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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>The Nerve.......
providerandmomof4 04:53 AM 10-31-2013
So I've read posts before in which dcp came into the dc home when the provider wasn't there and tried to leave their children. I read these posts with a mixture of gasps...and head shaking....and then it happened to me yesterday.
I was taking my daughter to school, as I do every school day and my dcp are aware of this. I have one fairly new family that have their drop off very close to time to take my daughter to school. They are supposed to be here at 8:30 to go with us, or wait until 9:00 when we return. This has been a problem and I had to get flat out blunt last week, and tell dcm that if she wanted to drop off before I left, that she would have to get to my house earlier. (She want to roll up right as I'm backing out of the drive!)
So yesterday; she texts: Hey, we won't be there until 9:00.
Okay, good, I don't have to worry about getting them loaded up. (Sigh of relief..)
When I return home, dcm car is in front of my house but her and the kids aren't in it??
So I go in, thinking that my grown daughter had let them in. The kids are eating fruit and I'm thinking that my daughter had got them fixed up and dcm leaves.
Come to find out....my daughter was downstairs doing laundry and dcm just lets herself and the kids in, helps herself and the kids to some fruit (which dcb was eating in the living room, which I only allow eating in the kitchen) and just made herself at home. My daughter was surprised and shocked when she came upstairs and there they were!!
What the!?
I told my daughter that I would be locking the door from now on and not to let anyone in, if I'm not there!!
I just really feel like this is overstepping dcp boundaries. This is my personal home. You don't just come in when I'm not there, and you know I'm not there. Geez lady!
I was taking my daughter to school, as I do every school day and my dcp are aware of this. I have one fairly new family that have their drop off very close to time to take my daughter to school. They are supposed to be here at 8:30 to go with us, or wait until 9:00 when we return. This has been a problem and I had to get flat out blunt last week, and tell dcm that if she wanted to drop off before I left, that she would have to get to my house earlier. (She want to roll up right as I'm backing out of the drive!)
So yesterday; she texts: Hey, we won't be there until 9:00.
Okay, good, I don't have to worry about getting them loaded up. (Sigh of relief..)
When I return home, dcm car is in front of my house but her and the kids aren't in it??
So I go in, thinking that my grown daughter had let them in. The kids are eating fruit and I'm thinking that my daughter had got them fixed up and dcm leaves. Come to find out....my daughter was downstairs doing laundry and dcm just lets herself and the kids in, helps herself and the kids to some fruit (which dcb was eating in the living room, which I only allow eating in the kitchen) and just made herself at home. My daughter was surprised and shocked when she came upstairs and there they were!!
What the!?
I told my daughter that I would be locking the door from now on and not to let anyone in, if I'm not there!!
I just really feel like this is overstepping dcp boundaries. This is my personal home. You don't just come in when I'm not there, and you know I'm not there. Geez lady!
coolconfidentme 05:02 AM 10-31-2013
Originally Posted by providerandmomof4:
So I've read posts before in which dcp came into the dc home when the provider wasn't there and tried to leave their children. I read these posts with a mixture of gasps...and head shaking....and then it happened to me yesterday.
I was taking my daughter to school, as I do every school day and my dcp are aware of this. I have one fairly new family that have their drop off very close to time to take my daughter to school. They are supposed to be here at 8:30 to go with us, or wait until 9:00 when we return. This has been a problem and I had to get flat out blunt last week, and tell dcm that if she wanted to drop off before I left, that she would have to get to my house earlier. (She want to roll up right as I'm backing out of the drive!)
So yesterday; she texts: Hey, we won't be there until 9:00.
Okay, good, I don't have to worry about getting them loaded up. (Sigh of relief..)
When I return home, dcm car is in front of my house but her and the kids aren't in it?? So I go in, thinking that my grown daughter had let them in. The kids are eating fruit and I'm thinking that my daughter had got them fixed up and dcm leaves.
Come to find out....my daughter was downstairs doing laundry and dcm just lets herself and the kids in, helps herself and the kids to some fruit (which dcb was eating in the living room, which I only allow eating in the kitchen) and just made herself at home. My daughter was surprised and shocked when she came upstairs and there they were!!
What the!?
I told my daughter that I would be locking the door from now on and not to let anyone in, if I'm not there!! I just really feel like this is overstepping dcp boundaries. This is my personal home. You don't just come in when I'm not there, and you know I'm not there. Geez lady!
I now lock the door when I go to the bathroom, even if hubby is on the bus stop with SA. (he has a key or can us the side door)So I've read posts before in which dcp came into the dc home when the provider wasn't there and tried to leave their children. I read these posts with a mixture of gasps...and head shaking....and then it happened to me yesterday.
I was taking my daughter to school, as I do every school day and my dcp are aware of this. I have one fairly new family that have their drop off very close to time to take my daughter to school. They are supposed to be here at 8:30 to go with us, or wait until 9:00 when we return. This has been a problem and I had to get flat out blunt last week, and tell dcm that if she wanted to drop off before I left, that she would have to get to my house earlier. (She want to roll up right as I'm backing out of the drive!)
