Had a daycare parent try to discipline your own child?! Dad came to pick up and my daughter wanted to go outside and I told her she needs a coat and shoes first then she can. She got her shoes on and started towards the door I reminded her to get her coat when the dad snapped at her and said go get your coat. I'm still shocked! Maybe he was having a bad day? Am I over reacting?

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I would be so mad if he snapped at her! It's not his right to do that. I could see if he said it nicely, like "I think your mom wants you to get your cost first", but to snap, no way!

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Ummm he isnt in charge of your child EVER so he should be saying nothing.

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Yeah I guess it all depends on the meaning of snap!? I would never want someone else to snap at my kids, period. I don't even like my neighbors yelling at my kids for stuff. Come to me!! I'm right here!!

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I'd be upset. My child is MY job MY responsibility. It sounds like you were already handling the situation.. not sure why he felt the need to step in at all. On the other hand, there have been several times when I've done the same thing instinctively with my niece or nephews (not snapped, but started to discipline) because sometimes the Daycare Lady comes out... but I correct myself and apologize to their parents.

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Had that happen once with a dcm and my ds. The funny thing.....her child was and still is my worst behaved. Going out on a limb here, but maybe....just...maybe... they should start with their own children!?

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I correct children around me, I just can't stop myself! however, this is reserved for kids that are being scary unsafe or are hurting my kids. Anyway, in this case, I would just talk to the dad. Give him the benefit of the doubt that he was just trying to help but also emphasize that it is not acceptable.

"John, I was thinking about the situation yesterday when you said something to Sophia about getting her coat. I am sure you were just trying to help but it made me uncomfortable for you to be correcting other children while you are here. I would feel the same way if you corrected one of the other daycare children, not just my own child. I am going to ask for you to let me handle it in the future. Again, I think you were just trying to help but I felt better addressing it now just so it won't be an issue in the future. Thanks for understanding"

He will probably back off but if he gets snarky, I would just say "Taking care of the children here is MY job so I need you to respect that and allow me to do my job"

Emphasize that this is about him correcting other children besides his own, not about the fact that this was your own child. His behavior really isn't acceptable

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Maybe he was just trying to "back you up", and the hectic-ness of getting his own kiddo out the door made him just say it quick...get caught up in the moment?

I guess I would base my reaction on how he is in general. If he's normally respectful, I'd honestly let it go. He may have been trying to help.

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Well, if you are not allowed any daycare parents try to discipline your own child then why do you think you are ok to discipline the daycare parents' own children, not them??

I am sure he is trying to help you. I would let it go...

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I'd think disciplining (which comes from the word 'disciple' which means "to teach") your child would be one thing if it was at his house and she was breaking one of his house rules and he was trying to set a boundary (just like you do with his children when they are in your home). Or if you let him watch her or something like that, but not in your home and definitely not snapping at her.

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I strongly agree with Starburst.

If he actually snapped at her as in yelling, no.

If he firmly backed you up and reiterated your instruction, yes.

I correct children whenever I feel they need redirection, guidance, correction or there is a safety issue. Their parents present or not I tell them what is right. Part of the reason, I was a pretty good kid is others (neighbors, strangers, acquaintances) backed up my mother with giving me instruction, correction and even a butt swat. I know the butt swat is totally unacceptable by today’s standards.

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Agreed. I think he was backing you up, which is nice when things are crazy at pick up. But to snap? Absolutely not. If it happens again, I would have a conversation with him about allowing you to do your job and how you don't think the other parents would be appreciative of someone besides you correcting their child.

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I would have snapped on him...

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I agree. Yes, I would let it go unless it became a pattern.

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Thank you ladies! He actually snapped at her when I was in the middle of my sentence telling her to go get her coat. I will let it go unless it happens again.

I do understand that I redirect and disapline the daycare children and his daughter but not how he does it and I would never interrupt a parent disaplining/redirecting their own child. That's what upset me the most, then the snapping. Had I been busy doing something else or I missed it then I wouldn't have minded as much.

His little girl is only 18 months so she hasn't hit the bad behavior yet. He does work with special needs kids in high school so I'm thinking he must have just had a bad day.

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