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Matthew0725 06:19 PM 08-23-2015
My question is not daycare related, so I apologize for that, but I am truly seeking some good honest advice because my wife and I are disagreeing about something.

The week after next, our four-year-old starts VPK. We have had a nanny for her for over two years, and we are going to be changing the way we pay her, but my wife and I are disagreeing about how we should pay her. I'll start by giving some background.

We have had this nanny for a little over two years. She has about seven years of experience, a college degree, and is also the mother of a four-year-old herself. So our daughter fortunately has a 4-5 days per week BFF. For the past two years, she has watched our daughter for an average of about 30 hours per week, and we have been paying her a weekly salary of $250 per week. (Some weeks she works a little more, a lot of weeks she works less, and some weeks she even has half or most of the week off, but we still pay her the weekly salary regardless.) This is under the table cash by the way, so we are not taking taxes out on our end. She spends about half of the day at our house, and the second half of the day at her house. She does a lot with the children, taking them out for outings, like the beach, museums, library, the zoo, etc. She also does a lot of crafts with them at the house. She is not in any way a sit in front of the TV kind of sitter. My wife does has a lot of frustrations with her because she is not the cleanest when it comes to picking up after the kids, and the house can be a bit of a mess a lot of the time when we get home from work. So that does drive my wife bonkers quite often (she's a clean freak on steroids). But we can take comfort in knowing that our little girl is being very well taken care of, has a great time with her little friend, and that the nanny loves her to death. This is the situation as it is today.

The week after next, our little girl starts preschool. So here's how the situation will be: I will drop her off at preschool, our nanny will have to pick her up at 1 o'clock, and she'll watch her until 4-5. So she will be watching our little girl about 15-20 hours per week. She will also be watching two very young children (a niece and a nephew) in addition to our daughter and hers. So there will be four children total. So that's what she will be doing starting next week.
Now for the question. I want to make sure that we are being fair to our caregiver, but we are also looking forward to saving some money in childcare costs now that we're not going to need as much of her. When I look up the national pay rates on different websites, they seem to say about $12 an hour for one child for afterschool programs. Both my wife and I think that that seems high, especially considering that she will be watching three other children besides our daughter. My wife thinks that 8 dollars an hour is "more than enough." I don't think that we should be paying her $12+ per hour, but I think that eight dollars an hour might be low. We're having a bit of a argument over this. Her argument being that A) she's getting paid under the table, and B) she's watching three other children. I don't know what the right answer is, or if there even is a "right" answer, but I certainly could use some impartial and honest advice. So in summary, she'll be watching her about 20 hours per week, she will also be watching three other children, and she will likely be doing the majority of all the watching at her house, not ours.
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Blackcat31 06:26 PM 08-23-2015
Originally Posted by Matthew0725:
My question is not daycare related, so I apologize for that, but I am truly seeking some good honest advice because my wife and I are disagreeing about something.

The week after next, our four-year-old starts VPK. We have had a nanny for her for over two years, and we are going to be changing the way we pay her, but my wife and I are disagreeing about how we should pay her. I'll start by giving some background.

We have had this nanny for a little over two years. She has about seven years of experience, a college degree, and is also the mother of a four-year-old herself. So our daughter fortunately has a 4-5 days per week BFF. For the past two years, she has watched our daughter for an average of about 30 hours per week, and we have been paying her a weekly salary of $250 per week. (Some weeks she works a little more, a lot of weeks she works less, and some weeks she even has half or most of the week off, but we still pay her the weekly salary regardless.) This is under the table cash by the way, so we are not taking taxes out on our end. She spends about half of the day at our house, and the second half of the day at her house. She does a lot with the children, taking them out for outings, like the beach, museums, library, the zoo, etc. She also does a lot of crafts with them at the house. She is not in any way a sit in front of the TV kind of sitter. My wife does has a lot of frustrations with her because she is not the cleanest when it comes to picking up after the kids, and the house can be a bit of a mess a lot of the time when we get home from work. So that does drive my wife bonkers quite often (she's a clean freak on steroids). But we can take comfort in knowing that our little girl is being very well taken care of, has a great time with her little friend, and that the nanny loves her to death. This is the situation as it is today.