So yesterday; she texts: Hey, we won't be there until 9:00.
Okay, good, I don't have to worry about getting them loaded up. (Sigh of relief..)
When I return home, dcm car is in front of my house but her and the kids aren't in it??
So I go in, thinking that my grown daughter had let them in. The kids are eating fruit and I'm thinking that my daughter had got them fixed up and dcm leaves. Come to find out....my daughter was downstairs doing laundry and dcm just lets herself and the kids in, helps herself and the kids to some fruit (which dcb was eating in the living room, which I only allow eating in the kitchen) and just made herself at home. My daughter was surprised and shocked when she came upstairs and there they were!!
What the!?
I told my daughter that I would be locking the door from now on and not to let anyone in, if I'm not there!!
I just really feel like this is overstepping dcp boundaries. This is my personal home. You don't just come in when I'm not there, and you know I'm not there. Geez lady!
Shell 05:47 AM 10-31-2013
Wow dcm needs a firm talking to about agreed upon drop off times and absolutely no going inside your house when you're not there. I would give her one more chance, but any incidences after this one, I would term. I would also make sure you lock the door to prevent this from happening, but she needs to understand that it 's your personal home and not just a business!
dcm needs a firm talking to about agreed upon drop off times and absolutely no going inside your house when you're not there. I would give her one more chance, but any incidences after this one, I would term. I would also make sure you lock the door to prevent this from happening, but she needs to understand that it 's your personal home and not just a business!
daycarediva 05:53 AM 10-31-2013
This happened to me ONCE years ago. Had a family with a scheduled DO of 6am on MWF and 8a on T/TH show up on a t or th (don't remember) and leave the kids in my playroom while I was in the shower.
MotherNature 05:56 AM 10-31-2013
How rude! Especially to just eat in your living room. I eat in mine, but don't assume everyone does, and would never presume to do so at another's house. I also have hard wood floors, so that makes a difference.
Blackcat31 06:05 AM 10-31-2013
Seriously?!
I'm sorry but there is NO way I'd keep that family. That is the most brazen show of disrespect I've ever read about!!
It's one thing to let yourself in and wait in the entry way or something but to actually help herself/children to food????
No way!! I'd HAVE to term. I couldn't work with someone who had such blurry boundaries with me.
I'm really sorry this happened to you.
I'm sorry but there is NO way I'd keep that family. That is the most brazen show of disrespect I've ever read about!!
It's one thing to let yourself in and wait in the entry way or something but to actually help herself/children to food????
No way!! I'd HAVE to term. I couldn't work with someone who had such blurry boundaries with me.
I'm really sorry this happened to you.
JenNJ 07:01 AM 10-31-2013
Oh heck no! I would have walked in and termed on the spot.
Willow 07:05 AM 10-31-2013
Immediate term.
Period.
Just........holy crap.........
Period.
Just........holy crap.........
Unregistered 07:08 AM 10-31-2013
I have never had that happen to me thankfully! My best quality about myself is my patience but if a parent did that to me I would loose my cool! My parents aren't allowed past the living room entrance.
GKJNIGMN 09:46 AM 10-31-2013
I have a DCD that does stuff like that. He has let his son into the house without checking if anyone was home. And already been gone by the time I realized the kid was there. The other morning my boyfriend was making breakfast and happened to notice a truck that looked like his driving down the street. He walked to the front to check the porch just because he had a feeling. The father had literally opened the door, kicked the son out of the car and drove off. The kid was out playing in the unfenced front yard by a street. I had already given him notice I was terminating the week before or he would have gotten a letter that day lol
melilley 11:15 AM 10-31-2013
I don't know how people don't feel stupid doing things like this!
cheerfuldom 01:53 PM 10-31-2013
i just really don't get it. I haven't had parents leave kids here but I have parents wander in my home during pickup and dropoff while i am here, or let their kids play in my yard and garage after pickup. I really dont get it. I would NEVER go anywhere in anyone's home without being invited. I would never do this in a business either. Do they just wander thru employee only areas at Walmart too?
nanglgrl 02:21 PM 10-31-2013
It's never happened to me. Yet. Lol. I literally just knocked on wood. Another procider I know had taken a day off for her moms funeral, she told the parents and put a note on the door. Early that morning she had a feeling, opened her door and found 2 kids playing on her enclosed porch. She couldn't get ahold of the parents and had to take them to her mothers funeral!
