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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>DCG Wanted To Make Cupcakes
melissa ann 08:00 AM 01-27-2012
This morning I had a dcm text me asking if she could bring stuff in to make cupcakes because her daughter wanted to make some. The mom was tired last night and didn't want to make them. I told her no that we didn't have time. Ugh! What is wrong with people? I don't have time today. We have a church dinner tonight and I'm making a couple of loaves of bread. (Thank goodness for bread machines
)
Plus, we do preschool work and have my days planned out. The kids did help make some bread this morning. And we did read The little Hen to go with the bread, plus a project to go with it.
)Plus, we do preschool work and have my days planned out. The kids did help make some bread this morning. And we did read The little Hen to go with the bread, plus a project to go with it.
Blackcat31 08:36 AM 01-27-2012
Please don't take this the wrong way, but I think it would have been an awesome thing to do! Bonus that mom wanted to supply all the ingredients too! 
You could have been the hero for the day for that little girl.....imagine hearing that your mom is too tired to spend some time baking with you
I am all for structured routines and the fact that some providers do preschool activities but really, in all the structured preschool learning you have planned for the day, there was absolutely no room to take the time to do something a child wanted to do? I find that kind of sad, as that is the exact reason I am in this business in the first place....to make a difference in the life of a child.
I would skip daily lesson plans in a nano-second if the kids told me they would rather do something else...especially an activity like baking which in this age of fast-food and microwaves, it seems no one takes the time to do anymore.
What a great lesson plan that acttivity could have been too! Counting cupcakes, mixing colors together for frosting, sprinkling on the decorations, and the eager anticipation for them to finish baking so the kiddos could all enjoy a fresh warm cupcake that they had a hand in helping make....
THAT is the kind of preschool learning I would want for my child.
OP, I am NOT trying to be rude or snarky, I just think you are missing out on a wonderful opportunity to do something really special with a child.
You could have been the hero for the day for that little girl.....imagine hearing that your mom is too tired to spend some time baking with you
I am all for structured routines and the fact that some providers do preschool activities but really, in all the structured preschool learning you have planned for the day, there was absolutely no room to take the time to do something a child wanted to do? I find that kind of sad, as that is the exact reason I am in this business in the first place....to make a difference in the life of a child.
I would skip daily lesson plans in a nano-second if the kids told me they would rather do something else...especially an activity like baking which in this age of fast-food and microwaves, it seems no one takes the time to do anymore.
What a great lesson plan that acttivity could have been too! Counting cupcakes, mixing colors together for frosting, sprinkling on the decorations, and the eager anticipation for them to finish baking so the kiddos could all enjoy a fresh warm cupcake that they had a hand in helping make....
THAT is the kind of preschool learning I would want for my child.
OP, I am NOT trying to be rude or snarky, I just think you are missing out on a wonderful opportunity to do something really special with a child.
sharlan 08:43 AM 01-27-2012
To me, that's the joy of home daycare. We can stop and do those things with the kids.
melskids 08:46 AM 01-27-2012
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
Please don't take this the wrong way, but I think it would have been an awesome thing to do! Bonus that mom wanted to supply all the ingredients too!
You could have been the hero for the day for that little girl.....imagine hearing that your mom is too tired to spend some time baking with you
I am all for structured routines and the fact that some providers do preschool activities but really, in all the structured preschool learning you have planned for the day, there was absolutely no room to take the time to do something a child wanted to do? I find that kind of sad, as that is the exact reason I am in this business in the first place....to make a difference in the life of a child.
I would skip daily lesson plans in a nano-second if the kids told me they would rather do something else...especially an activity like baking which in this age of fast-food and microwaves, it seems no one takes the time to do anymore.
What a great lesson plan that acttivity could have been too! Counting cupcakes, mixing colors together for frosting, sprinkling on the decorations, and the eager anticipation for them to finish baking so the kiddos could all enjoy a fresh warm cupcake that they had a hand in helping make....
THAT is the kind of preschool learning I would want for my child.
OP, I am NOT trying to be rude or snarky, I just think you are missing out on a wonderful opportunity to do something really special with a child.
I completely agree! Please don't take this the wrong way, but I think it would have been an awesome thing to do! Bonus that mom wanted to supply all the ingredients too!
