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Old 04-02-2013, 02:38 PM
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tenderhearts tenderhearts is offline
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Default 2 yr old at Nap Time

I think I've asked for advise on this before but I can't remember. I have an almost 2 1/2 yr old dcb. He's generally a good little boy but in certain things he doesn't seem to "get" what I'm saying, such as if I tell him this is going to be the consequence of something he doesn't get it like the other kids his age and even younger.
Heres the problem I NEEEED for him to start napping in the room with the other kids, BUT he will NOT listen, he just plays around, he plays with his mat, the pillow, his blanket, each time he plays with something I take it away. He keeps another child up EVEN though there is a divider (which he has knocked over 3x now today at nap time) because he's a distraction. I have tried EVERYTHING I can think of to get him to listen and understand he NEEDS to be quiet in there, and nothing works, nothing, I've even have had my husband go in there and it doesn't work. I've tried bribery with a cookie if they are good at nap time they can have a cookie but HE doesn't get it. When I explain why after snack he doesn't get one he just doesn't get it. Would it be mean or wrong to tell him he can't play outside with the others because he's not behaving at nap time? I'm just not sure he'll understand.
I'm so frustrated with this because I have NEVER had this much trouble getting a child to listen at nap time ever and I've had a lot of kids that were difficult all day long. This particular boy is generally good. I know I should be thankful for that and I am, but I know he is tired. The moment I put him in another room, he's out like a light.
Every single day at nap time he'll tell me he wants to sleep in that room with the others and tell him ok but if you play around you will go in another room, he'll say no, like he understands me but plays around non stop.
Help please...... any other ideas????? No I can't sit with him in there because I have an infant awake at that time.
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Old 04-02-2013, 03:21 PM
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No, you can't withhold outdoor playtime for him, and I think it would be counterintuitive to do that...he needs the exercise to make him tired.

I would set up 2 beds for him for a week. One in the room with the other kids, one in a cozy corner away in another room. Bed 1 has a special pillow with nice colors, fun blanket. Bed 2 has a plain pillow, blanket. Drab if possible...lol.

Then, show him bed #2. Tell him "if you want to stay by your friends, you must be quiet so that they can sleep. Otherwise, I'll move you here."

Then tuck in as usual. Give him literally 5 minutes. If he's still messing around, move him. No extra warnings, just "you are not being quiet, so I can't let you stay with your friends".

Next day, same thing. I think you just have to be really consistent, and not give any extra warnings to milk.
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Old 04-02-2013, 03:39 PM
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Are you in the room til they fall asleep? (not judging, I just lay mine down and say goodnight and go watch on the monitor.) If you are, sit next to this one. Put your hand on him, giving him a little "hug" so he doesn't mess around. This is how my daughter got my son to nap with the other kids. I was astonished - it only took a couple minutes of him not moving and he was out. He was about 2 at the time. After a few times of this routine and after that he just went right to sleep without needing this "hug".

I feel for you, I have this kid right now. I know I need to move him out of his pack n play soon, but I tried and he behaved as you have described. Otherwise, he is the best behaved kid in care. He would also wake up early and get off his cot, and didn't understand that he needed to remain quietly on his cot...
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Old 04-02-2013, 03:45 PM
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Can you put him to sleep first? Say 10-15 mins before the other ones? I was doing that, putting my problem sleeper to sleep first before the other ones went in.
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Old 04-02-2013, 08:15 PM
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That's a really good idea, LittleD.

