Hi there
I have been doing home childcare for over 3 years now and have a question. How many providers out there supply breakfast?

When I started, I said if your child is here before 8AM I will supply breakfast. I have one mom (and she is VERY young and irresponsible at times) who will arrive at 8:15 or later on many mornings and has not fed the kids. I know she is up early as she is on Facebook (and a friend of mine) at like 6:30 AM, and from talking I know her youngest is awake at 6AM every day. Yet, she brings them here unfed after my 8AM deadline.

Also, one morning she proceeded to tell me that her youngest was poopy and as she said "that could explain why he did not want to sit down to put his shoes on at home" which means he was poopy at home, and she chose to leave him in a dirty diaper, force him to sit in a stroller and walk to my house which is about a 20 minute walk. I was blown away!!!

Any advice on dealing with this MOM!??? And how many of you do supply breakfast? Never has my contract mentioned breakfast was included. On another note, last summer I emailed all my parents indicating that I would be closing at 5:30 (instead of 6 as I found the day way too long) and only this one mom and her husband emailed me back whining that there was no way they could be here for 5:30 it would be more like 5:45. Well September 1st too bad. I am done catering to this one family when no one else takes advantage the way they do.

Any advice????

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I offer breakfast. My cut off is at 8:00. I have it posted in my policy. I used to have a family that came & did not feed their youngest cuz she was sleeping but fed the 2 older. I got tired of having to feed her right away when she came & one time just told the mother she will need to wait till snack time to eat then. She started coming fed after that. Another family there child arrived a few time with a messy diaper, I gave them the benifet of the doubt that it happened on the drive they had a 15-20 min drive. One time I made the comment that she could change him & she did then it amazed me that he did not have any accidents after that. That was also from a family that always made sure he was in a clean diaper when he left. They wanted me to change him even after I had called to have all the kids picked up to plumbing issues & that was why I had them picked up cuz I could not wash hands after diaper changes. The father asked 3 times before getting "it" that I was not changing diapers due to my plumbing problems.

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As far as the breakfast question I do supply breakfast for the kids. I basically serve family style so it's out for them to eat from about 7:30a - 8:30a. If someone comes late and hasn't eaten they can have some fruit to hold them off until snack which is at about 9:30ish/10.

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as far as the dirty a.m. diapers, i just casually say.... "well, his diapers are right there in his cubbie, feel free to go change him."

breakfast time here is 8:30-almost-9:00, only because no one gets here until then...lol. if a child shows up a little late, and we're already all cleaned up, then oh well. i know that may sound harsh, but all of the parents KNOW the schedule, and there's NO reason they cant eat at home if they dont get here until 9. our lunch is at 11:30/45 anyway, so they wont starve. this is very rare to happen here anyway.

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It's in my policies that I have a schedule and we eat together at certain times. If they are not here by the time meals and snacks start then they miss it. Sorry, no exceptions. It's too hard to prepare a meal for some kids only to have another kid arrive 15 minutes later after I have put everything away. If they miss it then children are to arrive fed and clean! Meaning clean diapers. I feel each child's diaper when they get here. No joke.

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I supply Breakfast but I make all parents know that they are to be here by 7:30 because I only make breakfast once. If they arrive after 7:45 then they will wait for the next time we eat. The bus comes at 8:20 anyway and I don't want to be rushed to make it as other children are arriving, I don't want to rush the children to eat, and I don't want to rush the children to get ready with shoes coats etc after they eat.

One mom tried this with me. She didn't have time to feed them at home and then in the same breath said she was up since 5am exercising. Ugh!!

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first I would make the mom change his butt, because that is totally irresponable on her part. Second, can you move your breakfast to 830am instead. I find that alot of kids don't like to eat so early (unless you go to school then you get it at 730am) the rest get it around 830am. I find it works better. But I'm mean and if you are here then you get breakfast, if not, too bad.

