Default Style Register
Daycare.com Forum
Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Baby Ear Piercing
Maggie 05:29 AM 03-15-2014
I have a dcm who keeps mentioning that she wants to get dcgs ears pierced when she turns one. I know it's common but I have always considered it cruel and selfish to put a baby through unnecessary pain. Does anyone have a policy on this or experience with this? I don't want to have to worry about them getting caught on something or her pulling on them. It just seems to me it would become a problem.
Reply
Laurel 05:44 AM 03-15-2014
Originally Posted by Maggie:
I have a dcm who keeps mentioning that she wants to get dcgs ears pierced when she turns one. I know it's common but I have always considered it cruel and selfish to put a baby through unnecessary pain. Does anyone have a policy on this or experience with this? I don't want to have to worry about them getting caught on something or her pulling on them. It just seems to me it would become a problem.
It is not my thing either but I've had babies that have them pierced and it is no problem on my end. On a rare occasion an earring has come out but was easy to put back on.

I don't allow any jewelry or fancy barrettes because other babies take them out of the child's hair and put them in their mouth. But pierced ears have never been a problem.

Laurel
Reply
KidGrind 05:59 AM 03-15-2014
Originally Posted by Maggie:
I have a dcm who keeps mentioning that she wants to get dcgs ears pierced when she turns one. I know it's common but I have always considered it cruel and selfish to put a baby through unnecessary pain. Does anyone have a policy on this or experience with this? I don't want to have to worry about them getting caught on something or her pulling on them. It just seems to me it would become a problem.
Both my daughters were pierced when they were babies. As a child who was pierced at an older age, I remember the experience. I would’ve preferred to have gotten it done as a baby leading to no memory of it.

They were no hassle. It’s the DCPs responsibility to keep them clean with a solution morning and night. One of my DCG’s 3 has piercings and they’re no problem at all. If I were to have a policy on earrings it would be:

Earrings must be stud type and/or no longer than 1/6 of an inch.
Reply
Maggie 06:02 AM 03-15-2014
Thank you Laurel that's good to know because I don't think I will be able to talk her out of it. Unless.....someone has had a bad experience that I can share with mom to maybe change her mind and keep my sweet little girl from suffering through this.
Reply
Leanna 06:19 AM 03-15-2014
Some considerations...

It could be a cultural thing. In some cultures baby girls have their ears pierced right after birth.

For better or worse, it is her parent's choice. Would you try to talk a mom out of circumcising her baby boy? The same argument that it is unnecessary pain could be made.

In my own experience, I've had a few DCK's (boys and girls) who've had earrings as infants (younger than a year) and have never had a problem with them.
Reply
mountainside13 06:37 AM 03-15-2014
The only problem I have is how they pierce infants ears with the gun. This is a very interesting and informative article comparing a mall shop with a gun and a tattoo parlor.

http://time.com/1410/why-i-took-my-7...tattoo-parlor/
Reply
Blackcat31 07:01 AM 03-15-2014
I had my DD's ears pierced when she was a baby. I believe she was around 7 months old.

Her pediatrician did it during a well child check.

I was always told the ear cartilage is softer in infants and the older a child gets the more nerve connections are formed in that area so there is less pain for an infant verses a 5 yr old..... whether that is true or not, I have no idea.

She didn't cry.

I used earrings with screw on backs that could not come out accidentally and pose a choking hazard for her.

I've had several babies in care who've had their ears pierced. (No boys yet...although I do know a few) One of the littlest ones was 4 days old when the parents had her ears pierced. For them it was cultural.

For me, it was just my young, inexperienced ways... I was 21 and my DD had a boys name so it just seemed right at the time.

I was 5 when I had my own ears pierced and I totally remember it. It wasn't a pleasant experience.
Reply
cheerfuldom 07:27 AM 03-15-2014
I don't think you should try and talk mom out of this. That is over stepping your boundaries. The ear piercing does not affect you or your daycare so it is none of your business.