The week after next, our little girl starts preschool. So here's how the situation will be: I will drop her off at preschool, our nanny will have to pick her up at 1 o'clock, and she'll watch her until 4-5. So she will be watching our little girl about 15-20 hours per week. She will also be watching two very young children (a niece and a nephew) in addition to our daughter and hers. So there will be four children total. So that's what she will be doing starting next week.
Now for the question. I want to make sure that we are being fair to our caregiver, but we are also looking forward to saving some money in childcare costs now that we're not going to need as much of her. When I look up the national pay rates on different websites, they seem to say about $12 an hour for one child for afterschool programs. Both my wife and I think that that seems high, especially considering that she will be watching three other children besides our daughter. My wife thinks that 8 dollars an hour is "more than enough." I don't think that we should be paying her $12+ per hour, but I think that eight dollars an hour might be low. We're having a bit of a argument over this. Her argument being that A) she's getting paid under the table, and B) she's watching three other children. I don't know what the right answer is, or if there even is a "right" answer, but I certainly could use some impartial and honest advice. So in summary, she'll be watching her about 20 hours per week, she will also be watching three other children, and she will likely be doing the majority of all the watching at her house, not ours.
Are you in the U.S. or Canada?
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Snowmom 07:18 PM 08-23-2015
Originally Posted by Matthew0725:
My question is not daycare related, so I apologize for that, but I am truly seeking some good honest advice because my wife and I are disagreeing about something.

The week after next, our four-year-old starts VPK. We have had a nanny for her for over two years, and we are going to be changing the way we pay her, but my wife and I are disagreeing about how we should pay her. I'll start by giving some background.

We have had this nanny for a little over two years. She has about seven years of experience, a college degree, and is also the mother of a four-year-old herself. So our daughter fortunately has a 4-5 days per week BFF. For the past two years, she has watched our daughter for an average of about 30 hours per week, and we have been paying her a weekly salary of $250 per week. (Some weeks she works a little more, a lot of weeks she works less, and some weeks she even has half or most of the week off, but we still pay her the weekly salary regardless.) This is under the table cash by the way, so we are not taking taxes out on our end. She spends about half of the day at our house, and the second half of the day at her house. She does a lot with the children, taking them out for outings, like the beach, museums, library, the zoo, etc. She also does a lot of crafts with them at the house. She is not in any way a sit in front of the TV kind of sitter. My wife does has a lot of frustrations with her because she is not the cleanest when it comes to picking up after the kids, and the house can be a bit of a mess a lot of the time when we get home from work. So that does drive my wife bonkers quite often (she's a clean freak on steroids). But we can take comfort in knowing that our little girl is being very well taken care of, has a great time with her little friend, and that the nanny loves her to death. This is the situation as it is today.

The week after next, our little girl starts preschool. So here's how the situation will be: I will drop her off at preschool, our nanny will have to pick her up at 1 o'clock, and she'll watch her until 4-5. So she will be watching our little girl about 15-20 hours per week. She will also be watching two very young children (a niece and a nephew) in addition to our daughter and hers. So there will be four children total. So that's what she will be doing starting next week.
Now for the question. I want to make sure that we are being fair to our caregiver, but we are also looking forward to saving some money in childcare costs now that we're not going to need as much of her. When I look up the national pay rates on different websites, they seem to say about $12 an hour for one child for afterschool programs. Both my wife and I think that that seems high, especially considering that she will be watching three other children besides our daughter. My wife thinks that 8 dollars an hour is "more than enough." I don't think that we should be paying her $12+ per hour, but I think that eight dollars an hour might be low. We're having a bit of a argument over this. Her argument being that A) she's getting paid under the table, and B) she's watching three other children. I don't know what the right answer is, or if there even is a "right" answer, but I certainly could use some impartial and honest advice. So in summary, she'll be watching her about 20 hours per week, she will also be watching three other children, and she will likely be doing the majority of all the watching at her house, not ours.
Right now, your nanny is making 8.33/hr with no cleaning duties.
Do you reimburse her gas/expenses?

To me, that's an awfully low wage. But, I also live in a state where minimum wage for a small employer is $7.25/hr. Nannies in my area, on average, make between $10-$15/hr, more for professional individuals and premium services (like cleaning/cooking).

