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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Maybe DCM is Trying to Control What We Do Here
Crazy Baby 02:41 PM 06-29-2016
I feel like one of my daycare moms is trying to dictate what I am doing with the kids. Every time she drops off she has to make some comment like "so you all are going outside now, right?" or will tell her child something like "you guys can go in the back and play slip n slide soon."
It has just been rubbing me the wrong way. I feel like she tries to control what I am doing with the kids in a passive way.
Do any of you do water time everyday? I told her that we could do water time on Tuesdays. She says "or everyday?"
Maybe I am being ridiculous, but this annoys me.
It has just been rubbing me the wrong way. I feel like she tries to control what I am doing with the kids in a passive way.
Do any of you do water time everyday? I told her that we could do water time on Tuesdays. She says "or everyday?"
Maybe I am being ridiculous, but this annoys me.
NillaWafers 02:58 PM 06-29-2016
Sure mom, we can do waterplay everyday, just make sure to be here from 3-5 to change ALL THE KIDS in and out of their swimsuits.
Because that's not difficult at all, lol.
Yes, that would irk me.
Because that's not difficult at all, lol.
Yes, that would irk me.
Josiegirl 03:29 PM 06-29-2016
I'd try to let it slide off my back but inside it would irk me too I'm sure. I would have no idea what her motive is for making comments like this. I'd have a hard time not saying something like 'yes we can do slip n slide and then when Mommy picks you up she can take you to McDonalds'.
We don't do water play every day, but when we feel like it. In fact, most of the time we don't know til we get outside so I take the 3 younger dcks in the basement with me to turn the hose on, send an older kid back in the house for the stack of towels, we're good to go. I told the dcps not to worry about sending bathing suits specifically, just make sure they have extra clothes to change into, because water play here is usually a very spur of the moment decision.
We don't do water play every day, but when we feel like it. In fact, most of the time we don't know til we get outside so I take the 3 younger dcks in the basement with me to turn the hose on, send an older kid back in the house for the stack of towels, we're good to go. I told the dcps not to worry about sending bathing suits specifically, just make sure they have extra clothes to change into, because water play here is usually a very spur of the moment decision.
MarinaVanessa 04:55 PM 06-29-2016
Although a similar response like Josie's popped into my head **chuckling** I've learned to just handle these situations head on.
DCM: Mrs Marina is going to take you guys out back for water play ..
Me: Not today. We've got a busy day planned already. No time for water play today.
DCK: Awww ... but my mommy said we could play with water!
DCM: We'll that's just silly. I don't know why your mommy would say that. I never told her that! Let's come over here so we can get ready to ...
DCM: Mrs Marina is going to take you guys out back for water play ..
Me: Not today. We've got a busy day planned already. No time for water play today.
DCK: Awww ... but my mommy said we could play with water!
DCM: We'll that's just silly. I don't know why your mommy would say that. I never told her that! Let's come over here so we can get ready to ...
Unregistered 05:10 PM 06-29-2016
THAT. WOULD. BE. IRRITATING! Really, really irritating!
We do water play every day but NOT the get in your swimsuits kind. I have the water table up every day, bubbles in a pail and big wands, a of container of water and big, adult paint brushes to paint the driveway, etc.
I don't put kids in swimsuits but they can come in them. Or if they are old enough to change themselves go for it! I hate get all those kids ready. Their clothes can get wet. It's not like they swim in them!
It's more like they get damp.
I get out a squiggly, rope sprinkler once in awhile. Little kids really don't love sprinklers all that much!
We also wash bikes and our play houses about once a week.
We do water play every day but NOT the get in your swimsuits kind. I have the water table up every day, bubbles in a pail and big wands, a of container of water and big, adult paint brushes to paint the driveway, etc.
I don't put kids in swimsuits but they can come in them. Or if they are old enough to change themselves go for it! I hate get all those kids ready. Their clothes can get wet. It's not like they swim in them!
