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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Bad nannies
preschoolteacher 11:53 AM 08-13-2014
Either I wasn't paying attention last summer or the nannies in my city are just REALLY bad this year.

I live in a big city near several well-to-do neighborhoods full of parents who (as a generalization) are progressive (cloth diapering, organic food feeding) and very committed to/involved with their children. When we go on field trips to the parks in these neighborhoods, it's nanny central. People have money to pay $15/hour for a nanny to watch their kids, but I feel so bad for the parents because I'm sure they are oblivious to what is happening. They're expecting one-on-one quality time for their kids. They do not seem to be getting that.

The nannies come to the park to talk to each other. I see the same nannies constantly hanging out with their other nanny friends. The ones who don't have nanny friends are on their phones (facebook, texting, etc.)--CONSTANTLY.

So in just one park trip, I saw a nanny pushing a baby in a swing with a blank, faraway stare as the baby babbled and giggled and tried to get her attention. Two preschoolers climbed to the top of a tall structure while the nanny was on her phone, and then she yelled at them and said "I need more caffeine if I have to deal with you two today." Another nanny snapped at a 3-year-old with Down's Syndrome when he began sucking on the wrapper from his granola bar--"It's going to be a LONG day!" and then 20 minutes later, I saw he was sitting in the stroller and remained in the stroller while his brother played for another 45 minutes. Two nannies talking to each other while the 2-year-old kids sat right next to them--"His diapers are just disgusting and I can't deal with changing him anymore" and the little boy knew they were talking about him. It's totally clear they are nannies because no 21-year-old with 3-year-old and 1 year-old children could afford to live in these neighboords. Heck, I can't afford to live there!!

So parents are paying $15/hour for this sort of care (ignoring), and they still have to provide all supplies, food, toys/craft materials, pay for field trips/activities, AND probably deal with some of the mess in their home at the end of the day. AND deal with taxes and withholding if they pay their nannies legally. The nannies get to care for 1-2 kids (that doesn't even feel like work to me at this point!), go on field trips (I'd love to get out of the house more), and hang out with their friends/go online while they make pretty good money.

Before I opened the daycare, I considered hiring a nanny part-time to help me with my son. I would NEVER go that route now.

By the way, if you're a nanny who is offended by this, please don't be. You are not the kind of nanny I'm talking about. I'm pretty sure the nannies I saw at the park would never be looking for advice on a daycare forum. I doubt they are that committed!
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EntropyControlSpecialist 12:12 PM 08-13-2014
I see this a lot where I am, too. I am in a middle class neighborhood, though.

I was once a nanny. I didn't have an easy, cake walk like the nannies that I see out lately seem to. But, it certainly was A LOT easier than a big group!

If I could provide for my kids with a nanny job today I would do it in a heartbeat.
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SignMeUp 12:18 PM 08-13-2014
I see another version happen with SAHMs where we live. They look at my "evildaycarechildren" as if they are the devil himself. But theirs are whining and seeking attention inappropriately, while mine happily run to the play structures, run back to show me or the toddlers something, help each other, encourage each other. They are friendly and outgoing with the other kids, and sometimes the other kids will want to play, but more often the other kids don't seem to have the social skills that I take for granted in my children.

Oh, and most families around here also have a "nanny". It's what we used to call a babysitter although generally it's an older woman or a college age young woman (who does not necessarily have any real interest in, or skills around children).
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DaveA 12:30 PM 08-13-2014
Originally Posted by SignMeUp:
I see another version happen with SAHMs where we live. They look at my "evildaycarechildren" as if they are the devil himself.
I changed my group's library day because of a group of SAHMs that were just unbearable when we got there. Understand completely.
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preschoolteacher 12:35 PM 08-13-2014
On the other hand, the BEST nannies I see out are middle-aged Latino women who are hired in part because they can teach the kids to speak Spanish. These women are great, great, great with kids.

I also saw a nanny this summer stretched out and tanning (while on her phone) on a concrete bench while the infant (no more than 3-4 months) slept in a black carseat (in a stroller) with the black carseat canopy pulled up and the black stroller canopy pulled up, too. On the concrete. In the sun. It was easily 90 degrees. I worried so much about that baby napping in a carseat in that heat that I almost said something, but then her phone rang and she walked away.
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nannyde 12:58 PM 08-13-2014
The Nanny business is just like the staff assistant business and every other business now a days.

The cell phone is becoming a HUGE problem in the workforce. Any employee who has unsupervised time is going to be on the phone.

I'm surprised the wealthy just don't require the kids to be camera rigged so they can watch what they are dong at all times. It's cheap now.
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AmyKidsCo 01:06 PM 08-13-2014
I "nannied" 2 summers for the same family. I was an awful nanny, but in my defense it was when I was 12 & 13 so I didn't have much of a work ethic.
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SignMeUp 01:08 PM 08-13-2014
Originally Posted by nannyde:
The Nanny business is just like the staff assistant business and every other business now a days.
Except it's unregulated. Here, anyway.
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cheerfuldom 02:34 PM 08-13-2014
I guess I didnt find all of what you posted to be horrendous. I mean, people dont need to be on top of the kids running a three ring circus of entertainment all the time. As a parent, I wouldnt have an issue with my nanny making a call or visiting with others at the park.

I have also had an issue with assistants at my daycare being on the phone however, I wouldnt be so quick to judge one glimpse of a nanny on a call or chilling out while the kids play. Now the nanny letting the baby sleep in a hot car seat, definitely not! So there is definitely a difference between being on your phone ALL day and just checking in on things while the kids are clearly safe and happy.

I still think the parents are getting their moneys worth in a lot of cases because you have a provider coming to your house, having just your kids in care (minimal exposure to illness, biters and whatnot), the nanny handling activities, driving, meals, and cleanup. Some even do dinner prep, laundry and other things too.
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SignMeUp 03:31 PM 08-13-2014
Originally Posted by cheerfuldom:
Some even do dinner prep, laundry and other things too.
Ha. The summer I was 13, I took care of a 9 year old. He came to my door when he was about 40, and we both broke out laughing, because we were basically the same age
The summer I was 14, I took care of a 9 month old. The mom made a list of my responsibilities for each day: scrub floors, clean cupboards and fridge, laundry, ironing, etc. And I made them dinner to be ready when they got home each evening. For $20 a week. Double what I earned the previous year
And the summer I was 15, I took care of four, from age 4 to 9. Three boys and a girl. They ate a lot of spaghettios (that's what mom provided) and sometimes grilled cheese. Oh, I got paid $26 a week for that. Big money Maybe I should advertise on CraigsList.
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KidGrind 03:47 PM 08-13-2014
No justifying or excusing their not-so nanny behavior.

A family member was a nanny for an A-Lister’s kids. She made six figures with over-time. Anyhow she truly rarely got days off. And often her time off, she was getting calls.

She quit after not getting paid for over 6 weeks.

And I would like to share with all the nanny cams and recorders maybe the park is their break and freedom.
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