I would ask the nanny what wage she thinks is fair and go from there.
Or, if technically what you are doing is a nanny-share with your family members (cousins), come to an agreement together what her wage would be.

Personally, I would offer to reimburse gas expenses along with her wage since you are requiring her to pick up your daughter from school.

As far as knowingly paying "under the table" goes.... that's really not a benefit to you or her to avoid the IRS, so.... ?
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mommyneedsadayoff 08:26 PM 08-23-2015
Originally Posted by Matthew0725:
My question is not daycare related, so I apologize for that, but I am truly seeking some good honest advice because my wife and I are disagreeing about something.

The week after next, our four-year-old starts VPK. We have had a nanny for her for over two years, and we are going to be changing the way we pay her, but my wife and I are disagreeing about how we should pay her. I'll start by giving some background.

We have had this nanny for a little over two years. She has about seven years of experience, a college degree, and is also the mother of a four-year-old herself. So our daughter fortunately has a 4-5 days per week BFF. For the past two years, she has watched our daughter for an average of about 30 hours per week, and we have been paying her a weekly salary of $250 per week. (Some weeks she works a little more, a lot of weeks she works less, and some weeks she even has half or most of the week off, but we still pay her the weekly salary regardless.) This is under the table cash by the way, so we are not taking taxes out on our end. She spends about half of the day at our house, and the second half of the day at her house. She does a lot with the children, taking them out for outings, like the beach, museums, library, the zoo, etc. She also does a lot of crafts with them at the house. She is not in any way a sit in front of the TV kind of sitter. My wife does has a lot of frustrations with her because she is not the cleanest when it comes to picking up after the kids, and the house can be a bit of a mess a lot of the time when we get home from work. So that does drive my wife bonkers quite often (she's a clean freak on steroids). But we can take comfort in knowing that our little girl is being very well taken care of, has a great time with her little friend, and that the nanny loves her to death. This is the situation as it is today.

The week after next, our little girl starts preschool. So here's how the situation will be: I will drop her off at preschool, our nanny will have to pick her up at 1 o'clock, and she'll watch her until 4-5. So she will be watching our little girl about 15-20 hours per week. She will also be watching two very young children (a niece and a nephew) in addition to our daughter and hers. So there will be four children total. So that's what she will be doing starting next week.
Now for the question. I want to make sure that we are being fair to our caregiver, but we are also looking forward to saving some money in childcare costs now that we're not going to need as much of her. When I look up the national pay rates on different websites, they seem to say about $12 an hour for one child for afterschool programs. Both my wife and I think that that seems high, especially considering that she will be watching three other children besides our daughter. My wife thinks that 8 dollars an hour is "more than enough." I don't think that we should be paying her $12+ per hour, but I think that eight dollars an hour might be low. We're having a bit of a argument over this. Her argument being that A) she's getting paid under the table, and B) she's watching three other children. I don't know what the right answer is, or if there even is a "right" answer, but I certainly could use some impartial and honest advice. So in summary, she'll be watching her about 20 hours per week, she will also be watching three other children, and she will likely be doing the majority of all the watching at her house, not ours.
I wouldn't pay her less per hour than what you currently do now. If you pay her about $8.33 an hour now, then you could pay her $9-$10 per hour and you will save money, but you will also be offering a fair wage. If you love your provider, then don't let the money part ruin the situation. Finding awesome childcare that you love is priceless.
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Unregistered 02:01 AM 08-24-2015
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
Are you in the U.S. or Canada?
We're in Florida
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Thriftylady 05:43 AM 08-24-2015
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
We're in Florida
Well if what I heard about the cost of living in Florida is true, then $12 an hour is a fair wage. We considered moving there a few years ago until we looked into the cost of living the job hubby was being offered was not anywhere near being worth it. If you love her and want to keep her, pay her like you want to keep her, nothing is keeping her from finding another family now who would have her more hours and better pay. I guess what I am saying is that you are getting great service that you are happy with from what I hear you saying. Give her a reason to stay.
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KidGrind 06:18 AM 08-24-2015
$10 per hour, stick to your schedule. If you need extra time then you should be willing to up it to $12 per hour.
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littletots 07:56 AM 08-24-2015
I agree with others. Same hr rate plus a little more for gas. She'll have to pickup your daughter juggling other children. Unload, load, car seats, bad weather.
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childcaremom 08:02 AM 08-24-2015
I would make sure that it is legal as she is now caring for a group in her home.

