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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>I am so much more
mrsnj 07:35 AM 11-04-2014
I have a daycare gmom here who started out as a friend at church way before her grandkids became clients. But all S knows how to do is talk about the kids with me. Now I would say she is just a totally in love gmom who whips out her kids pics at the blink of an eye to show the world. Only she only does it with me. She will hold convos with everyone else around me....but me. I could be talking with someone else about something and she will whip her head around and inject in some way something that one of the kids did or said that could be totally unrelated to the conversation. I hear about how E is going poop at home. How C is so bright and doing XYZ. About what they ate. Did I notice....want to see....does she do...... AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
Sigh
It makes me sad and frustrated and to the point I want to talk away in the other direction so I do not have to speak with her. Only issue is we are both in choir together and there is times I cannot get away.
"Dear Gmom
I am sooooooo much more than a provider. I was your friend. I like to read and go to the movies and take long walks. I have children of my own. I enjoy painting and drawing. I can be a wallflower at times but I love putting the music on loud and dancing around my livingroom too. I enjoy ballroom dancing and I have a habit of talking to myself when I think no one else is around. I am funny, I cry at everything, I am quirky....I am a sister, daughter, mother, friend. I am so much more than a daycare provider and although I love your gkids I do not want to hear about when they fart, hit each other, watched a movie, went grocery shopping, ate a cookie, etc etc etc. Sometimes, just once in a while, I like to be ME."
Do you guys ever feel this way? Like sometimes people cannot see you beyond your business?
Sigh
It makes me sad and frustrated and to the point I want to talk away in the other direction so I do not have to speak with her. Only issue is we are both in choir together and there is times I cannot get away."Dear Gmom
I am sooooooo much more than a provider. I was your friend. I like to read and go to the movies and take long walks. I have children of my own. I enjoy painting and drawing. I can be a wallflower at times but I love putting the music on loud and dancing around my livingroom too. I enjoy ballroom dancing and I have a habit of talking to myself when I think no one else is around. I am funny, I cry at everything, I am quirky....I am a sister, daughter, mother, friend. I am so much more than a daycare provider and although I love your gkids I do not want to hear about when they fart, hit each other, watched a movie, went grocery shopping, ate a cookie, etc etc etc. Sometimes, just once in a while, I like to be ME."
Do you guys ever feel this way? Like sometimes people cannot see you beyond your business?
Baby Beluga 07:43 AM 11-04-2014
I actually think I like that parents sometimes can't see beyond my business side. For me, when they start knowing those quirks and personal things about me I tend to freak a bit inside and feel like my personal space and life is being invaded.
But, I also have never been friends with or known anyone outside of daycare prior to watching their children.
But, I also have never been friends with or known anyone outside of daycare prior to watching their children.
Kimskiddos 08:23 AM 11-04-2014
I totally get this! Years ago (when I was dumb enough to work with friends) I had a friend/dcm that always introduced me as the kids child care provider. After a while of that I finally told her "You know we were friends long before I started caring for your kids." I know she was happy that I was there for her kids and I of course love them to pieces. But it did bug me that I was no longer the friend but the ccp!
TaylorTots 08:33 AM 11-04-2014
I've had an "advice-needing DCM" before. Whenever I saw her outside of DC she wants advice on DCK. The last thing I want when in the middle of the grocery store!
MyAngels 09:03 AM 11-04-2014
She probably gets tuned out by anyone else when she starts to go on about her grandkids 
. She figures you won't mind since you care for them, too.
It is very frustrating when people don't recognize that, while we care for and may even love these kids, they are not our whole lives
. She figures you won't mind since you care for them, too. It is very frustrating when people don't recognize that, while we care for and may even love these kids, they are not our whole lives
Annalee 09:09 AM 11-04-2014
Originally Posted by MyAngels:
She probably gets tuned out by anyone else when she starts to go on about her grandkids. She figures you won't mind since you care for them, too.
It is very frustrating when people don't recognize that, while we care for and may even love these kids, they are not our whole lives
That is frustrating....I used to hate church, family, school functions because someone always said "hey, ms xxx will watch all the kids"....till I started saying "not today" or "not tonight"....gradually they got the hint...now I have to deal with people wanting to let their kids play in my daycare when they come to my house...NOPE, not doing that either!!!!! it is lockedShe probably gets tuned out by anyone else when she starts to go on about her grandkids
. She figures you won't mind since you care for them, too. It is very frustrating when people don't recognize that, while we care for and may even love these kids, they are not our whole lives
nannyde 10:13 AM 11-04-2014
There's a way to get her to stop. When she says anything say some version of "that's perfectly normal" "they ALL do that" "that's what two year olds do" "my kid did that (insert a year earlier)" "I've seen that a million times" "oh little Susie (another daycare kid that is way younger) does that"
Start referring everything she says about them specifically about ALL the other kids.
Start referring everything she says about them specifically about ALL the other kids.
Silly Songs 10:36 AM 11-04-2014
You could say to her " Nancy, you know I see your grandchildren a lot, let's talk about something else '
Play Care 10:42 AM 11-04-2014
I'm not necessarily friends with clients but I do seem to get the vibe that people always want to talk "shop" with me. It is frustrating! I have actually said at outing "oh I never talk shop at a party!" With a big 
and then change the subject...
and then change the subject...
sugar buzz 11:26 AM 11-04-2014
Originally Posted by nannyde:
There's a way to get her to stop. When she says anything say some version of "that's perfectly normal" "they ALL do that" "that's what two year olds do" "my kid did that (insert a year earlier)" "I've seen that a million times" "oh little Susie (another daycare kid that is way younger) does that"
Start referring everything she says about them specifically about ALL the other kids.
There's a way to get her to stop. When she says anything say some version of "that's perfectly normal" "they ALL do that" "that's what two year olds do" "my kid did that (insert a year earlier)" "I've seen that a million times" "oh little Susie (another daycare kid that is way younger) does that"
Start referring everything she says about them specifically about ALL the other kids.
It's not as much fun, when your Supreme Bearer of Awesomeness crown is ripped off......
Rockgirl 11:34 AM 11-04-2014
She may be showing others around her that she has this connection with you....something they don't? Just a thought.