Update on DCG I Posted About Last Week☹

[Valerie928]

I had posted about my dcg almost 2 that is very aggressive towards her parents....Well, today has been terrible. She has been showing aggression towards my other dcg who is 3. It's all unprovoked. Dcg 2 is throwing toys at dcg 3, hitting her and taking anything she has from her. This is new and honestly I am at the end of my rope. I can't have aggression in my home.
How would you all deal with this? Right now I want to term and move on.

[Snowmom]

Well, I can say that if one child was making our environment unsafe for others, that child would be going home.

[Ariana]

I don’t know how many kids you have but she needs to be watched like a hawk a lot more! If you are doing something where you can’t do that she needs to go in a play yard. I only have 5 kids and I cannot imagine a scenario where another child would be able to get away with this on a daily basis.

If this is not possible then terming would be the alternative.

[knoxmomof2]

If you want to term, term. I tend to be a glutton for punishment and try to overcome the issue... Lol.... It just adds to my toolbox for future issues. Generally, kids act out unprovoked because they either can't express themselves and they get angry or something is happening or changing in their World that is upsetting them (parents divorce, moving, death of close family member, moved to big kid bed, etc). So, if you want to figure it out, ask yourself if she's struggling to communicate. If she is, you watch her closely and step in when you notice her getting frustrated, then you teach her a word like "help", "up", "more" to use to ask for assistance.

If that's not the issue, then she's acting out due to changes or issues in her life and for that you just have to keep her close and watch her closely in order to prevent her hurting others. You can also ask Mom and Dad, have there been any big changes for her lately? If so, there might be something they can do to ease the transition or something. I have a 2.5 year old here who started crying at drop off. Of course the parents are looking at me and questioning it. They said no changes at home, but we both have noticed she keeps saying she's "baby Susie" and insisting she's not a big girl, she's a baby. Well, I just started an infant 2 months ago. So, my theory is that she's jealous and struggling with the idea that she's not a baby anymore. So, I started talking up what she gets to do since she's a big girl and I encouraged Mom to talk her through their morning routine in order to prepare her ahead of time that she's coming to my house that day. The problem disappeared within a week. As I told Mom, these guys are more complex than we give them credit for sometimes.

Either way, close supervision while you figure out the reason. Put her somewhere separate when you aren't able to directly watch her and be ready to step in to prevent owies. Remind her nice hands, we don't hurt others. At 2 or older, I have them sit on a separate rug with a toy for a bit afterwards if they prove that they can't be nice friends by attempting to hurt others.

Good luck to you!!

[Valerie928]

Originally Posted by knoxmomof2

If you want to term, term. I tend to be a glutton for punishment and try to overcome the issue... Lol.... It just adds to my toolbox for future issues. Generally, kids act out unprovoked because they either can't express themselves and they get angry or something is happening or changing in their World that is upsetting them (parents divorce, moving, death of close family member, moved to big kid bed, etc). So, if you want to figure it out, ask yourself if she's struggling to communicate. If she is, you watch her closely and step in when you notice her getting frustrated, then you teach her a word like "help", "up", "more" to use to ask for assistance.

If that's not the issue, then she's acting out due to changes or issues in her life and for that you just have to keep her close and watch her closely in order to prevent her hurting others. You can also ask Mom and Dad, have there been any big changes for her lately? If so, there might be something they can do to ease the transition or something. I have a 2.5 year old here who started crying at drop off. Of course the parents are looking at me and questioning it. They said no changes at home, but we both have noticed she keeps saying she's "baby Susie" and insisting she's not a big girl, she's a baby. Well, I just started an infant 2 months ago. So, my theory is that she's jealous and struggling with the idea that she's not a baby anymore. So, I started talking up what she gets to do since she's a big girl and I encouraged Mom to talk her through their morning routine in order to prepare her ahead of time that she's coming to my house that day. The problem disappeared within a week. As I told Mom, these guys are more complex than we give them credit for sometimes.

Either way, close supervision while you figure out the reason. Put her somewhere separate when you aren't able to directly watch her and be ready to step in to prevent owies. Remind her nice hands, we don't hurt others. At 2 or older, I have them sit on a separate rug with a toy for a bit afterwards if they prove that they can't be nice friends by attempting to hurt others.

Good luck to you!!

This is the child I posted about last week in a separate post. She hits and throws fits at her parents. She does not do this to me and today she is just being terrible to other dcg. Nothing has changed here. Her parents are interesting and I think it's all them. I can't fix what goes on at home. Dcg was fine here with other girl until today.

[knoxmomof2]

Originally Posted by Valerie928

This is the child I posted about last week in a separate post. She hits and throws fits at her parents. She does not do this to me and today she is just being terrible to other dcg. Nothing has changed here. Her parents are interesting and I think it's all them. I can't fix what goes on at home. Dcg was fine here with other girl until today.

I totally agree that you can't fix what goes on at home. Just focus on close supervision and follow through for her behavior at your home. But, if it's due to a lack of ability to communicate then you can work with her. I was just giving some general situations that I've experienced in regards to if there are changes at home and how we've handled it.

The situation with these parents that you posted about before sounds difficult. I would just decide how much you can and want to deal with at your house and go from there.