I think we providers need to be careful about boundaries. This is not your child. Ear piercing is up to the parent.
Reply
Maggie 08:08 AM 03-15-2014
You're right not my baby or my decision and I haven't shared my opinion on this with mom for that reason. My question was if any other providers have dealt with this because it seems like it could be a potential problem. And yes I was hoping to hear negative things about it that I could share with her without it seeming like I was judging her.
Reply
Blackcat31 08:14 AM 03-15-2014
Originally Posted by Maggie:
You're right not my baby or my decision and I haven't shared my opinion on this with mom for that reason. My question was if any other providers have dealt with this because it seems like it could be a potential problem. And yes I was hoping to hear negative things about it that I could share with her without it seeming like I was judging her.
The only thing I would say to mom is that you require earrings (if worn) that can NOT be removed or fall out. No dangling earrings or anything similar.

A lot of time, a newly pierced ear needs to be cleaned multiple times a day....I would let mom know you will NOT be providing any care in regards to that process.... it shouldn't be your responsibility at all.

I'd require screw on backs only as they can't just fall out...

They look like this:


Reply
CraftyMom 08:47 AM 03-15-2014
The only problem I've had is when 18 month old (who had them pierced at 3 months) started pulling them out at nap time, but they were small loops and she could stick her finger in there and pull on them. After 3 times of that I told mom she needed studs. Also said I wasn't responsible for lost earrings or damage to ears caused by pulling on them. She has worn studs ever since (last 4 months) and there has been no other issue
Reply
racemom 08:59 AM 03-15-2014
I was worried when one of my dcbaby got pierced for her first birthday. I thought either she or other babies would mess with them but no problems so far shes had them for 6 months now. I really am surprised because they cannot leave hair bows or even bands in their hair or each others so I thought everyone would be after the stud earrings but nobody even noticed.
Reply
Meeko 09:28 AM 03-15-2014
I have certain rules when it comes to ear piercing.

I will not be responsible for any cleaning/care.

The earrings must be the kind that cannot be pulled out.

If they become infected (it happened once), the child must stay home until they are taken care of. I don't want a crabby child with sore ears all day and lying on my floor with weeping, infected ears ....I know.......TMI!!!!!

I was 19 when I had mine done. My daughters were about 14. I wanted them to chose whether they wanted it done and they were responsible for the care while healing.
Reply
Starburst 10:18 AM 03-15-2014
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
I had my DD's ears pierced when she was a baby. I believe she was around 7 months old.

Her pediatrician did it during a well child check.

I was always told the ear cartilage is softer in infants and the older a child gets the more nerve connections are formed in that area so there is less pain for an infant verses a 5 yr old..... whether that is true or not, I have no idea.
I got my first ear piercing when I was 3 months old. When I was little I just assumed girl ears came like that, until I found out one of my friend didn't have pierced ears (sometimes she wore magnets and clips-ons, which are more of a safety hazard in a child care setting IMO). There isn't cartilage in the lobe where standard piercings are, it's just skin and soft connective tissue. The actual cartilage is on the top part of the ear (most places will not pierce there on a young child because it is more painful and has a higher risk of infection). Some people believe that the acupuncture points in the part of the ears that are usually pierced can supposedly increases spiritual energy http://www.spiritualresearchfoundati...-body-piercing. On another note, some believe that naval piercings can affect fertility (though I do know someone with a naval piercing who was told she would have issues having children and is now expecting her 3rd child, maybe it can reverse it if you already have issues?).

