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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>I Am Losing My MIND!!
amtnk 11:19 AM 11-14-2013
I have been in childcare for 5 years (mostly church daycares and one commericial daycare). I left the field for awhile, and now I have opened my own home daycare. I am also 6 months pregnant, so this may all seem like a bigger deal than it really is (rant ahead).
I have never dealt with more ridiculous parents and children!
I have one family who started 3 weeks ago. They just moved to town, and they can't seem to get into a schedule with their 2 yr old. They are constantly late with drop offs, they don't call if the child is late or absent. They put him to bed "late" - (11pm sometimes), and during nap time he screams bloody murder for mommy and daddy. He will *NOT* nap, regardless of what I do. Story time, back rubs, white noise, tell him to just rest, etc.
They send him with no breakfast, and all my potty training efforts go down the drain when he's not in attendance for a few days.
I have a 1 year old infant who acts like she is 6 months old. She cries if another child looks at her, touches her or if I leave the room to go to the bathroom. She is HIGHLY sensitive, HIGH maintenance and cries pretty much from drop off to pick up. She naps for 20 minutes, 5 times a day. I have tried to put her on two good nap schedules, but since she only comes 4 times a week (sometimes half days), it's impossible for anything to stick. Her mom has her on her hip 24/7, coddles her constantly and she demands attention constantly.
I have an 18 month old biter, that I'm ready to term soon.
AND I have a 3 year old who is a mean little girl who doesn't eat anything ever.
I am so stressed out, I can't cope, I cry almost everyday (well those are the hormones). Is this the way it's supposed to be? UHGH.
I have never dealt with more ridiculous parents and children!
I have one family who started 3 weeks ago. They just moved to town, and they can't seem to get into a schedule with their 2 yr old. They are constantly late with drop offs, they don't call if the child is late or absent. They put him to bed "late" - (11pm sometimes), and during nap time he screams bloody murder for mommy and daddy. He will *NOT* nap, regardless of what I do. Story time, back rubs, white noise, tell him to just rest, etc.
They send him with no breakfast, and all my potty training efforts go down the drain when he's not in attendance for a few days.
I have a 1 year old infant who acts like she is 6 months old. She cries if another child looks at her, touches her or if I leave the room to go to the bathroom. She is HIGHLY sensitive, HIGH maintenance and cries pretty much from drop off to pick up. She naps for 20 minutes, 5 times a day. I have tried to put her on two good nap schedules, but since she only comes 4 times a week (sometimes half days), it's impossible for anything to stick. Her mom has her on her hip 24/7, coddles her constantly and she demands attention constantly.
I have an 18 month old biter, that I'm ready to term soon.
AND I have a 3 year old who is a mean little girl who doesn't eat anything ever.
I am so stressed out, I can't cope, I cry almost everyday (well those are the hormones). Is this the way it's supposed to be? UHGH.
WImom 11:55 AM 11-14-2013
I'm starting to think that's how kids are today. 
I have a few really great kids/parents mixed in with kids/parents like you describe.
I took a break a few years ago for 2 years and started again 3 years ago. The kids and parents seem different now.
Cat Herder 12:19 PM 11-14-2013
Originally Posted by amtnk:
1.They are constantly late with drop offs, they don't call if the child is late or absent.
2. They put him to bed "late" - (11pm sometimes), and during nap time he screams bloody murder for mommy and daddy. He will *NOT* nap, regardless of what I do. Story time, back rubs, white noise, tell him to just rest, etc.
3. They send him with no breakfast
4. all my potty training efforts go down the drain when he's not in attendance for a few days.
5. I have a 1 year old infant who acts like she is 6 months old. She cries if another child looks at her, touches her or if I leave the room to go to the bathroom. She is HIGHLY sensitive, HIGH maintenance and cries pretty much from drop off to pick up. She naps for 20 minutes, 5 times a day. I have tried to put her on two good nap schedules, but since she only comes 4 times a week (sometimes half days), it's impossible for anything to stick. Her mom has her on her hip 24/7, coddles her constantly and she demands attention constantly.
6. I have an 18 month old biter, that I'm ready to term soon.
7. AND I have a 3 year old who is a mean little girl who doesn't eat anything ever.
I am so stressed out, I can't cope, I cry almost everyday (well those are the hormones). Is this the way it's supposed to be? UHGH.
