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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Thinking About Pulling The Plug.....
daycare 07:58 PM 01-22-2013
I run a preschool program from my home. I have invested alot of time in school, special programs (hand writing with tears, zoo phonics to name a few) and do a TON for my daycare families and the kids.
We go into our community at least 3 days out of the week and do a lot of really cool things.
At the start of each month I send out a monthly calendar, news letter and invoice for payment.
Well for the last several months parents are proving to me that they don't read anything that I send home or that they don't participate in anything that I do.
Over the last few months kids are showing up with the wrong clothing to participate, or sack lunch or $.
last month I made a mistake on the calendar and had to switch things around. I emailed to tell them and not one parent was aware of the change.
I know many of you would say well if they show up without the right stuff send them home, but then I would be sending them home 3 days out of the week.
like the other day, we went on our weekly hike. it has been in the 40s here in CA (which is freezing for us) and most of the kids have been sick. 3 out of 9 kids show up no jacket. One in a dress, with no socks and slipper type shoes. REALLY !!! if you read your calendar I emailed, the one I printed out and the bulletin board at my house you would have saw that we are going hiking today like we do every Wednesday.
Every single day I am dealing with this. I know my program has a lot going on. I don't expect for the parents to always be 100% on board with all that they have going on too, but it's getting to the point that I am not even sure why I am doing all of this.
OH and one day I purposely did not take the kids to the field trip to see what would be said....NOTHING. I even told them we did not go to the frog pond today, the kids were too cold. Parents say oh that was today? YUP just like it is every MONDAY......................
I know I am venting, I know the kids love these trips, but I am really drained of the noncompliance from the parents. They are told about my program when they enroll and how busy it can be at times. I know I am great at communicating with the parents and I know that I keep a consistent schedule. Maybe twice or three times do we have something occur different. Like during the month of october we visit the fire stations for fire prevention month...
Am I just feeling more than I should or would you pull the plug on all of this extra stuff too????
We go into our community at least 3 days out of the week and do a lot of really cool things.
At the start of each month I send out a monthly calendar, news letter and invoice for payment.
Well for the last several months parents are proving to me that they don't read anything that I send home or that they don't participate in anything that I do.
Over the last few months kids are showing up with the wrong clothing to participate, or sack lunch or $.
last month I made a mistake on the calendar and had to switch things around. I emailed to tell them and not one parent was aware of the change.
I know many of you would say well if they show up without the right stuff send them home, but then I would be sending them home 3 days out of the week.
like the other day, we went on our weekly hike. it has been in the 40s here in CA (which is freezing for us) and most of the kids have been sick. 3 out of 9 kids show up no jacket. One in a dress, with no socks and slipper type shoes. REALLY !!! if you read your calendar I emailed, the one I printed out and the bulletin board at my house you would have saw that we are going hiking today like we do every Wednesday.
Every single day I am dealing with this. I know my program has a lot going on. I don't expect for the parents to always be 100% on board with all that they have going on too, but it's getting to the point that I am not even sure why I am doing all of this.
OH and one day I purposely did not take the kids to the field trip to see what would be said....NOTHING. I even told them we did not go to the frog pond today, the kids were too cold. Parents say oh that was today? YUP just like it is every MONDAY......................
I know I am venting, I know the kids love these trips, but I am really drained of the noncompliance from the parents. They are told about my program when they enroll and how busy it can be at times. I know I am great at communicating with the parents and I know that I keep a consistent schedule. Maybe twice or three times do we have something occur different. Like during the month of october we visit the fire stations for fire prevention month...
Am I just feeling more than I should or would you pull the plug on all of this extra stuff too????
littlemissmuffet 08:15 PM 01-22-2013
I used to do way more field trips, and special activities but the parents always somehow ended up ruining it for the kiddos. I used to do holidays crafts and parties as well, but again, parents would never thank me or remember the theme and dress the kids accordingly, etc. I used to also do jammie days and such, but what's the point when only one kid shows up in jammies?
I stopped everything. I now strictly provide excellent basic day to day care - I focus on good play, good napping and good eating. I get paid the same and have much less work - and less stress from riduculously inept parents.
If parents don't dress kids appropriately for simple outdoor play, they're sent home for the day. Simple. I don't expect anything else from parents any more because the majority are far too wrapped up in their own world's to contribute anything extra to their children's... and it's not my job to pick up their slack.
Good luck revamping your program - you might find the change to be really great for you in many aspects.
I stopped everything. I now strictly provide excellent basic day to day care - I focus on good play, good napping and good eating. I get paid the same and have much less work - and less stress from riduculously inept parents.
If parents don't dress kids appropriately for simple outdoor play, they're sent home for the day. Simple. I don't expect anything else from parents any more because the majority are far too wrapped up in their own world's to contribute anything extra to their children's... and it's not my job to pick up their slack.
Good luck revamping your program - you might find the change to be really great for you in many aspects.
cheerfuldom 08:17 PM 01-22-2013
I wouldnt pull the plug, for the kids sake. but i would start doing less for your own sanity. perhaps you are stretching yourself too thin with all the extras and such.
if clothing is the main issue, i would invest in basic sweatpants, sweatshirts for use during daycare. change them back to their regular clothes before sending them home. you only need a couple pairs just for emergency and i know Walmart sells garanimal sweats as low as $1 a piece. to me, it would be worth it. i would also round up some sneakers. i did the same thing this year with snow clothing and most of the items i rounded up were given free from various places.....or purchased second hand and very cheaply. it was worth it to me to not have these issues with the parents.
if it is lunch and other necessities, i would make up fees for everything and add it to the next bill when parents forget and then provide the item myself for the day.
if clothing is the main issue, i would invest in basic sweatpants, sweatshirts for use during daycare. change them back to their regular clothes before sending them home. you only need a couple pairs just for emergency and i know Walmart sells garanimal sweats as low as $1 a piece. to me, it would be worth it. i would also round up some sneakers. i did the same thing this year with snow clothing and most of the items i rounded up were given free from various places.....or purchased second hand and very cheaply. it was worth it to me to not have these issues with the parents.
if it is lunch and other necessities, i would make up fees for everything and add it to the next bill when parents forget and then provide the item myself for the day.
LK5kids 04:54 AM 01-23-2013
Originally Posted by cheerfuldom:
I wouldnt pull the plug, for the kids sake. but i would start doing less for your own sanity. perhaps you are stretching yourself too thin with all the extras and such.
if clothing is the main issue, i would invest in basic sweatpants, sweatshirts for use during daycare. change them back to their regular clothes before sending them home. you only need a couple pairs just for emergency and i know Walmart sells garanimal sweats as low as $1 a piece. to me, it would be worth it. i would also round up some sneakers. i did the same thing this year with snow clothing and most of the items i rounded up were given free from various places.....or purchased second hand and very cheaply. it was worth it to me to not have these issues with the parents.
if it is lunch and other necessities, i would make up fees for everything and add it to the next bill when parents forget and then provide the item myself for the day.
I wouldnt pull the plug, for the kids sake. but i would start doing less for your own sanity. perhaps you are stretching yourself too thin with all the extras and such.
if clothing is the main issue, i would invest in basic sweatpants, sweatshirts for use during daycare. change them back to their regular clothes before sending them home. you only need a couple pairs just for emergency and i know Walmart sells garanimal sweats as low as $1 a piece. to me, it would be worth it. i would also round up some sneakers. i did the same thing this year with snow clothing and most of the items i rounded up were given free from various places.....or purchased second hand and very cheaply. it was worth it to me to not have these issues with the parents.
if it is lunch and other necessities, i would make up fees for everything and add it to the next bill when parents forget and then provide the item myself for the day.
This is what I would do too.
Also, I know this may not be a popular opinion but I feel two parentings working out of the home is really stressful and hectic.
Throw having to be a single parent or not having family in the area or a super stressful job or marital/relationship problems along with raising preschool age children and parents are fried.
I too feel parents don't read! I hope you come to a happy medium. Does it do any good to remind parents verbally at pick up time about the next day's activities? I know some of your outings are Monday so then there is weekend amnesia!
AfterSchoolMom 04:59 AM 01-23-2013
Parents were the reason that I stopped doing everything as well. I used to do birthday parties, holiday parties, all kinds of involved crafts, trips on days when school was out.... I did Christmas gifts for the kids and for the parents, and I spent a lot of money on trying to make my program special.
Having to constantly chase down my payment, argue with parents over policies, and have them cop an attitude because of little things, and never even getting a thank you for anything that I did got real old, real fast.
