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just_peachy 01:31 PM 04-11-2013
Does feeling "touched-out" ever affect your "relationship" with your significant other? Honestly I'm feeling lately like that's the hardest part of the job... HATE that feeling. 
Michelle 01:35 PM 04-11-2013
Originally Posted by just_peachy:
Does feeling "touched-out" ever affect your "relationship" with your significant other? Honestly I'm feeling lately like that's the hardest part of the job... HATE that feeling.
it does't affect myself and my dh but when I feel I need a break from constant babies touching me, sitting on me etc. I just take a 5 minute break in another room where i can still see them. Does feeling "touched-out" ever affect your "relationship" with your significant other? Honestly I'm feeling lately like that's the hardest part of the job... HATE that feeling.
I know exactly what you mean..
crazydaycarelady 01:47 PM 04-11-2013
Yes, this happens to me also, even in other ways.
The other night after work he turned on music and I just needed quiet.
By the end of the day and by the end of the week it is even worse, but I am just plain worn out of touching, talking, coddling, listening, and I find I don't want to do it for hubby either.
The other night after work he turned on music and I just needed quiet.
By the end of the day and by the end of the week it is even worse, but I am just plain worn out of touching, talking, coddling, listening, and I find I don't want to do it for hubby either.
Evansmom 01:48 PM 04-11-2013
Yes, I do. And my DH complains about it but honestly some days I just have no interest, I've been carrying kids, cuddling my son, having little ones on my lap, being talked to and talking constantly and I have no interest in anything by the end of the day but being left alone.
I know I have sensory issues though, so I always chalked up mine to sensory overload which is basically what it feels like.
I know I have sensory issues though, so I always chalked up mine to sensory overload which is basically what it feels like.
Blackcat31 01:50 PM 04-11-2013
Originally Posted by just_peachy:
Does feeling "touched-out" ever affect your "relationship" with your significant other? Honestly I'm feeling lately like that's the hardest part of the job... HATE that feeling.
Yes! Does feeling "touched-out" ever affect your "relationship" with your significant other? Honestly I'm feeling lately like that's the hardest part of the job... HATE that feeling.
This very subject is often a source of contention or a sore spot between DH and I.
By the time I get home from work, I really want to have a bubble of personal space around me that is MUCH MUCH larger than DH is okay with.
We don't necessary argue about it but I know it is something that bothers him a lot.
I am not by nature a very touchy-feely person and DH is so by the time my work day is over my allotted amount of "feely-ness" is pretty much exhausted.
My DH is self-employed and works at home. Alone. He has no one other than our dog to speak to during the day. He comes into daycare every afternoon to help out at lunch time and to get some socialization.
I am self-employed in a world where EVERYONE constantly has their hands on me and their conversations directed toward me.
DH and I struggle to balance those differences.
EntropyControlSpecialist 01:58 PM 04-11-2013
Originally Posted by Evansmom:
Yes, I do. And my DH complains about it but honestly some days I just have no interest, I've been carrying kids, cuddling my son, having little ones on my lap, being talked to and talking constantly and I have no interest in anything by the end of the day but being left alone.
I know I have sensory issues though, so I always chalked up mine to sensory overload which is basically what it feels like.
This is how I was/am. I get extremely overstimulated. I try to avoid seeing anyone/going anywhere as much as possible after I close each night and I ALSO pick 1 day each weekend to go no where and just try to relax to unwind.Yes, I do. And my DH complains about it but honestly some days I just have no interest, I've been carrying kids, cuddling my son, having little ones on my lap, being talked to and talking constantly and I have no interest in anything by the end of the day but being left alone.
I know I have sensory issues though, so I always chalked up mine to sensory overload which is basically what it feels like.
MarinaVanessa 02:00 PM 04-11-2013
Here too. A few days a week DH watched the kids and I lock myself in the bathroom to take a bubbly bath and stay in there for at least an hour. I take a glass of wine with me and a good book and just relax and decompress. This usually helps.
Now that I'm preggers and can't drink wine I pour cranberry juice into my wine glass so that at least I can pretend that it's wine
.