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Since this is a very young mom, is there a chance she may not have thought about the fact that she needs to change her child's diaper in the morning, and that it's not your job? You may just need to be blunt with her and tell her she NEEDS to change the diaper before leaving the house. She may not have much of a mother-figure herself, or at least someone to teach her how to be a mom, and you may be the closest thing she's got.

I had a young mom tell me a while back that I didn't need to cut up grapes for her 17-month-old, that he does just fine with whole ones . Sorry, but everyone under 3 in my house gets their edible choke hazards in un-choke-able pieces! She just didn't know ...

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Dealing with mom: Sounds like you may have to just be really blunt with her in order for her to get it.

Breakfast: I don't serve it. I just updated my contract and even added that kids need to come fed. They are not allowed to bring breakfast and eat it here because they become too distracted and will not eat well.

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I serve breakfast from 7:30-8 and those that arrive after that are not served breakfast. The only exception I've ever made for that was a 2yo who was dropped off by grandma at 8:15 - I gave him a bowl of cereal b/c grandma didn't know the policy. She does now.

For the dirty diapers? Hand her a diaper/wipes and let her do it. Poor kid shouldn't have to sit in a dirty diaper that long. I understand that happening occasionally (sometimes it happens in the car or people simply don't notice it) but if she knows the child has pooped she should change him.

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Oh no all my parents know that breakfest is from 7:30 to 8am if there child is here after that and they didnt feed them then they wait till lunch till 11 I know it's not fair to the kids but the parents have to learn. It doesnt bother me if a child is poopy when the parents drop off it probably happened in the car it bothers me when a parent brings there child in a 10 pound diaper from over night because they didnt change them thats gross.

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I serve breakfast however parents are to provide all the food, not me, so its not a big deal to me. He just eats a banana or yogurt anyway or fruitloops. Another reason I dont take toddlers..

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I serve from 7-8:30. If a child arrives late and hasn't been fed, I feed him anyway...I won't let a child go hungry because their parent failed to feed them or arrive on time for breakfast. BUT, it RARELY happens.

As a pp said, is it possible to move breakfast time to end at 8:30? That's what I would do....especially if it is a daily thing.

BUT, I WOULD have a heart to heart with Mom. Be blunt, it's simple: "My policies are in place for valid reasons, and I put much consideration into how they would effect my daycare families, as well as my own family before I put them in writing. They are in place to ensure that all children recieve the quality care they deserve and that they are able to enjoy their time in care. You need to be respectful of those policies, or you will need to find another program that can better meet the needs of your family and your schedule."

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hey girl i feel you, I been in my home for 6 years and the thing i use to put up with are similar. What i did is type up my rules and if you dont follow 2 out of 10 rules you are verably warn do it again and ur out there are too many parents looking for a good provider like u and i ,we are over worked and under paid as it is dont try to take advantage. lol

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as a parent and a former provider, i don't see the big deal about breakfast cutoff times - unless you're on a food program that says you can't serve past a certain time. even then, they could bring their own food.

8:00 is really not that late for someone that has to get up, get ready, get a child or children ready - and drive for who knows how long to get to daycare. i know my kids don't like to eat right after they wake up. they were waking up at 5:30am for a long time - and they didn't want to eat - they were barely awake. i thought it was stupid that they had to either eat by 8 or starve.

my son is in preschool now and on his first day, i tried to feed him before he went and he wouldn't eat. they don't have lunch until 11! i was happy to find out that they serve breakfast and they let them eat regardless of the time. we're talking about BABIES who are hungry! i couldn't imagine a baby or child being hungry and being like, "oh, well, it's 8:00 - sorry!"

kids can't help it if their parents are too lazy to feed them breakfast, but that's not always the case - like with my kids. i'd try to make them eat, but they weren't ready. unlike adults, kids eat only when they're hungry. if a child is hungry, you feed them - that's my rule.

