safechner 07:24 AM 04-09-2010
It is so nice to have a day off, haha. Anyways, I have a few questions. Do you have bipolar children in your daycare? If you do, how do you handle it? I don't know much about bipolar. Maybe you can help me out.
I have a 4 year old dcg who have so much changed mood up and down since she was 2 years old. For example, she got in trouble for hitting her sister twice and I told her to go time out with my calm voice. She refused to go time out and tell me no. I have to pick her up to go time out. She runs off the corner and tell me "I am sorry" and I told her you need to stay time out for 4 mins and she said no then sorry. She changed so much often in between one hour. Finally she stays in the corner for 4 mins then I asked her are you ready for apologies and she said no. I then turned away from her then she runs to me said sorry then I said it is ok but she tells me no then run to the corner over, over, over. I kinda fed up with her most of time. About 30 mins later, she goes back to normal again. I dont know what is deal with her since I never have deal like this before. My husband said she might have bipolar because he used to take nurse class while he was in college for three years then he changed his major something else. I decided research about it about two years ago. She still acts same since she was 2 years old. I thought she may outgrow of it but it wasn't. I just wanted to handle without having a hard time with her. I do not want to spoil her like let her have whatever she wants. She have to learn how to share, be nice each other, etc.. It has nothing changed for two years now. I dont know what to do because I am at a loss.
I didnt want to say anything about this to her mother at all. The mother have to find out on her own. I asked her mother a long time ago and she said she was doing the same at home. She said she will outgrow of it but it is not. Any advice??
She is MUCH too young to be diagnosed with bipolar disorder. Generally, onset occurs closer to puberty. Also, changes in behavior take place in weeks, not several times during the course of a day.
(ps: I do have a recent degree in psychology so I do have some knowledge in this area, however I'm no expect in child pychological disorders. If you are truly concerned you should refer her to her pediatrician.)
safechner 08:30 AM 04-09-2010
Well she have done like that everyday. That is why I have to give her what she wants if she tried to take stuff away from her sister because she will change real fast like she hits me, yelled, changed so much mood, hits other kids for no reason, etc.... Sometime it will continue ALL DAY if she is in trouble! Her 3 years old sister is fine like normal. Her mother don't want to deal with her if she is in trouble, too. Some days she will change mood up and down for no reason.
I know it is too young to find out if she have it or not. I have read about it but I wasn't sure about it.
Originally Posted by safechner:
Well she have done like that everyday. That is why I have to give her what she wants if she tried to take stuff away from her sister because she will change real fast like she hits me, yelled, changed so much mood, hits other kids for no reason, etc.... Sometime it will continue ALL DAY if she is in trouble! Her 3 years old sister is fine like normal. Her mother don't want to deal with her if she is in trouble, too. Some days she will change mood up and down for no reason.
Sorry, it sounds to me as if she is simply doing what works. If you want the behavior to change you and Mom need to work together to teacher her that her behavior will NOT result in getting what she wants.
safechner 08:44 AM 04-09-2010
Originally Posted by jen:
Sorry, it sounds to me as if she is simply doing what works. If you want the behavior to change you and Mom need to work together to teacher her that her behavior will NOT result in getting what she wants.
I have tried to get us to work together to have the same page what to do with her but it doesn't work. What she was doing something wrong then I told her how her behavior in here. Her mother will send her to her father who will spank her to get in trouble for that because I refused to spank any kids here when they asked for it.
Chickenhauler 02:24 AM 04-11-2010
From your description, she's pushing buttons to see what the reaction is, and in the process, testing how much she can get away with.
Stand your ground, be firm and consistent, and sooner or later, she'll come to realize that what may fly at home won't fly here.
We see it all the time....as soon as the door closes and mom or dad aren't in sight, good behavior......until mom or dad arrives, then Beelzebub resurfaces.
This one is going to be an interesting teenager if this continues.
Childminder 07:25 AM 04-12-2010
I have had 2 children in care with bi-polar one was 5 when diagnosed and one was 6 and in school. The 5yr old also had ODD, and OCD. It's not fun and they need to be shadowed constantly. I learned not to leave them alone for a second. ex: Come on C I have to go change the babies diaper, Come with me C I have to go potty, Come here C we are going to fix lunch. The concern for the other children were my reasons. It's a hard subject to deal with the parents about, besides what do we know we are just babysitters. If the child goes to preschool and it is seen by the "teachers" I have been brought in for discussion and the child gets evaluated and counseled and usually medication.
Do you in your state have any intervention counselors from the state that will come in at your request and observe? Our state does not but some do.
safechner 12:37 PM 04-12-2010
I have thought about this this past weekend. I have to stand up by her if she is in trouble. This morning, I had a great mood and more energetic. The girls just arrived today. About 30 mins later, I asked her to go to the play room so we can get some coloring book. She refused because she wants to stay in the living room for some reason. I told her it is fine. We went to the play room to get the book for her sister. For some reason, she was angry to come in the play room and hit me and her sister because I gave her sister barbie color book that she chose. I took her to time out so she threw a big fit (very bad temper) and told her to stay in the corner for 4 mins for hitting me and her sister then I left. She runs to me very often and I put her back in time out very often without talking to her. She screamed out of her lung and said those words very often "sorry," "I hate you," "no," and giving me a very nasty looks for more than two hours. She finally gave up and calm then I set up 4 mins for her. When it was over then I walked to her are you ready for apologizes and she finally said, " I am sorry" but she tried to control herself so hard. Wow, it was very rough today with her but I feel so good. I am glad it went well but we will wait and see how she acts this week.
safechner 12:40 PM 04-12-2010
Originally Posted by Childminder:
If the child goes to preschool and it is seen by the "teachers" I have been brought in for discussion and the child gets evaluated and counseled and usually medication.
Do you in your state have any intervention counselors from the state that will come in at your request and observe? Our state does not but some do.
That is why I dont want to say anything at all until she goes to preschool or kindergarten and she will seen by the teachers. The teachers will discussion with her if they noticed her if possible.
I have no idea if I have any intervention counselor in Texas. Maybe I will find out whatever I can.