Being left alone with nobody around and no noise or interruptions helps me soothe. Without it I absolutely do not want to be messed with.
Now that I'm preggers and can't drink wine I pour cranberry juice into my wine glass so that at least I can pretend that it's wine
. Being left alone with nobody around and no noise or interruptions helps me soothe. Without it I absolutely do not want to be messed with.
Evansmom 02:56 PM 04-11-2013
I don't know about everyone else but I seem to also link this to me being introverted. I'm really awkwardly introverted too and having to be so expressive all day to clients and kids just drains me. I literally have days where all I want to do is dig a nice cool dark quiet hole and sit in it . But probably MarinaVanessa's suggestion of the warm bubble bath is more socially acceptable. 
. But probably MarinaVanessa's suggestion of the warm bubble bath is more socially acceptable.
crazydaycarelady 03:08 PM 04-11-2013
I am also mentally drained by the end of the day. I know that seems weird since I am not doing calculus or anything, but it is just the constant talking and answering questions that exhaust me. All I really want to do at he end of the day is be alone and read a book.
just_peachy 03:08 PM 04-11-2013
I like the hole idea! crazydaycarelady, yes I can relate to that! I have lots of trigger phrases too. Like if DH innocently asks me what's for dinner or if I've seen where something is, I seriously have to fight the urge to kick him where it hurts! I also hate "you should..." "it's easy, just..." etc etc. Gah!
We are going to the beach at the end of the month. Apparently not a moment too soon.
crazydaycarelady, yes I can relate to that! I have lots of trigger phrases too. Like if DH innocently asks me what's for dinner or if I've seen where something is, I seriously have to fight the urge to kick him where it hurts! I also hate "you should..." "it's easy, just..." etc etc. Gah!We are going to the beach at the end of the month. Apparently not a moment too soon.
just_peachy 03:10 PM 04-11-2013
Originally Posted by crazydaycarelady:
I am also mentally drained by the end of the day. I know that seems weird since I am not doing calculus or anything, but it is just the constant talking and answering questions that exhaust me. All I really want to do at he end of the day is be alone and read a book.
I am also mentally drained by the end of the day. I know that seems weird since I am not doing calculus or anything, but it is just the constant talking and answering questions that exhaust me. All I really want to do at he end of the day is be alone and read a book.
I once read that mental work is physically more draining than manual labor. I could see that! My DH is a machinist who is now home from work doing yard work, so I dare not tell him that. Although I want to!
Play Care 03:20 PM 04-11-2013
Originally Posted by crazydaycarelady:
I am also mentally drained by the end of the day. I know that seems weird since I am not doing calculus or anything, but it is just the constant talking and answering questions that exhaust me. All I really want to do at he end of the day is be alone and read a book.
I am also mentally drained by the end of the day. I know that seems weird since I am not doing calculus or anything, but it is just the constant talking and answering questions that exhaust me. All I really want to do at he end of the day is be alone and read a book.
I feel bad, but sometimes I head up to bed as soon as our kids are in bed just so I won't have to talk to DH. And I actually DO love/like the man!!
Hunni Bee 03:22 PM 04-11-2013
I sit in my car for at least 20 minutes at the end of each day just to de-stimulate. My hubby usually wants to play/hug and most days (especially since I've been pregnant) I can't handle it right away.
I have to remind myself too that he spends his nights completely alone in a bakery and his days alone at home. Well at least he'll have a lots of babbly, drooly company soon.
I have to remind myself too that he spends his nights completely alone in a bakery and his days alone at home. Well at least he'll have a lots of babbly, drooly company soon.
LoraJenkins 03:26 PM 04-11-2013
I can SO relate to this topic! I not only have the DCKs constantly on me but as soon as the last one is down for nap, the cats climb on me too!!!! Some days I feel like everyone's jungle-gym and would rather not "cuddle" with Hubby. What helps me is to take a mini-vacation once a month. We get on the Harley as soon as possible on a Friday evening and just go....not coming back until Sunday night. Usually we head to the coast. It gets me out of my house and allows me & the hubby to reconnect. It saved our marriage...lol
MyNana23 03:40 PM 04-11-2013
I have the same "problem"...I'm totally touched out by the end of the day/week...I like to be alone, no touching, no talking...LOL! I have a glass of wine alone and chill out for an hour or so. THEN, I can chat if necessary...dh and I go out on Saturdays alone and have lunch, shop and just chill ..