Now, like littlemissmuffet, I just provide basic care. Because I have SA's, I provide a snack and a place for them to do homework, and that's about it. It's a shame, but really, the parents don't care and the kids don't seem to care either.
Having to constantly chase down my payment, argue with parents over policies, and have them cop an attitude because of little things, and never even getting a thank you for anything that I did got real old, real fast.
Now, like littlemissmuffet, I just provide basic care. Because I have SA's, I provide a snack and a place for them to do homework, and that's about it. It's a shame, but really, the parents don't care and the kids don't seem to care either.
daycarediva 05:30 AM 01-23-2013
If you are going to continue, I would leave the parents out of it. Send home a newsletter/monthly calendar of activities. But that's it.
I make bagged lunches for the kids for park trips, zoo, etc.
I purchased used snowpants & boots and asked on my personal FB for donations for daycare children. I have enough for next year. I will be charging parents a $10 winter gear supply fee annually. I also got better quality (kids NEED thinsulate mittens/gloves in NY, it's -7* today, not cheap cotton).
For Spring- I am working on getting 6 little pairs of rainboots for muddy days, 6 bucket hats for summer and 6 pairs of washable water diapers. I already purchased 6 towels and 6 swimsuits VERY cheaply at consignment. I have spare clothes (enough for all of the kids) for almost every weather-related activity. Again, a $10 summer supply fee annually. I also will be supplying sunscreen.
I do have parties still. We do a jammie day, all I can do is notify the parents and then just supply pj's for the kids without them. I also do special parties still, buy small gifts for birthdays and holidays, etc. I don't do it for the parents.
If $ for the field trips is a concern, I would add it to their bill and itemize the additional charges. If they don't pay, THEN I would send them away for the day.
Honestly, only 2 families really utilize most of my program. They are more actively involved in their childrens lives. They enjoy the take home bags that correspond with our monthly theme, they use the lending library regularly, they bring the children prepared for all of the silly things we do (like Green shirts for Green day-one dcm wore green that day as well. Dcb was DELIGHTED, pj's, show & tell, etc) The rest only get out of it what they choose, and for ONE it's pulling teeth to get them to stay an extra 5 minutes to discuss their son and ALL they talk about is their own personal life. NEVER dck.
I make bagged lunches for the kids for park trips, zoo, etc.
I purchased used snowpants & boots and asked on my personal FB for donations for daycare children. I have enough for next year. I will be charging parents a $10 winter gear supply fee annually. I also got better quality (kids NEED thinsulate mittens/gloves in NY, it's -7* today, not cheap cotton).
For Spring- I am working on getting 6 little pairs of rainboots for muddy days, 6 bucket hats for summer and 6 pairs of washable water diapers. I already purchased 6 towels and 6 swimsuits VERY cheaply at consignment. I have spare clothes (enough for all of the kids) for almost every weather-related activity. Again, a $10 summer supply fee annually. I also will be supplying sunscreen.
I do have parties still. We do a jammie day, all I can do is notify the parents and then just supply pj's for the kids without them. I also do special parties still, buy small gifts for birthdays and holidays, etc. I don't do it for the parents.
If $ for the field trips is a concern, I would add it to their bill and itemize the additional charges. If they don't pay, THEN I would send them away for the day.
Honestly, only 2 families really utilize most of my program. They are more actively involved in their childrens lives. They enjoy the take home bags that correspond with our monthly theme, they use the lending library regularly, they bring the children prepared for all of the silly things we do (like Green shirts for Green day-one dcm wore green that day as well. Dcb was DELIGHTED, pj's, show & tell, etc) The rest only get out of it what they choose, and for ONE it's pulling teeth to get them to stay an extra 5 minutes to discuss their son and ALL they talk about is their own personal life. NEVER dck.
SilverSabre25 05:39 AM 01-23-2013
It sounds to me like you have families that care about the care...not the preschool.
Perhaps it's really just time to clean house and make it clear that you provide PRESCHOOL, not daycare...or phrase it as "preschool with b/a care" or something, somehow, to spin your program to attract the "right" (read: interested) people.
Or...what daycarediva suggested, and leave the parents out as much as possible.
Perhaps it's really just time to clean house and make it clear that you provide PRESCHOOL, not daycare...or phrase it as "preschool with b/a care" or something, somehow, to spin your program to attract the "right" (read: interested) people.
Or...what daycarediva suggested, and leave the parents out as much as possible.
Blackcat31 06:26 AM 01-23-2013
Originally Posted by littlemissmuffet:
I used to do way more field trips, and special activities but the parents always somehow ended up ruining it for the kiddos. I used to do holidays crafts and parties as well, but again, parents would never thank me or remember the theme and dress the kids accordingly, etc. I used to also do jammie days and such, but what's the point when only one kid shows up in jammies?
I stopped everything. I now strictly provide excellent basic day to day care - I focus on good play, good napping and good eating. I get paid the same and have much less work - and less stress from riduculously inept parents.
If parents don't dress kids appropriately for simple outdoor play, they're sent home for the day. Simple. I don't expect anything else from parents any more because the majority are far too wrapped up in their own world's to contribute anything extra to their children's... and it's not my job to pick up their slack.
Good luck revamping your program - you might find the change to be really great for you in many aspects.
+1 I used to do way more field trips, and special activities but the parents always somehow ended up ruining it for the kiddos. I used to do holidays crafts and parties as well, but again, parents would never thank me or remember the theme and dress the kids accordingly, etc. I used to also do jammie days and such, but what's the point when only one kid shows up in jammies?
I stopped everything. I now strictly provide excellent basic day to day care - I focus on good play, good napping and good eating. I get paid the same and have much less work - and less stress from riduculously inept parents.
If parents don't dress kids appropriately for simple outdoor play, they're sent home for the day. Simple. I don't expect anything else from parents any more because the majority are far too wrapped up in their own world's to contribute anything extra to their children's... and it's not my job to pick up their slack.
Good luck revamping your program - you might find the change to be really great for you in many aspects.
You took the words right out of my mouth.I do still plan a few fun activities each month but when I do, it is for the kids and the parents aren't expected to contribute or care. I do it for the kids.
countrymom 06:28 AM 01-23-2013
Originally Posted by littlemissmuffet:
I used to do way more field trips, and special activities but the parents always somehow ended up ruining it for the kiddos. I used to do holidays crafts and parties as well, but again, parents would never thank me or remember the theme and dress the kids accordingly, etc. I used to also do jammie days and such, but what's the point when only one kid shows up in jammies?
I stopped everything. I now strictly provide excellent basic day to day care - I focus on good play, good napping and good eating. I get paid the same and have much less work - and less stress from riduculously inept parents.
If parents don't dress kids appropriately for simple outdoor play, they're sent home for the day. Simple. I don't expect anything else from parents any more because the majority are far too wrapped up in their own world's to contribute anything extra to their children's... and it's not my job to pick up their slack.
Good luck revamping your program - you might find the change to be really great for you in many aspects.
this is what I do nowI used to do way more field trips, and special activities but the parents always somehow ended up ruining it for the kiddos. I used to do holidays crafts and parties as well, but again, parents would never thank me or remember the theme and dress the kids accordingly, etc. I used to also do jammie days and such, but what's the point when only one kid shows up in jammies?
I stopped everything. I now strictly provide excellent basic day to day care - I focus on good play, good napping and good eating. I get paid the same and have much less work - and less stress from riduculously inept parents.
If parents don't dress kids appropriately for simple outdoor play, they're sent home for the day. Simple. I don't expect anything else from parents any more because the majority are far too wrapped up in their own world's to contribute anything extra to their children's... and it's not my job to pick up their slack.
Good luck revamping your program - you might find the change to be really great for you in many aspects.
also if you want to continue with your program, leave the parents out of it. Also, I don't mind having extra clothes but if I keep suppling the stuff parents will never learn, so I take the kids out as they are dressed and then I tell parents at pick up time.
My3cents 07:33 AM 01-23-2013
Originally Posted by countrymom:
this is what I do now
also if you want to continue with your program, leave the parents out of it. Also, I don't mind having extra clothes but if I keep suppling the stuff parents will never learn, so I take the kids out as they are dressed and then I tell parents at pick up time.