I have a high tolerance for pain when it comes to piercings and tattoos (I had no pain issues with my cartilage/nose/lip piercings in my teens, my tattoo tickled). At the daycare I used to work at there was a 9 year old that had her cartilage pierced. And most of the time with new ear piercings use starter studs which are sharper (to penetrate the lobe) and have a special closed backing so it can't easily come lose and so the sharp backing can't hurt the back of their ear. These type of studs are very common in "baby earrings".

http://www.overstockjeweler.com/baby...rings-3mm.html

I would just have a rule about it being done professionally at a pediatricians office (maybe a respectable piercing parlor that has a good reputation, if you have one in your town, and doesn't use piercing guns), note required! If they do it at home, I would tell them to wait at least 24 hours before she will be allowed back in the daycare (in case of infection/fever), definitely would NOT allow them back for at least 2 days if they get it done at a mall/Wal-Mart (they almost always use "reusable" piercing guns which are hard to sanitize and increase infection and transfer of blood born illnesses). And definitely no dangling earrings or hoops.
Reply
sahm1225 10:44 AM 03-15-2014
My dd ears are pierced and we went to the mall. Maybe it depends where youre located, but here they use a sterilized sealed piercing gun that goes into the medical waste lock container when done.

I would just recommend to the mom what the other pp have said (you won't clean them, no hoops, if infected cannot be at daycare, not responsible if lost, etc).

We pierced dd at 9 months. She didn't even cry. But she started playing with them and knew how to remove them around 15 months. We tried everything to keep them on (putting them backwards, child safety twist & lock ones, etc) with no luck and just removed them. She's 4 now and we just repierced them. She didn't cry, but she definitely knew what was going on and pretty sure she will remember it. I wish she had kept them on as a baby, it was so much easier to clean!
Reply
Candy 12:57 PM 03-15-2014
wow I was just about to make a thread on this but i'm on the other end. You can't really tell a parent anything about piercing their child ears unless it's in your contract. I know that a lot of people are against babies getting their ears pierced I am not one of them if I hadn't got them when I was a baby I would have never gotten them. I have had women try to explain to me why they think its cruel because most babies don't cry I don't get it but whatever everyone has an opinion. I haven't ever seen a child earring get snagged on anything not sure how that would even happen but I don't think its something you would have to worry about. Neither would cleaning that's something the mother should do at home.
Reply
Candy 01:00 PM 03-15-2014
Btw I would share any bad stories with mom or try to talk her out of it I just wouldn't do it.
Reply
Play Care 05:11 AM 03-16-2014
Originally Posted by Meeko:
I have certain rules when it comes to ear piercing.

I will not be responsible for any cleaning/care.

The earrings must be the kind that cannot be pulled out.

If they become infected (it happened once), the child must stay home until they are taken care of. I don't want a crabby child with sore ears all day and lying on my floor with weeping, infected ears ....I know.......TMI!!!!!

I was 19 when I had mine done. My daughters were about 14. I wanted them to chose whether they wanted it done and they were responsible for the care while healing.


Good ideas! I haven't had any one with pierced ears yet, but I do think the care/cleaning is completely the parents responsibility. I don't even know if I would be comfortable putting and earring back in should it fall out (I know my own pierced ears can be tender when putting earrings in) - so I might add that I will call the parent to come do it. I would never talk anyone out of it or give horror stories - but I also won't take on (possible) extra work because of a parents decision either.
Reply
Scribbles 08:09 AM 03-16-2014
I haven't had any baby girls with pierced ears yet but I have a boy who has both ears pierced. He started with me at age 2 and is now 6. The summer before he started school, he begged his mom to let him get his ears pierced so she let him. He usually wears big diamond (fake one I am sure) studs.