It's more like they get damp.
I get out a squiggly, rope sprinkler once in awhile. Little kids really don't love sprinklers all that much!
We also wash bikes and our play houses about once a week.
Unregistered 05:12 PM 06-29-2016
Oh, we do all this in the morning. Sprinkler day is swimsuits!
nannyde 05:17 PM 06-29-2016
She's definitely trying to tell you what to do.
Best answer is "We'll see."
When she picks up and asks if you did xyz tell her not today but there's plenty of time tonight for the kids to do xyz at home.
I would NEVER do a thing she brings up. Not once. If she complains just tell her that all the parents have ideas and wants for what their kids do each and every day. Tell her you have to decide what the kids will do and every day most parents are upset because it wasn't what they picked. It's just part of doing daycare. You understand that every parent wants to decide what their kids do but you don't charge for the staff it would take to do each and every activity with each kid the parents want. You charge group care rates and you decide what the activities will be.
If she wants special activities she decides daily you can hire a staff assistant for her kids. That would be $15 an hour per day in addition to their regular tuition. Just think about it and let you know what she would like hired out so her kids can do the activities she wants.
I stopped doing all water activities and most painting. They were just too expensive in staff time. I did time studies with a staff assistant and it was really expensive to do water play. Painting came in.second place.
One of my fave threads ever is about water play. I'll see if I can find it.
Best answer is "We'll see."
When she picks up and asks if you did xyz tell her not today but there's plenty of time tonight for the kids to do xyz at home.
I would NEVER do a thing she brings up. Not once. If she complains just tell her that all the parents have ideas and wants for what their kids do each and every day. Tell her you have to decide what the kids will do and every day most parents are upset because it wasn't what they picked. It's just part of doing daycare. You understand that every parent wants to decide what their kids do but you don't charge for the staff it would take to do each and every activity with each kid the parents want. You charge group care rates and you decide what the activities will be.
If she wants special activities she decides daily you can hire a staff assistant for her kids. That would be $15 an hour per day in addition to their regular tuition. Just think about it and let you know what she would like hired out so her kids can do the activities she wants.
I stopped doing all water activities and most painting. They were just too expensive in staff time. I did time studies with a staff assistant and it was really expensive to do water play. Painting came in.second place.
One of my fave threads ever is about water play. I'll see if I can find it.
nannyde 05:31 PM 06-29-2016
Leigh 08:09 PM 06-29-2016
Originally Posted by nannyde:
https://www.daycare.com/forum/showthread.php?t=32399
OMG! I'm only a little way through that thread, and I'm DYING! "parents are too TIRED to play with their kids after work-that's your job" LMFAO! Oh! Oh! Oh! https://www.daycare.com/forum/showthread.php?t=32399
Unregistered 03:37 AM 06-30-2016
Originally Posted by Leigh:
OMG! I'm only a little way through that thread, and I'm DYING! "parents are too TIRED to play with their kids after work-that's your job" LMFAO! Oh! Oh! Oh!
That thread was kind of silly...tee heeOMG! I'm only a little way through that thread, and I'm DYING! "parents are too TIRED to play with their kids after work-that's your job" LMFAO! Oh! Oh! Oh!
284878 09:10 AM 06-30-2016
Originally Posted by nannyde:
https://www.daycare.com/forum/showthread.php?t=32399
Wow! I am shocked that just because you said clipped coupons instead of cutting paper or hike instead of walk they jumped on that. Wow https://www.daycare.com/forum/showthread.php?t=32399
Here is my opinion. Water play is high risk and a saftey issue! 1. it increase your change to slip and get hurt, 2. Sunscreen does not last as long in water (so you have to reapply more often), 3. Reflection of the sun on the water increase the chance of getting burnt.
And here the rules state no standing water when not in use, so any wading pool must be filled when you go out, which means kids must wait and water will be cold, then dumped before going inside, which means just as the water gets warm enough you must dump and start over the next time you go out.