I don't agree with this- Why should a child have to suffer because the parent is ignorant to the request. I know better. I either provide it or have the parent bring it.this is what I do now
also if you want to continue with your program, leave the parents out of it. Also, I don't mind having extra clothes but if I keep suppling the stuff parents will never learn, so I take the kids out as they are dressed and then I tell parents at pick up time.
continuing on with this discussion, I feel do it because you want to do it and can or don't do it at all. I would put a big bold sign on the door reminding parents of what you need for the following day- maybe text if that is your thing to remind- ask them in the morning if they have the items if not to go back home and get them, because if everyone doesn't have what is needed we can't do the activity. If they argue with you explain you run a preschool program and it is a high parental involvement to keep the preschool running properly. If parents continue to not listen or want this for their child you will have to make changes. 1) you can either provide everything needed by having a stock of extras, and provide lunches and maybe add a fee to all of this 2) stop doing it all- but you have to ask yourself are you doing it for the kids, and are you doing it for yourself to make the day nicer for the children. One more idea is to send out an urgent letter to all the parents explaining your issues in a clear not singling out anyone form. 3) you can term those that can't get it together and follow the rules and just want basic care,explaining you offer more then just basic care because your a preschool. Weigh it all out and decide where you want to go with all of this and how you want your program to run.
I don't do field trips. I think some of these first things should be done with parents and then when they go into Kindergarten they will do a few field trips. I don't want the liability. But.... I do a ton of fun things here at daycare above and beyond probably what most basic care places do. I do preschool program.
I guess I would make this a big conversation with each parent at pick up and also hand them a letter and ask them to read it. Good luck-
Frustrating- Parents just figure they are paying for a service that provides everything these days. They don't think, they are busy with getting to work and getting a toddler out the door. No excuse, but it is reality. They are thinking about the demands of the job that awaits them. Many parents don't have the juggle act down, they have the get through the minute, hour, day act down. Again no excuse. If your providing a program that expects more out of parents, stand up for yourself over and over again until they get it. Might have to adopt the attitude of in your face, and not backing down attitude. I wish you luck-
Crystal 07:42 AM 01-23-2013
Posts like these REALLY make me appreciate my families. I cannot imagine living with that level of disrespect on a daily basis.
I recommend making it daycare only, OR ENFORCING STRICT POLICIES.....you come unprepared for our field trip, you get sent home and don't get to attend for the day. OR.....poll the parents....they may not even want the extras, and if that is the case, I would stop doing the field trips. I will say it sounds like you do to much and the parents have probably tired of it.
I recommend making it daycare only, OR ENFORCING STRICT POLICIES.....you come unprepared for our field trip, you get sent home and don't get to attend for the day. OR.....poll the parents....they may not even want the extras, and if that is the case, I would stop doing the field trips. I will say it sounds like you do to much and the parents have probably tired of it.
daycare 08:36 AM 01-23-2013
well here is the thing... ALL parents have a full understanding of my program prior to enrollment.
I have created a program called community in the classroom, where I have teamed up with members of our community to lead us in lessons. Since we have a lot of trails and lakes near us, a lot of what we do revolves around nature.
All of the parents know what is required of them to have their child participate. The thing is, is that they know 1 month ahead of time what we will be doing.
I have one mom that gets the calendar on Friday and on Monday brings EVERYTHING her child will need and leaves it in his cubby. Everything but lunch that is.
All of these parents are wonderful people. All pay on time, drop and pick up on time and for the most part, I could not ask for nicer people.
Just trying to find the light at the end of the tunnel of the issues I have been having of the parents not doing their part for us to participate in our lessons.
I do have a ton of clothing on hand, often does not get returned and I have to buy more. I try to change before parents arrive, but I can't always forecast those early pick ups.
I think what I might do is what someone suggested here is to charge fees for the items they don't have. No lunch $5.00, no jacket $10.00 until returned.
I love my program, I love having the community help to guide our youth.
I don't want to change it, the families were doing well, but maybe they do need a break.
Also, as part of my program, I prepare not only the kids for school, but the parents. Most of my kids are 3.5 to age 5
I have created a program called community in the classroom, where I have teamed up with members of our community to lead us in lessons. Since we have a lot of trails and lakes near us, a lot of what we do revolves around nature.
All of the parents know what is required of them to have their child participate. The thing is, is that they know 1 month ahead of time what we will be doing.
I have one mom that gets the calendar on Friday and on Monday brings EVERYTHING her child will need and leaves it in his cubby. Everything but lunch that is.
All of these parents are wonderful people. All pay on time, drop and pick up on time and for the most part, I could not ask for nicer people.
Just trying to find the light at the end of the tunnel of the issues I have been having of the parents not doing their part for us to participate in our lessons.
I do have a ton of clothing on hand, often does not get returned and I have to buy more. I try to change before parents arrive, but I can't always forecast those early pick ups.
I think what I might do is what someone suggested here is to charge fees for the items they don't have. No lunch $5.00, no jacket $10.00 until returned.
I love my program, I love having the community help to guide our youth.
I don't want to change it, the families were doing well, but maybe they do need a break.
Also, as part of my program, I prepare not only the kids for school, but the parents. Most of my kids are 3.5 to age 5
Blackcat31 08:40 AM 01-23-2013
Originally Posted by daycare:
well here is the thing... ALL parents have a full understanding of my program prior to enrollment.
I have created a program called community in the classroom, where I have teamed up with members of our community to lead us in lessons. Since we have a lot of trails and lakes near us, a lot of what we do revolves around nature.
All of the parents know what is required of them to have their child participate. The thing is, is that they know 1 month ahead of time what we will be doing.
I have one mom that gets the calendar on Friday and on Monday brings EVERYTHING her child will need and leaves it in his cubby. Everything but lunch that is.
All of these parents are wonderful people. All pay on time, drop and pick up on time and for the most part, I could not ask for nicer people.
Just trying to find the light at the end of the tunnel of the issues I have been having of the parents not doing their part for us to participate in our lessons.
I do have a ton of clothing on hand, often does not get returned and I have to buy more. I try to change before parents arrive, but I can't always forecast those early pick ups.
I think what I might do is what someone suggested here is to charge fees for the items they don't have. No lunch $5.00, no jacket $10.00 until returned.
I love my program, I love having the community help to guide our youth.
I don't want to change it, the families were doing well, but maybe they do need a break.
Also, as part of my program, I prepare not only the kids for school, but the parents. Most of my kids are 3.5 to age 5
Hun, you KNOW I don't mean this rudely or in a mean way but if ALL your parents know your rules and policies and are still not abiding by them, then the only other person that could be at fault is YOU. well here is the thing... ALL parents have a full understanding of my program prior to enrollment.
I have created a program called community in the classroom, where I have teamed up with members of our community to lead us in lessons. Since we have a lot of trails and lakes near us, a lot of what we do revolves around nature.
All of the parents know what is required of them to have their child participate. The thing is, is that they know 1 month ahead of time what we will be doing.
I have one mom that gets the calendar on Friday and on Monday brings EVERYTHING her child will need and leaves it in his cubby. Everything but lunch that is.
All of these parents are wonderful people. All pay on time, drop and pick up on time and for the most part, I could not ask for nicer people.
Just trying to find the light at the end of the tunnel of the issues I have been having of the parents not doing their part for us to participate in our lessons.
I do have a ton of clothing on hand, often does not get returned and I have to buy more. I try to change before parents arrive, but I can't always forecast those early pick ups.
I think what I might do is what someone suggested here is to charge fees for the items they don't have. No lunch $5.00, no jacket $10.00 until returned.
I love my program, I love having the community help to guide our youth.
I don't want to change it, the families were doing well, but maybe they do need a break.
Also, as part of my program, I prepare not only the kids for school, but the parents. Most of my kids are 3.5 to age 5
If you aren't enforcing your policies and rules, that isn't on the parents then, it's on you.
If they arrive unprepared IN ANY WAY (and you require them to be) turn them away at the door.
Do NOT accept them into care for the day unless they are abiding by the rules and policies they are all informed of and agreed to upon enrollment.
daycare 09:02 AM 01-23-2013
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
Hun, you KNOW I don't mean this rudely or in a mean way but if ALL your parents know your rules and policies and are still not abiding by them, then the only other person that could be at fault is YOU.
If you aren't enforcing your policies and rules, that isn't on the parents then, it's on you.
If they arrive unprepared IN ANY WAY (and you require them to be) turn them away at the door.
Do NOT accept them into care for the day unless they are abiding by the rules and policies they are all informed of and agreed to upon enrollment.
the thing is that I have. I have turned people away to go get proper shoes or lunches or whatever is needed. THEN it throws a wrench into our day because now the parents are coming back during class time and I am having to stop what I am doing or my assistant has to go and open the door which is a major distraction to our morning lesson. Hun, you KNOW I don't mean this rudely or in a mean way but if ALL your parents know your rules and policies and are still not abiding by them, then the only other person that could be at fault is YOU.
If you aren't enforcing your policies and rules, that isn't on the parents then, it's on you.
If they arrive unprepared IN ANY WAY (and you require them to be) turn them away at the door.
