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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Head butting and aggressive! You won't believe this!
Soupyszoo 08:13 AM 04-25-2012
Dcb 19mo has been hitting and head butting my other dcks and throwing things constantly... All of a sudden the nicest little boy has become aggressive and aweful! Practically overnight. He's just angry and mean!

When dcm drops off and picks up she kind of jokes about the aggression like its cute or something! She showed me her busted lip from where dcb head butted her and told me that he threw the remote at his brothers head and broke open his eyebrow, and pretty much just blows it off, like WHATEVER! (among a hundred other acts of aggression)

Today dcd dropped off and was standing in the entry way saying an "extended goodbye" (which I hate) when he playingly, but HARD, head butted DCB!! The DCD head butted the DCB!! Just in case you didn't read that right I said, the DAYCARE DAD head butted the DAYCARE BOY 19 months old. And proceeded to do it a couple times.

ARE YOU EFFING KIDDING ME?!?! Well there ya go... I mean how STUPID CAN YOU BE?!?!

Guess I get to have ANOTHER "CONVERSATION" with stupid people again!

So my question, besides the obvious, how do I approach this without outwardly calling them STUPID? I will not tolerate the violence, but need to make them aware before I can term... They are not the kind of parents that will be open to changing their lack of parenting to correct a negative behavior... So I'm not very hopeful, grrrrrrrr.
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Michelle 08:27 AM 04-25-2012
Find a local parenting class flyer and give it to them.
Sometimes you can talk til blue in the face but if you give them an actual piece of paper to read, maybe they will realize and maybe even go?
Along with that paper google brain damage in babies and give them that too....hint hint, also maybe give them the part of your contract that states you are a mandated reporter and will have to report any and all child abuse.

If they don't get a clue after that, I don't know, you might have to ask them to have their bodies frozen when they die so scientist could study what cause the stupid gene in humans.
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cheerfuldom 08:47 AM 04-25-2012
Let them know that this behavior is 100% unacceptable in your daycare. The boy will not be allowed to do this, nor will the parents be allowed to do this in your home. If this behavior does not stop asap, you will have to let them go. Aggressive kids can hurt someone BAD in an instant and you will not be wanting one of your dc kids to get a busted eyebrow in your care. Trust me, no parent is going to happy about that!
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Soupyszoo 08:51 AM 04-25-2012
Originally Posted by cheerfuldom:
Let them know that this behavior is 100% unacceptable in your daycare. The boy will not be allowed to do this, nor will the parents be allowed to do this in your home. If this behavior does not stop asap, you will have to let them go. Aggressive kids can hurt someone BAD in an instant and you will not be wanting one of your dc kids to get a busted eyebrow in your care. Trust me, no parent is going to happy about that!
Exactly! I wouldn't be okay with my dd head butting hitting or throwing things at ANYONE! I feel like I can't leave him alone for one second or he gets mad at someone and throws something at them. The other day he hit my dd in the forehead with a hard toy. I can't handle that!
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Heidi 09:07 AM 04-25-2012
My 24 month old has been just like this lately. Used to be the sweetest little guy who would play for hours, but overnight has started pushing and slapping (no head butting...yay).

His parents are not the kind of people that tolerate this behavior. They give him time-outs when he pulls it on them, and do occasionally spank as an exclamation point (but not for hitting). I am not supposed to give time outs to anyone under 3 per our licensing regs. So, time outs are pretty useless because if they haven't learned to sit in timeout by 3, they pretty much wont stay ever, IMO. sorry...got off track there.

With my little guy, I think it's that he just needs more alone space than I have. Because my FCCERS consultant told me I always have to be in the same room with them, I have been bringing into my rather small playroom instead of letting him stay in the nearby livingroom. I think this just causes the little guy too much stress, and he lashes out. Like I said, he could play for hours by himself. He does like other kids..laughs with them and interacts, but I think he just prefers some space. My other children are all from the same family, and they are pretty physical. There is a lot of budging and hugging and touching, and he's not fond of all that contact. His own sibs are all at least 6 years older, so there's none of that at home.
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Ariana 09:08 AM 04-25-2012
Originally Posted by :
They are not the kind of parents that will be open to changing their lack of parenting to correct a negative behavior...
Then I sure as heck won't be the type of provider who puts up with this blatant disregard for other children's safety. The dad is obviously an idiot so I'd show his butt to the curb...sorry
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Soupyszoo 09:13 AM 04-25-2012
Originally Posted by Ariana:
Then I sure as heck won't be the type of provider who puts up with this blatant disregard for other children's safety. The dad is obviously an idiot so I'd show his butt to the curb...sorry
Don't be sorry! I agree! He also told me he's been off all week, yet dcb has been here hurting everyone for 11 hours a day! Real nice.
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WImom 10:27 AM 04-25-2012
I had a boy that spanked me on the butt once, totally shocked me. Then did it to two other kids soon after. Come to find out the parents do that to him all the time and and let him do it to them and they all laugh about it.

Luckily it stopped after once but with this family it always seems to be something new. So I feel you on 'just one more thing'. Drive me nuts when parents don't think first and headbutting...luckily that wasn't my problem...way worse.
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