Since menopause I'm not that interested in a lot of "touching" from ANYONE, but when we have time to just relax together, we have a nice time and neither of us is concerned with what happens in any other way...LOL!
Since menopause I'm not that interested in a lot of "touching" from ANYONE, but when we have time to just relax together, we have a nice time and neither of us is concerned with what happens in any other way...LOL!
bunnyslippers 04:31 PM 04-11-2013
I have the same problem. I can't tell you how many times I have told my husband to leave me alone because I need my own personal space. It is an occupational hazard.
LaLa1923 07:32 PM 04-11-2013
I guess I'm the odd one out! lol I can't wait to see him so we can catch up about our day. He always calls me at least once so we can chat.
However, on the weekends I do like my alone time at some point. I have locked myself in our room....working on "daycare stuff"
However, on the weekends I do like my alone time at some point. I have locked myself in our room....working on "daycare stuff"
blandino 07:39 PM 04-11-2013
I am unmarried & not dating anyone - so that aspect isn't an issue at this time. But I will tell you, that I am CONSTANTLY shooing my poor dogs away when I get home. I just want to sit uninterrupted for 30 minutes. Everytime they come up to me I catch myself thinking "Now someone wants something else from me". I feel so bad for them, but I just want some alone time.
JSBaker 08:11 PM 04-11-2013
Yes, personal space becomes a bit sacred when you have been pulled and tugged on all day!
blandino 08:40 PM 04-11-2013
Originally Posted by Hunni Bee:
I sit in my car for at least 20 minutes at the end of each day just to de-stimulate. My hubby usually wants to play/hug and most days (especially since I've been pregnant) I can't handle it right away.
I have to remind myself too that he spends his nights completely alone in a bakery and his days alone at home. Well at least he'll have a lots of babbly, drooly company soon.
I do that. I sit in the driveway, and check all my websites on my phone, and just decompress for a while.I sit in my car for at least 20 minutes at the end of each day just to de-stimulate. My hubby usually wants to play/hug and most days (especially since I've been pregnant) I can't handle it right away.
I have to remind myself too that he spends his nights completely alone in a bakery and his days alone at home. Well at least he'll have a lots of babbly, drooly company soon.
Meyou 02:35 AM 04-12-2013
I tell my kids and dh that there is noone allowed in my bubble and I'm not taking requests for 30 minutes after my work day ends most of the time. I NEED it. I'm totally fine for the rest of the night once I have that bubble time.
SilverSabre25 04:46 AM 04-12-2013
Ooohhh, yes I experience this as well. Add into it my own two young children and I'm frequently touched out. DH doesn't get it. he's finally started to get used to the fact, but it still bugs him a lot.
lovemykidstoo 05:48 AM 04-12-2013
Ahh definately. As I've mentioned other places here, my husband has been unemployed for the past year, so I'm about ready to shoot myself. I love him to death, but drives me nuts when I finally get all the kids to sleep, make my lunch, turn my shows on and here he comes and plops next to me and wants to have "us time". Just to watch a show or talk. I told him I've been talking all morning, I want to just fall into a stupid tv show. Then one night, I went out to our front porch to relax and all of a sudden he pops his head out the door and said "found ya". Thought that would be his last day on earth!! We store our 29 foot camper within a mile of our house, so there has been times when the weather has been nice that I've gone over there and sat in the camper and read a book or did a puzzle and told him I was out shopping. bwahaha!!!
Hazel 06:42 AM 04-12-2013
Oh yes! When I'm done for the day I seriously like to be left alone. When my daughter is home (not at her dads) I do everything I can (cuddle, play, snuggle up and watch a movie) but when she's not here I have a huge issue.. I'm always telling my fiancée not to hang on me, lay on me ect! And he's not an overly affectionate person to begin with, so I feel TERRIBLE!