Daycare.com Forum
Parents and Guardians Forum>I Don't Think This Is Normal?
Unregistered 10:06 PM 03-31-2014
Hello! I'm looking for some advice. My daughter is 14 months and has been in an in-home daycare since 3 months. As she gets older I am getting a little concerned about the care she is receiving. Often times when I go to pick her up the provider is sitting on the couch in her living room watching tv while my daughter is in the playroom with a baby gate up. Sometimes she is by herself and sometimes there is another child in there, and then typically the rest of the kids are downstairs in another room. I don't expect her to have her eyes on my child every minute of the day, but I would love to see her interacting with her more.
She has been doing daycare for like 30 years, so I hate to question her methods. Last week we picked our daughter up one day and she a was laying on the ground in the playroom and was obviously not feeling well.
It concerned me that the provider didn't even know she had stopped playing and was laying flat on the ground. When we got her home she had a 102 temp. The provider said she hadn't felt warm all day.
I feel like the constant tv watching probably isn't normal and we should seek out another place. Am I being over-paranoid?
Thank you!
She has been doing daycare for like 30 years, so I hate to question her methods. Last week we picked our daughter up one day and she a was laying on the ground in the playroom and was obviously not feeling well.
It concerned me that the provider didn't even know she had stopped playing and was laying flat on the ground. When we got her home she had a 102 temp. The provider said she hadn't felt warm all day.
I feel like the constant tv watching probably isn't normal and we should seek out another place. Am I being over-paranoid?
Thank you!
Josiegirl 02:54 AM 04-01-2014
NO you are NOT being paranoid! Find someone else asap! That's not the way a quality daycare should be caring for your child.
EntropyControlSpecialist 05:57 AM 04-01-2014
That is not providing quality care. I would give my 2 weeks notice and find someplace better.
Mister Sir Husband 06:07 AM 04-01-2014
I agree.. in my opinion a provider should only be watching tv if its with the kids, and an educational/learning type show.. and maybe just for a half hour or so. If your paying someone to park your child somewhere while they watch tv I would definitely find another provider. She should be interacting with and playing with the kids. And even if your child was left in another room, assuming your states regulations actually allow this, they should be checked on often enough that a fever wouldn't be unnoticed by the provider.
mia 06:13 AM 04-01-2014
I fully agree NOT NORMAL ..... give your notice and get another provider......
Leigh 06:52 AM 04-01-2014
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
Hello! I'm looking for some advice. My daughter is 14 months and has been in an in-home daycare since 3 months. As she gets older I am getting a little concerned about the care she is receiving. Often times when I go to pick her up the provider is sitting on the couch in her living room watching tv while my daughter is in the playroom with a baby gate up. Sometimes she is by herself and sometimes there is another child in there, and then typically the rest of the kids are downstairs in another room. I don't expect her to have her eyes on my child every minute of the day, but I would love to see her interacting with her more.
She has been doing daycare for like 30 years, so I hate to question her methods. Last week we picked our daughter up one day and she a was laying on the ground in the playroom and was obviously not feeling well.
It concerned me that the provider didn't even know she had stopped playing and was laying flat on the ground. When we got her home she had a 102 temp. The provider said she hadn't felt warm all day.
I feel like the constant tv watching probably isn't normal and we should seek out another place. Am I being over-paranoid?
Thank you!
I'd like to know how a daycare provider can find the TIME to watch TV! First, the fever: I had a child last week who was fine all day, woke him up from nap for an early pickup, and he had a fever. They have to start sometime-I wouldn't worry about the provider not noticing the fever.Hello! I'm looking for some advice. My daughter is 14 months and has been in an in-home daycare since 3 months. As she gets older I am getting a little concerned about the care she is receiving. Often times when I go to pick her up the provider is sitting on the couch in her living room watching tv while my daughter is in the playroom with a baby gate up. Sometimes she is by herself and sometimes there is another child in there, and then typically the rest of the kids are downstairs in another room. I don't expect her to have her eyes on my child every minute of the day, but I would love to see her interacting with her more.
She has been doing daycare for like 30 years, so I hate to question her methods. Last week we picked our daughter up one day and she a was laying on the ground in the playroom and was obviously not feeling well.
It concerned me that the provider didn't even know she had stopped playing and was laying flat on the ground. When we got her home she had a 102 temp. The provider said she hadn't felt warm all day.
I feel like the constant tv watching probably isn't normal and we should seek out another place. Am I being over-paranoid?
Thank you!