Personally I think it looks funny but I think that is due to my own personal beliefs and upbringing but the little boy tells me most of his friends at school have one of both ears pierced too.
Reply
Crazy8 01:54 PM 03-16-2014
one of the biggest pros to getting them done young is they don't really mess with them. The 2 year old that gets her ears pierced is going to touch them, the 6 month old doesn't. I agree it is overstepping your bounds to even voice your disagreement. I would maybe suggest screw or locking backs for infants but that's it.
I pierced my daughter's ears myself when she was 6 months old. She cried for 30 seconds and then was fine. I used to pierce ears when I worked in a jewelry store and I had some babies where mom would give them a bottle during the piercing and then never even flinched. I saw more infections and problems with older kids who got them pierced than with babies.
Reply
Unregistered 02:08 PM 03-16-2014
Has never been an issue here. Pretty common to just put a bit of Emla cream on shortly before getting them pierced and they do not feel a thing. I just require small studs for daycare. I've never had one come out, but if I did, it would just go in a baggie for home time.
Reply
Second Home 02:42 PM 03-16-2014
Originally Posted by Maggie:
Unless.....someone has had a bad experience that I can share with mom to maybe change her mind and keep my sweet little girl from suffering through this.
I had my daughters ears pierced when she was about a year old at the same time as her immunizations .

She was fine with them until about 2 1/2 yrs old when she decided to take one out and eat it .
My Mom was watching her at the time and when she asked her what happened to the earring she said she put it in her mouth . My Mom calls me and I leave work to take her for x-rays ( the Dr said to ) , and there it was a little white spot on the x-ray .
I had to watch her poop until it came out . That meant taking it out of the potty , putting it in a zip lock bag and smushing each day it until I found the earring .

If I had not found the earring within 10 days the Dr mentioned going in to get it
Reply
Msdunny 04:41 PM 03-16-2014
Originally Posted by Play Care:


Good ideas! I haven't had any one with pierced ears yet, but I do think the care/cleaning is completely the parents responsibility. I don't even know if I would be comfortable putting and earring back in should it fall out (I know my own pierced ears can be tender when putting earrings in) - so I might add that I will call the parent to come do it. I would never talk anyone out of it or give horror stories - but I also won't take on (possible) extra work because of a parents decision either.
My 3 yo dcg got her ears pierced a few weeks ago, and one of them was pulled out when she laid down on the couch and it got caught in the couch material. It was bleeding quit a lot. So I cleaned her ear and sent the earring home in a Baggie. The parents couldn't get the earring in - the dcg told me she screamed too much! So she now has one ear pierced. They are letting the other close back up and then will get that one ear pierced again in a few months.
Reply
Snapdragon 07:02 PM 03-16-2014
I think each to their own. I had my ears pierced at 14 and was responsible for the cleaning, disinfecting etc. It wasn't plain sailing, as one ear kept getting infected, but I never regretted it. However, I felt strongly that both my daughters should have the choice as to whether to pierce their ears -- one decided to go ahead at 12; the other isn't interested. I wouldn't judge anyone for having their child's ears pierced as a baby though. It just wasn't something I chose to do.
Reply
Sunchimes 05:56 AM 03-17-2014
One of my DC moms had chosen not to pierce her daughter's ears until the child wanted it. She was under a year old when on a weekend visit with dad, he had them pierced. A normally civil relationship got really ugly! However, I never had any problems with it in daycare.
Reply
taylorw1210 07:04 AM 03-17-2014
As long as mom cleans them like she's supposed to after it's done, and has the right earrings in, I doubt it'll be a problem for you.
Reply
mia 07:10 AM 03-17-2014
I got my daughters done when she was 4 months .... she never had any problems nor did the daycare children...
Reply
grateday 04:14 PM 03-17-2014
Originally Posted by msdunny:
my 3 yo dcg got her ears pierced a few weeks ago, and one of them was pulled out when she laid down on the couch and it got caught in the couch material. It was bleeding quit a lot. So i cleaned her ear and sent the earring home in a baggie. The parents couldn't get the earring in - the dcg told me she screamed too much! So she now has one ear pierced. They are letting the other close back up and then will get that one ear pierced again in a few months.
i had a kid with a pretty bad laceration from ripping new ones out. I don't like it but it's not up to me and i m not buying the 30 or some rip out until they adjust to having foreign material on there skin.
Reply
choirlady76 08:05 PM 03-17-2014
I'm not a fan of piercings. However, there are several one- year-olds and under at my center who have their ears pierced. I've never had any problems and most have just plain gem studs or fake pears etc. I don't think you'll have any issues if this parent does decide to get their babies ears pierced.
Reply
My3cents 11:53 AM 03-18-2014
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
The only thing I would say to mom is that you require earrings (if worn) that can NOT be removed or fall out. No dangling earrings or anything similar.