What about giving him something quiet to "fiddle" with, like a glitter wand or a taggie blanket?
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Old 04-03-2013, 07:14 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tenderhearts View Post
I think I've asked for advise on this before but I can't remember. I have an almost 2 1/2 yr old dcb. He's generally a good little boy but in certain things he doesn't seem to "get" what I'm saying, such as if I tell him this is going to be the consequence of something he doesn't get it like the other kids his age and even younger.
Heres the problem I NEEEED for him to start napping in the room with the other kids, BUT he will NOT listen, he just plays around, he plays with his mat, the pillow, his blanket, each time he plays with something I take it away. He keeps another child up EVEN though there is a divider (which he has knocked over 3x now today at nap time) because he's a distraction. I have tried EVERYTHING I can think of to get him to listen and understand he NEEDS to be quiet in there, and nothing works, nothing, I've even have had my husband go in there and it doesn't work. I've tried bribery with a cookie if they are good at nap time they can have a cookie but HE doesn't get it. When I explain why after snack he doesn't get one he just doesn't get it. Would it be mean or wrong to tell him he can't play outside with the others because he's not behaving at nap time? I'm just not sure he'll understand.
I'm so frustrated with this because I have NEVER had this much trouble getting a child to listen at nap time ever and I've had a lot of kids that were difficult all day long. This particular boy is generally good. I know I should be thankful for that and I am, but I know he is tired. The moment I put him in another room, he's out like a light.
Every single day at nap time he'll tell me he wants to sleep in that room with the others and tell him ok but if you play around you will go in another room, he'll say no, like he understands me but plays around non stop.
Help please...... any other ideas????? No I can't sit with him in there because I have an infant awake at that time.
I have a similar DC boy. In my case he is STILL in the PNP because I've tried to get him on the mat several times (I switch most kids by 2!!) but it was a disaster of EPIC proportions. I am going to put him in the main room but am waiting until he turns 3...This is a kid who when I say "It's outside time, let's go get our shoes!" will wander around the house saying in a vacant sort of way "outside, outside, outside" while everyone else (even the 20 month old!) is at the door either putting on their shoes, trying to put them on, or waiting for me to help them...I have to usually hunt him down to get his shoes on. But when I say "lunch time" he's the first at the table

Like you, I've tried it all - reminders (totally over his head) firm talk (right over his head) ignoring the noise (let's get louder!!) What worked here was taking him out of the room, bringing him to the kitchen table and having him sit. I went about my business and treated it like a night waking - no toys, no books, no eye contact, no lights, no tv, etc. I said nothing to him except an occasional "shhhh" I kept it BORING, BORING, BORING. I had to do this a couple of times before he understood that noise at nap = having to sit and be bored. He's still in his own room, but he is much better about being quiet so friends can sleep. He's also back to napping himself which makes a nice change (he's a whiny kid) and the nap helps. Good Luck!
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Old 04-03-2013, 08:36 AM
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Thanks everyone. I can't sit in there with him, I have an infant awake at this time. I do set up two beds, I don't show him both but I always tell him, if he lays quietly and doesn't play around he can stay in there, but if he starts playing around he goes into the other room. He doesn't care. He cares more about his teddy he uses at nap time BUT I've taken that away and he still doesn't care. I have tried putting him back in the pnp but he is even louder when I put him in there, he actually yells to the others, I don't know why that is but that's what he does. He just doesn't get anything I tell him or he just doesn't care. I have a dcg who just turned 3, she has been with me since she was 3 months old and when I transitioned her from pnp to floor mat she started playing around, talking and it worked putting her in another room, even at 23 mo, she did NOT like it, she wanted to be with her friends, I think it's a comfort to most of them to have the others in there, anyways it took about 3 days and she finally got it. This boy he just doesn't seem to care about any consequence, that's why I thought not allowing him to play outside which he LOVES loves loves would maybe do the trick but again I don't think this boy would understand it being a consequence of playing around at naptime, not to mention I wouldn't feel right about doing that. I just need something to click with him.
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Old 04-03-2013, 08:44 AM
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If he goes to sleep quickly in the other room, I would just keep him there. Is
The other room in a part of the house where he gets woke up easily or is it just an area you don't want to use for child care?
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Old 04-03-2013, 09:08 AM
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IT's an area of my house I don't want to use. It's my sons room right now, which is right down the entry way from where the daycare area is, in July our daughter is getting married so our son will be taking her room which is used for an infant right now. I really wanted to get her moved into his room (old room when he moves out into our daughters room) because it will be a spare room for us, my son is 16 so on his no school days he really likes to have his room.
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