How have you felt for these last 11 months about the care your daughter has received? I would not park myself in front of the TV at pick up time, but about 5:00 every day, we have everything picked up and start to wind down and get the kids ready to go home. I'm not doing my "usual" when parents arrive. I'm usually sitting on the floor with the kids doing something calm (reading a book, practicing numbers) to try to get them ready for the transition. What I am saying is that the TV watching COULD be a pick up time activity.
As far as interacting with your daughter, I don't feel that constant interaction is a good thing. Kids need to learn to play on their own and with others their own age-a lot of good learning goes on then. Kids should not be ignored, but I wouldn't want the provider to constantly direct and participate in kid activities.
Having your daughter in a separate room with a baby gate to "lock" her in is what would make me pull her from the daycare. I know a LOT of providers don't let kids leave the toy room, but I would not be OK with that. I use the baby gate with littles to keep them safe while I run to use the bathroom, not to get them out of my hair.
drseuss 07:58 AM 04-01-2014
Your daughter is not getting the attention she needs and deserves. Time to find a provider whose heart is in it.
butterfly 12:44 PM 04-01-2014
Ok, don't flame me but... On the flip side... when are you picking this child up? Are you arriving on time? Is she the last one there every day when you pick up?
When I only have a child or two left here, SOMETIMES I do sit down and take a bit of a break. Some days are absolutely non stop and it's my chance to catch a breath and get a break before I start my evening routine with my family. Especially if the parent is bordering a late pick up consistently. I don't agree with being in a separate room from the child and being parked infront of the tv... I have sat down with the last child and turned on a movie to just decompress for the last few minutes. This in no way is an indicator of my typical day with the kids.
But it comes down to comfort and if you feel that your child isn't being cared for properly, you need to find new care and ASAP!
When I only have a child or two left here, SOMETIMES I do sit down and take a bit of a break. Some days are absolutely non stop and it's my chance to catch a breath and get a break before I start my evening routine with my family. Especially if the parent is bordering a late pick up consistently. I don't agree with being in a separate room from the child and being parked infront of the tv... I have sat down with the last child and turned on a movie to just decompress for the last few minutes. This in no way is an indicator of my typical day with the kids.
But it comes down to comfort and if you feel that your child isn't being cared for properly, you need to find new care and ASAP!
saved4always 03:21 PM 04-01-2014
You are right to be concerned. Your childcare provider should not be constantly watching tv instead of caring for the kids. I did childcare in my home for years. The only time the tv was on was for the kids to watch a video or show. TV was at a minimum and only for the kids. And I was always in the same area with the kids. I didn't keep them behind a gate away from me.
Unregistered 05:02 PM 04-01-2014
Thank you all for your replies. And valid question about getting there later.I am actually one of the first to pick up their child. I got there today and she says hello from the couch but doesn't even get up. I went to the playroom to get her, and was at least happy to see another kid (1st grader) in there with her. The rest of the kids were downstairs playing.
We will continue our search for a new provider. Thanks for letting me "talk" it out.
We will continue our search for a new provider. Thanks for letting me "talk" it out.
saved4always 05:58 PM 04-01-2014
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
Thank you all for your replies. And valid question about getting there later.I am actually one of the first to pick up their child. I got there today and she says hello from the couch but doesn't even get up. I went to the playroom to get her, and was at least happy to see another kid (1st grader) in there with her. The rest of the kids were downstairs playing.
We will continue our search for a new provider. Thanks for letting me "talk" it out.
Wow. Kinda sounds like she doesn't want to be bothered. I always greeted all my parents at the door and discussed the day with them. Sounds like you are making the right decision looking for a more caring provider.Thank you all for your replies. And valid question about getting there later.I am actually one of the first to pick up their child. I got there today and she says hello from the couch but doesn't even get up. I went to the playroom to get her, and was at least happy to see another kid (1st grader) in there with her. The rest of the kids were downstairs playing.
We will continue our search for a new provider. Thanks for letting me "talk" it out.
Liliya 05:36 AM 04-02-2014
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
Thank you all for your replies. And valid question about getting there later.I am actually one of the first to pick up their child. I got there today and she says hello from the couch but doesn't even get up. I went to the playroom to get her, and was at least happy to see another kid (1st grader) in there with her. The rest of the kids were downstairs playing.
We will continue our search for a new provider. Thanks for letting me "talk" it out.
Hello from the couch? Really? This is so rude! Thank you all for your replies. And valid question about getting there later.I am actually one of the first to pick up their child. I got there today and she says hello from the couch but doesn't even get up. I went to the playroom to get her, and was at least happy to see another kid (1st grader) in there with her. The rest of the kids were downstairs playing.
