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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Christmas Gifts And Bonuses
wdmmom 02:19 PM 12-20-2011
I work for educated, career orientated parents. They all live in nice homes, drive nice cars and have great jobs.

Why is it every year they regift things to me?! I get stuck with rotten candles, bath beads, and lotions.

I got a gift from a family yesterday. It was a 3 in 1 blanket. REALLY?! I don't mean to be rude but why spend $35 on a blanket that I don't really need or want? I'd much rather get nothing at all or a nice note than for a parent to give me a bunch of unwanted things. Or, I'd rather they make a donation to the daycare and bring in a bunch of supplies if they don't want to give me money or a gift card.

I know money and gift cards seem impersonal but I'd much rather get a gift card to go out to dinner than have to cook. That's the best gift of all!

Would it be improper of me to pass out a list of items needed for the daycare next year asking that they supply some boxes of tissues, craft supplies, lysol, toilet paper, etc rather than buying me gifts?
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Zoe 02:51 PM 12-20-2011
I don't think it would be inappropriate ONLY if you have parents that always give you gifts. Otherwise, it might seem presumptuous, kwim?
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kidkair 03:35 PM 12-20-2011
You could send out a newsletter for January and say something like: I appreciate all the wonderful gifts you gave me. I especially enjoyed the gift cards to restaurants, it's great to get out after a busy day. Thanks also for the daycare craft supplies, that really shows be how much you appreciate the crafts I send home with your kids.

One or two of the parents might get the message and give you those things next year. Just remember to thank them the same way next year too. I found posting a thank you to all who returned renewal paperwork early helped everyone get theirs in. All the parents read it and assumed they were the only ones running late. Truth was that no one had got the paperwork back before I posted the thank you note and I had all the paperwork back in two days.
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JenNJ 04:15 PM 12-20-2011
Originally Posted by kidkair:
I found posting a thank you to all who returned renewal paperwork early helped everyone get theirs in. All the parents read it and assumed they were the only ones running late. Truth was that no one had got the paperwork back before I posted the thank you note and I had all the paperwork back in two days.
I did something similar for Friday. I made an off-hand comment about how only a couple of kids would be here. Everyone asked when the last kid was leaving. I told them all after nap. So I am done at 3pm on Friday. Yay!
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Lucy 09:41 PM 12-20-2011
Originally Posted by kidkair:
You could send out a newsletter for January and say something like: I appreciate all the wonderful gifts you gave me. I especially enjoyed the gift cards to restaurants, it's great to get out after a busy day. Thanks also for the daycare craft supplies, that really shows be how much you appreciate the crafts I send home with your kids.

One or two of the parents might get the message and give you those things next year. Just remember to thank them the same way next year too. I found posting a thank you to all who returned renewal paperwork early helped everyone get theirs in. All the parents read it and assumed they were the only ones running late. Truth was that no one had got the paperwork back before I posted the thank you note and I had all the paperwork back in two days.
LOVE this!! This is soooo ME!! Maybe I'm chicken sometimes, but I find clever ways to get around uncomfortable things. LOL.
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Crystal 06:46 AM 12-21-2011
I think it is the thought that counts. I think it is rude to ask for anything and I think it is rude to not be appreciative of what you are given.

I could imagine what the responses would be like here if this was a child we were talking about.
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LittleD 06:47 AM 12-21-2011
Originally Posted by kidkair:
You could send out a newsletter for January and say something like: I appreciate all the wonderful gifts you gave me. I especially enjoyed the gift cards to restaurants, it's great to get out after a busy day. :
That part is great, but if you would rather have supplies then presents, add "Instead of giving gifts to me, the children and I would really appreciate these craft supplies for our daycare. (list item examples) We all enjoy our craft time and these items are things we go through really fast" or something to that effect.
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meganlavonnesmommy 06:56 AM 12-21-2011
At least you get something. Most of my families give nothing. Even though I take great care to plan and make great crafts for the kids to take home, the kids make a gift for the parents, and I give each family a cookie tray with homemade goodies. A select few each year give me something, and some of the gifts have been really nice. But the majority dont give anything.

Like you said, I'd be just as happy with a nice card thanking me for all that I do.
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dEHmom 07:22 AM 12-21-2011
I don't think it would be inappropriate at all of you to do it, just in a way that doesn't sound like you expect something.
My dd's school sent home a notice saying that these are a list of books that your classroom needs, at the booksale that if you'd like, you could buy them and they'll even wrap them for a christmas present for the teacher, and books will remain in the classroom.

