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Old 02-25-2011, 11:28 AM
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Default It's Friday...Where Are This Week's Funny Stories?

Maybe it's because I have a few this week, but does anyone else? If so, let's hear 'em! Before I post, though, I will tell you that one is about poop and the other two about breastfeeding, so if that offends you (I don't think it could in this job), you may want to skip mine.

1. DCB almost 2: (shoves a handful of snow into his mouth)
DCB 4: "Awww, 'DCB' now you're gonna have white poop!"

2. One of my DCMs just had a baby last week. She brought the baby to visit, and he was hungry while they were here. DCM went to nurse him and my DS4 went over to see the baby. He's very comfortable with BFing (I BF him and his little brother), so I didn't think anything of it. DCM is also very comfortable and did not cover up at all. Well, I am Caucasion and DCM is Indian. Before I can stop him, DS blurts out, "Why do you have BLACK B**BS???" (Thankfully DCM just laughed hysterically and I was able to convince DS to give them both some space.)

3. Same DCM also has a 2.5 year old. Since DCM is newly breastfeeding, DCG is very interested in "Booboos" (she does NOT mean owies). Anyway, she keeps pointing mine out and I just keep telling her yes, that is what they are, etc. Finally she keeps asking me, "Where's your straw?" It took me a while, but I finally found out that DCM must have told her that baby gets milk from a "straw" in her "booboos." Heeheeheehee!!!! I just told her that I don't have a straw because I don't have a baby to feed.

Okay, let's hear them....
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Old 02-25-2011, 11:40 AM
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yes, I would have posted sooner but I have to share the puter today with my kids because its a snow day.

yesterday, dcb (he's 2) was in pnp for nap and his girlfriend was in the other one (she just turned 2) and all I hear from him "you hurt my nuts" I seriously had to pick my mouth up off the floor.

something else happened but I can't remember now.
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Old 02-25-2011, 11:51 AM
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I dont really have any stories that are funny but I am so glad you posted this.. I am so sadden by the fire story and really needed a laugh... those were some funny stories...

I guess the only one I have is kinda gross.

DCB age 4 farted and he said did I poop or fart? OMG I was so grossed out..
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Old 02-25-2011, 11:51 AM
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I can't think of any funnies from this week. I like that this is becoming a tradition, though!
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Old 02-25-2011, 11:52 AM
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I had some good ones to post but now I am blanking. I'm going to have to start writing them down.
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Old 02-25-2011, 11:53 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DCMomOf3 View Post
I had some good ones to post but now I am blanking. I'm going to have to start writing them down.
I was thinking that I'll have to start writing them down, too.
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Old 02-25-2011, 11:53 AM
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Well, my son asked if putting on a Mario costume would turn you into Mario. I said not really but you can pretend you are Mario. "Awe. I wish i could turn into Mario, that would be so cool." I always laugh when he says in a sad voice "I wish I could jump into the TV"
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Old 02-25-2011, 01:28 PM
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Not funny but cute. My 2yo loves everything princess. A few weeks ago my necklace broke and she talks about it all the time, "mommy your necklace bwoke. So my husband bought me a new one.

Now she says, "Daddy buy you new necklace...hes your prince?" "Can I play with it."

Along with her princess obsession my dcb 2 keeps telling me and his parents "I'm a pincess." I dont think his parents appreciate it.
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Old 02-25-2011, 01:45 PM
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this one is not so much funny, as it is a little spooky......

2 yr old DCB keeps telling another child to shut up.

after i discuss with him why thats not nice to say, i asked him why he was saying it.

he told me the puppets in the playroom were making him do it.

either my puppets are posessed, or there's somebody in my playroom that only DCB can see!!!!!!

(i'm slightly kidding- i dont believe in ghosts...lol )
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Old 02-25-2011, 01:47 PM
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Not horribly funny, but the kids were playing "work" yesterday. The DCG said she was gonna quite her job. I asked if I could quite my job too. She said sure, but were still gonna come to your house to play. Kind of defeats the purpose.

Along these same lines, I was also asked by a 4 year old this week why I don't work.
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Old 02-25-2011, 01:51 PM
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My 5 yr old dcg said my mom works to make money to pay you to take care of me and my sister
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Old 02-25-2011, 03:27 PM
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This one is from a 6 year old.

DCG: "Do you know why the Green Lightning soccer team beat the Orange Tigers in their game?"
ME: "No, why did they win?"
DCG: "Well, you know how lightning shoots things?"
ME: "Well, lightning strikes from the sky, and hits tall things sometimes..yes."
DCG: "Well, the Green Lightning played better than the Orange Tigers. That's why they won."

Hmm.
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Old 02-25-2011, 03:36 PM
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I was changing DCK dirty diaper who is 2 1/2. As I was wiping him he said "Ahh, watch my balls!"!!!! OMG! I wasn't even wiping rough. I was laughing so hard I was almost in tears! I proceeded to tell him if he was worried about it it was time to use the big boy potty.
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Old 02-25-2011, 04:10 PM
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We've been talking about Black History Month all month, so I guess this is where this came from....dcb3 tells dcg3 "you're a black woman!!"....I turned around to see 10 pairs of eyes fastened to my face to see what I would say...After I swallowed my laughs, I said "She's a little black girl." Everybody kind of nodded and went back to what they were doing
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Old 02-25-2011, 04:17 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Little People View Post
My 5 yr old dcg said my mom works to make money to pay you to take care of me and my sister
Hmmm wonder what they have been hearing

Quote:
Originally Posted by snowborden1 View Post
I was changing DCK dirty diaper who is 2 1/2. As I was wiping him he said "Ahh, watch my balls!"!!!! OMG! I wasn't even wiping rough. I was laughing so hard I was almost in tears! I proceeded to tell him if he was worried about it it was time to use the big boy potty.
This is so great!!!!
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Old 02-25-2011, 05:06 PM
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I had a parent that was going to come to my house to give me her payment for childcare for watching her two sons this week...I told her I had to make it to the bank right down the street before they closed at 6 and at that time she was already there so she stayed their and waited for me..I got their and she gave me the money...she said her one son wanted to see my really bad so I got out of my car and went to see him in his car...He was soo excited to see me..( I noticed he had gel in his hair and spiked a little) he is 3...I said aww do you have gel in your hair (never has gel in his hair)? And I told him I really liked it. His mother told me that as soon as he found out that he was going to see me he told his mom he had to have gel in his hair to go see me and then his mom said he has a crush on me...That made my day! That is so adorable!
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Old 02-25-2011, 11:31 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by snowborden1 View Post
I was changing DCK dirty diaper who is 2 1/2. As I was wiping him he said "Ahh, watch my balls!"!!!! OMG! I wasn't even wiping rough. I was laughing so hard I was almost in tears! I proceeded to tell him if he was worried about it it was time to use the big boy potty.
This made me laugh out loud!!!! You are right, if he can tell you HOW to wipe him he is DEFINITELY ready to use the potty!
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