So I vote, I don't want to, too much hassle.
Blackcat31 09:34 AM 06-30-2016
Originally Posted by nannyde:
https://www.daycare.com/forum/showthread.php?t=32399
https://www.daycare.com/forum/showthread.php?t=32399
Oh-Oh.... NannyDe AND the word sprinkler used in the same sentence....
Crazy8 09:45 AM 06-30-2016
I have told parents to please not tell a child what we will do (such as go to the park, etc.) as our days are based on ALL the children in care and I will not be the bad guy if we don't get to do what mommy promised them we would. And if I find a child saying "my mommy said we will paint today" I turn it right back and say I am sure mommy will have that ready for you as soon as you get home - and then I'm sure to mention it at pick up!! 
Snowmom 12:22 PM 06-30-2016
Originally Posted by Crazy Baby:
I feel like one of my daycare moms is trying to dictate what I am doing with the kids. Every time she drops off she has to make some comment like "so you all are going outside now, right?" or will tell her child something like "you guys can go in the back and play slip n slide soon."
It has just been rubbing me the wrong way. I feel like she tries to control what I am doing with the kids in a passive way.
Do any of you do water time everyday? I told her that we could do water time on Tuesdays. She says "or everyday?"
Maybe I am being ridiculous, but this annoys me.
Jeez. Some people's children. I feel like one of my daycare moms is trying to dictate what I am doing with the kids. Every time she drops off she has to make some comment like "so you all are going outside now, right?" or will tell her child something like "you guys can go in the back and play slip n slide soon."
It has just been rubbing me the wrong way. I feel like she tries to control what I am doing with the kids in a passive way.
Do any of you do water time everyday? I told her that we could do water time on Tuesdays. She says "or everyday?"
Maybe I am being ridiculous, but this annoys me.
I would call her out on her passive aggressive attempts to control your day.
I'd simply ask her "why would you think that?". If she pushed it further (because usually it just ends in an apology when a passive aggressive attempt is actually answered), then I'd tell her: "the services I provide are my choice. You are welcome to ask what our schedule for the day is, but it is not negotiable. Thank you for understanding".
permanentvacation 02:40 PM 06-30-2016
I used to do water play every day. My kids would come in the morning dressed in their bathing suits and bring a clean, dry towel with them. I'd already be outside with my personal children in the sprinkler as the daycare kids arrived. However, that was years ago when I was younger and when all of my kids were school agers which means that they did not need any help at all with getting undressed out of their bathing suits and dressed in their clothes. They were also quite capable of turning their bathing suits right side out and hanging their bathing suits and towels on my fence to dry. And my personal kids were able to set the sprinkler up. So technically, I didn't have any extra work on me. I just had to be outside monitoring them.
But, yes, I would be quite upset and have had a few parents who do exactly what you are saying your daycare parent is doing. Sometimes I'd address the parent and boldface tell them, "No, we are not doing that today." Other times I'd wait until the child asks when we're doing the activity the parent told him/her we were doing and I'd tell the child that we weren't doing that activity.
I think it's a way for the parents to make their child happier about going to daycare. Kind of like bribing them. Instead of just parenting them and commanding to them that they will attend daycare every day that the parents work, just learn to accept that fact, they try to make the child want to go to daycare because we're going to do so much to entertain them that they will feel like they're going to Disney World every day!
But, yes, I would be quite upset and have had a few parents who do exactly what you are saying your daycare parent is doing. Sometimes I'd address the parent and boldface tell them, "No, we are not doing that today." Other times I'd wait until the child asks when we're doing the activity the parent told him/her we were doing and I'd tell the child that we weren't doing that activity.
I think it's a way for the parents to make their child happier about going to daycare. Kind of like bribing them. Instead of just parenting them and commanding to them that they will attend daycare every day that the parents work, just learn to accept that fact, they try to make the child want to go to daycare because we're going to do so much to entertain them that they will feel like they're going to Disney World every day!