Do NOT accept them into care for the day unless they are abiding by the rules and policies they are all informed of and agreed to upon enrollment.
I have 4 or 5 parents coming to the door at different times.... So turning them away does get the items needed for the day, it's just now we have to deal with the distractions..... Which always end up bad..
I think I will still go the route of ifyou don't have it, I will add it to your bill...
Blackcat31 09:03 AM 01-23-2013
I meant turn them away. period.
No returning that day.
Guaranteed, it will only happen once.
No returning that day.
Guaranteed, it will only happen once.
daycare 09:04 AM 01-23-2013
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
I meant turn them away. period.
No returning that day.
Guaranteed, it will only happen once.
if I did that these people would pull their kids I am sure.......I meant turn them away. period.
No returning that day.
Guaranteed, it will only happen once.
Country Kids 09:11 AM 01-23-2013
I also let my parents know that I'm the training ground for school. If they can't get it down for me how will they do it for school. It seriously makes them do some thinking.
Your child won't get up in the morning and your late for school-believe me the school won't care. Your child is either there daily or there will be consequences.
Your child forgot lunch or has no money-pb sandwich and maybe an apple. Either you pack the lunch or put money on the account.
Your child has no school supplies-the school will do the best they can but will probably be left overs from last year.
The school won't hold the parents hands so why should we? The child in the end will suffer but with people like us and teachers who shell tons of money out of their own pockets we make it happen. We care and want to see these children succeed. Not saying the parents don't but I have 6 people that I have to make sure are up and ready each and every morning. I have to make sure everyone grabs their lunches, has money for things, supplies for projects, homework done, etc. Then I have 12 other children I care for every day-breakfast to make, lunch to make, snacks, supplies for preschool projects, clean blankets, clothes in cubbies, the list goes on! If I can do this for 18 people can the parents do it for 3 or 4?
Your child won't get up in the morning and your late for school-believe me the school won't care. Your child is either there daily or there will be consequences.
Your child forgot lunch or has no money-pb sandwich and maybe an apple. Either you pack the lunch or put money on the account.
Your child has no school supplies-the school will do the best they can but will probably be left overs from last year.
The school won't hold the parents hands so why should we? The child in the end will suffer but with people like us and teachers who shell tons of money out of their own pockets we make it happen. We care and want to see these children succeed. Not saying the parents don't but I have 6 people that I have to make sure are up and ready each and every morning. I have to make sure everyone grabs their lunches, has money for things, supplies for projects, homework done, etc. Then I have 12 other children I care for every day-breakfast to make, lunch to make, snacks, supplies for preschool projects, clean blankets, clothes in cubbies, the list goes on! If I can do this for 18 people can the parents do it for 3 or 4?
Blackcat31 09:15 AM 01-23-2013
Originally Posted by daycare:
if I did that these people would pull their kids I am sure.......
...then get some new ones. if I did that these people would pull their kids I am sure.......
I really am not understanding why parents would take the time to research and find a program like yours, agree to the policies and things you are asking of them and then not comply?!?!
Plus, if that is how it is, I would pull the plug then.
Offer what YOU want and not what the parents want.
You must live in a Brumuda Triangle type area....as your parents confuse me to no end
Never in a million years would I put my neck out there to offer such high quality program and enroll parents who don't hold up their end of the deal.
That means their child is YOUR priority and not theirs
Girl...you have me stumped more than anyone on this board
daycare 09:26 AM 01-23-2013
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
...then get some new ones.
I really am not understanding why parents would take the time to research and find a program like yours, agree to the policies and things you are asking of them and then not comply?!?!
Plus, if that is how it is, I would pull the plug then.
Offer what YOU want and not what the parents want.
You must live in a Brumuda Triangle type area....as your parents confuse me to no end
Never in a million years would I put my neck out there to offer such high quality program and enroll parents who don't hold up their end of the deal.
That means their child is YOUR priority and not theirs
Girl...you have me stumped more than anyone on this board
i guess unless you lived in the type of area that I live in, it would be hard to understand the type of people that live in my area....then get some new ones.
I really am not understanding why parents would take the time to research and find a program like yours, agree to the policies and things you are asking of them and then not comply?!?!
Plus, if that is how it is, I would pull the plug then.
Offer what YOU want and not what the parents want.
You must live in a Brumuda Triangle type area....as your parents confuse me to no end
Never in a million years would I put my neck out there to offer such high quality program and enroll parents who don't hold up their end of the deal.
That means their child is YOUR priority and not theirs
Girl...you have me stumped more than anyone on this board
not saying that they are all like this, but most of them have a ton of money with very high demands, which makes it hard to run a sucessful business and be able to meet the WANTS of everyone. I wish I could say go home for the day, but then I would be sending home more than half of my class.
Our schools here would not send kids home for the day if they forgot something, but they do have a front office that could handle the munch drop off so that the classroom does not get interrupted. I dont have that luxury...
My3cents 09:35 AM 01-23-2013
Originally Posted by daycare:
well here is the thing... ALL parents have a full understanding of my program prior to enrollment.
I have created a program called community in the classroom, where I have teamed up with members of our community to lead us in lessons. Since we have a lot of trails and lakes near us, a lot of what we do revolves around nature.
All of the parents know what is required of them to have their child participate. The thing is, is that they know 1 month ahead of time what we will be doing.
I have one mom that gets the calendar on Friday and on Monday brings EVERYTHING her child will need and leaves it in his cubby. Everything but lunch that is.
All of these parents are wonderful people. All pay on time, drop and pick up on time and for the most part, I could not ask for nicer people.
Just trying to find the light at the end of the tunnel of the issues I have been having of the parents not doing their part for us to participate in our lessons.
I do have a ton of clothing on hand, often does not get returned and I have to buy more. I try to change before parents arrive, but I can't always forecast those early pick ups.
I think what I might do is what someone suggested here is to charge fees for the items they don't have. No lunch $5.00, no jacket $10.00 until returned.
I love my program, I love having the community help to guide our youth.
I don't want to change it, the families were doing well, but maybe they do need a break.
Also, as part of my program, I prepare not only the kids for school, but the parents. Most of my kids are 3.5 to age 5
See when I read this, I thought you had a love for what your doing. Make it happen on your end of things. well here is the thing... ALL parents have a full understanding of my program prior to enrollment.
I have created a program called community in the classroom, where I have teamed up with members of our community to lead us in lessons. Since we have a lot of trails and lakes near us, a lot of what we do revolves around nature.
All of the parents know what is required of them to have their child participate. The thing is, is that they know 1 month ahead of time what we will be doing.
I have one mom that gets the calendar on Friday and on Monday brings EVERYTHING her child will need and leaves it in his cubby. Everything but lunch that is.
All of these parents are wonderful people. All pay on time, drop and pick up on time and for the most part, I could not ask for nicer people.
Just trying to find the light at the end of the tunnel of the issues I have been having of the parents not doing their part for us to participate in our lessons.
I do have a ton of clothing on hand, often does not get returned and I have to buy more. I try to change before parents arrive, but I can't always forecast those early pick ups.
I think what I might do is what someone suggested here is to charge fees for the items they don't have. No lunch $5.00, no jacket $10.00 until returned.
I love my program, I love having the community help to guide our youth.
I don't want to change it, the families were doing well, but maybe they do need a break.
Also, as part of my program, I prepare not only the kids for school, but the parents. Most of my kids are 3.5 to age 5
If you don't have time to change a child, ask the parent to do it at the end of the day. Just tell them Marge, Johnny is wearing my clothes because he didn't come in with what was needed today, could you just change him back into his clothes and leave mine on the table so I have it for next time.
The lunch problem is simple, get on the food program and pack the lunches yourself. Charge a bit more for serving lunch- Simple solve.
If you enjoy doing this with your kids and the kids love it, I would continue and just get stricter about your policies and what is needed. When a child comes in for the morning ask if they have this, that and those and if the parent says no, tell them then and there, well I hate to not have everyone be able to join in today on our trip you will have to get those things to me as soon as you can so we can proceed with our day or keep little love one home today.
It sounds like the parents picked you for a provider because of your program, now keeping to the parents end of things just has to be enforced.
I would send a letter out to all and ask each parent to read it and I would put that letter taped on my door so it in the face and at eye level. The letter would explain your frustrations and needs and make it blunt that for now on if you don't come prepared for the outing of the day you will be called and asked to pick your child up so this does not ruin the outing for everyone. I would offer up solutions as to how to help the parents be more on board, by suggesting all needed items except for lunch be brought in on Mondays. I would also not schedule an outing on Monday so that gives you Monday to remind everyone verbally that on Tuesday we will be going to the frog pond with so and so and we will need such and such.