Simplify. 1.They are constantly late with drop offs, they don't call if the child is late or absent.
2. They put him to bed "late" - (11pm sometimes), and during nap time he screams bloody murder for mommy and daddy. He will *NOT* nap, regardless of what I do. Story time, back rubs, white noise, tell him to just rest, etc.
3. They send him with no breakfast
4. all my potty training efforts go down the drain when he's not in attendance for a few days.
5. I have a 1 year old infant who acts like she is 6 months old. She cries if another child looks at her, touches her or if I leave the room to go to the bathroom. She is HIGHLY sensitive, HIGH maintenance and cries pretty much from drop off to pick up. She naps for 20 minutes, 5 times a day. I have tried to put her on two good nap schedules, but since she only comes 4 times a week (sometimes half days), it's impossible for anything to stick. Her mom has her on her hip 24/7, coddles her constantly and she demands attention constantly.
6. I have an 18 month old biter, that I'm ready to term soon.
7. AND I have a 3 year old who is a mean little girl who doesn't eat anything ever.
I am so stressed out, I can't cope, I cry almost everyday (well those are the hormones). Is this the way it's supposed to be? UHGH.
In your shoes:
1. Set a drop-off by time. "No arrivals after 10am" Turn them away at the door. *Only has to happen once to work. If they don't call/show by 10, you win.
2. Send him home. "Unable to participate in activities". Usually only has to happen once.
Mommy Time Out.3. Turn them away at the door to eat breakfast and come back. If arrive after 10am see #1
4. Parents potty train, not childcare providers. Only take kids potty when they ask. Put the onus back on the parents, it was never yours to begin with.
5. Put a star on the calendar for 30 days from today. On that day, if you still dread her arrival, term her. The stress hormone release she is causing is not worth it.
6. Give Term papers tomorrow. Place ad today. May solve ^^ as well.
7. Off to bed when she can't be nice. She will eat when she is hungry, don't keep score. Offer meals, give adequate time, move on. The parents also feed her every day, she will survive. Promise.
Great Beginnings 12:21 PM 11-14-2013
I feel for you to no end! I am 3 months pregnant and have the morning/all day sickness with the hormones. I have felt so stressed to the point I literally hate my job. Things that never seemed to bother me are getting under my skin. I honestly think 1 out of 5 families these days know how to raise children and make a good fit for our daycares. The other 4, I used to be able to tolerate lol but the last month my tolerance level is dwindling drastically. 
KIDZRMYBIZ 03:10 PM 11-14-2013
It is SUPER DUPER hard to operate a dc while prego for lots of reasons. I did it with 2 of my 3. But...it is so, so, so, so worth the agony to hang in there to be home with your little bundle when he or she arrives. Good heavens, we see first hand every day the absolute messes most kids are anymore, and I, for one, did not want my children hanging out with them at someone else's daycare without my constant influence!
daycare 03:18 PM 11-14-2013
Originally Posted by Cat Herder:
Simplify.
In your shoes:
1. Set a drop-off by time. "No arrivals after 10am" Turn them away at the door. *Only has to happen once to work. If they don't call/show by 10, you win.
2. Send him home. "Unable to participate in activities". Usually only has to happen once. Mommy Time Out.
3. Turn them away at the door to eat breakfast and come back. If arrive after 10am see #1
4. Parents potty train, not childcare providers. Only take kids potty when they ask. Put the onus back on the parents, it was never yours to begin with.
5. Put a star on the calendar for 30 days from today. On that day, if you still dread her arrival, term her. The stress hormone release she is causing is not worth it.
6. Give Term papers tomorrow. Place ad today. May solve ^^ as well.
7. Off to bed when she can't be nice. She will eat when she is hungry, don't keep score. Offer meals, give adequate time, move on. The parents also feed her every day, she will survive. Promise.
everything she said 100% !!!!!Simplify.
In your shoes:
1. Set a drop-off by time. "No arrivals after 10am" Turn them away at the door. *Only has to happen once to work. If they don't call/show by 10, you win.
