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Old 10-12-2012, 02:58 PM
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Default Rules Or Consequences, Which Are More Important?

Question for everyone.

What do you feel is more important for a child to know?

The rules or the consequences? Or equal?

At what age do you expect for a child to take responsibility for their actions.

Do you have a set of rules in writing that you send home and ask your parents to follow through with?

Does it matter if the rules are different from home to daycare, same for the consequences??


Of course I have an issue and maybe should have explained that, however, I wanted to see your thoughts on my questions..
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Old 10-12-2012, 03:09 PM
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I think they are equal!

Case and point-two times this week I have had children goofing off in their chairs. With repeated warning that we don't do that-both fell out of the chairs and smacked their mouths pretty hard on the table. One already has a very gray tooth from doing this last year! Anyway, neither child cried as they knew what they did was wrong and if they had been following the rules they wouldn't have hit their mouths.

Rules are meant for our safety/consequences are the results of us not following the rules (person gets hurt)
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Old 10-12-2012, 03:40 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Country Kids View Post
I think they are equal!

Case and point-two times this week I have had children goofing off in their chairs. With repeated warning that we don't do that-both fell out of the chairs and smacked their mouths pretty hard on the table. One already has a very gray tooth from doing this last year! Anyway, neither child cried as they knew what they did was wrong and if they had been following the rules they wouldn't have hit their mouths.

Rules are meant for our safety/consequences are the results of us not following the rules (person gets hurt)
at what age do you expect for kids to understand and accept the consequences for their actions? both enforced and natural??
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Old 10-12-2012, 03:45 PM
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Natural consequences start at a very young age and they learn quickly.
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Old 10-12-2012, 03:49 PM
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Natural-infants I would think

Enforced- 2 1/2 and definetly by 3.
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Old 10-12-2012, 05:13 PM
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Infants learn very quickly, that there is a reaction for an action. "Consequences" if you like. I don't think you can really put an age on it as it's an ongoing process.

At first, the consequences of certain actions are attached to needs. Infant cries....food appears for example.

Later, the consequences are attached to wants and choices not just needs.

The consequences get more sophisticated as the action does.

I'm not really explaining myself very well (it's Friday and I'm tired)

But I think there isn't a magic age when rules and consequences kicks in. It's an ongoing life experience.
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Old 10-12-2012, 05:17 PM
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IMHO, the goal is to enforce the rules with consequences, consistently.

If nature supplies them, awesome. Johnny refuses snack. Johnny is hungry until lunch.

If they are not supplied naturally then it is up to us as providers. Johnny takes a toy from baby. Nature tells him he won. Mrs. Cat Herder takes toy and short term freedom from Johnny.
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