Sunshine75 07:01 PM 10-31-2013
No way....a funeral! Crazy! I would be driving the kids to the moms work and saying, "I think you forgot something" Lol. On a serious note this issue is a huge liability and whatever angle you have to play do it. If something happens to a child while they are in your home it is your liability whether parents are there or not. I would say if you do that again immediate termination will occur.
hope 07:33 PM 10-31-2013
Originally Posted by nanglgrl:
It's never happened to me. Yet. Lol. I literally just knocked on wood. Another procider I know had taken a day off for her moms funeral, she told the parents and put a note on the door. Early that morning she had a feeling, opened her door and found 2 kids playing on her enclosed porch. She couldn't get ahold of the parents and had to take them to her mothers funeral!
Wow, this is crazy! I have taken children on holidays, my days off, early and late before. Not so proud of those decisions but I was a little more naive when making them. But to take to a funeral???? I would have called emergency contacts and then child protection services.It's never happened to me. Yet. Lol. I literally just knocked on wood. Another procider I know had taken a day off for her moms funeral, she told the parents and put a note on the door. Early that morning she had a feeling, opened her door and found 2 kids playing on her enclosed porch. She couldn't get ahold of the parents and had to take them to her mothers funeral!
It is one thing when it is an inconvenience for us providers but a whole new story when it is not good for the child. Children should not be at a funeral.
Lucy 08:05 PM 10-31-2013
I have a mom who is capable of doing this. She's one who will just walk right in and act like it's her home. She's never come in when I wasn't home, but I wouldn't put it past her.
Today, none of my kids came back after school. (5 kids, 3 families). They all got picked up at school to begin their trick-or-treating in daylight. So I was off at 12:50 when I took my Kinders to school. (Yeah me!!) Anyway, my husband gets home before the kids get here after school, and I wasn't going to be here. He usually goes in his garage/shop and works on a project. After I left, I just had this weird feeling that the above-mentioned mom wouldn't give a second thought to just popping in and picking up some stuff her kids had here (treats from the other kids, pictures her youngest one had drawn, a book her older one had left, etc.) So I called hubby and told him to lock the front door because I just know this mom would think it was no big deal to come by, come in, get the kids' stuff, and leave. I have no idea if she even tried, but as I said, I totally wouldn't put it past her.
As far as them doing a drive-by in the morning... I had one kid who was dropped off by his teenage uncle in the mornings. Most times, he would be driving down the street before the kid even got to my front door. Once, he arrived only a couple minutes before high school was to start, and I swear he darn near did a literal drive-by drop off - meaning he "might" have come to a complete stop (barely) and the kid no sooner had a foot on the ground and the teen uncle peeled out. I immediately called Grandma (who had custody) and said NO WAY. He is to stop, and either see me waving in the window or at the front door before he drives away.
Today, none of my kids came back after school. (5 kids, 3 families). They all got picked up at school to begin their trick-or-treating in daylight. So I was off at 12:50 when I took my Kinders to school. (Yeah me!!) Anyway, my husband gets home before the kids get here after school, and I wasn't going to be here. He usually goes in his garage/shop and works on a project. After I left, I just had this weird feeling that the above-mentioned mom wouldn't give a second thought to just popping in and picking up some stuff her kids had here (treats from the other kids, pictures her youngest one had drawn, a book her older one had left, etc.) So I called hubby and told him to lock the front door because I just know this mom would think it was no big deal to come by, come in, get the kids' stuff, and leave. I have no idea if she even tried, but as I said, I totally wouldn't put it past her.
As far as them doing a drive-by in the morning... I had one kid who was dropped off by his teenage uncle in the mornings. Most times, he would be driving down the street before the kid even got to my front door. Once, he arrived only a couple minutes before high school was to start, and I swear he darn near did a literal drive-by drop off - meaning he "might" have come to a complete stop (barely) and the kid no sooner had a foot on the ground and the teen uncle peeled out. I immediately called Grandma (who had custody) and said NO WAY. He is to stop, and either see me waving in the window or at the front door before he drives away.
coolconfidentme 03:06 AM 11-01-2013
Doesn't everyone ave to sign in or something?
Laurel 04:24 AM 11-01-2013
Originally Posted by Sunshine75:
No way....a funeral! Crazy! I would be driving the kids to the moms work and saying, "I think you forgot something" Lol. On a serious note this issue is a huge liability and whatever angle you have to play do it. If something happens to a child while they are in your home it is your liability whether parents are there or not. I would say if you do that again immediate termination will occur.
My inspector was here last week and she said she had a provider who took 4 children to a funeral. She also came to a house where there were 28 children. When my eyes bugged out she said that this lady was going to open up a center soon and was 'stocking up' on children so she would have some to start her center. No way....a funeral! Crazy! I would be driving the kids to the moms work and saying, "I think you forgot something" Lol. On a serious note this issue is a huge liability and whatever angle you have to play do it. If something happens to a child while they are in your home it is your liability whether parents are there or not. I would say if you do that again immediate termination will occur.
Just threw that in cause it was so weird.Laurel
EntropyControlSpecialist 05:44 AM 11-01-2013
I would have been speechless.
LK5kids 11:55 AM 11-01-2013
Nutty, crazy, rude parent!