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EntropyControlSpecialist 08:33 AM 11-09-2012
For the past few weeks I have been the wicked witch in the parent's eyes.

This week started off so calm. No parents sending me angry e-mails/text messages/etc. due to me enforcing my policies. I felt like I was on vacation! It was so wonderful.

Then, this morning came. The disrespect that I receive through text messages and e-mails sometimes absolutely baffles me. I'm asked with great frequency by parents to disregard my policies.
No diapers? That's not the parent's problem. Figure it out, daycare lady.
No wipes? Not the parent's problem. I just need to make it work.
Late pick-up with no warning? Not the parent's problem. THEY pay ME, so I should suck it up.
Attempting to drop children off outside of the early drop off window but prior to us opening (1 extra hour of care in the morning FREE)? Not the parent's problem, they should be accepted.

I am exhausted from the bad behavior that a few of my clients have so lovingly given me lately. My assistant is as well.

TGIF!
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daycare 08:43 AM 11-09-2012
OMG...all I have to say, is stand your ground. Don't give in to them and keep on pushing. I am there right now with one family who is mad at me for enforcing the rules. Sorry, the rules apply to everyone, even YOU.

I saw the parent this morning at the grocery store, I was buying some ingredients to make cranberry bread today. Her DD came running up to me and almost plowed me to the ground she was so excited. I look at DCG and she is eating a huge choc doughnut. (this mom swears she never does this in the morning) The mom see me and says oh hi, grabs DCGs hand and walks off. NOt another word to me.

I don't care if you don't like me or my rules, I am not the only DC in town.

YES TGIF it has been one heck of a week.....
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Blackcat31 08:45 AM 11-09-2012
No diapers? That's not the parent's problem. Figure it out, daycare lady.

No problem parents. I can figure it out. It will be $2.00 per diaper that I supply.

No wipes? Not the parent's problem. I just need to make it work.

No problem parent, I can make it work but it'll be $1.00 per wipe until you supply them.

Late pick-up with no warning? Not the parent's problem. THEY pay ME, so I should suck it up.

I will suck it up no problem parent, but it will be sucked up easier when you pay me a $5 per minute late fee before you receive services again.

Attempting to drop children off outside of the early drop off window but prior to us opening (1 extra hour of care in the morning FREE)? Not the parent's problem, they should be accepted

I will gladly accept them but it cannot be for free. I think a good rate for early drop off should be about $15 per hour. That is acceptable.




Just smile and add a fee to every thing that they view as YOUR problem. I find dealing with probmlems so much easier the fatter my wallet is.

(Sorry, they are all giving you grief lately! )
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daycare 09:05 AM 11-09-2012
Like DC said....hit them where it hurts....
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My3cents 10:18 AM 11-09-2012
Originally Posted by EntropyControlSpecialist:
For the past few weeks I have been the wicked witch in the parent's eyes.

This week started off so calm. No parents sending me angry e-mails/text messages/etc. due to me enforcing my policies. I felt like I was on vacation! It was so wonderful.

Then, this morning came. The disrespect that I receive through text messages and e-mails sometimes absolutely baffles me. I'm asked with great frequency by parents to disregard my policies. How so, text back with a lot of no's. No- this doesn't work for me. No- that is not in my contract etc.... Don't allow this. I prefer verbal communication, maybe spell that out to them in a reply back.
No diapers? That's not the parent's problem. Figure it out, daycare lady. Wrong answer, call them at work and have them bring you diapers, or come get the child-
No wipes? Not the parent's problem. I just need to make it work. Same as above, call them at work. For wipes I would give them a note going home. Need wipes for tomorrow to attend- I am out-
Late pick-up with no warning? Not the parent's problem. THEY pay ME, so I should suck it up. Charge a fee for late pick up and require notice for late pick ups or a phone call. No phone call, fee doubles-
Attempting to drop children off outside of the early drop off window but prior to us opening (1 extra hour of care in the morning FREE)? Not the parent's problem, they should be accepted.Lock the door- simple, don't open it until one minute before your opening time. Don't allow for sitting in your driveway before after or in between.