Also, I know that usually when people don't really know you well enough to know what you'd like, they opt for lotions, soaps, etc. So maybe it's not a regift?


one of my dcf's gave me a $50 gift card for the whole family to go to dinner and a beautiful card saying how much they appreciate everything I do, and how well I take care of dcb. He runs to me in the morning and hugs and kisses me.


Another dcf who I didn't expect anything from (even thought I know the grandma bought the stuff - she works with my dh- it was still very nice) gave me a box of my fav chocolates cause dh said that's what I want, haha, and they gave each of my own children a present too!

The other family, I don't know if they will give me anything, and I don't expect anything either. They have only been here a month, but I hope I get a card at least. If not I won't be hurt.
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melissa ann 07:34 AM 12-21-2011
Originally Posted by meganlavonnesmommy:
At least you get something. Most of my families give nothing. Even though I take great care to plan and make great crafts for the kids to take home, the kids make a gift for the parents, and I give each family a cookie tray with homemade goodies. A select few each year give me something, and some of the gifts have been really nice. But the majority dont give anything.

Like you said, I'd be just as happy with a nice card thanking me for all that I do.
Same here.
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melskids 07:36 AM 12-21-2011
I've gotten everything from a homemade card, to a framed picture of the childs handprints, to a cash gift worth twice my weekly rate, and everything in between.

I never expect anything, then when I do receive something, it is a great surprise!

I'm always greatful for whatever parents give me, and just happy they even thought of me. A hand written note of thanks always wins, hands down!
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Unregistered 07:49 AM 12-21-2011
I'm logged out for being ashamed of how I feel. I have only been in buisness for a few years. One year at Christmas I was on Maternaty, another all my families had been laid off for the winter months, one year all I had was my sisters children, and this is the first year that I have actuall kids at Christmas time. Even when I was 12 or 13 doing baby sitting I have recieved some kind of a Christmas bonus from the families that watched on weekends or evenings. It was only 10 to 20 dollars, but that was almost 20 years ago. I was surprised the first year. My mom told me that on "Oprah" she said you were suppose to tip your daycare provider a weeks worth of pay. My mom always gave that to the daycare provider for my little sisters. I had my daugher when I was 18. My parents helped me pay for daycare while I went to school and they gave her daycare provider a weeks worth of pay as a bonus. When I started paying for the daycare myself I always gave a weeks worth of pay. I did have one lady for a few years that charged by the hour and only when the child came. With her I always gave her two weeks of pay, plus I made sure I paid her for Christmas, Christmas Eve, and any other extra day I might have gotten off.
My families tell me at least once a week how they are so lucky to have me as a provider. Most of my kids were only suppose to come for 2 months while the regular daycare provider was on Maternaty and 1/2 way through the stay they all asked if I would be able to take them on permanetly. When I started getting gifts this year my heart kind of dropped. I recieved framed pictures of there family, some stinky soap basket, and a couple of 20 gift cards. I thanked every one for the gifts and I was told "Oh you deserve it." I kind of felt like it was a slap in the face. I could see if they were low income, but they aren't. Like I said I'm ashamed on how I feel. I should be greatful for anything. I will be changing my contracts so that I get paid for when children don't show and maybe a few paid holidays from now on and won't count on anything from my families. I was also thinking of raising my rates $5 a week. Stick that $5 in a envelope every week and next Christmas open it up and be like "Merry Christmas to Me."
I don't think there is anything wrong with asking the families not to buy you anything and having them donate craft supplies to the daycare.
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cheerfuldom 09:05 AM 12-21-2011
Some people who do a lot of general type gifts like bath stuff or blankets are sometimes the people that re-gift or just buy the same thing for everyone they know. Not that thats a terrible thing but I can see how someone might be a little miffed to not receive something a little more heartfelt.

I got a $100 in cash from one of my families....now thats what I am talkin' about!!
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wdmmom 09:16 AM 12-21-2011
Originally Posted by cheerfuldom:
Some people who do a lot of general type gifts like bath stuff or blankets are sometimes the people that re-gift or just buy the same thing for everyone they know. Not that thats a terrible thing but I can see how someone might be a little miffed to not receive something a little more heartfelt.