You could have been the hero for the day for that little girl.....imagine hearing that your mom is too tired to spend some time baking with you
I am all for structured routines and the fact that some providers do preschool activities but really, in all the structured preschool learning you have planned for the day, there was absolutely no room to take the time to do something a child wanted to do? I find that kind of sad, as that is the exact reason I am in this business in the first place....to make a difference in the life of a child.
I would skip daily lesson plans in a nano-second if the kids told me they would rather do something else...especially an activity like baking which in this age of fast-food and microwaves, it seems no one takes the time to do anymore.
What a great lesson plan that acttivity could have been too! Counting cupcakes, mixing colors together for frosting, sprinkling on the decorations, and the eager anticipation for them to finish baking so the kiddos could all enjoy a fresh warm cupcake that they had a hand in helping make....
THAT is the kind of preschool learning I would want for my child.
OP, I am NOT trying to be rude or snarky, I just think you are missing out on a wonderful opportunity to do something really special with a child.
I had a child come in last friday all excited about volcanos.
I ditched this weeks "plan" and we spent the week learning about volcanos instead. They paper maiched it all by themselves, and we erupted it on thursday.
They had a blast!
They get SO much more learning out of it when THEY take the lead, rather then if I were to. Its much more authentic, meaningful, and purposeful that way.
I shifted from teacher led, to child led a little over a year and a half ago. (thanks to other providers on here
) and now, I would never turn back. Totally JMO!
wdmmom 08:46 AM 01-27-2012
I think it's cool that they asked you before bringing it and expecting you to do it.
I can't say as I blame you though. I only have 3 children on Fridays so my day consists of cleaning, sanitizing and not much of anything else. If a parent asked me on Friday, I would have declined too but I would have made time to do it on Monday with them.
I can't say as I blame you though. I only have 3 children on Fridays so my day consists of cleaning, sanitizing and not much of anything else. If a parent asked me on Friday, I would have declined too but I would have made time to do it on Monday with them.
Heidi 08:47 AM 01-27-2012
I agree with Black cat, but I can understand that you would get thrown off by the request!
Cat Herder 08:48 AM 01-27-2012
I would have done it....UNLESS....
This was one of my past passive aggressive Moms and a child that I was having discipline issues with.
"Don't feed the Princess"....
(Think about the posts on "candy bribe to get out of car" toddler, "pink princess dress", "screamer", plus 3 years without intervention....
)
Other than that it could have been fun...even if I had to wait until Monday to do it so I had a bit more time. (Friday naptime/afternoons are floor waxing, windows and big laundry days in the playroom for me.... Quiet chaos and lot's of outside time.)
This was one of my past passive aggressive Moms and a child that I was having discipline issues with.
"Don't feed the Princess".... (Think about the posts on "candy bribe to get out of car" toddler, "pink princess dress", "screamer", plus 3 years without intervention.... )Other than that it could have been fun...even if I had to wait until Monday to do it so I had a bit more time. (Friday naptime/afternoons are floor waxing, windows and big laundry days in the playroom for me.... Quiet chaos and lot's of outside time.)
Blackcat31 08:52 AM 01-27-2012
Originally Posted by Catherder:
I would have done it....UNLESS....
This was one of my past passive aggressive Moms and a child that I was having discipline issues with. "Don't feed the Princess".... (Think about the posts on "candy bribe to get out of car" toddler, "pink princess dress", "screamer", plus 3 years without intervention.... )
Other than that it could have been fun...even if I had to wait until Monday to do it so I had a bit more time. (Friday naptime/afternoons are floor waxing, windows and big laundry days in the playroom for me.... Quiet chaos and lot's of outside time.)
Good point.... I would have done it....UNLESS....
This was one of my past passive aggressive Moms and a child that I was having discipline issues with.
"Don't feed the Princess".... (Think about the posts on "candy bribe to get out of car" toddler, "pink princess dress", "screamer", plus 3 years without intervention.... )Other than that it could have been fun...even if I had to wait until Monday to do it so I had a bit more time. (Friday naptime/afternoons are floor waxing, windows and big laundry days in the playroom for me.... Quiet chaos and lot's of outside time.)
mac60 08:55 AM 01-27-2012
So it is OK for the daycare provider to change her plans for the day to bake cupcakes at the mother's request, but it is not wrong that the child's own mom could not make time to bake them with her daughter the night before because she was "too tired", gees, it would of only taken an hour or so.
