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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Could Use Some Input On Child
tenderhearts 08:53 AM 08-28-2020
I have a dcg that will be 3 beginning of Oct. She has been with me since June and is a smart little girl. My issue and I will do the best I can to describe, she doesn't seem to know how to regulate her feelings on anything. Every second of the day it can be happy fun and nice to being the complete opposite. It's always about either she doesn't want to do what you ask her to do or if one of the kids doesn't do what she wants them to do. Some examples, she will walk right into and between where other kids are playing, then proceed to just take something that someone else has, if they say can I please have it back she will start yelling no I want it, if I intervene I talk and walk her through how she should ask ect. she will usually sit down throw herself back and start crying saying I don't want to or kick something or even throw that toy. Another example, is if she is playing with someone and they don't play how she wants she will start to either pull their shirt, never hard I think she knows she's not suppose to but enough where the other child will say something to me but she will start crying or lay down and start crying and then if for whatever reason the other child decides to comply with her rules, she doesn't want it that way and start all over again, it's like she does not know how to play. I will put her down for nap and she'll say I'm a princess and I'll repeat it she will say no I'm not a princess.
I know that at her previous daycare she wasn't around kids her age and the provider let her watch tv all day, her parents do not seem like they let her do what she wants they are very calm when dealing with her but I don't want to term her either as I don't think it would be doing her any favors. I demonstrate constantly how we play with others ect.
Any ideas on maybe what could be going on? or what I can do? I am really hoping once we start preschool activities things will get better as there will be more structure to our day any advise would be greatly appreciated.
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Unregistered 10:05 AM 08-28-2020
From my experience it could be a number of things. I know some kids who are the only child and have not had a lot of play dates can act like that. Your dcg could have a neurological condition such as autism, add, adhd or odd. Or dcg could need more time to mature than other kids her age.
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tenderhearts 10:42 AM 08-28-2020
Thank you those were things I was kind of thinking of, I'm leaning more towards she just needs to learn how to play and be a friend, but man it's exhausting but I also don't want to term because i think that could cause her more issues.
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Mariposa 11:45 AM 08-28-2020
My son is 3.5 and is doing the same stuff, he is not the only kid and does not have any conditions.
It is normal development. Practice and patience.
How is her eating and napping? My son was relentless hitting and knocking things.
And he refused naps. I finally got him to nap or quiet time in his room with dad.
And I converted a couple of stories to pertain to his behavior every night-asking if he knows someone like the characters|how happy I am he doesn't do that|can he watch for friends doing that, kept calm, taught kids to be calm, praisedthe positive, ignored some negative, gave more 1:1 time, and if he did something like the character I tell him to not act like that character.

He has had a great week. So nice
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tenderhearts 03:02 PM 08-28-2020
Oh sorry you're dealing with that, but sounds like you're on the right track with your son.
Her naps are pretty regular and the behavior seems a little better after naps but it quickly resumes. She can have a pretty good day here and there. She just has to argue about everything, if you say ok in 5 min we will clean up the toys for lunch she will start crying and fall to the floor and say I don't want lunch I don't want to eat, and if I say ok but you still need to help clean up the toys then she'll say I want to eat lunch its like she doesn't know what she wants or just likes arguing but she does it with the kids all the time, one of the kids was singing happy birthday even though it isn't anyones birthday and she just goes off about how it's not her birthday yet he wasn't singing it to her or near her.
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Mariposa 08:39 PM 08-28-2020
Try completely ignoring it and let her throw her fit, act like nothing happened. May take a couple of times.

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Ariana 04:40 PM 08-29-2020
It sounds like she wants to play but doesn’t know how to get invited into play? Maybe give her some things she can say, asking to play or asking for a toy etc. There are a ton of kids like this who act really badly when all they want to do is be included.
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tenderhearts 10:17 AM 08-31-2020
Oh yes we do that all the time during the day. It's not with just play, I can say ok it's time to clean up for lunch and she'll throw a fit and say no she doesn't want to eat lunch and I'll say ok that's fine but you still need to help everyone clean up and then she'll throw a fit and say she wants to eat it's just she doesn't seem to know what she wants or just wants to complain about everything.
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Tags:3 year old, age appropriate behavior
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