I got a $100 in cash from one of my families....now thats what I am talkin' about!!
I got a $50 gift card to the movie theater! SWEET! That's what I'm sayin! A night out for FREE! Love it!!!
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Ariana 09:32 AM 12-21-2011
Originally Posted by :
My mom told me that on "Oprah" she said you were suppose to tip your daycare provider a weeks worth of pay.
WOW! Really? I don't get anywhere near that! One family gave me a big fat nothing. Not even a card. My families are pretty well off too. It doesn't upset me really it's just funny how some people treat the people who are caring for their children. It boggles the mind
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GretasLittleFriends 10:00 AM 12-21-2011
I'm usually not given physical gifts, but my parents are constantly thanking me. I would love to get a week's pay as an added bonus, but know times are tough and most of my families are just making it paycheck to paycheck. Knowing I make a difference in their lives and that they appreciate me is a wonderful feeling though.

I did get a present this morning though, which is wonderful. I got a pair of mittens made from old sweaters. I tried them on, they fit, they're double layered, and VERY WARM!! In Minnesota, this is a wonderful gift.
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Everyday_Mom 10:00 AM 12-21-2011
At what point did society become so entitled that people are complaining about GIFTS?
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LittleD 10:05 AM 12-21-2011
Your feelings are your own, I wouldn't be ashamed, who doesn't like getting gifts and when they give you a picture of the child you watch (like I have gotten) I think ''Oh how nice, now I can add it to the other 3000000 I have already taken of him myself, LOL!'' I have one family that gets us little gifts, my children myself and the daycare. I always felt bad because I never got her anything, just crafty stuff her child made. This year I got all of the kids a magnetic book, a colouring book and crayons. It's not much, but it is a token to celebrate Christmas. Kids don't put dollar value on things, and quantity is better then quality in their eyes, LOL! They will like it and thats all that matters, at least that's what I tell myself.
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dEHmom 10:08 AM 12-21-2011
Originally Posted by Everyday_Mom:
At what point did society become so entitled that people are complaining about GIFTS?
I agree. DH's work has never given out gifts for christmas before, this year they gave out a gift basket. It's not a cheap basket either, it's from an expensive well known Italian place in the city. It's food stuff we would probably never use or buy ever, but I know for a fact it's expensive stuff and it came with cheese in it too.
Everyone at my DH's work complained. It's a large factory with probably a good 5000 plus employees. Even if these baskets only cost the company $5 just add that up, $25000. They were saying stuff like "i'd rather have got nothing".

While I feel we deserve some recognition as an important person in the dcf's lives, I don't think it's a monetary thing, or material thing that shows that. A card that says thank you for all you do, or something along those lines is what is going to last. Not a box of chocolates, not a gift card, not money, nothing else goes as far as a thank you.
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Heidi 10:32 AM 12-21-2011
Originally Posted by kidkair:
You could send out a newsletter for January and say something like: I appreciate all the wonderful gifts you gave me. I especially enjoyed the gift cards to restaurants, it's great to get out after a busy day. Thanks also for the daycare craft supplies, that really shows be how much you appreciate the crafts I send home with your kids.

One or two of the parents might get the message and give you those things next year. Just remember to thank them the same way next year too. I found posting a thank you to all who returned renewal paperwork early helped everyone get theirs in. All the parents read it and assumed they were the only ones running late. Truth was that no one had got the paperwork back before I posted the thank you note and I had all the paperwork back in two days.
wow are you clever! awesome....
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Heidi 10:40 AM 12-21-2011
Originally Posted by Everyday_Mom:
At what point did society become so entitled that people are complaining about GIFTS?

In a way you're right, of course.

For the most part, we are wishing more than complaining, I think. Most people who work for a company get a year end or Christmas Bonus of some sort. Childcare providers work long hours, and most of us aren't exactly making a fortune, and then to give a lot more than "care" to our children.

We are not entitled to anything, but like everyone, we would like to be appreciated. That's all.
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Crystal 10:43 AM 12-21-2011
Originally Posted by bbo:
In a way you're right, of course.

For the most part, we are wishing more than complaining, I think. Most people who work for a company get a year end or Christmas Bonus of some sort. Childcare providers work long hours, and most of us aren't exactly making a fortune, and then to give a lot more than "care" to our children.

We are not entitled to anything, but like everyone, we would like to be appreciated. That's all.
Sure. But that OP was a complaint. Not a wish.

I say learn to expect nothing and appreciating even the smallest gesture. Even if secretly you don't like it.
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Unregistered 11:10 AM 12-21-2011
not all parents get holiday or year end bonuses... They've never given them out at my company and my husband has been at a couple companies over the past few years and never gotten them there either (and it's not because we're crappy employees or anything, they just don't do it, for anyone).
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Unregistered 11:15 AM 12-21-2011
My daughter's preschool teacher sent this note home a couple of weeks before Christmas. I thought it was worded very nicely.