Many of us work hard to make a good program for our daycare kids, parents see their children 3 or 4 hours per day after work, and they can't make time for their own child, that to me seems very wrong.
I understand what some of you are saying about being the hero for the day, how much fun it would of been, etc, but to me it is the principle behind it, gee Mom can't seem to make time to bake cupcakes with daughter so we will dump it on the daycare provider. That is the part that is wrong.
Many of us work hard to make a good program for our daycare kids, parents see their children 3 or 4 hours per day after work, and they can't make time for their own child, that to me seems very wrong.
I understand what some of you are saying about being the hero for the day, how much fun it would of been, etc, but to me it is the principle behind it, gee Mom can't seem to make time to bake cupcakes with daughter so we will dump it on the daycare provider. That is the part that is wrong.
melissa ann 08:58 AM 01-27-2012
We did bake today. We made 2 loaves of bread this morning and will do another 2 this afternoon. The kids participated and each got to sample the bread.
The reason mom was tired last night. Let's see. she picked up at after 5 (late) took her daughter to McD's for supper because she really wanted to go and was being quite rude about it. Then went to Walmart so girl could pick out a new toy (so she would calm down and get her coat on to leave) This girl 99% of the time gets whatever she wants.
We do bake here. We make cupcakes when it's someone's b-day, and for holidays, or even when we have pj days. At least once a month we have cupcakes and I send a couple home to each family.
I did tell her that next week we could. But I had to make bread today for our church dinner. I'm sorry if my needs comes before a daycare family.
Btw, the girl is part time 3 days/week. She wasn't her Tue, went to her dad's instead. Normally, she would pay for that day anyway. This week she asked if she could bring her Wed to make up for Tue. I agreed. I ususally try to work with the parents, but I couldn't today. Everyday she brings dvds, toys etc even though I don't allow it. I gave up telling the mom everyday, nothing from home.
The reason mom was tired last night. Let's see. she picked up at after 5 (late) took her daughter to McD's for supper because she really wanted to go and was being quite rude about it. Then went to Walmart so girl could pick out a new toy (so she would calm down and get her coat on to leave) This girl 99% of the time gets whatever she wants.
We do bake here. We make cupcakes when it's someone's b-day, and for holidays, or even when we have pj days. At least once a month we have cupcakes and I send a couple home to each family.
I did tell her that next week we could. But I had to make bread today for our church dinner. I'm sorry if my needs comes before a daycare family.
Btw, the girl is part time 3 days/week. She wasn't her Tue, went to her dad's instead. Normally, she would pay for that day anyway. This week she asked if she could bring her Wed to make up for Tue. I agreed. I ususally try to work with the parents, but I couldn't today. Everyday she brings dvds, toys etc even though I don't allow it. I gave up telling the mom everyday, nothing from home.
Blackcat31 08:58 AM 01-27-2012
Originally Posted by mac60:
So it is OK for the daycare provider to change her plans for the day to bake cupcakes at the mother's request, but it is not wrong that the child's own mom could not make time to bake them with her daughter the night before because she was "too tired", gees, it would of only taken an hour or so.
Many of us work hard to make a good program for our daycare kids, parents see their children 3 or 4 hours per day after work, and they can't make time for their own child, that to me seems very wrong.
I understand what some of you are saying about being the hero for the day, how much fun it would of been, etc, but to me it is the principle behind it, gee Mom can't seem to make time to bake cupcakes with daughter so we will dump it on the daycare provider. That is the part that is wrong.
Mac you are right....it is really sad the child's mother couldn't take the time to bake with her child. I also understand the principle of it all, but what does that have to do with the child? She doesn't understand the principle of anything yet. So it is OK for the daycare provider to change her plans for the day to bake cupcakes at the mother's request, but it is not wrong that the child's own mom could not make time to bake them with her daughter the night before because she was "too tired", gees, it would of only taken an hour or so.