I am exhausted from the bad behavior that a few of my clients have so lovingly given me lately. My assistant is as well. honestly I see it as you are allowing this to happen and not nipping it in the bud before it escalates. If you want respect from your clients you need to make things clear of what will and will not be tolerated. You will also end up getting good families because you follow through with your rules and are not wishy washy-No they are not going to like it when you give them a call at work that you need diapers but I bet it won't happen again. Snap fee's on and I bet they will be more prompt. (you have to have understanding for the truly things that do come up in life that are out of our control. I do. but....I don't have parents that abuse me either)

Try using a newsletter or note home to get points across. This way your not singling one person out. but......if you have to single you have to single. Marge, I have asked you repeatedly to bring in wipes for little Susie, if you can't bring in wipes tomorrow, I am going to charge wipes to your account and that will be due with your weekly payment. I can't do my job with out the things needed to care for your child. My cost for wipes would be more then what they go for in the stores for the inconvenience. There are ways to play games and get what you need with your parents(I usually try not to do this at all), or just be blunt, no wipes tomorrow- no service until wipes/diapers are brought in and you will still be charged for the day.


TGIF!
It was drilled into my head thanks to some very caring people on this forum-

Contract
Policy/Rule/handbook

Spell it out clear- Make it clear during your interviews-

Don't run your place unprofessional

I will respond in red to the above-

I looked at everything you said, and I feel like the blame should be put back on you for allowing this. Stop allowing it and your days will become much better.

Best- not trying to give you a hard time, but trying to help you to see that you don't have to put up with this behavior from your parents. If you don't want to be a doormat, then don't lie down-

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My3cents 10:24 AM 11-09-2012
YES TGIF it has been one heck of a week.....
Reply With Quote

It has!!! It is in the air for sure-

Hope everyone has a wonderful relaxing weekend-
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EntropyControlSpecialist 10:46 AM 11-09-2012
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
No diapers? That's not the parent's problem. Figure it out, daycare lady.

No problem parents. I can figure it out. It will be $2.00 per diaper that I supply.

No wipes? Not the parent's problem. I just need to make it work.

No problem parent, I can make it work but it'll be $1.00 per wipe until you supply them.

Late pick-up with no warning? Not the parent's problem. THEY pay ME, so I should suck it up.

I will suck it up no problem parent, but it will be sucked up easier when you pay me a $5 per minute late fee before you receive services again.

Attempting to drop children off outside of the early drop off window but prior to us opening (1 extra hour of care in the morning FREE)? Not the parent's problem, they should be accepted

I will gladly accept them but it cannot be for free. I think a good rate for early drop off should be about $15 per hour. That is acceptable.




Just smile and add a fee to every thing that they view as YOUR problem. I find dealing with probmlems so much easier the fatter my wallet is.

(Sorry, they are all giving you grief lately! )
I send electronic daily sheets home and give parents notice of WHEN they will run out of diapers and wipes and the day that they are needed by. Ex: Johnny has enough diapers to last until Tuesday. Please bring diapers on or before Tuesday!" I even bold it and put it in red.
There is a $20.00 convenience charge if you forget diapers OR wipes. I have had two parents have to pay this in the past month.

We have a $1.00/minute late fee. We do charge a reasonable fee if you are staying past our normal closing time until 6:00.

We don't charge for the early drop off to be accommodating since most of the parents do not live right by their jobs. Less than 5 families need it, and only one needs it every single day of the week.
I am really tempted to begin charging for it, though, just because I really don't enjoy it and it makes preparing for the day more difficult. This is why we made a 25 minute window that you have to be here by if you want your child to come early (for free!). If you are not, then you can come at our regular opening time. This is what I got in trouble for this morning. I was called unaccommodating, inflexible, etc.

As for standing my ground? I definitely do. It just really ticks the parents off.
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EntropyControlSpecialist 11:02 AM 11-09-2012
Originally Posted by My3cents:
It was drilled into my head thanks to some very caring people on this forum-

Contract
Policy/Rule/handbook

Spell it out clear- Make it clear during your interviews-

Don't run your place unprofessional

I will respond in red to the above-

I looked at everything you said, and I feel like the blame should be put back on you for allowing this. Stop allowing it and your days will become much better.