"In the past, some of the preschool children have generously provided gifts for their preschool teacher and para-educator. In lieu of personal Christmas gifts, we would like to recommend some items for the classroom that the children would enjoy. Please know that gifts are not necessary but if you were planning to purchase a gift, here are some suggestions:" Followed by a list of items.
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MyAngels 11:34 AM 12-21-2011
Originally Posted by Crystal:
Sure. But that OP was a complaint. Not a wish.

I say learn to expect nothing and appreciating even the smallest gesture. Even if secretly you don't like it.
I agree with this. The only thing I expect from my families is that they pay (on time) and follow the rules set forth in my contract. Do that, and I'm a happy camper.

I've received plenty of wonderful gifts, some not so wonderful, and one or two families over the years have given nothing at all. Whatever they do at Christmas time doesn't make me think better or worse of them.
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laundrymom 11:38 AM 12-21-2011
I have received a vast varying in the gift department from a huge bunch of homemade candies and puppy chow. That I love!!!! To one family " tipping" me $15!!!! I've cared for their children for 4 1/2 years and it's always the same.

My top 3 fav gifts,.....
12 gift cards for a local bakery/coffee shop. For me to go out once a month, sip coffee, eat snacks I don't have to share, and relax.

A gift card to have my truck tires rotated. I had commented thT I hated helping dh rotate tires, then cell and hurt my arm the next day. We had 38 in tires and they were huge and heavy. How feeaking awesome and thoughtful was that?!

I had a dad who worked at ups. He took my Christmas packages to work AND paid postage!!

Worst, a fruit basket. Containing a coconut. I'm allergic. They knew. Ugh
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momma2girls 11:57 AM 12-21-2011
I have always given great XMas gifts to all my daycare children every yr. I would spend about $25-$35.00 on each of them. Up until I moved to a larger city, and one yr. I received one ornament, from one of the families out of 4 of them and that was it. I never received a thank you for their gifts, nothing!! That was heartbreaking to me!! From now on, I spend about 10-$15.00 on each of them. I have gotten new parents since then, and all but one family have gotten me a Christmas present this yr. Last yr. I had before school boys and I didn't charge them near what I should have charge them- I didn't even receive a thank you for their gifts I gave them. I spent about $15.00-$20.00 on each one of them, and I received nothing in return, not even a thank you. Sometimes it's quite hard to take in, not even receving a card, a thank you, etc... it hurts, but oh well, move on...... This yr. I received 2 gift cards, which I totally love!!
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KEG123 11:57 AM 12-21-2011
I always say "Never look a gift horse in the mouth."

I'm surprised some of you are complaining about giftcards, candles, etc. I'd be happy they at least thought of you!!

I probably won't get anything. I don't expect to! Sure it would be nice! But to me, Christmas is about giving and not recieving.

One of the daycare families came in today with a gift for my son and the other daycare boy here, too. I was surprised and very happy she thought of them!
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Sugar Magnolia 12:02 PM 12-21-2011
I expect nothing money-wise, so if I do get something, I'm pretty happy with whatever it is. In these economic times, I wouldn't dream of asking, or making a "wish list" of supplies. I charge $175 a year for an annual supply fee, so I'd never ask parents to donate items to the school. I gladly accept them, however. Now, if you DON'T charge a supply fee, a wish list is ok, but honestly, I wouldn't do this during the Holidays, sorry. What I DO expect is respect, kindness and honesty from my families and I have received plenty of that this year already. That is free and easy to give and much less awkward to accept. There is another thread that asks if we give gifts to parents? Yep. I give out respect, kindness and honesty, as well as loving, worry-free care to their children all year round. Tips, gifts and bonuses are just that. Expect nothing and you will be pleasantly suprised if you do get something. My motto for life, basically.
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Blackcat31 02:29 PM 12-21-2011
I expect nothing from my DCF's. Not that I think they wouldn't give gifts to me but because I have a job, I do my job, I get paid for it.

I take paid vacation during this time of the year also so I don't think I should get a gift on top of all that.

I also don't get bent out of shape if I don't hear a thank you now and then either.

I guess the way I see it is most my families stay with me until their kids age out of my program. I haven't had to actively look for new enrollees in several years and have gotten new DCK's through referral from current families. THAT tells me they appreciate what I do.

