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mamamanda 09:33 AM 02-22-2018
So... that wonderful topic again Dcb is 2 years 5 mo. He is consistently using the potty 4-5 times a day. Sometimes he's still dry, sometimes not. He doesn't tell me when he has to potty. Just walks into the bathroom & does his business. I of course know he's in there b/c I'm supervising...I just mean he doesn't ask but handles it himself.

He just started doing it consistently this week. Problem is this kiddo is extremely strong willed & wants every single thing done his way. I've been trying to follow him in b/c he sometimes misses & hits the floor if he doesn't scoot back far enough or he tries to climb on the sink to get to the tooth brushes. (He's obsessed with brushing.) Also, the toothpaste is a potential disaster & he attempts to climb for that as well... potential safety issue.

However if I help him onto the toilet he screams I do it myself repeatedly, climbs off the toilet & back on again & still ends up not far enough back. When I insist upon helping he screams & refuses to pee.

If I stay in the room to be sure he doesn't climb he cries that he needs to be by himself to potty. Oddly enough he's always asking another kid to go in with him. I have to redirect each time.
How do you handle their quest for independece in this area? He obviously understands what he is doing, pretty much knows when he needs to go, etc. But his refusal for assistance is causing a lot of disruption to the day.
Finally, he wants to"pee" every time someone else uses the potty. I believe it's a tactic to attempt to go with them, but it ends in a meltdown Everytime.
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Blackcat31 09:50 AM 02-22-2018
Originally Posted by mamamanda:
So... that wonderful topic again Dcb is 2 years 5 mo. He is consistently using the potty 4-5 times a day. Sometimes he's still dry, sometimes not. He doesn't tell me when he has to potty. Just walks into the bathroom & does his business. I of course know he's in there b/c I'm supervising...I just mean he doesn't ask but handles it himself.

He just started doing it consistently this week. Problem is this kiddo is extremely strong willed & wants every single thing done his way. I've been trying to follow him in b/c he sometimes misses & hits the floor if he doesn't scoot back far enough or he tries to climb on the sink to get to the tooth brushes. (He's obsessed with brushing.) Also, the toothpaste is a potential disaster & he attempts to climb for that as well... potential safety issue.

However if I help him onto the toilet he screams I do it myself repeatedly, climbs off the toilet & back on again & still ends up not far enough back. When I insist upon helping he screams & refuses to pee.

If I stay in the room to be sure he doesn't climb he cries that he needs to be by himself to potty. Oddly enough he's always asking another kid to go in with him. I have to redirect each time.
How do you handle their quest for independece in this area? He obviously understands what he is doing, pretty much knows when he needs to go, etc. But his refusal for assistance is causing a lot of disruption to the day.
Finally, he wants to"pee" every time someone else uses the potty. I believe it's a tactic to attempt to go with them, but it ends in a meltdown Everytime.
I don't see this having anything to do with potty training really. I see it as an issue with following directions and understanding that YOU are the boss not DCB.

I wouldn't even discuss it or ask to help. Simply accompany him to the bathroom and let him do what he can independently (undressing etc) but scooch him back on to the toilet where YOU want him to be.

If he protests tell him "this is the way we do it. You don't have to like it but it is how it is done here. period. You can either go or don't go but this is how you WILL sit."

Just don't let him run the show... you are in charge and nothing in the scenario you posted requires discussion in length about it. It is what it is. period.

If he continues to have issues with it, conference with the parents...not so much about doing things this or that way but about listening to Miss Manda and doing what she says. period. 2.5 is way too young to think he gets any say in any of that...unless he's cleaning your bathroom from top to bottom before going home. Then he should get a say in it.
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Ariana 10:19 AM 02-22-2018
Start getting him to clean it up when he misses and makes mistakes. Then you can say “do you want me to help you so you don’t have an accident?” If he refuses get him the tools to clean it up himself. Right now there are no consequences for the accidents so they don’t bother him.
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