Best- not trying to give you a hard time, but trying to help you to see that you don't have to put up with this behavior from your parents. If you don't want to be a doormat, then don't lie down-
Our place is run very professionally and we have had contracts, a handbook, etc. in place since we opened. Our handbook is 9 pages long and the parents JUST signed a statement again in August saying they read the revisions and will abide by the policies.

Please know that this is not every family. I have some wonderful clients that respond kindly and with haste when a policy is broken. There is no hostility and no issues with them past them breaking it once.
Then, I have families that seem to go down the list of policies and break them one at a time. Every single time I correct the issue a temper tantrum occurs. Sometimes, they break it up. One policy broken, temper tantrum thrown, and they rest for a few months. Then, another policy is broken and another temper tantrum is thrown. At this point in time, I am feeling done with temper tantrums by adults. If they cannot speak to me kindly then they will have their two weeks notice.
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Blackcat31 12:24 PM 11-09-2012
Originally Posted by EntropyControlSpecialist:
I send electronic daily sheets home and give parents notice of WHEN they will run out of diapers and wipes and the day that they are needed by. Ex: Johnny has enough diapers to last until Tuesday. Please bring diapers on or before Tuesday!" I even bold it and put it in red.
There is a $20.00 convenience charge if you forget diapers OR wipes. I have had two parents have to pay this in the past month.

We have a $1.00/minute late fee. We do charge a reasonable fee if you are staying past our normal closing time until 6:00.

We don't charge for the early drop off to be accommodating since most of the parents do not live right by their jobs. Less than 5 families need it, and only one needs it every single day of the week.
I am really tempted to begin charging for it, though, just because I really don't enjoy it and it makes preparing for the day more difficult. This is why we made a 25 minute window that you have to be here by if you want your child to come early (for free!). If you are not, then you can come at our regular opening time. This is what I got in trouble for this morning. I was called unaccommodating, inflexible, etc.

As for standing my ground? I definitely do. It just really ticks the parents off.
I think you definitely have your ducks in a row and it is frustrating when you stand your ground only for parents to cop an attitide.

Just keep smiling and if necessary, raise your inconvenience fees just a wee bit so that it makes smiling easier.

I run a pretty tight ship here too and have no problem saying things to parents but there is definitely that fine line between being a total hard a$$ and being professional.....so the only alternative I could come up with was charging for anything extra and when a family becomes too complacent to care about the added fee, then I raise it.

It HAS to bother them somewhere (wallet, conscience etc) in order for them to stop doing it....and if they dont' stop, then atleast I am being paid well for dealing with it.
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EntropyControlSpecialist 12:38 PM 11-09-2012
I guess it just boils down to this: There are some things you couldn't pay me enough to do.

That includes having an open door policy for the full hour before I officially open. There is a time frame. If you are not here in that time frame then it is not my problem. I'm sorry, but it's not.

My policies are in place to make my days with the children run smoothly and are necessary in order for me to provide the best care I can for them. Obviously, I am very black and white. I can't even see gray and you know why. I do provide a little "give" WHEN a parent is deserving of it. In fact, I've made a couple of exceptions to the rules this past week for families that never have any issues. But, they didn't go ahead without my approval and break the policy. They told me their struggle and we developed a plan of action together. No one is getting the short end of the stick. Maybe I just feel like I don't deserve the short end of the stick by having people ignore my policies and then send disrespectful messages to me?

I used to have no backbone. But, in order to act "normal" I imitated others. I thought I had to be nice, bubbly, overly accommodating, etc. in order for me to be normal. Now, I don't care to. I am still very nice and bubbly but I just do not wish to bend over backwards to accommodate a family AFTER they have already broken my policy. I don't know if that makes me a hard A or not, but I do insist that my assistant read everything I write or send out to make sure that I am not TOO harsh. I fix the wording and how I say things accordingly.

