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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Help! I'm Totally Stumped!
DBug 04:51 AM 03-24-2012
I have a 2.5 yo DCB who is the cutest thing ever, but he throws these crazy tantrums that have started to get way out of hand. He'll fixate on one thing (eg. a toy someone else is playing with that he wants) and it will quickly spiral into a full-blown angry meltdown. He'll yell at me, pointing fingers and using gibberish words if he can't think of the right words to use. He doesn't say anything insulting, he doesn't use bad words, and he doesn't say things like "I hate you" or anything like that. He'll just scream that he wants the toy and he wants it now (or whatever he's worked up about). Yesterday was non-stop with the freak fits, and I really think it has alot to do with his sleep schedule. Here's the thing though -- he WON'T sleep.
While he's with me, during quiet time he either lays on a cot or in a playpen depending on his behaviour that day. We have an hour and 45 minutes of quiet time where everybody else is sleeping with our quiet time music playing. I'm usually sitting doing paperwork or surfing, so nothing distracting. But no matter where this dcb is, he will not sleep. I've had him on a cot 10 feet away from me, in a playpen in a bedroom by himself, and he will not go to sleep. He'll lay quietly for a bit, and then start moving around, kicking the wall, or screaming if he's in a bedroom where I can't shush him. I wouldn't be so concerned about his lack of sleeping though, if I didn't think he really needed it.
Bedtime routine sounds pretty good. Bedtime is 7:00, but dcm works evenings and gets home around 8 most nights. He waits up for her, even though he's been put to bed at bedtime, he'll stay awake in bed until she comes home to give him a kiss. It turns out that Thursday night dcm didn't get home til 9. They figured he was fast asleep, so she didn't go give him a kiss. When they went to bed closer to 10, he was STILL awake! And then of course, Friday here was a total write-off. He was beside himself, absolutely miserable, meltdown after meltdown. I laid him down at am nap time (he doesn't take a morning nap usually) and he screamed at me the whole time. I tried cuddling with him, but he didn't want to have any of that. And then again, at afternoon quiet time, he refused to sleep, but passed out for the last 15 minutes of it (and then I had to wake him for our bus run).
I've never seen a kid so obviously tired that will refuse to sleep like this. What should I do?? It seems like the days that we go to the park, go for walks, or do lots of fun things, he is LESS likely to go to sleep. The days that we're rained in (like Friday), he'll be bouncing off the walls (literally - he's a pretty hyper kid) but he'll sleep better (even that 15 minutes was better than nothing). When he wakes up though, he's in a foul mood, and it takes about a half hour for him to get back to normal.
I'm starting to wonder if he may be over-stimulated? Yesterday I gave him a space all to himself with a bucket of non-daycare toys (big boy robots and cars not safe for the little ones), and he focused on them for a good long time. I don't know, I totally stumped. I've never seen a kid quite like this. I've had hyper, crazy, tantrum-throwing kids before, but a good nap would always make things MUCH better.
Ideas??
While he's with me, during quiet time he either lays on a cot or in a playpen depending on his behaviour that day. We have an hour and 45 minutes of quiet time where everybody else is sleeping with our quiet time music playing. I'm usually sitting doing paperwork or surfing, so nothing distracting. But no matter where this dcb is, he will not sleep. I've had him on a cot 10 feet away from me, in a playpen in a bedroom by himself, and he will not go to sleep. He'll lay quietly for a bit, and then start moving around, kicking the wall, or screaming if he's in a bedroom where I can't shush him. I wouldn't be so concerned about his lack of sleeping though, if I didn't think he really needed it.
Bedtime routine sounds pretty good. Bedtime is 7:00, but dcm works evenings and gets home around 8 most nights. He waits up for her, even though he's been put to bed at bedtime, he'll stay awake in bed until she comes home to give him a kiss. It turns out that Thursday night dcm didn't get home til 9. They figured he was fast asleep, so she didn't go give him a kiss. When they went to bed closer to 10, he was STILL awake! And then of course, Friday here was a total write-off. He was beside himself, absolutely miserable, meltdown after meltdown. I laid him down at am nap time (he doesn't take a morning nap usually) and he screamed at me the whole time. I tried cuddling with him, but he didn't want to have any of that. And then again, at afternoon quiet time, he refused to sleep, but passed out for the last 15 minutes of it (and then I had to wake him for our bus run).
I've never seen a kid so obviously tired that will refuse to sleep like this. What should I do?? It seems like the days that we go to the park, go for walks, or do lots of fun things, he is LESS likely to go to sleep. The days that we're rained in (like Friday), he'll be bouncing off the walls (literally - he's a pretty hyper kid) but he'll sleep better (even that 15 minutes was better than nothing). When he wakes up though, he's in a foul mood, and it takes about a half hour for him to get back to normal.
I'm starting to wonder if he may be over-stimulated? Yesterday I gave him a space all to himself with a bucket of non-daycare toys (big boy robots and cars not safe for the little ones), and he focused on them for a good long time. I don't know, I totally stumped. I've never seen a kid quite like this. I've had hyper, crazy, tantrum-throwing kids before, but a good nap would always make things MUCH better.
Ideas??
Zoe 08:29 AM 03-24-2012
It sounds to me like he is being trained to stay awake since he stays up at least an hour every night waiting for mom to come kiss him good night. The only thing I can advise you to do is talk to the parents and see if he can go to bed when mom comes home, not an hour before and staying awake.
The other thing is to alter when you put him down. Maybe a slight time change will get him to nap well.
The other thing is to alter when you put him down. Maybe a slight time change will get him to nap well.
momof5 11:43 AM 03-24-2012
What you describe sounds EXACTLY like one little boy I have. He is the exact same as this. It is sooooooo frustrating! I KNOW mine needs sleep but he fights it too and is just so miserable ALL day long. I am looking forward to reading others advice on this as I feel some days that I am going to lose it and term him. The screaming/kicking/tantrum fits are really starting to make me feel burnt out!
DBug 04:19 AM 03-26-2012
Originally Posted by Zoe:
It sounds to me like he is being trained to stay awake since he stays up at least an hour every night waiting for mom to come kiss him good night. The only thing I can advise you to do is talk to the parents and see if he can go to bed when mom comes home, not an hour before and staying awake.
The other thing is to alter when you put him down. Maybe a slight time change will get him to nap well.
I hadn't thought of that -- being "trained" to stay awake. That's definitely something to consider.It sounds to me like he is being trained to stay awake since he stays up at least an hour every night waiting for mom to come kiss him good night. The only thing I can advise you to do is talk to the parents and see if he can go to bed when mom comes home, not an hour before and staying awake.
The other thing is to alter when you put him down. Maybe a slight time change will get him to nap well.
Unfortunately, we have a very specific window for nap time since we have to be up for the bus run at a certain time. So I can't put him down any later
Having a toy at nap time seems to help. It's totally against my rules, but I may have to bend them for this little guy.