i always let parents bring food for their kids if they wanted to also. a lot of people don't do that either. who cares if one kid has an apple and the other has a chocolate pop tart. life isn't fair. starting in kindergarten, kids can pack their lunch and they're not going to have the same food. IMO, we're not doing them any favors by making them all have the same food.

my kids went to a daycare that had an 8:00 cutoff and no outside food was allowed. they also went to a daycare where they could bring their own breakfast, lunch, and snack if we chose to (but food was provided if we didn't) and i liked being able to pack their food much better. if i was running late, i could send them into daycare at 8:05 with a biscuit. you shouldn't have to choose between getting in trouble at work or your kid starving. of course, that's just my opinion.

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Unfortunately QualiTcare the things you stated are the reason I believe so many child care providers "burn-out" so quickly. I also had to enforce a "no breakfast after 8am" policy at my family day care. It is not something that was meant to inconvenience parents, but instead to ensure that all children in my care are enjoying stimulating, fun and healthy care. I personally would not opt to just not feed a child that hadn't had breakfast yet, but I certainly wouldn't tell a parent that. Instead, I would offer a warning that if it continued I would have to give the my notice to terminate care. I find myself "running around like a chicken with my head cut-off" when I allow parents to run my program. Don't get me wrong, I don't get the whole "name everything parents do wrong" game, I just don't allow parents to take advantage and ruin my program. I have children who are in my care starting at 6:30am and are tired of "free-play" and ready for circle time and other group activities. When parents bring their children in at 8:30-9am needing breakfast I end up with miserable children and a stressful situation. It is just me with 3-8 children..there has to be a schedule!!

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I had to put this in my handbook and let parents know that I was happy to get the kids dressed in the morning if it helped make the morning go easier....but that they must come in a clean diaper. I explained (shouldn't have to be explained...but oh well) that numerous children lying around and sitting on furniture with wet, overnight diapers was a health hazard to my family and the other children. It states that they will be responsible for carpet cleaning if I find wet patches.... I know accidents happen....but you can tell when a diaper is ridiculously full.

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Grrrrrrrrrrr!!! I swear I had the same young mom!!! Would bring the child 2 hours late and look at me cross-eyed when I didn't break program and rush downstairs to cook breakfast...AGAIN!!! I think it's abuse not to feed and diaper your kids just so they can eat at daycare and be changed by your provider. Here is what I've since put in my policy....

The Drop Off Policy has been written with your child’s program consistency in mind. Please read very carefully to ensure your child has a great day!

It is our hope that you take full advantage of the program and also avoid disruption by arriving between 7:30 a.m. and 8:30 a.m. Please be aware that your child may miss preschool or general activities (including projects), due to late arrival (please see the daily schedule for activity times).

At drop off, children must arrive dressed and ready for the day in clean clothes (no pajamas please), including hair groomed, bathed and freshly diapered.

Please do not prolong drop off…it is normal and appropriate for a child to cry right at separation. Crying usually stops as soon as mom or dad leave.

If arriving after a scheduled meal time (especially breakfast), it is required that the meal be served at home (please see the daily schedule for meal times).

If arriving after 9:30 a.m., it is not guaranteed that we will be at the daycare home. We cannot put a hold on activities for individual lateness. If we have left for an outing, it will be the parent’s responsibility to drop the child off at our location.

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BTW, I didn't break program in front of her but I of course went down and fed that poor baby...it's not his fault his mom is a DITSO!!!

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I serve breakfast until 8am. We leave for the bus stop by 8:10. Right now, though, I have kids that come between 8:10-8:45. They wait until snack time to eat which is at 9:45. Sometimes, the mom of one of the dcg (who comes at 8:10) will say she didnt' eat anything yet. Not my problem that mom can't get up 10 mins earlier to feed her daughter breakfast.
This is the same mom who will ask me to "fix" her daughter's hair because she didn't have time. This 3 yr old hair is always done up, in ponytails, french braids, reg. braids etc It doesn't take long for it to get messed up when she's playing. I will fix it for her when she wakes up from a nap, that's it.

