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Mister Sir Husband 06:22 PM 01-05-2014
Ok, so I've been enjoying the stories about your worst interview, but how about your worst termination? What happened to make you shake your head in disbelief and think "you are so outta here"?
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sharlan 06:25 PM 01-05-2014
I haven't terminated many families in 30 years. The one I did was because the son started making some serious false accusations after I'd had the family (3 kids) for 6 years. The mom knew they were lies, but the dad believed them.
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Annalee 06:46 PM 01-05-2014
I have only terminated 3 times in over 20 years. I guess the worst was when the state subsidy office called me pleading the case of a client that had went there complaining because she was going to have to pay me vacation pay. (I had offered this client a payment plan way ahead of time where she could pay very little a week to cover vacation) Obviously, this client was clueless that I would know it was her, so when she entered the dc that evening in her giggly smiley way, I gave her a stern look saying "you need to find alternate daycare" and handed her the term letter and I also sent a copy of the letter to the subsidy office. The client "tried" to lay on my shoulder and started crying....needless to say that DID NOT WORK. I backed away and just stared at her. She left crying and wailing at how hard it was going to be for her kids to adjust to a new daycare... I told her she should have thought about that before she pulled her backstabbing stunt.
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Lucy 06:54 PM 01-05-2014
Very early on in doing DC - probably about 18 yrs ago - I had a family of 2 boys and a girl who were all school agers. There was no discipline at home. The girl was fine. She was about 10. The boys were about 8 and 6 and were wild. I was young and wondered what was wrong with me that I couldn't handle them. I think I thought if I complained to mom, it would be obvious that I wasn't doing my job. Again, I was young and new to DC!!!

So on no-school days, the boys would bring their bikes. (I'd never do that now, but back then I just went with whatever.) They used to ride them up the little berm of bark chips that my next door neighbors used as landscaping. It left rut marks from the tires in the bark chips. I would always tell them not to do that, but these boys didn't care what I said!

My husband had a police and fire scanner that would also occasionally pick up a cordless phone call. We heard the husband call home, and the wife telling him how mad she's getting because of "those boys next door" continuing to ride up onto their property, and they talked about whether they should come over and have a talk with my husband and me.

I knew then that I had to term. I was soooo nervous! Back then, I felt like my job was to handle and correct all problems, and if I snitched on the kids, it would reflect badly on me. When I did muster up the courage, she was totally shocked. She flatly denied that her kids would do things like that. My husband was sitting nearby and kind of let out a laugh, and it pissed her off really bad! So we figured we might as well go for it, and began to list alllllll the crazy stuff her boys had done over the year and a half or so that they had been here. She called us liars, and after about 10 minutes of back and forth, my husband said it was time for her to leave.

Yeah, THAT was fun!!!
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Msdunny 07:01 PM 01-05-2014
I have only terminated once. I had spent a weekend throwing up, feverish, sicker than I had been in years. I let all my parents know I couldn't open that Monday morning. One particular dcm told me she just could not miss work. She was fairly new at her job, so I let her bring her two kids for the day.

Later in the day, my dd came in to tell me that Mrs. _____ (dcm) was on Facebook, talking about being at home because she had a cold and didn't feel good. They were asked to leave, and she really didn't understand my reasons for letting them go.
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Happily_wed 04:48 AM 01-06-2014
I have only had three families as I prefer to keep only one family at a time. And it seems I am horrible at reading people so I end up with horrible families lol. I termed the first two families I had. The first because even though I kept a written log of EVERYTHING (which of her children were here on what days, what they ate, what time they napped etc) she wanted to argue that I was overcharging her. I gave her two weeks notice to find someone and she was upset but accepted it.

The second I termed because she was going six weeks at a time without paying me, not calling or showing up on days the child was supposed to be here etc. She was forever dragging out drop off and making snarky comments about how her kid hated to be here, cried for an hour when she told them they had to come here, etc. Her kid LOVED being here and snuggled with me all day and was very happy here. The last straw was when she called here and left a message while I was at the bus stop with my kids telling me her kid wanted to go to grandma's that day so she was taking him there instead of here. I called her back and left a nice long, not very nice message for her too lol. She then called me later and again left a message telling me she assumed it was ok to pay me every six weeks. What did I care as long as I got paid at some point? And telling me if "you need a break from daycare all you had to do was say so!" UGH!
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Soccermom 05:49 AM 01-06-2014
Originally Posted by Mister Sir Husband:
Ok, so I've been enjoying the stories about your worst interview, but how about your worst termination? What happened to make you shake your head in disbelief and think "you are so outta here"?
Worst termination ever for me was a DCK who was stealing from my kids and my home. DCM used all kinds of tactics to avoid me terming like blaming it on an anxiety disorder, offering to replace all the items and in remained in just plain complete denial that her DD had some serious issues.