A lot of time, a newly pierced ear needs to be cleaned multiple times a day....I would let mom know you will NOT be providing any care in regards to that process.... it shouldn't be your responsibility at all.

I'd require screw on backs only as they can't just fall out...

They look like this:

this is good info

I agree its a parents choice-
I personally feel it should be a child's choice( I don't know if choice is the right word or not, but right of passage so to speak, or a mother/daughter event, yet choice is what I mean- after all it is a hole in a persons head) at around the age 10-12 and one that is talked about extensively with the child- Weird side of it for me is that I feel a boy should be circumcised before leaving the hospital. just me and my quirky ways-
Reply
TwinKristi 01:19 PM 03-18-2014
Originally Posted by My3cents:
this is good info

I agree its a parents choice-
I personally feel it should be a child's choice( I don't know if choice is the right word or not, but right of passage so to speak, or a mother/daughter event, yet choice is what I mean- after all it is a hole in a persons head) at around the age 10-12 and one that is talked about extensively with the child- Weird side of it for me is that I feel a boy should be circumcised before leaving the hospital. just me and my quirky ways-
See I wasn't going to bring this up because it's sooooo individual and personal but most people view these as similar choices. Children should have the choice with their own body. The difference is circumcision is not reversible and ear piercings are! Your holes close up and are hardly visible if you don't wear earrings.
Reply
Blackcat31 01:31 PM 03-18-2014
Originally Posted by TwinKristi:
See I wasn't going to bring this up because it's sooooo individual and personal but most people view these as similar choices. Children should have the choice with their own body. The difference is circumcision is not reversible and ear piercings are! Your holes close up and are hardly visible if you don't wear earrings.
I couldn't imagine a male CHOOSING to be circumcised... LOL!

A couple years back though I had a DCM that did not have her DS circumcised when he was born because the father's family didn't believe/practice it.

A couple years later, DCM and DCD broke up.....

Yep, she went in and had her DS circumcised. He was 4.

It was NOT a pretty story for anyone.
Reply
Kabob 01:45 PM 03-18-2014
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
I couldn't imagine a male CHOOSING to be circumcised... LOL!

A couple years back though I had a DCM that did not have her DS circumcised when he was born because the father's family didn't believe/practice it.

A couple years later, DCM and DCD broke up.....

Yep, she went in and had her DS circumcised. He was 4.

It was NOT a pretty story for anyone.
Makes me think of that Sex and the City episode where Charlotte convinced her boyfriend to get a circumcision...

On a side note, as someone who had a difficult childhood (long story), I just don't like the idea of altering my child's body unless absolutely necessary. Do I judge those that do? No. They don't have my phobias or background. We all have social norms that influence us too...and those norms vary even between two states or even cities within those states. I just try my hardest to accept everyone's differences in ideas of beauty as best as I can. Doesn't mean I'm gonna go out and get a nose piercing, dye my hair pink, or wear fish net stockings...I just wouldn't feel comfortable.

P.S. - My ears were pierced against my will (I was older) and I quit wearing them as soon as I "lost" them...much to my mother's dismay. It really depends on the child....and I was a wild child.
Reply
Mom of 4 03:47 PM 03-18-2014
DD # 1 - 18 months when she got her ears pierced. Cried for awhile, then would check herself out and say "pretty" all the time, and it seemed she did want to touch them a little bit.

Needless to say,
DD #2 I did hers earlier (before age 1) so I wouldn't hear the crying or be worried about her messing with her ears.