The parents sound lazy in their ways not tired of your program.
Good luck and thanks for sharing-
My3cents 09:40 AM 01-23-2013
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
Hun, you KNOW I don't mean this rudely or in a mean way but if ALL your parents know your rules and policies and are still not abiding by them, then the only other person that could be at fault is YOU.
If you aren't enforcing your policies and rules, that isn't on the parents then, it's on you.
If they arrive unprepared IN ANY WAY (and you require them to be) turn them away at the door.
Do NOT accept them into care for the day unless they are abiding by the rules and policies they are all informed of and agreed to upon enrollment.
I agree with this also- The more I think about this. I don't think it is your program, I think it is laxed parents. They need to be accountable to your rules and policies- It is one thing to help someone out that you know truly needs it but when a need becomes a crutch it is then time to make changes and say whooooa this is not working for me. Hun, you KNOW I don't mean this rudely or in a mean way but if ALL your parents know your rules and policies and are still not abiding by them, then the only other person that could be at fault is YOU.
If you aren't enforcing your policies and rules, that isn't on the parents then, it's on you.
If they arrive unprepared IN ANY WAY (and you require them to be) turn them away at the door.
Do NOT accept them into care for the day unless they are abiding by the rules and policies they are all informed of and agreed to upon enrollment.
Good luck- Let us all know what you decide and how it works out for you-
My3cents 09:43 AM 01-23-2013
Originally Posted by daycare:
the thing is that I have. I have turned people away to go get proper shoes or lunches or whatever is needed. THEN it throws a wrench into our day because now the parents are coming back during class time and I am having to stop what I am doing or my assistant has to go and open the door which is a major distraction to our morning lesson.
I have 4 or 5 parents coming to the door at different times.... So turning them away does get the items needed for the day, it's just now we have to deal with the distractions..... Which always end up bad..
I think I will still go the route of ifyou don't have it, I will add it to your bill...
no, tell them please bring in the item leave it and quietly go. I will not have time to gab with you and I don't want this to be a distraction to what we are doing at the time- After this happens twice or three times at the most tell the parents I am not going to ask you to bring the item in I am going to ask you take your little one home for the day. I can't keep having the distractions happen. That will get the parents attention-the thing is that I have. I have turned people away to go get proper shoes or lunches or whatever is needed. THEN it throws a wrench into our day because now the parents are coming back during class time and I am having to stop what I am doing or my assistant has to go and open the door which is a major distraction to our morning lesson.
I have 4 or 5 parents coming to the door at different times.... So turning them away does get the items needed for the day, it's just now we have to deal with the distractions..... Which always end up bad..
I think I will still go the route of ifyou don't have it, I will add it to your bill...
daycarediva 09:47 AM 01-23-2013
Originally Posted by Country Kids:
I also let my parents know that I'm the training ground for school. If they can't get it down for me how will they do it for school. It seriously makes them do some thinking.
Your child won't get up in the morning and your late for preschool-believe me the school won't care. Your child is either there daily or there will be consequences.
Your child forgot lunch or has no money-pb sandwich and maybe an apple. Either you pack the lunch or put money on the account.
Your child has no school supplies-the school will do the best they can but will probably be left overs from last year.
The school won't hold the parents hands so why should we? The child in the end will suffer but with people like us and teachers who shell tons of money out of their own pockets we make it happen. We care and want to see these children succeed. Not saying the parents don't but I have 6 people that I have to make sure are up and ready each and every morning. I have to make sure everyone grabs their lunches, has money for things, supplies for projects, homework done, etc. Then I have 12 other children I care for every day-breakfast to make, lunch to make, snacks, supplies for preschool projects, clean blankets, clothes in cubbies, the list goes on! If I can do this for 18 people can the parents do it for 3 or 4?
*clapping*I also let my parents know that I'm the training ground for school. If they can't get it down for me how will they do it for school. It seriously makes them do some thinking.
Your child won't get up in the morning and your late for preschool-believe me the school won't care. Your child is either there daily or there will be consequences.
Your child forgot lunch or has no money-pb sandwich and maybe an apple. Either you pack the lunch or put money on the account.
Your child has no school supplies-the school will do the best they can but will probably be left overs from last year.
The school won't hold the parents hands so why should we? The child in the end will suffer but with people like us and teachers who shell tons of money out of their own pockets we make it happen. We care and want to see these children succeed. Not saying the parents don't but I have 6 people that I have to make sure are up and ready each and every morning. I have to make sure everyone grabs their lunches, has money for things, supplies for projects, homework done, etc. Then I have 12 other children I care for every day-breakfast to make, lunch to make, snacks, supplies for preschool projects, clean blankets, clothes in cubbies, the list goes on! If I can do this for 18 people can the parents do it for 3 or 4?
I am always at a loss when parents say they didn't have time. Um, I have 4 children, in bachelors degree classes, take additional classes for state requirements, work 60+ hours a week, etc etc etc.....
Just this morning I got "We didn't have time for breakfast or to change so can you give him a little something now, here are his clothes.?" No. Breakfast is earlier than your drop off. Hand back clothes, you can change him. Get up earlier and plan for your day.
My3cents 09:53 AM 01-23-2013
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
...then get some new ones.
I really am not understanding why parents would take the time to research and find a program like yours, agree to the policies and things you are asking of them and then not comply?!?!
Plus, if that is how it is, I would pull the plug then.
Offer what YOU want and not what the parents want.
You must live in a Brumuda Triangle type area....as your parents confuse me to no end
Never in a million years would I put my neck out there to offer such high quality program and enroll parents who don't hold up their end of the deal.
That means their child is YOUR priority and not theirs
Girl...you have me stumped more than anyone on this board
Not ganging up on you- I have a mind of my own. ...then get some new ones.
I really am not understanding why parents would take the time to research and find a program like yours, agree to the policies and things you are asking of them and then not comply?!?!
Plus, if that is how it is, I would pull the plug then.
Offer what YOU want and not what the parents want.
You must live in a Brumuda Triangle type area....as your parents confuse me to no end
Never in a million years would I put my neck out there to offer such high quality program and enroll parents who don't hold up their end of the deal.
That means their child is YOUR priority and not theirs
Girl...you have me stumped more than anyone on this board
but...... I have to agree.
Finding a daycare that a parent likes can be work. If they are using the program that you described it sounds like it is a lot of work to get into your program. The hardest part of doing daycare (I struggle with this too) is having backbone to carry out the rules you have decided are going to work for you. If you don't carry them out, then what is the point of having them in the first place?
Nicely tell your parents how it is going to be from now on and move on. If they don't comply can them and find clients that care enough to follow through with what you ask. I have a soft spot for people, but I also have a line that can't crossed. Like I said it is one thing to help someone, it is another to be a crutch all the time- It is ok, to say enough is enough, we need to regroup and do things right again. Big sign on your door, for now on if you don't bring in what is needed for the day your child will be turned away and not able to participate in the program for that day!!! My Policies have become over relaxed these days and need to be enforced as of NOW- Thank you and I appreciate everyones cooperation in this matter.
Blackcat31 09:53 AM 01-23-2013
Originally Posted by daycare:
i guess unless you lived in the type of area that I live in, it would be hard to understand the type of people that live in my area.
not saying that they are all like this, but most of them have a ton of money with very high demands, which makes it hard to run a sucessful business and be able to meet the WANTS of everyone. I wish I could say go home for the day, but then I would be sending home more than half of my class.
Our schools here would not send kids home for the day if they forgot something, but they do have a front office that could handle the munch drop off so that the classroom does not get interrupted. I dont have that luxury...
I am not understanding how these parents are having these high demands but yet don't see how they have a responsibility in making sure those demands are met. i guess unless you lived in the type of area that I live in, it would be hard to understand the type of people that live in my area.
not saying that they are all like this, but most of them have a ton of money with very high demands, which makes it hard to run a sucessful business and be able to meet the WANTS of everyone. I wish I could say go home for the day, but then I would be sending home more than half of my class.
Our schools here would not send kids home for the day if they forgot something, but they do have a front office that could handle the munch drop off so that the classroom does not get interrupted. I dont have that luxury...
You aren't hired help. You aren't their personal nanny.
For them to "demand" specific things for a child care program and then not do their part is utterly rediculous.
I also don't think it has anything to do with money. I've worked with plenty of parents with money and they still do their part as parents.
Maybe that should be your minimal requirement when interviewing from now on......pass on any parent who doesn't see that they have a personal responsibility to make sure their child is given their attention as a priority.