Many of us work hard to make a good program for our daycare kids, parents see their children 3 or 4 hours per day after work, and they can't make time for their own child, that to me seems very wrong.
I understand what some of you are saying about being the hero for the day, how much fun it would of been, etc, but to me it is the principle behind it, gee Mom can't seem to make time to bake cupcakes with daughter so we will dump it on the daycare provider. That is the part that is wrong.
She is the one who is suffering the consequences of her mom's tiredness. If it was all just principle, then the action taken to teach a lesson to someone should be directed at mom not the child.
melissa ann 08:58 AM 01-27-2012
Originally Posted by mac60:
So it is OK for the daycare provider to change her plans for the day to bake cupcakes at the mother's request, but it is not wrong that the child's own mom could not make time to bake them with her daughter the night before because she was "too tired", gees, it would of only taken an hour or so.
Many of us work hard to make a good program for our daycare kids, parents see their children 3 or 4 hours per day after work, and they can't make time for their own child, that to me seems very wrong.
I understand what some of you are saying about being the hero for the day, how much fun it would of been, etc, but to me it is the principle behind it, gee Mom can't seem to make time to bake cupcakes with daughter so we will dump it on the daycare provider. That is the part that is wrong.
Thank you! So it is OK for the daycare provider to change her plans for the day to bake cupcakes at the mother's request, but it is not wrong that the child's own mom could not make time to bake them with her daughter the night before because she was "too tired", gees, it would of only taken an hour or so.
Many of us work hard to make a good program for our daycare kids, parents see their children 3 or 4 hours per day after work, and they can't make time for their own child, that to me seems very wrong.
I understand what some of you are saying about being the hero for the day, how much fun it would of been, etc, but to me it is the principle behind it, gee Mom can't seem to make time to bake cupcakes with daughter so we will dump it on the daycare provider. That is the part that is wrong.
Daycaremomof2 08:59 AM 01-27-2012
I think the issue is more that the mom text you that morning and kind of wanted you to rearrange a portion of your day with an activity that was not discussed ahead of time.
If it was me, I would have done the cupcakes, just because I love baking and cooking, but it would depend on the day. She should have asked you a few days in advance
If it was me, I would have done the cupcakes, just because I love baking and cooking, but it would depend on the day. She should have asked you a few days in advance
Blackcat31 09:01 AM 01-27-2012
Originally Posted by melissa ann:
We did bake today. We made 2 loaves of bread this morning and will do another 2 this afternoon. The kids participated and each got to sample the bread.
The reason mom was tired last night. Let's she picked up at after 5 (late) took her daughter to McD's for supper because she really wanted to go and was being quite rude about it. Then went to Walmart so girl could pick out a new toy (so she would calm down and get her coat on to leave) This girl 99% of the time gets whatever she wants.
We do bake here. We make cupcakes when it's someone's b-day, and for holidays, or even when we have pj days. At least once a month we have cupcakes and I send a couple home to each family.
I did tell her that next week we could. But I had to make bread today for our church dinner. I'm sorry if my needs comes before a daycare family.
Btw, the girl is part time 3 days/week. She wasn't her Tue, went to her dad's instead. Normally, she would pay for that day anyway. This week she asked if she could bring her Wed to make up for Tue. I agreed. I ususally try to work with the parents, but I couldn't today. Everyday she brings dvds, toys etc even though I don't allow it. I gave up telling the mom everyday, nothing from home.
Melissa Ann, with that added information, I understand why you declined. We did bake today. We made 2 loaves of bread this morning and will do another 2 this afternoon. The kids participated and each got to sample the bread.
The reason mom was tired last night. Let's she picked up at after 5 (late) took her daughter to McD's for supper because she really wanted to go and was being quite rude about it. Then went to Walmart so girl could pick out a new toy (so she would calm down and get her coat on to leave) This girl 99% of the time gets whatever she wants.
We do bake here. We make cupcakes when it's someone's b-day, and for holidays, or even when we have pj days. At least once a month we have cupcakes and I send a couple home to each family.
I did tell her that next week we could. But I had to make bread today for our church dinner. I'm sorry if my needs comes before a daycare family.