2. Send him home. "Unable to participate in activities". Usually only has to happen once.
Mommy Time Out.3. Turn them away at the door to eat breakfast and come back. If arrive after 10am see #1
4. Parents potty train, not childcare providers. Only take kids potty when they ask. Put the onus back on the parents, it was never yours to begin with.
5. Put a star on the calendar for 30 days from today. On that day, if you still dread her arrival, term her. The stress hormone release she is causing is not worth it.
6. Give Term papers tomorrow. Place ad today. May solve ^^ as well.
7. Off to bed when she can't be nice. She will eat when she is hungry, don't keep score. Offer meals, give adequate time, move on. The parents also feed her every day, she will survive. Promise.
I used to read this advice from others only to think oh it will MAGICALLY get better somehow, or I will try this or that or talk to the parents to see if I can turn it around.
in the end, I wish I would have just listened from the day I read the advise on here.
Soccermom 04:59 PM 11-14-2013
I have been doing childcare in my home for about 10 years now and every year it gets worse.
Kids seem to be the ones in charge these days and the parents seem to just give in to their tantrums and demands. They run the show. Parents also seem to be getting more and more clueless about what their role as a parent is and rely WAY too much on their provider to raise their child.
I now tell parents right from day one - I am here to provide a service to you while you make a living but you are the parent and we need to work together in order for this relationship to work. I have a list of what is expected of me and what is expected of them. I hand it to them and have them sign and return it. I make them a copy of it to keep as well.
This is the list -
As a Childcare Provider I am expected to :
Provide care, love and nurturing to your child while you are unable to be with him.
Ensure that your child is clean and comfortable while in my care.
Ensure that your child has an opportunity to learn and play while in my care.
Provide a clean and safe environment for your child to explore.
Provide regular meal times, snack times and nap times.
Be available to care for your child during my hours of operation but for no more than 10 hours per day.
Treat your child as if he were my own while he is in my care.
As a parent you are expected to :
Put your child to bed at a reasonable time in order for him to be able to participate in activities while in my care.
Dress your child appropriately for childcare including proper outdoor clothing.
Provide a nutritious meal as well as snacks for your child.
Provide the items needed for me to properly care for your child.
Be on time to pick up your child. They miss you when you are gone.
Feed your child a nutritious breakfast before bringing your child to daycare.
Potty train your child when you feel the time is right. I am but a helper in this process and will follow your lead. Potty training is an intimate process that is best begun at home.
Most importantly - Spend as much time with your child as possible. Even though your child has a great time in my care, there is no substitute for a parent. No matter how much your child loves his daycare, he will always prefer spending time with you.
Let's work as a team and make childcare a great experience for everyone involved!
Kids seem to be the ones in charge these days and the parents seem to just give in to their tantrums and demands. They run the show. Parents also seem to be getting more and more clueless about what their role as a parent is and rely WAY too much on their provider to raise their child.
I now tell parents right from day one - I am here to provide a service to you while you make a living but you are the parent and we need to work together in order for this relationship to work. I have a list of what is expected of me and what is expected of them. I hand it to them and have them sign and return it. I make them a copy of it to keep as well.
This is the list -
As a Childcare Provider I am expected to :
Provide care, love and nurturing to your child while you are unable to be with him.
Ensure that your child is clean and comfortable while in my care.
Ensure that your child has an opportunity to learn and play while in my care.
Provide a clean and safe environment for your child to explore.
Provide regular meal times, snack times and nap times.
Be available to care for your child during my hours of operation but for no more than 10 hours per day.
Treat your child as if he were my own while he is in my care.
As a parent you are expected to :
Put your child to bed at a reasonable time in order for him to be able to participate in activities while in my care.
Dress your child appropriately for childcare including proper outdoor clothing.
Provide a nutritious meal as well as snacks for your child.
Provide the items needed for me to properly care for your child.
Be on time to pick up your child. They miss you when you are gone.
Feed your child a nutritious breakfast before bringing your child to daycare.
Potty train your child when you feel the time is right. I am but a helper in this process and will follow your lead. Potty training is an intimate process that is best begun at home.
Most importantly - Spend as much time with your child as possible. Even though your child has a great time in my care, there is no substitute for a parent. No matter how much your child loves his daycare, he will always prefer spending time with you.
Let's work as a team and make childcare a great experience for everyone involved!