I tried hard to work for the family since I took psychology in University and genuinely felt bad for DCG but when she started carving her name in my furniture we both knew it was over.

When I termed DCM called me 3 times crying and almost hyperventilating on the phone. She was at wits end and had no idea what else to do. This had obviously happened elsewhere IMO.

I felt bad for her but why put your child's problems on someone else. Change your job, work hours or lifestyle in order to be home for her.
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sally 06:23 AM 01-06-2014
I had to terminate a family who was totally awful and the worst part is she had been my old daycare provider when my oldest was a baby. She had 2 boys an 18 month old that wanted held all day long or cried and a 7 year old who I found out was stealing small toys from us and tried to get my dd to give him money from her bank. She always paid late, and didn't think I should charge her since I was staying home with my kids anyways. When we terminated she got mad and was yelling and screaming at us and when she backed out of my driveway she almost hit our tree and left big tire tracks in our yard. She didn't want to pay her last fees so my husband ended up having to help me tell her we would be going to small claims court if she didn't pay. When she paid she threw the money at me and now its very awkward to run into her in town. We also have a lot of friends in common and they ask why we aren't friends on Facebook anymore.
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Evansmom 07:27 AM 01-06-2014
Originally Posted by sharlan:
I haven't terminated many families in 30 years. The one I did was because the son started making some serious false accusations after I'd had the family (3 kids) for 6 years. The mom knew they were lies, but the dad believed them.

I only have had one term that was effective immediately and it was because a 3 year old child was making up things that weren't happening here too. It was awful. It was a first child to older parents and they coddled him beyond any coddling I've ever seen. Ultimately they felt guilty bringing him to daycare so they made a big deal about drop offs and if he cried he got taken to Target that day to pick out a new toy. Doesn't take long for a 3 year old to figure out that he got a toy every time he complained about daycare. So eventually he started saying he was being hit by kids here. His parents took it very seriously even though I knew absolutely that there was no hitting going on. For one I had a very small group of only 3 kids and for two the other 2 kids I'd had for 2 years and they were not hitters but very calm little girls. Besides they were never out of eyesight!

Anyway DCB started to say he was getting hit by the other kids and crying to his parents when he got home that night and then asking to go to Target! And when they questioned him about it in front of me he hid his face and wouldn't look at me! It was so obvious that he was making it up but they wouldn't see it. Of course I couldn't come out and say "Your kid is lying!!" So I had to find ways to try to diplomatically say it. Which wasn't easy.

Finally one night the DCD picked DCB up and later we found they were still parked in my driveway an hour later! Seems DCB started crying and saying a friend hit him and DCD spent an HOUR! interrogating him in the truck before coming back to my door to talk to me about it. DCD came to my door and DCB hid his head and wouldn't look at me of course. The story was someone had hit DCB and DCB wouldn't say who it was. Even though DCD tried for that hour to get DCB to say.

After they left it occurred to me that at some point DCB may decide to make up that I was hitting him and that made him a super liability that I couldn't risk so I emailed a term letter effective immediately and requested DCPs only contact me in writing from that moment on so I would have a paper trail.
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MarinaVanessa 10:18 AM 01-06-2014
My worst termination was my first client. I was new, I needed the income etc. This woman constantly pushed my policies, paid late then paid the late payment fees like it was nothing, never arrived when scheduled, picked up late, expected me to feed her DS at whatever time he got here (like at noon she'd come and say "oh he didn't have breakfast yet") and she was outright rude to me and threatened to leave to get her way. But I needed the money.

I decided to replace her with another family finally after having given my 3 families 6 months notice of my vacation and reminding them each month then every week the month before. Never heard a peek about it being an inconvenience but the day before my vacation she decides to tell me that it was a problem and that she needed "reliable" child care. Without her income we wouldn't afford our bills so I ended up staying half of my vacation the following week because she did not have child care and then drove out to meet up with my family by myself. I was willing to put up with her for the money until I could find another FT family.

The week after I came back from vacation she arrived without my payment but I was firm and told her I needed my payment. She was annoyed and said fine and I stupidly kept DCB while she went home to get the money. She came back to pay me ... 8 hours later, after her work shift. That was the last straw. I was furious with her. I terminated her as soon as she came to pick DCB up ... 15 minutes late. For months I'd hear from her on occasion asking for drop in care. I was always "full". It was like breaking up with someone that just didn't get it.
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Unregistered 10:40 AM 01-06-2014
Originally Posted by MarinaVanessa:
My worst termination was my first client. I was new, I needed the income etc. This woman constantly pushed my policies, paid late then paid the late payment fees like it was nothing, never arrived when scheduled, picked up late, expected me to feed her DS at whatever time he got here (like at noon she'd come and say "oh he didn't have breakfast yet") and she was outright rude to me and threatened to leave to get her way. But I needed the money..
Not on topic but i have a dcm that does thd same thing to me. When i get a back bone i will term her.
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