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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>How to term a kid that is a pain when you really like Mom
Unregistered 06:48 AM 07-20-2012
I love this mom, she is so sweet and kind but this kid is just too much. He has been here a year and it has been nothing but trouble.He is the oldest of my group(3) but acts much younger. He still talks like a baby, hits throws huge fits, and talks back. He was tough when he started but we excuses because he was adjusting. His brother was born 4 months later so his behavior was excused because of that. Now they have been moving, staying with grandma and trying to find their own place and again perhaps that is why he is such a pain. Either way I don't think I can take much more. His misbehavior are now being copied by the other kids. It is upsetting the whole dynamic.
So, I have have never termed before and I really like mom. How do you do this without coming across as a total witch?
So, I have have never termed before and I really like mom. How do you do this without coming across as a total witch?
Blackcat31 06:52 AM 07-20-2012
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
I love this mom, she is so sweet and kind but this kid is just too much. He has been here a year and it has been nothing but trouble.He is the oldest of my group(3) but acts much younger. He still talks like a baby, hits throws huge fits, and talks back. He was tough when he started but we excuses because he was adjusting. His brother was born 4 months later so his behavior was excused because of that. Now they have been moving, staying with grandma and trying to find their own place and again perhaps that is why he is such a pain. Either way I don't think I can take much more. His misbehavior are now being copied by the other kids. It is upsetting the whole dynamic.
So, I have have never termed before and I really like mom. How do you do this without coming across as a total witch?
I would simply say that his behavior has gotten to be more than I can manage during the day while still trying to maintain safety and quality care for the other kids. I love this mom, she is so sweet and kind but this kid is just too much. He has been here a year and it has been nothing but trouble.He is the oldest of my group(3) but acts much younger. He still talks like a baby, hits throws huge fits, and talks back. He was tough when he started but we excuses because he was adjusting. His brother was born 4 months later so his behavior was excused because of that. Now they have been moving, staying with grandma and trying to find their own place and again perhaps that is why he is such a pain. Either way I don't think I can take much more. His misbehavior are now being copied by the other kids. It is upsetting the whole dynamic.
So, I have have never termed before and I really like mom. How do you do this without coming across as a total witch?
If you prefer not to get into long drawn out explainations and would like to part on good terms since you generally like the family, I wouldn't say the child is bad, just say it is more than you can manage.
Kiki 06:54 AM 07-20-2012
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
I would simply say that his behavior has gotten to be more than I can manage during the day while still trying to maintain safety and quality care for the other kids.
If you prefer not to get into long drawn out explainations and would like to part on good terms since you generally like the family, I wouldn't say the child is bad, just say it is more than you can manage.
I would simply say that his behavior has gotten to be more than I can manage during the day while still trying to maintain safety and quality care for the other kids.
If you prefer not to get into long drawn out explainations and would like to part on good terms since you generally like the family, I wouldn't say the child is bad, just say it is more than you can manage.
Agree, and while it might be hard, you have to do what is best for you and your group as a whole, not an individual.
momma2girls 07:08 AM 07-20-2012
I once was told, before I started doing daycare myself from a previous daycare provider- If it's not the parents being rotten, it's the kids. I have thought and thought about this statement over and over. It is true!!!!
nanglgrl 09:03 AM 07-20-2012
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
I would simply say that his behavior has gotten to be more than I can manage during the day while still trying to maintain safety and quality care for the other kids.
If you prefer not to get into long drawn out explainations and would like to part on good terms since you generally like the family, I wouldn't say the child is bad, just say it is more than you can manage.
No matter how you put it the parent will hear "your child is bad" and they will get defensive or upset....ack, we can never win!I would simply say that his behavior has gotten to be more than I can manage during the day while still trying to maintain safety and quality care for the other kids.
If you prefer not to get into long drawn out explainations and would like to part on good terms since you generally like the family, I wouldn't say the child is bad, just say it is more than you can manage.
Blackcat31 09:25 AM 07-20-2012
Originally Posted by nanglgrl:
No matter how you put it the parent will hear "your child is bad" and they will get defensive or upset....ack, we can never win!
Dear ParentNo matter how you put it the parent will hear "your child is bad" and they will get defensive or upset....ack, we can never win!
This is written notice of termination of our child care services agreement.
At this time, I feel I am unable to provide the type of care Johnny needs.
He is an bright but very active 3 year old and with so mnay younger ones in care, I feel that I am not able to meet his needs properly.
The last day I am willing to provide care to you is July XX, 2012.
Thank you,
Provider
If a parent reads anything into that, then they are more than likely FULLY aware of what a PITA their kid is and you shouldn't have to feel bad for that.
Truly Scrumptious 10:05 AM 07-20-2012
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
Dear Parent
This is written notice of termination of our child care services agreement.
At this time, I feel I am unable to provide the type of care Johnny needs.
He is an bright but very active 3 year old and with so mnay younger ones in care, I feel that I am not able to meet his needs properly.
The last day I am willing to provide care to you is July XX, 2012.
Thank you,
Provider
If a parent reads anything into that, then they are more than likely FULLY aware of what a PITA their kid is and you shouldn't have to feel bad for that.
Perfect!....this is the exact wording I use as well, when faced with situations like this.Dear Parent
This is written notice of termination of our child care services agreement.
At this time, I feel I am unable to provide the type of care Johnny needs.
He is an bright but very active 3 year old and with so mnay younger ones in care, I feel that I am not able to meet his needs properly.
The last day I am willing to provide care to you is July XX, 2012.
Thank you,
Provider
If a parent reads anything into that, then they are more than likely FULLY aware of what a PITA their kid is and you shouldn't have to feel bad for that.
Ariana 10:11 AM 07-20-2012
I just termed a child that was a total PITA eventhough I liked the parents a lot. It's unfortunate but her behavior was disrupting everything. I basically told them about the behavior, thanked them for their respect during our time together but I could no longer handle the child and she was disrupting the other children. I was as honest as possible without blaming the child. In the end I just said that there is nothing you can do about personality differences and wished them all the best.
Unfortunately they were still pretty angry and we didn't end up remaining in contact at all.
Unfortunately they were still pretty angry and we didn't end up remaining in contact at all.