Sorry you are dealing with this. Parents definitely have a way of making this job much harder than it needs to be.
daycare 09:54 AM 01-23-2013
thanks so much..... and thank you all for the advice....
thinking about everything eveyone has said, I do think that the parents have gotten laxed. We just got done with having a lot of time off from the holiays, then when everyone came back kids were all sick. some days I only had two kids in care. This would really be the first week where things were some what normal. No days off and no kids out sick.
I think that me speaking up and brining everyone back on board is what needs to happen.
thinking about everything eveyone has said, I do think that the parents have gotten laxed. We just got done with having a lot of time off from the holiays, then when everyone came back kids were all sick. some days I only had two kids in care. This would really be the first week where things were some what normal. No days off and no kids out sick.
I think that me speaking up and brining everyone back on board is what needs to happen.
My3cents 10:02 AM 01-23-2013
Originally Posted by daycare:
i guess unless you lived in the type of area that I live in, it would be hard to understand the type of people that live in my area.
not saying that they are all like this, but most of them have a ton of money with very high demands, which makes it hard to run a sucessful business and be able to meet the WANTS of everyone. I wish I could say go home for the day, but then I would be sending home more than half of my class.
Our schools here would not send kids home for the day if they forgot something, but they do have a front office that could handle the munch drop off so that the classroom does not get interrupted. I dont have that luxury...
Exactly so that is how you present this issue to your parents. OR- charge more and get some help to keep the ones that don't comply to your rules. It sounds like the parents can afford this. Your house, your program your rules, it is up to you to enforce if you want to continue with your program. Seems like you love your program so I would enforce my rules. All that you do and offer you must have a waiting list a mile high to get into, esp the area your living in. Run with it. Your in charge- make it work.i guess unless you lived in the type of area that I live in, it would be hard to understand the type of people that live in my area.
not saying that they are all like this, but most of them have a ton of money with very high demands, which makes it hard to run a sucessful business and be able to meet the WANTS of everyone. I wish I could say go home for the day, but then I would be sending home more than half of my class.
Our schools here would not send kids home for the day if they forgot something, but they do have a front office that could handle the munch drop off so that the classroom does not get interrupted. I dont have that luxury...
daycare 10:08 AM 01-23-2013
Originally Posted by Country Kids:
I also let my parents know that I'm the training ground for school. If they can't get it down for me how will they do it for school. It seriously makes them do some thinking.
Your child won't get up in the morning and your late for preschool-believe me the school won't care. Your child is either there daily or there will be consequences.
Your child forgot lunch or has no money-pb sandwich and maybe an apple. Either you pack the lunch or put money on the account.
Your child has no school supplies-the school will do the best they can but will probably be left overs from last year.
The school won't hold the parents hands so why should we? The child in the end will suffer but with people like us and teachers who shell tons of money out of their own pockets we make it happen. We care and want to see these children succeed. Not saying the parents don't but I have 6 people that I have to make sure are up and ready each and every morning. I have to make sure everyone grabs their lunches, has money for things, supplies for projects, homework done, etc. Then I have 12 other children I care for every day-breakfast to make, lunch to make, snacks, supplies for preschool projects, clean blankets, clothes in cubbies, the list goes on! If I can do this for 18 people can the parents do it for 3 or 4?
i soooo agree with you...I also let my parents know that I'm the training ground for school. If they can't get it down for me how will they do it for school. It seriously makes them do some thinking.
Your child won't get up in the morning and your late for preschool-believe me the school won't care. Your child is either there daily or there will be consequences.
Your child forgot lunch or has no money-pb sandwich and maybe an apple. Either you pack the lunch or put money on the account.
Your child has no school supplies-the school will do the best they can but will probably be left overs from last year.
The school won't hold the parents hands so why should we? The child in the end will suffer but with people like us and teachers who shell tons of money out of their own pockets we make it happen. We care and want to see these children succeed. Not saying the parents don't but I have 6 people that I have to make sure are up and ready each and every morning. I have to make sure everyone grabs their lunches, has money for things, supplies for projects, homework done, etc. Then I have 12 other children I care for every day-breakfast to make, lunch to make, snacks, supplies for preschool projects, clean blankets, clothes in cubbies, the list goes on! If I can do this for 18 people can the parents do it for 3 or 4?
I am also a parent. I chose to become a parent at a very young age. Instant mom over night. I know what it is like having to live the daily grind. I was once also a single mother of two kids. I know how busy days get, chaos or things happen out of our control.
BUT I don't care who you are or where you are, if you don't have a plan of action and think that you can live life flying by the seat of your pants, well you are not going to have a very decent life.
We all know that if we have no plan for our day and just let the kids run the house, we would all quit our job in no time flat. We have rules, polices and plans in tact each and every day so that our days run smoothly.
Like country said, If I can do this for my own 3 children and 12 others, plus deal with all of the other daily drama life brings a family then there is NO reason why these families can't either. THEY ARE GIVEN a month.... I gave them the plan for the month, it's up to them how they are going to set their nights and mornings to determine if they are going to be sucessful or not with their day.
Of course many of you may say that I can't tell the parents what to do or that I am in a make believe world to think that the parents will do this. BUT guess what, once a child hits kinder, they have no CHOICE. again like I said before, I don't expect 100% from these families, heck I forget stuff all the time, we are all human and make mistakes, but what I am asking these families to do is simple.
and as nannyde has said in the past. you won't get their attention until you attach money to it.... Guess I need to give this a shot........
daycare 10:12 AM 01-23-2013
Originally Posted by My3cents:
Exactly so that is how you present this issue to your parents. OR- charge more and get some help to keep the ones that don't comply to your rules. It sounds like the parents can afford this. Your house, your program your rules, it is up to you to enforce if you want to continue with your program. Seems like you love your program so I would enforce my rules. All that you do and offer you must have a waiting list a mile high to get into, esp the area your living in. Run with it. Your in charge- make it work.
i used to have a mile high wait list,but with so many stay at home moms in the area and a million day programs my list has been vanished over time and now its hard to get kids in the door.Exactly so that is how you present this issue to your parents. OR- charge more and get some help to keep the ones that don't comply to your rules. It sounds like the parents can afford this. Your house, your program your rules, it is up to you to enforce if you want to continue with your program. Seems like you love your program so I would enforce my rules. All that you do and offer you must have a waiting list a mile high to get into, esp the area your living in. Run with it. Your in charge- make it work.
The ones that have called all want a half day program, which does not really work out too well for me, because if we have an outting, then I can't promise we will be back on time.....
My3cents 10:13 AM 01-23-2013
Originally Posted by daycarediva:
*clapping*
I am always at a loss when parents say they didn't have time. Um, I have 4 children, in bachelors degree classes, take additional classes for state requirements, work 60+ hours a week, etc etc etc.....
Just this morning I got "We didn't have time for breakfast or to change so can you give him a little something now, here are his clothes.?" No. Breakfast is earlier than your drop off. Hand back clothes, you can change him. Get up earlier and plan for your day.
I am at a loss too, and then I rethink and come off my horse and say to myself- Everyone else is not me or what and how I do things. If I can help someone else out, great. Again it is one thing to help out it is another to be used. I have changed a child out of pj's and into clothes but it was for a Mom who truly needed the help and does not ask this of me all the time. She is a good Mom that does for her child. Big difference. If it became an everyday, every week thing. I would have a talkie talk to her, and just say hey this is not working for me. Even if I was not doing one thing when she came through that door in the morning. Right now I have great wonderful parents. It has not always been this way so I have seen both sides of the fence here. Everyone has feelings and stories so handling them with care is a big way of showing how you care but still getting your point across and not being taken advantage of. Providers all have limits of what we want to work in our daycares, finding the balance is key so that resentments are not built up between provider and client. Anywhoooooo jumping off of this conversation and hoping for the best for you OP*clapping*
I am always at a loss when parents say they didn't have time. Um, I have 4 children, in bachelors degree classes, take additional classes for state requirements, work 60+ hours a week, etc etc etc.....
Just this morning I got "We didn't have time for breakfast or to change so can you give him a little something now, here are his clothes.?" No. Breakfast is earlier than your drop off. Hand back clothes, you can change him. Get up earlier and plan for your day.
Blackcat31 10:18 AM 01-23-2013
Originally Posted by daycare:
and as nannyde has said in the past. you won't get their attention until you attach money to it.... Guess I need to give this a shot........
That ONLY works if the money means anything to the parents. and as nannyde has said in the past. you won't get their attention until you attach money to it.... Guess I need to give this a shot........
If your DCP's are well off and don't care about cost, then attaching a fee to things isn't going to teach them anything and it surely won't detour them from behaving a certain way.