We will continue our search for a new provider. Thanks for letting me "talk" it out.
Wonder why children are in separate rooms? I am sure you need to see/hear children all the time!
debbiedoeszip 06:41 AM 04-02-2014
From the perspective of both a parent who had had their child in daycare and as a former daycare provider, this is really poor care. I'd find someone else ASAP. She sounds like she may be burnt out (and possibly in need of a career change?). Good luck with everything!
suzymom 06:38 AM 04-03-2014
When I did daycare,I used baby gates,but I was in the room with them,so they would not go in kitchen area.You definitely need a new provider with fewer children in her care.And tell her why.She may truly not be aware that this isn't cool with you.Too many kids probably and she should have a helper or 2 .
Play Care 10:14 AM 04-03-2014
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
Thank you all for your replies. And valid question about getting there later.I am actually one of the first to pick up their child. I got there today and she says hello from the couch but doesn't even get up. I went to the playroom to get her, and was at least happy to see another kid (1st grader) in there with her. The rest of the kids were downstairs playing.
We will continue our search for a new provider. Thanks for letting me "talk" it out.
Sooooo, how can she supervise them from upstairs? Thank you all for your replies. And valid question about getting there later.I am actually one of the first to pick up their child. I got there today and she says hello from the couch but doesn't even get up. I went to the playroom to get her, and was at least happy to see another kid (1st grader) in there with her. The rest of the kids were downstairs playing.
We will continue our search for a new provider. Thanks for letting me "talk" it out.
Not normal, or okay. It sounds like an accident waiting to happen.
Unregistered 12:45 PM 04-03-2014
I have at times when there is only my son and another child put a show on really low like the doctors or something like that, not to even watch but to tune out background noise when parents come to pick up so he does not get woken up by louder voiced parents, or children screaming in excitement kind of thing.
I am not watching it, but playing with the kiddo who is awake (14 months old). I don't like gates but have used them on occasions for safety reasons (prevent climbing tables if I am in an area with the kids. If kiddos are repeatedly moving toys into non-toy areas and I am not having success with getting them to keep them in the areas they can play with them in (But I always give them a long rope before I result to gates), but never for neglect. I never get to watch a show unless everyone is asleep. I treat my business like I am at work. If the kids are sleeping I am still checking them every 10 min.
I have also had to use a gate to keep a school age child with a behavior disorder away from the younger kids so they would not get injured (which reminds me I should get workman's comp insurance for kids that are physically assaulting just in case).
Sometimes gates are used to allow school age children to play with smaller toys in a room and the younger kiddos are with me to prevent choking.
The point is you have to see and be able to hear them and gates used inappropriately is just like putting someone in a jail cell in my opinion.
I am not watching it, but playing with the kiddo who is awake (14 months old). I don't like gates but have used them on occasions for safety reasons (prevent climbing tables if I am in an area with the kids. If kiddos are repeatedly moving toys into non-toy areas and I am not having success with getting them to keep them in the areas they can play with them in (But I always give them a long rope before I result to gates), but never for neglect. I never get to watch a show unless everyone is asleep. I treat my business like I am at work. If the kids are sleeping I am still checking them every 10 min.
I have also had to use a gate to keep a school age child with a behavior disorder away from the younger kids so they would not get injured (which reminds me I should get workman's comp insurance for kids that are physically assaulting just in case).
Sometimes gates are used to allow school age children to play with smaller toys in a room and the younger kiddos are with me to prevent choking.
The point is you have to see and be able to hear them and gates used inappropriately is just like putting someone in a jail cell in my opinion.
Unregistered 07:03 AM 04-04-2014
Thanks again everyone for your responses! We found another place and we told our current provider this morning that we were going somewhere else. She started crying - I feel awful 
mountainside13 06:47 PM 04-07-2014
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
Thanks again everyone for your responses! We found another place and we told our current provider this morning that we were going somewhere else. She started crying - I feel awful
Good for you! You did the right thing for your little peanut and your family!!!! Try not to feel bad about her! Thanks again everyone for your responses! We found another place and we told our current provider this morning that we were going somewhere else. She started crying - I feel awful
NightOwl 08:52 PM 04-07-2014
No don't feel bad. She probably does love your child, just had poor business practices.
Unregistered 11:10 AM 06-09-2014
Wow, that's horrible. Not only would I remove my child ASAP but I would even make sure other parents were aware of this, and I'd be looking into what constitutes neglect in my state, as I might report such behavior.