Plus they keep coming back happy every morning....LOL!!
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DCMom 04:08 PM 12-21-2011
Blackcat, well said.

I feel appreciated every single day. I am blessed to have my families ~ they pay on time, pick up/drop off on time, rarely bring a sick child, don't begrudge me my time off, refer me to their friends ~ anything else I receive on top of that is truly a bonus.

I do give them and the kids Christmas gifts, not because I expect something in return, but because I really love to do those kinds of things. It brings me happiness to help the kids make their gift for mom and dad. It makes me happy to give 'client gifts' ~ they need to know that I appreciate them as much as they appreciate me. It's a two way street, kwim?
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frgsonmysox 05:34 PM 12-21-2011
I try to teach my kids that getting gifts is not what should be expected - EVER.

To complain about what I get or don't get would completely fly in the face of that. If I ever get a gift from anyone, I am appreciative. I don't care how small it may seem to you (or me), it might have been that persons last $5/$10 or $15. The person who complained for getting $20 giftcards? Seriously? When we bought our kids teachers gifts we could only afford a $25 gift card each. Not everyone has a couple hundred dollars lying around.
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Christian Mother 05:47 PM 12-21-2011
I've only been in business for 3 yrs now and some times I get a gift sometimes i don't and I don't mind at all. For me, I live to make things for the parents and seeing the kids enjoying making and giving. It's the same way when my children make something for me...they spend so much time at school making it their dying to have me open it even before xmas. That is what Christmas is all about to me...the giving part. I don't care if I get a gift or not. My daughters school send memo's out letting us know if we wanted to gift our teachers this yr there was a list of much need class items and that would make their day. I thought that was really nice and not tacky at all. It didn't make it seem like I HAD to buy a gift either. If a parent gave me a regift gift..I would happy except it. I could put it to use..I could find a use for it. You will if your not making ends meet and funds are very low. Anything is something. Not trying to make you feel bad but "The gift of giving" is precious. Thank those that give and mean it.
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kendallina 07:29 PM 12-21-2011
I don't understand expecting anything for Christmas from daycare families. I'm not saying that I don't secretly hope for small gifts (I LOVE me a starbucks giftcard!), but seriously, to complain about gifts that you receive. I just don't understand it.
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MommyofThree 04:21 AM 12-22-2011
Originally Posted by Crystal:
I think it is the thought that counts. I think it is rude to ask for anything and I think it is rude to not be appreciative of what you are given.

I could imagine what the responses would be like here if this was a child we were talking about.
You are 100 % right!!!!!!!!!!!! Where is the love it button..

Im sorry but, yes it is the thought that counts and you sound ungrateful and very rude
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MommyofThree 04:29 AM 12-22-2011
Originally Posted by Everyday_Mom:
At what point did society become so entitled that people are complaining about GIFTS?
You my dear are 100 % right as well as crystal. Christmas is NOT about gifts but about jesus!!!!!!!! It seems like nobody cares about the true meaning of CHRISTMAS
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themoorethemerrier 05:05 AM 12-22-2011
I was thinking along the same lines as this. Though I'd appreciate just about any gift that they gave, I'd love to be able tell them or for them to know that it's well-loved and used regularly.



Originally Posted by Unregistered:
My daughter's preschool teacher sent this note home a couple of weeks before Christmas. I thought it was worded very nicely.

"In the past, some of the preschool children have generously provided gifts for their preschool teacher and para-educator. In lieu of personal Christmas gifts, we would like to recommend some items for the classroom that the children would enjoy. Please know that gifts are not necessary but if you were planning to purchase a gift, here are some suggestions:" Followed by a list of items.

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mac60 05:25 AM 12-22-2011
Originally Posted by wdmmom:
I work for educated, career orientated parents. They all live in nice homes, drive nice cars and have great jobs.

Why is it every year they regift things to me?! I get stuck with rotten candles, bath beads, and lotions.

I got a gift from a family yesterday. It was a 3 in 1 blanket. REALLY?! I don't mean to be rude but why spend $35 on a blanket that I don't really need or want? I'd much rather get nothing at all or a nice note than for a parent to give me a bunch of unwanted things. Or, I'd rather they make a donation to the daycare and bring in a bunch of supplies if they don't want to give me money or a gift card.

I know money and gift cards seem impersonal but I'd much rather get a gift card to go out to dinner than have to cook. That's the best gift of all!