You will just find yourself with more spending money and parents who still don't abide by your policies.
daycare 10:24 AM 01-23-2013
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
That ONLY works if the money means anything to the parents.
If your DCP's are well off and don't care about cost, then attaching a fee to things isn't going to teach them anything and it surely won't detour them from behaving a certain way.
You will just find yourself with more spending money and parents who still don't abide by your policies.
very true for some of these parents, but most of my parents are very put off by fees. That ONLY works if the money means anything to the parents.
If your DCP's are well off and don't care about cost, then attaching a fee to things isn't going to teach them anything and it surely won't detour them from behaving a certain way.
You will just find yourself with more spending money and parents who still don't abide by your policies.
See one thing about the area I live in is that it is very and I mean VERY superficial.
These moms rather have more money for their botox than give to me. Trust me I have been told these exact words.
You know those shows "house wives of xyz" well imagine one of them being your DCP.......that is what I deal with daily
My3cents 10:28 AM 01-23-2013
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
I am not understanding how these parents are having these high demands but yet don't see how they have a responsibility in making sure those demands are met.
You aren't hired help. You aren't their personal nanny.
For them to "demand" specific things for a child care program and then not do their part is utterly rediculous.
I also don't think it has anything to do with money. I've worked with plenty of parents with money and they still do their part as parents.
Maybe that should be your minimal requirement when interviewing from now on......pass on any parent who doesn't see that they have a personal responsibility to make sure their child is given their attention as a priority.
Sorry you are dealing with this. Parents definitely have a way of making this job much harder than it needs to be.
I have seen parents with no money, dig for the deepest for the child and I have seen parents with money not bother for the child. I agree about the money not having anything to do with it. I am not understanding how these parents are having these high demands but yet don't see how they have a responsibility in making sure those demands are met.
You aren't hired help. You aren't their personal nanny.
For them to "demand" specific things for a child care program and then not do their part is utterly rediculous.
I also don't think it has anything to do with money. I've worked with plenty of parents with money and they still do their part as parents.
Maybe that should be your minimal requirement when interviewing from now on......pass on any parent who doesn't see that they have a personal responsibility to make sure their child is given their attention as a priority.
Sorry you are dealing with this. Parents definitely have a way of making this job much harder than it needs to be.
Then again I think I have seen it all. I am lucky I have parents that truly care, good clients to work with right now. When I worked at a Center years ago I worked with crappy parents. The only difference between the two are that I interview my clients and pick who I want to work with, before I took who came in. I agree that you should filter out your clients more when interviewing. Tweak your program as you go and learn. I am still learning new things because we are working with people that are multi faceted. What is important to one is not to another.
Country Kids 10:32 AM 01-23-2013
Originally Posted by daycarediva:
*clapping*
I am always at a loss when parents say they didn't have time. Um, I have 4 children, in bachelors degree classes, take additional classes for state requirements, work 60+ hours a week, etc etc etc.....
Just this morning I got "We didn't have time for breakfast or to change so can you give him a little something now, here are his clothes.?" No. Breakfast is earlier than your drop off. Hand back clothes, you can change him. Get up earlier and plan for your day.
I personally know it can be done! I worked one time (outside the home) and had to be at work by 5:30-*clapping*
I am always at a loss when parents say they didn't have time. Um, I have 4 children, in bachelors degree classes, take additional classes for state requirements, work 60+ hours a week, etc etc etc.....
Just this morning I got "We didn't have time for breakfast or to change so can you give him a little something now, here are his clothes.?" No. Breakfast is earlier than your drop off. Hand back clothes, you can change him. Get up earlier and plan for your day.
. I had my child up, fed, dressed and ready for the day. Yes, they ate breakfast again because they were ready by then, yes they took a good nap, and yes there was a definent bedtime routine. Was it easy, no but we made it through. There were nights I did this by myself as my husband would work 12 hour shifts at night. So some times I may only seem him an hour a day!
My3cents 10:34 AM 01-23-2013
Originally Posted by daycare:
thanks so much..... and thank you all for the advice....
thinking about everything eveyone has said, I do think that the parents have gotten laxed. We just got done with having a lot of time off from the holiays, then when everyone came back kids were all sick. some days I only had two kids in care. This would really be the first week where things were some what normal. No days off and no kids out sick.
I think that me speaking up and brining everyone back on board is what needs to happen.
my kids have been sick too here and there. I just go on with what I have planned for the day. If I can I will update when the child comes back but if I can't we move forward. Even though the kids are back, some are still not up to par so we slow things down and work around that.thanks so much..... and thank you all for the advice....
thinking about everything eveyone has said, I do think that the parents have gotten laxed. We just got done with having a lot of time off from the holiays, then when everyone came back kids were all sick. some days I only had two kids in care. This would really be the first week where things were some what normal. No days off and no kids out sick.
I think that me speaking up and brining everyone back on board is what needs to happen.
I agree with you, speak up and gather everyone in again. When things are not working out for me, I take a step back and see what I can do that will help make it work again. I often come here for helps and get great advice, even if I don't want to hear it sometimes. I know the peeps here are in my corner and looking out for my best interest. Grateful for this forum I am!
countrymom 10:38 AM 01-23-2013
have you tried a whole week of not doing anything. No program and then see if it makes a difference. See if the children ask for it, see if the parents ask for it. We can all give our opinions but maybe if you took it all away and go from there.
mom2many 10:41 AM 01-23-2013
daycare, I totally understand your frustration and have had some great parents that are totally on top of making sure their child has what they need here every single day and others that seem so busy with their own lives & careers that they forget to bring something basic like shoes!
It happens rarely, but it does happen, so I can imagine how difficult it would be to have some parents remember to bring the extras that are required for field trips! However, like pps mentioned...it is what they signed up for, so it's not like it is a big surprise and it's their responsibility to make sure their child has what they need.
I know what it is like to send out notices, post things, send emails etc and still have parents "forget".
Now whenever someone forgets something, I have parents simply leave the item on the bench on my covered porch, where I keep all of the kids bags. This way I can retrieve it later and it never disrupts our routine.
It happens rarely, but it does happen, so I can imagine how difficult it would be to have some parents remember to bring the extras that are required for field trips! However, like pps mentioned...it is what they signed up for, so it's not like it is a big surprise and it's their responsibility to make sure their child has what they need.
I know what it is like to send out notices, post things, send emails etc and still have parents "forget".
Now whenever someone forgets something, I have parents simply leave the item on the bench on my covered porch, where I keep all of the kids bags. This way I can retrieve it later and it never disrupts our routine.
daycare 10:42 AM 01-23-2013
Originally Posted by countrymom:
have you tried a whole week of not doing anything. No program and then see if it makes a difference. See if the children ask for it, see if the parents ask for it. We can all give our opinions but maybe if you took it all away and go from there.
yes, over the summer somtimes there are days that it gets so hot I have had to do a week of nothing. The kids go nuts and the parents complain because the kids are so pent up with energy that their behavior goes out the window here and at home....have you tried a whole week of not doing anything. No program and then see if it makes a difference. See if the children ask for it, see if the parents ask for it. We can all give our opinions but maybe if you took it all away and go from there.
daycare 10:47 AM 01-23-2013
Originally Posted by mom2many:
daycare, I totally understand your frustration and have had some great parents that are totally on top of making sure their child has what they need here every single day and others that seem so busy with their own lives & careers that they forget to bring something basic like shoes!
It happens rarely, but it does happen, so I can imagine how difficult it would be to have some parents remember to bring the extras that are required for field trips! However, like pps mentioned...it is what they signed up for, so it's not like it is a big surprise and it's their responsibility to make sure their child has what they need.
I know what it is like to send out notices, post things, send emails etc and still have parents "forget".
Now whenever someone forgets something, I have parents simply leave the item on the bench on my covered porch, where I keep all of the kids bags. This way I can retrieve it later and it never disrupts our routine.
I did think about this idea...I dont have a covered porch, but I can have them leave it in the front seat of my car or have them leave it in a plastic bag on the door. I have done that in the past where a kid forgot their lovey and the parent came and placed it on the door knob, sent me a text to let me know it was there. Then when I had a break in our schedule I went to get it our my asst did.daycare, I totally understand your frustration and have had some great parents that are totally on top of making sure their child has what they need here every single day and others that seem so busy with their own lives & careers that they forget to bring something basic like shoes!
It happens rarely, but it does happen, so I can imagine how difficult it would be to have some parents remember to bring the extras that are required for field trips! However, like pps mentioned...it is what they signed up for, so it's not like it is a big surprise and it's their responsibility to make sure their child has what they need.