ETA: I have no idea what the laws are. I just know from reading here that they are really varied and differ quite a bit.

I would think that even though she is watching your daughter for less hours, she is conveniencing you by agreeing to transport your daughter. I also think that if you are happy with her care, and your daughter enjoys the company of the other children, it is fair to pay the same, if not slightly higher for the care.
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LysesKids 08:35 AM 08-24-2015
Originally Posted by childcaremom:
I would make sure that it is legal as she is now caring for a group in her home.

ETA: I have no idea what the laws are. I just know from reading here that they are really varied and differ quite a bit.

I would think that even though she is watching your daughter for less hours, she is conveniencing you by agreeing to transport your daughter. I also think that if you are happy with her care, and your daughter enjoys the company of the other children, it is fair to pay the same, if not slightly higher for the care.
I agree the laws in FL very from county to county & some would fine her for doing care in her home as unlicensed... plus OP is paying under the table; the IRS can fine them as well if Nanny decides to ever complain taxes weren't paid
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Shell 09:08 AM 08-24-2015
Hmm, I think I would keep paying her what you're paying now, but I think circumstances have changed, and it's worth a conversation with her to see what her thoughts are.

She will essentially be running an in home daycare now, so she's not really in a nanny position anymore, with it being at her house and with other kids besides your own.

I certainly couldn't charge $8-$12 per child at my in home, so I think I can understand where your wife is coming from.
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Unregistered 09:13 AM 08-24-2015
Thanks for all the advice everyone. This IS helpful. Gives my wife and I something to sit down and read through this evening. As far as the legality of it, I'm certainly no specialist with childcare laws, but I don't that it makes any difference that 3 of them are her family. Ours is the only one that isn't family. (1 is her daughter, 2 are nephews, actually, scratch that, 2 are grandsons... I always forget they're grandsons, not nephews - her hubby had a daughter very early, so she's a very young grandmother, doesn't even feel right saying grandmother cause she's only in her mid 30's) That might not make any difference at all, but thought I'd clarify that.
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KidGrind 09:17 AM 08-24-2015
The nanny in question is watching her family members own daughter, niece and nephew.

Also the original poster said, “most of the time” in the nanny’s home.

I do and can charge $10+ in my home now. I think $10 per hour of care is fair to all parties involved. As a parent it's worth having peace in knowing your child is with someone you know and trust.
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LysesKids 09:36 AM 08-24-2015
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
Thanks for all the advice everyone. This IS helpful. Gives my wife and I something to sit down and read through this evening. As far as the legality of it, I'm certainly no specialist with childcare laws, but I don't that it makes any difference that 3 of them are her family. Ours is the only one that isn't family. (1 is her daughter, 2 are nephews, actually, scratch that, 2 are grandsons... I always forget they're grandsons, not nephews - her hubby had a daughter very early, so she's a very young grandmother, doesn't even feel right saying grandmother cause she's only in her mid 30's) That might not make any difference at all, but thought I'd clarify that.
The fact it is family could make quite a bit of difference because legally she could care for them with or without pay in many states and if they are old enough, they won't count in the ratio... if yours is the only one that isn't family, I could see where she would still want her Nanny wages; might be the only $$ she is actually getting paid, plus many counties don't require a license until you have 5 unrelated children in care ( some you have to be licensed to take just one child)
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Thriftylady 09:45 AM 08-24-2015
Originally Posted by LysesKids:
The fact it is family could make quite a bit of difference because legally she could care for them without pay in many states (or say so anyway)... if yours is the only one that isn't family, I could see where she would still want her Nanny wages; might be the only $$ she is actually getting paid.
I agree with this. My grandson gets free care (but that is a whole different thread right now), when they need it. It is how I financially "help" the kids.
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Crazy8 11:32 AM 08-24-2015
rates really vary from state to state and even county to county within a state. I would start with looking into what other daycare programs would charge for a similar service. And agree with others, basically she is switching from being your nanny to being more of an at home daycare provider. That may mean a change of rate (often equaling more per hour than that of a full time rate) but I would keep it to the "norm" for your area.
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