Would it be improper of me to pass out a list of items needed for the daycare next year asking that they supply some boxes of tissues, craft supplies, lysol, toilet paper, etc rather than buying me gifts?
_____________________________________________________

I totally understand how you feel. While Christmas is the celebration of Jesus, it too is a celebration and a time to thank, express gratitude, show you care, show you love and appreciate, etc, etc, those people in our lives that we care about, make our lives easier, are a part of our daily life, a time to show appreciation. It is a time to do a little something extra for that "special" person in your and your families life. I personally think some of the comments left here are kind of cold. It is nice to give a gift to the provider, (I did this for over 8 years when my own kids were in childcare) a gift that comes with thought, care and consideration of the provider. That in itself shows appreciation. Giving a gift has been around at Christmas for a lot of years....

Even with my family struggling extensively this past 2 years due to job loss, I managed to buy a nice gift for every day care child and I put thought behind it. There is a saying that seems to apply to people more and more......The more you have the less you give. I would much rather be on the "I have less and give more end" than the I have it all, including the nice house, nice cars, good paying steady income, and be the parent that puts little thought or no thought into the showing appreciation and thanks to their daycare provider. Or the parent who gives nothing to their provider of 9 years.

So original poster, you are not wrong in feeling these thoughts, they are true feelings.
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countrymom 06:01 AM 12-22-2011
Originally Posted by DCMom:
Blackcat, well said.

I feel appreciated every single day. I am blessed to have my families ~ they pay on time, pick up/drop off on time, rarely bring a sick child, don't begrudge me my time off, refer me to their friends ~ anything else I receive on top of that is truly a bonus.

I do give them and the kids Christmas gifts, not because I expect something in return, but because I really love to do those kinds of things. It brings me happiness to help the kids make their gift for mom and dad. It makes me happy to give 'client gifts' ~ they need to know that I appreciate them as much as they appreciate me. It's a two way street, kwim?
I agree!!!
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SilverSabre25 07:17 AM 12-22-2011
Originally Posted by melissathayer28:
You my dear are 100 % right as well as crystal. Christmas is NOT about gifts but about jesus!!!!!!!! It seems like nobody cares about the true meaning of CHRISTMAS
Not to start a religious debate but.......(flame suit on)...

Do you not give any gifts, receive any gifts, bake any cookies or other treats, decorate with anything but a nativity scene, watch any holiday specials, etc? Do YOU spend the entire season immersed in a reverent celebration of Jesus' birth, with NO secular cares whatsoever?

I'm sorry, but there are SO MANY different celebrations from around the world that occur during this time, that I still can't get my mind around this insistence that Jesus is the "reason for the season" (and I hate that phrase, it takes a lot of effort to type it). The Roman Saturnalia and the religious persecution of early Christians is the actual "reason" for the season.

In our modern world there are as many different meanings for this time of year as there are religions in the world. Almost every culture or religion has a major celebration right now, around the solstice. They differ greatly, but most are very similar in theme--a celebration of life, love, light, happiness, and warmth. Really, when you boil it down, that's what even the Christmas story of Jesus' birth boils down to. THAT is the meaning of the season, thank you very much.

Go ahead; I'm ready for a good char-broiling.
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mac60 07:21 AM 12-22-2011
Totally agree with you, as I said in my previous post....."While Christmas is the celebration of Jesus, it too is a celebration and a time to thank, express gratitude, show you care, show you love and appreciate, etc, etc, those people in our lives that we care about, make our lives easier, are a part of our daily life, a time to show appreciation. It is a time to do a little something extra for that "special" person in your and your families life. ".
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Blackcat31 07:27 AM 12-22-2011
..... and adding to Silver's post, just because someone is a christian doesnt mean everyone is and for some people Christmas IS nothing more than a commercial holiday. Which is their right to participate in without being condemned for "doing it wrong". To each his/her own. I do what is right for MY family and allow others the same right WITH respect.
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KEG123 07:37 AM 12-22-2011
Originally Posted by SilverSabre25:
Not to start a religious debate but.......(flame suit on)...

Do you not give any gifts, receive any gifts, bake any cookies or other treats, decorate with anything but a nativity scene, watch any holiday specials, etc? Do YOU spend the entire season immersed in a reverent celebration of Jesus' birth, with NO secular cares whatsoever?

I'm sorry, but there are SO MANY different celebrations from around the world that occur during this time, that I still can't get my mind around this insistence that Jesus is the "reason for the season" (and I hate that phrase, it takes a lot of effort to type it). The Roman Saturnalia and the religious persecution of early Christians is the actual "reason" for the season.