I know what it is like to send out notices, post things, send emails etc and still have parents "forget".
Now whenever someone forgets something, I have parents simply leave the item on the bench on my covered porch, where I keep all of the kids bags. This way I can retrieve it later and it never disrupts our routine.
It ssoooooooooooo hard for a child to see their parents again in the morning and have to say good bye twice. UGH I hate it
daycare 03:33 PM 01-23-2013
wanted to update on this..
So I took your guys advice and sent out a letter to all of parents and I got back a great response.
I told them all that I know things have been crazy with all of the holidays and the kids all out being sick the past several weeks.
I explained that I know things can get hetic, but in order to assure everyone that I could continue to run our program smoothly that I needed everyone back on track.
I then went on to say that I never want to be the bad guy, but if any child shows up with out the correct supplies that I will send them back home for the day or if they can get back here before 9am, they will be able to join us. As well as told them all about the fees that would be charged for not having proper items.....
3 parents emailed me with deep apologies telling me that they love everything that I do and will be sure to get back on track.
One mom called me and really just made my day. She even booked me an interview for last and final full time spot.
I am happy that I talked to you guys about it and found some way to get everyone back. Sometimes I just need that kick to remind me what to do to get back on top of everything.....
So I took your guys advice and sent out a letter to all of parents and I got back a great response.
I told them all that I know things have been crazy with all of the holidays and the kids all out being sick the past several weeks.
I explained that I know things can get hetic, but in order to assure everyone that I could continue to run our program smoothly that I needed everyone back on track.
I then went on to say that I never want to be the bad guy, but if any child shows up with out the correct supplies that I will send them back home for the day or if they can get back here before 9am, they will be able to join us. As well as told them all about the fees that would be charged for not having proper items.....
3 parents emailed me with deep apologies telling me that they love everything that I do and will be sure to get back on track.
One mom called me and really just made my day. She even booked me an interview for last and final full time spot.
I am happy that I talked to you guys about it and found some way to get everyone back. Sometimes I just need that kick to remind me what to do to get back on top of everything.....
wdmmom 08:33 PM 01-23-2013
Originally Posted by cheerfuldom:
I wouldnt pull the plug, for the kids sake. but i would start doing less for your own sanity. perhaps you are stretching yourself too thin with all the extras and such.
if clothing is the main issue, i would invest in basic sweatpants, sweatshirts for use during daycare. change them back to their regular clothes before sending them home. you only need a couple pairs just for emergency and i know Walmart sells garanimal sweats as low as $1 a piece. to me, it would be worth it. i would also round up some sneakers. i did the same thing this year with snow clothing and most of the items i rounded up were given free from various places.....or purchased second hand and very cheaply. it was worth it to me to not have these issues with the parents.
if it is lunch and other necessities, i would make up fees for everything and add it to the next bill when parents forget and then provide the item myself for the day.
Yep!!! Hit up Walmart, 2nd hand stores or garage sale and get yourself a stock of clothing, coats and shoes. I wouldnt pull the plug, for the kids sake. but i would start doing less for your own sanity. perhaps you are stretching yourself too thin with all the extras and such.
if clothing is the main issue, i would invest in basic sweatpants, sweatshirts for use during daycare. change them back to their regular clothes before sending them home. you only need a couple pairs just for emergency and i know Walmart sells garanimal sweats as low as $1 a piece. to me, it would be worth it. i would also round up some sneakers. i did the same thing this year with snow clothing and most of the items i rounded up were given free from various places.....or purchased second hand and very cheaply. it was worth it to me to not have these issues with the parents.
if it is lunch and other necessities, i would make up fees for everything and add it to the next bill when parents forget and then provide the item myself for the day.
When it comes to a fee for something, have them pay on Friday for the upcoming week. No pay on Friday, no care on field trip day. And anyone needing a sack lunch, $5 fee for you to provide.
My3cents 04:27 AM 01-24-2013
Originally Posted by daycare:
wanted to update on this..
So I took your guys advice and sent out a letter to all of parents and I got back a great response.
I told them all that I know things have been crazy with all of the holidays and the kids all out being sick the past several weeks.
I explained that I know things can get hetic, but in order to assure everyone that I could continue to run our program smoothly that I needed everyone back on track.
I then went on to say that I never want to be the bad guy, but if any child shows up with out the correct supplies that I will send them back home for the day or if they can get back here before 9am, they will be able to join us. As well as told them all about the fees that would be charged for not having proper items.....
3 parents emailed me with deep apologies telling me that they love everything that I do and will be sure to get back on track.
One mom called me and really just made my day. She even booked me an interview for last and final full time spot.
I am happy that I talked to you guys about it and found some way to get everyone back. Sometimes I just need that kick to remind me what to do to get back on top of everything.....
wanted to update on this..
So I took your guys advice and sent out a letter to all of parents and I got back a great response.
I told them all that I know things have been crazy with all of the holidays and the kids all out being sick the past several weeks.
I explained that I know things can get hetic, but in order to assure everyone that I could continue to run our program smoothly that I needed everyone back on track.
I then went on to say that I never want to be the bad guy, but if any child shows up with out the correct supplies that I will send them back home for the day or if they can get back here before 9am, they will be able to join us. As well as told them all about the fees that would be charged for not having proper items.....
3 parents emailed me with deep apologies telling me that they love everything that I do and will be sure to get back on track.
One mom called me and really just made my day. She even booked me an interview for last and final full time spot.
I am happy that I talked to you guys about it and found some way to get everyone back. Sometimes I just need that kick to remind me what to do to get back on top of everything.....
We all need that kick from time to time. So glad you were able to make it work. Sounds like you have a great group of kids and parents and everyone was just get settled in their ways and needed to regroup.
countrymom 06:00 AM 01-24-2013
thats great that they all agreed, but for how long. I don't want to burst your bubble, but your comment about how bored the kids where in the summer and the parents where complaing, well it got me thinking.
I think that your families and the kids expect you to entertain them. Sounds to me like if they are not busy every single minute then they don't know what know what to do. Just like the field trips, the parents want you to do them because a)that means the parents dont' have too b)your entertaining them.
you probably don't realize it, but its that comment that really got me thinking. Don't take it the wrong way, but sit back and look and listen.
I think that your families and the kids expect you to entertain them. Sounds to me like if they are not busy every single minute then they don't know what know what to do. Just like the field trips, the parents want you to do them because a)that means the parents dont' have too b)your entertaining them.
you probably don't realize it, but its that comment that really got me thinking. Don't take it the wrong way, but sit back and look and listen.
Mom&Provider 07:04 AM 01-24-2013
I wouldn't stop everything completely, you obviously enjoy doing it too! I would stop with all the extra handouts/emails of caledars etc. Maybe just give a reminder to the parents at pick-up the day prior that you are going to do X tomorrow, so please send warm clothing, boots etc. and if someone comes without the proper attire, it's cancelled. That way if you are ever asked why you didn't go or don't do this and that anymore you have a reason and it's in the parents hands to fix the issue.
daycare 08:10 AM 01-24-2013
Originally Posted by countrymom:
thats great that they all agreed, but for how long. I don't want to burst your bubble, but your comment about how bored the kids where in the summer and the parents where complaing, well it got me thinking.
I think that your families and the kids expect you to entertain them. Sounds to me like if they are not busy every single minute then they don't know what know what to do. Just like the field trips, the parents want you to do them because a)that means the parents dont' have too b)your entertaining them.
you probably don't realize it, but its that comment that really got me thinking. Don't take it the wrong way, but sit back and look and listen.
I do hear what you are saying, but this is my program. I have spent many years putting it together. Most of our lessons take place in our community and I am never going to change the way that I run my business.thats great that they all agreed, but for how long. I don't want to burst your bubble, but your comment about how bored the kids where in the summer and the parents where complaing, well it got me thinking.
I think that your families and the kids expect you to entertain them. Sounds to me like if they are not busy every single minute then they don't know what know what to do. Just like the field trips, the parents want you to do them because a)that means the parents dont' have too b)your entertaining them.
you probably don't realize it, but its that comment that really got me thinking. Don't take it the wrong way, but sit back and look and listen.
I know that the reason the parents complained about the week we did nothing was because all of the kids were out of their normal routine and it just messed everything up. BUt they did understand that it was just too dangerous to be outside for any great length of time due to the extreme heat.
I'm very happy to have this form to remind me how to pull it all together. Sometimes even the most obvious or simple things get away from me because I let myself get to frustrated with the situations.
Thanks again everyone.
Oh and today..... I had 2 parents bring in all of the supplies for next month and 2 others that said they were bringing it tomorrow.