers have been gone since last Friday. I thought for sure with them being gone I would start loving my job again. Because I'm back to my one set of 3 yr old twins. And I just don't. I constantly think of all the things I could be doing instead of being 'stuck' at home.

I hear "hey Heidi" at least 150 times a day...from the same kid. They want my constant attention, because that's what they get at home, while I still have my 3 kids here.

I had heard the parents as teachers teacher is quitting this year so it's available. I've inquired everywhere I need to so I can find out more information. I was going to work that and do the daycare until my youngest daughter starts school in 2 years and then just go to the PAT after that and quit daycare altogether, but the more I find out about PAT the more that's all I want to do. I want to give up daycare completely.

Of course, if I did that I would get the guilty conversation that I get from dcm. I tried getting a part time job at the hospital for evenings that I would only have to work 2 a week about a year ago when our insurance ran out (dh quit to become self employed) so we needed insurance, that's why I applied. I had no intentions on quitting daycare. I got the third degree from her...the fact that I would have 2 jobs, my husband would have cover me for a half an hour, on days that I worked, what makes me think he would want to do that, never seeing MY kids (yes this was on HER list), I would be tired, the list is quite extensive. But the fact that I was doing this for MY family never crossed her mind. It was how it was going to effect HER family.

I'm burnt out. I can't figure out a way to become unburnt I've tried making time for myself, taking time off, walking on the treadmill again. Nothing is working. And when morning comes I'm dreading it all over.

If you've made it this far, thank you. I just needed to get it off my chest. If you have any advice I'd love to hear it.
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Old 05-21-2014, 10:46 AM
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Annalee Annalee is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tdhmom View Post
And I don't. The set of twins I had that were trouble makers have been gone since last Friday. I thought for sure with them being gone I would start loving my job again. Because I'm back to my one set of 3 yr old twins. And I just don't. I constantly think of all the things I could be doing instead of being 'stuck' at home.

I hear "hey Heidi" at least 150 times a day...from the same kid. They want my constant attention, because that's what they get at home, while I still have my 3 kids here.

I had heard the parents as teachers teacher is quitting this year so it's available. I've inquired everywhere I need to so I can find out more information. I was going to work that and do the daycare until my youngest daughter starts school in 2 years and then just go to the PAT after that and quit daycare altogether, but the more I find out about PAT the more that's all I want to do. I want to give up daycare completely.

Of course, if I did that I would get the guilty conversation that I get from dcm. I tried getting a part time job at the hospital for evenings that I would only have to work 2 a week about a year ago when our insurance ran out (dh quit to become self employed) so we needed insurance, that's why I applied. I had no intentions on quitting daycare. I got the third degree from her...the fact that I would have 2 jobs, my husband would have cover me for a half an hour, on days that I worked, what makes me think he would want to do that, never seeing MY kids (yes this was on HER list), I would be tired, the list is quite extensive. But the fact that I was doing this for MY family never crossed her mind. It was how it was going to effect HER family.

I'm burnt out. I can't figure out a way to become unburnt I've tried making time for myself, taking time off, walking on the treadmill again. Nothing is working. And when morning comes I'm dreading it all over.

If you've made it this far, thank you. I just needed to get it off my chest. If you have any advice I'd love to hear it.
Not sure what to tell you....maybe rearrange your room, take a few personal days, make a list of pros/cons why you work in family child care.....I have to remind myself sometimes of why I started, how far I have come and how hard I have worked to get here....and I simply don't want to throw it away working for someone else.....I LOVE being my own boss....I can support my family, etc. I guess it is mind over matter but sometimes we create our own Happiness. Best wishes!
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Old 05-21-2014, 11:02 AM
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I go through these phases quite frequently. I then apply for jobs, go on interviews, and want to run home crying because I remember all the reasons I left work again to be self employed and be with my own kids. The only real relief I can offer as advice is to downsize again on daycare kids if you can. I made the decision not to take on a full time infant and instead took on a part time preschooler. Less money, yes, but more downtime with my own family. If you really can't do this anymore, don't worry about that selfish dcm- do what works for you!
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Old 05-21-2014, 11:20 AM
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:hugs: Sometimes you just have to make big changes.
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Old 05-21-2014, 11:22 AM
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Quit and do what you love! Why should a dcm dictate what you do? I understand feeling guilty, but if she had an opportunity to do something else to better herself and her family, I'm sure she'd drop you in a heartbeat. I don't mean that to be offensive, just that people are selfish and you need to do what works for YOU.