In our modern world there are as many different meanings for this time of year as there are religions in the world. Almost every culture or religion has a major celebration right now, around the solstice. They differ greatly, but most are very similar in theme--a celebration of life, love, light, happiness, and warmth. Really, when you boil it down, that's what even the Christmas story of Jesus' birth boils down to. THAT is the meaning of the season, thank you very much.

Go ahead; I'm ready for a good char-broiling.
No charbroiling here! I
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frgsonmysox 07:50 AM 12-22-2011
Thank you!! I wanted to say something but I couldn't. I'm pagan and my husband is an atheist, we celebrate Yule/Christmas even though we aren't Christian. Christmas is about so much more than THAT, especially when Jesus was though to be born in the Spring, and the Christians "stole" the Christmas traditions from the Pagans.
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Zoe 07:51 AM 12-22-2011
Originally Posted by SilverSabre25:
Not to start a religious debate but.......(flame suit on)...

Do you not give any gifts, receive any gifts, bake any cookies or other treats, decorate with anything but a nativity scene, watch any holiday specials, etc? Do YOU spend the entire season immersed in a reverent celebration of Jesus' birth, with NO secular cares whatsoever?

I'm sorry, but there are SO MANY different celebrations from around the world that occur during this time, that I still can't get my mind around this insistence that Jesus is the "reason for the season" (and I hate that phrase, it takes a lot of effort to type it). The Roman Saturnalia and the religious persecution of early Christians is the actual "reason" for the season.

In our modern world there are as many different meanings for this time of year as there are religions in the world. Almost every culture or religion has a major celebration right now, around the solstice. They differ greatly, but most are very similar in theme--a celebration of life, love, light, happiness, and warmth. Really, when you boil it down, that's what even the Christmas story of Jesus' birth boils down to. THAT is the meaning of the season, thank you very much.

Go ahead; I'm ready for a good char-broiling.

Thank you!
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Unregistered 09:35 AM 12-22-2011
Originally Posted by frgsonmysox:
Thank you!! I wanted to say something but I couldn't. I'm pagan and my husband is an atheist, we celebrate Yule/Christmas even though we aren't Christian. Christmas is about so much more than THAT, especially when Jesus was though to be born in the Spring, and the Christians "stole" the Christmas traditions from the Pagans.
I knew there was a reason I didn't like your other posts. Now I know. Interesting idea, incorrect however.
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kidkair 12:28 PM 12-22-2011
Originally Posted by SilverSabre25:
Not to start a religious debate but.......(flame suit on)...

Do you not give any gifts, receive any gifts, bake any cookies or other treats, decorate with anything but a nativity scene, watch any holiday specials, etc? Do YOU spend the entire season immersed in a reverent celebration of Jesus' birth, with NO secular cares whatsoever?

I'm sorry, but there are SO MANY different celebrations from around the world that occur during this time, that I still can't get my mind around this insistence that Jesus is the "reason for the season" (and I hate that phrase, it takes a lot of effort to type it). The Roman Saturnalia and the religious persecution of early Christians is the actual "reason" for the season.

In our modern world there are as many different meanings for this time of year as there are religions in the world. Almost every culture or religion has a major celebration right now, around the solstice. They differ greatly, but most are very similar in theme--a celebration of life, love, light, happiness, and warmth. Really, when you boil it down, that's what even the Christmas story of Jesus' birth boils down to. THAT is the meaning of the season, thank you very much.

Go ahead; I'm ready for a good char-broiling.
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
..... and adding to Silver's post, just because someone is a christian doesnt mean everyone is and for some people Christmas IS nothing more than a commercial holiday. Which is their right to participate in without being condemned for "doing it wrong". To each his/her own. I do what is right for MY family and allow others the same right WITH respect.
These posts made my day! Thank you for sticking up for other faiths. I try to do the same and get so tired of those who think only their faith is right and all other faiths are wrong. Every person has a unique look at faith and beliefs because every person is unique.