I don't get how I have all these expectations heaped upon me when they are paying me $28 per day for full-time care. After taking out $4.00 for their meals and around $5.00 for taxes, I am left with $19.00 to pay the bills, pay for items needed, etc. I am certainly not in need of more funds, but you can't be serious that you think I owe you quite a bit when I really only make $19.00 for 9-10 hours of care. Praise the Lord for the food program which allows me to make back quite a bit of the money I spend for their food.
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Blackcat31 12:43 PM 11-09-2012
Originally Posted by EntropyControlSpecialist:
I guess it just boils down to this: There are some things you couldn't pay me enough to do.

That includes having an open door policy for the full hour before I officially open. There is a time frame. If you are not here in that time frame then it is not my problem. I'm sorry, but it's not.

My policies are in place to make my days with the children run smoothly and are necessary in order for me to provide the best care I can for them. Obviously, I am very black and white. I can't even see gray and you know why. I do provide a little "give" WHEN a parent is deserving of it. In fact, I've made a couple of exceptions to the rules this past week for families that never have any issues. But, they didn't go ahead without my approval and break the policy. They told me their struggle and we developed a plan of action together. No one is getting the short end of the stick. Maybe I just feel like I don't deserve the short end of the stick by having people ignore my policies and then send disrespectful messages to me?
I used to have no backbone. But, in order to act "normal" I imitated others. I thought I had to be nice, bubbly, overly accommodating, etc. in order for me to be normal. Now, I don't care to. I am still very nice and bubbly but I just do not wish to bend over backwards to accommodate a family AFTER they have already broken my policy. I don't know if that makes me a hard A or not, but I do insist that my assistant read everything I write or send out to make sure that I am not TOO harsh. I fix the wording and how I say things accordingly.
You are 100% correct in that you don't deserve the short end of the stick. Not ever. It is NOT ok for parents to disregard your rules.

I am just like you and I try to work WITH parents who deserve it (and the operative word is WITH) because it is a win-win for everyone.

But there will always be parents who will try to stretch the boundaries and if it is something I can live with, I charge for it and move on. If it is something I simply will not tolerate for any amount of money, I give them a strike (sometimes written to them and sometimes silently to myself) when they reach 3 strikes they are out and I don't look back.

You are doing great so stop feeling bad!!! Plus it is Friday so enjoy your weekend!!
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EntropyControlSpecialist 12:46 PM 11-09-2012
Here's the part that makes me chuckle. The parents who break the rules and then wonder why it is not okay afterwards always give me a list of things they have done for me.

We pay you well.
We brought items for the holiday party.
We pay you on time.

Even if one of those things is untrue, they still say it and think that means they can break the policies they wish to and it will be declared fine.


FRIDAY!!!! Our own child is going to his best friends for the weekend so I am looking forward to weekend alone with my honey! Until then, we have the Christmas music cranked up.

On a positive note, I did receive a very kind e-mail this afternoon from a Mom thanking me for all I do.
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Lilbutterflie 12:46 PM 11-09-2012
I am so sorry, friend! All I can say is- Hang in there! And thank goodness you have the support of your husband as your assistant! At least you know the two of you are in this together and you have him to support you (and he does a fabulous of it too!).

I just don't understand why parents are this way- so disrespectful and inconsiderate. And you have to deal with WAY more of them than I do.

HAPPY FRIDAY!!!!
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EntropyControlSpecialist 12:48 PM 11-09-2012
Originally Posted by Lilbutterflie:
I am so sorry, friend! All I can say is- Hang in there! And thank goodness you have the support of your husband as your assistant! At least you know the two of you are in this together and you have him to support you (and he does a fabulous of it too!).

I just don't understand why parents are this way- so disrespectful and inconsiderate. And you have to deal with WAY more of them than I do.

HAPPY FRIDAY!!!!
I do have a lot. 26 parents. Yikes. But, he was reassuring me that when he leaves we will downsize and I will only have a handful of parents which will lessen the headache. Plus, we are very picky about who accept now.
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