Btw, the girl is part time 3 days/week. She wasn't her Tue, went to her dad's instead. Normally, she would pay for that day anyway. This week she asked if she could bring her Wed to make up for Tue. I agreed. I ususally try to work with the parents, but I couldn't today. Everyday she brings dvds, toys etc even though I don't allow it. I gave up telling the mom everyday, nothing from home.
I didn't realize the entire situation from your original post.
Obviously the real issue wasn't baking, it was with the mother's behavior.
Like I said, I wasnt trying to chastise you for anything...just adding another perspective.
melissa ann 09:02 AM 01-27-2012
Sometimes my own kids (7 & 4) will want to do something. Play a game, go to the playground etc. But, there are times I can't full fill their requests. It's not being mean. But kids have to learn that they can't always do what they want.
Heidi 09:13 AM 01-27-2012
Originally Posted by melissa ann:
Sometimes my own kids (7 & 4) will want to do something. Play a game, go to the playground etc. But, there are times I can't full fill their requests. It's not being mean. But kids have to learn that they can't always do what they want.
You are 100% there, lady, and with the added info, I think you did the right thing! Sorry if you felt misunderstood when you just wanted to vent! Sometimes my own kids (7 & 4) will want to do something. Play a game, go to the playground etc. But, there are times I can't full fill their requests. It's not being mean. But kids have to learn that they can't always do what they want.
melskids 09:20 AM 01-27-2012
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
Melissa Ann, with that added information, I understand why you declined.
I didn't realize the entire situation from your original post.
Obviously the real issue wasn't baking, it was with the mother's behavior.
Like I said, I wasnt trying to chastise you for anything...just adding another perspective.
Me too. I hope you dont think I was judging you. Melissa Ann, with that added information, I understand why you declined.
I didn't realize the entire situation from your original post.
Obviously the real issue wasn't baking, it was with the mother's behavior.
Like I said, I wasnt trying to chastise you for anything...just adding another perspective.
I guess I took it the wrong way at first. I pictured this cute little perfect innocent cherub of a girl bouncing in the house all excited wanting to make cupcakes. Not always the case, huh?! lol
I agree with not giving them everything they want all the time, and I would probably have wanted to teach her a little delayed gradification myself.
mac60 09:35 AM 01-27-2012
I know many of us have birthday celebrations for the kids. I always have, mostly cupcakes or muffins and sing Happy Birthday, very simple. I don't have a problem with that, always done it probably always will. But why oh why, when little Johnny goes to "real preschool", he takes all kinds of special treats for his birthday, but never to daycare. Why is it not important for the daycare family too. I do understand Blackcat your point that the child is the one who is hurting because mom "just doesn't have time", but really I can no longer make "mom's problem mine.
I will say, that I am sure many of us go above and beyond what is actually "expected" of a daycare provider, like when I had a school kid and his mom never sent him hat and gloves, or in a warm shirt, or in regular socks.....So as a provider and a loving caring person, I bought him hat and gloves that were left at my home for him to use each day, I bought him socks so that he would have socks that covered above his ankles when he stood out in the snow waiting for the bus, and I bought him sweatshirts to put over the tee shirt his mom would put on him when it was frigid cold, all because I cared and his mom was simply stupid for lack of better terms. It takes a special kind of person to do this job, and I think once we do it for years, we learn that we just sometimes have to say no. Not because we don't care, but because maybe it just simply wasn't in the plans that day.
Didn't mean to take over the thread here, just some things I was thinking about as I read thru the posts.
I will say, that I am sure many of us go above and beyond what is actually "expected" of a daycare provider, like when I had a school kid and his mom never sent him hat and gloves, or in a warm shirt, or in regular socks.....So as a provider and a loving caring person, I bought him hat and gloves that were left at my home for him to use each day, I bought him socks so that he would have socks that covered above his ankles when he stood out in the snow waiting for the bus, and I bought him sweatshirts to put over the tee shirt his mom would put on him when it was frigid cold, all because I cared and his mom was simply stupid for lack of better terms. It takes a special kind of person to do this job, and I think once we do it for years, we learn that we just sometimes have to say no. Not because we don't care, but because maybe it just simply wasn't in the plans that day.