DD#2 was the easier one and not once did she touch her ears. In fact, she still has her piercers in and she is 6 yo. We clean them and take them out here and there, but she loves them and so we just let her keep wearing them.
Reply
missy 07:25 PM 03-18-2014
I personally have always found the baby ear piercing thing strange. I don't find it cruel or anything, but just weird that moms want to pierce ears that young. The friends i have that partake, they say it is so people will know their babies are girls. Well even when I dressed my baby girl in all pink, with flowers and girlie clothing out the ying yang, people still asked if she was a girl or boy!!! So who cares what people think?! They grow up eventually!
Reply
Cradle2crayons 07:33 PM 03-18-2014
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
I couldn't imagine a male CHOOSING to be circumcised... LOL!

A couple years back though I had a DCM that did not have her DS circumcised when he was born because the father's family didn't believe/practice it.

A couple years later, DCM and DCD broke up.....

Yep, she went in and had her DS circumcised. He was 4.

It was NOT a pretty story for anyone.
When it was in nursing school we did clinicals in the local veterans hospital and there was a 94 year old guy there to get circumcised... There was a medical reason I can't remember what now... It was... Um... Interesting as a fresh young nursing student haha
Reply
hwichlaz 03:02 PM 03-19-2014
Originally Posted by Leanna:
Some considerations...

It could be a cultural thing. In some cultures baby girls have their ears pierced right after birth.

For better or worse, it is her parent's choice. Would you try to talk a mom out of circumcising her baby boy? The same argument that it is unnecessary pain could be made.

In my own experience, I've had a few DCK's (boys and girls) who've had earrings as infants (younger than a year) and have never had a problem with them.
Absolutely, it's cruel. I don't try more than once though, because it's not my child. I just keep hoping it becomes illegal. It hurts as much as having a toe nail torn off.

Ear piercing isn't any worse than a vaccination, pain wise.
Reply
Candy 03:58 PM 03-19-2014
Originally Posted by hwichlaz:
Absolutely, it's cruel. I don't try more than once though, because it's not my child. I just keep hoping it becomes illegal. It hurts as much as having a toe nail torn off.

Ear piercing isn't any worse than a vaccination, pain wise.
I don't think anyone should try and talk a parent out of circumcision. Its the parents choice and you dont know why they chose it. Some boys have to for medical reasons. And they cant make it illegal since sometimes its a religious choice.
Reply
hwichlaz 04:03 PM 03-19-2014
Originally Posted by Candy:
I don't think anyone should try and talk a parent out of circumcision. Its the parents choice and you dont know why they chose it. Some boys have to for medical reasons. And they cant make it illegal since sometimes its a religious choice.
Religious circumcision isn't done by a doctor, it's a religious ceremony. And only a cut is made, they don't remove anything. The medical reasons, are VERY rare. More and more doctors are refusing to do it, and insurance is no longer paying for it in many areas, because it's COSMETIC SURGERY.
Reply
Candy 05:04 PM 03-19-2014
Originally Posted by hwichlaz:
Religious circumcision isn't done by a doctor, it's a religious ceremony. And only a cut is made, they don't remove anything. The medical reasons, are VERY rare. More and more doctors are refusing to do it, and insurance is no longer paying for it in many areas, because it's COSMETIC SURGERY.
Its not as rare as you think there are 3 boys in my family who have had it done for medical reasons. But again its the parents choice so i never discourage or incourage it.
Reply
mountainside13 05:47 PM 03-19-2014
Originally Posted by Candy:
I don't think anyone should try and talk a parent out of circumcision. Its the parents choice and you dont know why they chose it. Some boys have to for medical reasons. And they cant make it illegal since sometimes its a religious choice.
I agree with Candy. It is the parents choice to decide if they want to circumcise or not. It is not our place or anyone else's place to tell a parent to not circumcise their child.
Reply
Tags:ear piercing, pierced ears
Reply Up