Originally Posted by frgsonmysox:
Thank you!! I wanted to say something but I couldn't. I'm pagan and my husband is an atheist, we celebrate Yule/Christmas even though we aren't Christian. Christmas is about so much more than THAT, especially when Jesus was though to be born in the Spring, and the Christians "stole" the Christmas traditions from the Pagans.
Thanks! Too bad someone had to be so close minded to reply with this:
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
I knew there was a reason I didn't like your other posts. Now I know. Interesting idea, incorrect however.
Unregistered: I'd like to see your proof that what frgsonmysox is saying is wrong because it is well documented that Christmas traditions were transitioned from Pagan traditions. If Christmas was really honestly just about Jesus being born in a barn wouldn't the traditions revolve more around making houses like barns and spreading sawdust and straw out on the floors for warmth instead of lighting candles and bringing in the pine trees for decoration? I'm sure that Jesus was probably not born under a pine tree no matter how you try and explain that away.
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Texasjeepgirl 12:33 PM 12-22-2011
Originally Posted by SilverSabre25:
Not to start a religious debate but.......(flame suit on)...

Do you not give any gifts, receive any gifts, bake any cookies or other treats, decorate with anything but a nativity scene, watch any holiday specials, etc? Do YOU spend the entire season immersed in a reverent celebration of Jesus' birth, with NO secular cares whatsoever?

I'm sorry, but there are SO MANY different celebrations from around the world that occur during this time, that I still can't get my mind around this insistence that Jesus is the "reason for the season" (and I hate that phrase, it takes a lot of effort to type it). The Roman Saturnalia and the religious persecution of early Christians is the actual "reason" for the season.

In our modern world there are as many different meanings for this time of year as there are religions in the world. Almost every culture or religion has a major celebration right now, around the solstice. They differ greatly, but most are very similar in theme--a celebration of life, love, light, happiness, and warmth. Really, when you boil it down, that's what even the Christmas story of Jesus' birth boils down to. THAT is the meaning of the season, thank you very much.

Go ahead; I'm ready for a good char-broiling.

Reply
wdmmom 12:53 PM 12-22-2011
My husband and I both are agnostic. Regardless of your reason for celebrating Christmas, we feel it is a time to reflect upon what the past year has brought to us...some good and some not so good and a time to be around friends and family.

Just because my and my husband's religious beliefs aren't the same as others, we dont' discriminate against...especially towards children. We enjoy very much keeping the Christmas spirit alive. That's why we celebrate.
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Sunchimes 05:12 AM 12-23-2011
Ah, my last family thought of me. Long ago, I complimented her on her perfume, and she remembered and bought me some. What a nice family. I think that's all I wanted, just one person to do something thoughtful. I am thoroughly satisfied and feel appreciated. I've been beaming all morning.
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boysx5 08:04 AM 12-23-2011
I am very lucky to have caring families one of my families even buys gifts for my five boys. I always get nice cards to tell me how much they appreciate I do all year. This year I got a coach purse something I would never buy for myself and the mom said she knew that and that was why she wanted to treat me she thinks I deserve it. I appreciate that they think of me
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MamaBear 08:21 AM 12-23-2011
Your lucky your daycare parents got you anything. A couple of mine gave me really sweet gifts but the other two didn't even say Merry Christmas to me or even a card. Does make me feel unappreciated. I would have loved to even get some re-gifted lotion or blanket. Your lucky they thought of you - no matter what they gave to you.
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JenNJ 09:13 AM 12-23-2011
Personally, I expect at the very least a thank you from every parent. I go far above and beyond my duties and think of the families and kids even when I'm off the clock. I take notice of things they have said and remember them. I send a text when i see something they love on sale or offer to pick it up for them.

While gifts are nice, the things I keep forever are handwritten thank you notes. I have dozens saved from over a decade of working with kids. They cost only time and never go out of style. So yes, I expect something at Christmas.

Op, you aren't wrong for feeling let down. It isn't the monetary value of a gift. It is that you open your heart, home, and life to these families. At the very least they can take a moment to show some appreciation for what we do each day. We care for the worlds most valuable resource and deserve to be treated so. So yes, it hurts when a parent gives a gift of a coconut you are allergic to, or bath salts you never use. They see you each day, they speak with you, they are in your home. They should know something, anything, about you as a person and take the time to acknowledge that by giving a token gift to one of the most important people in their childs lives.
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momofboys 09:29 AM 12-23-2011
My family gave me a $50 grocery gift card & paid me for 2 days I was supposed to be off (I wouldn't have had them pay me) so it was very nice & unexpected.
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saved4always 07:51 PM 01-13-2012
All of my kids' have a parent who is a teacher so they usually give me nice gifts with a nice note of appreciation. I have a friend who also has a home daycare though who got a used candle (yes it had been burned!) and hand soap last year. This year someone gave her SHAMPOO...not a special kind. They gave her Suave shampoo. She figures that they must be trying to tell her that she had dirty hands, dirty hair and that her house smells...LOL!
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