What is PAT?
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Old 05-21-2014, 11:23 AM
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Thank you both! My mind is just elsewhere right now. I know that if I go to work outside the home full time I'll miss out on a lot with my kids. It's just so hard. If I'm not "working" I'm still working because I have kids of my own I have to still care for. It just feels like I never leave my job. And never have anyone to talk to.

And then when the bad twins finally left I thought for sure I would get out of this slump but I haven't.

Thank you again for letting me vent!
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Old 05-21-2014, 11:25 AM
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EntropyControlSpecialist EntropyControlSpecialist is offline
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Sometimes it takes a couple of weeks for me to finally realize THAT DIFFICULT KID/PARENT IS NEVER COMING BACK AGAIN!!!! Perhaps this will be you?

If not, go ahead and quit and do what you want. It is YOUR life and only YOU can change what you don't like.
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Old 05-21-2014, 11:28 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by butterfly View Post
Quit and do what you love! Why should a dcm dictate what you do? I understand feeling guilty, but if she had an opportunity to do something else to better herself and her family, I'm sure she'd drop you in a heartbeat. I don't mean that to be offensive, just that people are selfish and you need to do what works for YOU.

What is PAT?
It's parents as teachers...the lady that used to do it in our district was the kindergarten teacher and is retiring. You have meetings once a month with all the kids ages 0-kindergarten and basically try to help parents get down to their childs level. Things they should be focusing on at what ages. And then once a year you do home visits with each child to make sure they are hitting the age appropriate milestones and if they fall behind they have a better chance of catching it early as opposed to when school starts. I'm sure I'm leaving tons out but it's a pretty sweet gig. You make your own hours AND get to be creative with your meetings (my favorite thing about my day..craft time )
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Old 05-21-2014, 11:29 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by EntropyControlSpecialist View Post
Sometimes it takes a couple of weeks for me to finally realize THAT DIFFICULT KID/PARENT IS NEVER COMING BACK AGAIN!!!! Perhaps this will be you?

If not, go ahead and quit and do what you want. It is YOUR life and only YOU can change what you don't like.
I think I am worried I'm going to be getting a phone call...can they come just for today? I have no one else!
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Old 05-21-2014, 11:33 AM
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Do whatever works for you. there is no way I would care about a DCMs opinion on my job after hours. I would be firm in saying "The decision is final, this is not up for discussion". Why not interview and then decide? We all have tough choices to make and you are right, it is hard when you have to make an income no matter what. Why not be happy and do something you love? There are plenty of great parents that are still connected to their kids while working outside the home. I would do it. You could always go back to daycare if you had to.....with new drama free families.
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Old 05-21-2014, 11:36 AM
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EntropyControlSpecialist EntropyControlSpecialist is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tdhmom View Post
I think I am worried I'm going to be getting a phone call...can they come just for today? I have no one else!
Practice over and over.."No, I am sorry but there are no spots available! "
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Old 05-21-2014, 11:37 AM
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spinnymarie spinnymarie is offline
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I totally get what you mean about never leaving work - when the DCK go home, I still have half the daycare left, only they call me mom

I did work outside of the home as teacher until two years ago, so for four years as a mom, and it was the hardest thing I ever had to do. And I even got to bring my kids to my own mother for day care. So, although I appreciated my time with the kids so much more, I actually cherished it TOO much (if that makes sense) - I was angry any time that ANYONE infringed on 'our time' since we got so little. In-laws visiting, I was angry; aunts/uncles/cousins/necessary trips, and I was so annoyed. And yet I also desperately needed some 'me' time that I was totally unwilling to take.

Just MY experience with why I chose to open a daycare - and I have to say it a lot of my issue is that having three young kids at home is HARD work no matter if you work with them or without them!

So, the point I guess of this very long post, is that that PAT job sounds amazing and you should definitely weigh your options
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Old 05-21-2014, 12:56 PM
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Thank you all!!!! Seriously this is my absolute favorite place to go whenever I need advice! You all are amazing and always are!!!
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Old 05-21-2014, 01:18 PM
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Blackcat31 Blackcat31 is offline
 
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What is PAT?
Parents as Teachers

http://www.parentsasteachers.org/
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