Didn't mean to take over the thread here, just some things I was thinking about as I read thru the posts.
Heidi 10:29 AM 01-27-2012
Originally Posted by mac60:
I know many of us have birthday celebrations for the kids. I always have, mostly cupcakes or muffins and sing Happy Birthday, very simple. I don't have a problem with that, always done it probably always will. But why oh why, when little Johnny goes to "real preschool", he takes all kinds of special treats for his birthday, but never to daycare. Why is it not important for the daycare family too. I do understand Blackcat your point that the child is the one who is hurting because mom "just doesn't have time", but really I can no longer make "mom's problem mine.
I will say, that I am sure many of us go above and beyond what is actually "expected" of a daycare provider, like when I had a school kid and his mom never sent him hat and gloves, or in a warm shirt, or in regular socks.....So as a provider and a loving caring person, I bought him hat and gloves that were left at my home for him to use each day, I bought him socks so that he would have socks that covered above his ankles when he stood out in the snow waiting for the bus, and I bought him sweatshirts to put over the tee shirt his mom would put on him when it was frigid cold, all because I cared and his mom was simply stupid for lack of better terms. It takes a special kind of person to do this job, and I think once we do it for years, we learn that we just sometimes have to say no. Not because we don't care, but because maybe it just simply wasn't in the plans that day.
Didn't mean to take over the thread here, just some things I was thinking about as I read thru the posts.
It's in our nature to be givers, I think. I know sometimes when "visitors" read the negative threads here, that is all they see. We don't go around bragging about how we bought someone gloves, or that we cooked a dinner for our daycare families with the kids to give a working mom a night off (I did that once, but I'm not bragging..lol). I know many of us have birthday celebrations for the kids. I always have, mostly cupcakes or muffins and sing Happy Birthday, very simple. I don't have a problem with that, always done it probably always will. But why oh why, when little Johnny goes to "real preschool", he takes all kinds of special treats for his birthday, but never to daycare. Why is it not important for the daycare family too. I do understand Blackcat your point that the child is the one who is hurting because mom "just doesn't have time", but really I can no longer make "mom's problem mine.
I will say, that I am sure many of us go above and beyond what is actually "expected" of a daycare provider, like when I had a school kid and his mom never sent him hat and gloves, or in a warm shirt, or in regular socks.....So as a provider and a loving caring person, I bought him hat and gloves that were left at my home for him to use each day, I bought him socks so that he would have socks that covered above his ankles when he stood out in the snow waiting for the bus, and I bought him sweatshirts to put over the tee shirt his mom would put on him when it was frigid cold, all because I cared and his mom was simply stupid for lack of better terms. It takes a special kind of person to do this job, and I think once we do it for years, we learn that we just sometimes have to say no. Not because we don't care, but because maybe it just simply wasn't in the plans that day.
Didn't mean to take over the thread here, just some things I was thinking about as I read thru the posts.
It's one thing to change plans quickly to make a child who doesn't expect much happy, but to be expected to change plans for a mother and a child who pretty much demand it is another thing.
I think everyone has one common quality. We all want to GIVE things, not have it TAKEN. What a huge difference, eh?
countrymom 11:13 AM 01-27-2012
you did nothing wrong. That mom is really missing out making those cupcakes with her dd. I do alot of baking all the time. I do it with the dck's or my own children. But if I already have things planned for the day, well if *I* have time then we will do other things.
By the sounds of it, I don't think the mom was just saying that she was tired, she was saying that, "oh, since your home and have nothing to do then you can make them with suzy" and where did her dd get the idea of cupcakes, I know kids think of crazy things, but I have a feeling that this was planned.
By the sounds of it, I don't think the mom was just saying that she was tired, she was saying that, "oh, since your home and have nothing to do then you can make them with suzy" and where did her dd get the idea of cupcakes, I know kids think of crazy things, but I have a feeling that this was planned.
youretooloud 03:28 PM 01-27-2012
If I were already planning to bake today, I would have also said no. Bread is enough for one day's work, and the extra bowls and clean up wouldn't appeal to me on a Friday.
Heck, I don't even like to give the kids lunch on Friday, much less bake cakes.
Heck, I don't even like to give the kids lunch on Friday, much less bake cakes.