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Oh, I've had the old "do my kid's hair" request before. Mommy wanted me to CORN ROW her daughter's hair. I had 7 daycare kids at the time....UM....NO.

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I serve until 8 am breakfast. We left the bus stop at 8:10. Now, though, I have kids come between 8:10-8:45. When they eat the snack time is 21:45. Sometimes, in the dynamic electrocardiogram (who came in 8:10) A mother will say she did not 'eat anything. Not my problem, my mother could not get up 10 minutes early to feed her daughter's breakfast...

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None of that would be a big deal if that were the only child you were providing for and that is where so many parents go wrong. They act as thought their child is the only child being cared for.

I used to do breakfast but I stopped as of 1/1 and I don't allow them to bring food. I do have an occasional drop off with 1/2 a pop tart left and I let him go to the table to finish it but they NEVER do. They just want to play.

WHEN I fed breakfast I fed it 8:15-8:45
in order to participate you had to be here by 8:30 the latest. I am not a short order cook.

I do still provide snacks. and I have times for that as well.
i have one mom who is on mat. leave and brings her daughter (older sib) later in the mornings because they are just not in much of a hurry to leave their house.
I am totally fine with that and she is nice enough to always ask and to let me know when they are on their way.
But I feed morning snack now at 9am and the kids are done at 9:15

If she arrives at 9:25 - she waits til lunch to eat.
Mom knows this.

The diaper thing? I haven't had to deal with it so it doesn't seem like that big a deal to me. But I'm sure if it happened regularly it would upset me enough to have to say somehting.

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I don't serve breakfast, period. I open at 7:30 and it is the parents responsibility to get their kid up, fed, dressed, changed and ready for the day. Like another poster said, I am not keeping all the kids waiting around and bored while ONE family shows up late and expects something different. I do feel bad for these kids but OP you will drive yourself crazy trying to create your program around one immature parent. If she can't follow the rules, then she doesn't belong there.

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I serve every meal of the day (3 meals and snacks)

I didn't want to serve breakfast but all of my families bring their kids and say little johnny hasn't eaten yet he needs fed, type things so I just started feeding and claim what I can on my food program. My daycare opens at 8:30 and kids are all in by 9:00 am usually. What stinks is I can only claim 3 times per day, per child. 2 snack and 1 meal or 2 meals and 1 snack. I have a child that is here for over 10 hrs sometimes so I have to feed him everything and just not get paid for some meals (breakfast and evening snack are unpaid usually) Sometimes I hate the fact that my family doesn't get a single meal to eat together without DCKs attending as well. Even worse are the parents who tell me things like "oh I am so glad I don't have to feed Johnny because u do it all for me I just wake him up bring him and know he will be fed good nutritious food. At the end of the day no worries I just pick him up and get him ready for bed with a full belly" Yeah it's nice to compliment me for my serving of nutritional meals but at the same time she doesn't hear the sad part of her child going without his Mom. I know she has to work but wake the child earlier or spend time with him before bed etc.

Another peeve I have is what we can't claim on the meals. If I take the kids out to a restaurant or eat at the parks/zoos I can't claim it because I didn't cook it. Same with ordering in subs or pizza and pasta, salads, etc. Even though I paid for it I can't claim it because I didn't cook it in my home.

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I serve breakfast at 8 and snack at 10 so any kid arriving after breakfast just waits til snack. I've never had a child complain about being hungry.

Make sure you give the parents warning about sticking to your 5:30 closing time. And impose a fine for late pick ups. Often times when more money is involved the parents find a way to follow rules. Also be prepared to loose the client as they may find a daycare that's open later.

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Just remember to document every meal you serve for tax purposes. It sucks you can't claim meals you don't cook keep track of them too though. In MN we are allowed to claim meals at restaurants and such as long as they still follow food program guidelines.

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