Daycare.com Forum
Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Kicking Myself In Rear! Vent
Jack Sprat 12:39 PM 01-07-2014
I have a new dcb who is 14 months, only child, cared for by grandmothers. DCB's mother called in June wanting to enroll him. Then she backed out saying they decided to keep him with grandparents. So she calls beginning of Dec. wanting him to start in Jan. since is now over a year old. We have interview, dcb is busy, and has not structure anywhere and pretty much rules the roost but, listened well to me. So dcm then goes on to change her mind THREE TIMES in a two week period about whether or not to send him to daycare. I reassured her the first time that the first week would be hard for all of us. More so her and him but, it does get easier. After that I ignored the messages and washed my hands of it. Sooo now he is here with a two week prepaid "trial". She wanted a month but, I have a waiting list.
I want to cry! Its been the most awful two days of daycare. Its constant redirecting, telling him to have nice hands ( he hits EVERYONE), not to climb on dining room table, telling him it hurts when he throws toys at dcks and me. I am at my wits end. I know it will slowly improve but, right now a week seems like an eternity. I should have told her no the first time she backed out.
Then to top it all off. A different DCM texts me at noon to let me know that she wouldn't be here till 5:40 to pick up. DCD has to work till 7p. Normally, I wouldn't mind but, I did have plans for tonight. Just a bad day needed to vent I guess.
I want to cry! Its been the most awful two days of daycare. Its constant redirecting, telling him to have nice hands ( he hits EVERYONE), not to climb on dining room table, telling him it hurts when he throws toys at dcks and me. I am at my wits end. I know it will slowly improve but, right now a week seems like an eternity. I should have told her no the first time she backed out.
Then to top it all off. A different DCM texts me at noon to let me know that she wouldn't be here till 5:40 to pick up. DCD has to work till 7p. Normally, I wouldn't mind but, I did have plans for tonight. Just a bad day needed to vent I guess.
butterfly 12:42 PM 01-07-2014
Term, that's what the trial period is for. And in the future, follow your gut! I learned that lesson the hard way too. 
Play Care 12:44 PM 01-07-2014
Originally Posted by butterfly:
Term, that's what the trial period is for. And in the future, follow your gut! I learned that lesson the hard way too.
Term, that's what the trial period is for. And in the future, follow your gut! I learned that lesson the hard way too.
And make sure you charge the other parent the late fee and make it clear this is unacceptable. It sounds as if you have other options. A seasoned provider once said the best way to get clients to behave is to term the bad ones and fill their spots immediately - other parents see that they can be replaced and start towing the line.
Jack Sprat 12:56 PM 01-07-2014
Yes, I'm thinking that is what will happen w/ dcb. I hate the thought as I feel like I failed. But, will give it two weeks since we did agree to that.
As far as late dcp yes they are getting a late charge. And a reminder that I am required by law to have so many hours of "child free" time. If child leaves at 6 then I will have 12 hours of "child free" time. Eight of those hours I spend sleeping or at least attempting to.
As far as late dcp yes they are getting a late charge. And a reminder that I am required by law to have so many hours of "child free" time. If child leaves at 6 then I will have 12 hours of "child free" time. Eight of those hours I spend sleeping or at least attempting to.
DaycareMom 02:48 PM 01-07-2014
Originally Posted by Jack Sprat:
I have a new dcb who is 14 months, only child, cared for by grandmothers. DCB's mother called in June wanting to enroll him. Then she backed out saying they decided to keep him with grandparents. So she calls beginning of Dec. wanting him to start in Jan. since is now over a year old. We have interview, dcb is busy, and has not structure anywhere and pretty much rules the roost but, listened well to me. So dcm then goes on to change her mind THREE TIMES in a two week period about whether or not to send him to daycare. I reassured her the first time that the first week would be hard for all of us. More so her and him but, it does get easier. After that I ignored the messages and washed my hands of it. Sooo now he is here with a two week prepaid "trial". She wanted a month but, I have a waiting list.
I want to cry! Its been the most awful two days of daycare. Its constant redirecting, telling him to have nice hands ( he hits EVERYONE), not to climb on dining room table, telling him it hurts when he throws toys at dcks and me. I am at my wits end. I know it will slowly improve but, right now a week seems like an eternity. I should have told her no the first time she backed out.
Then to top it all off. A different DCM texts me at noon to let me know that she wouldn't be here till 5:40 to pick up. DCD has to work till 7p. Normally, I wouldn't mind but, I did have plans for tonight. Just a bad day needed to vent I guess.
I have a new dcb who is 14 months, only child, cared for by grandmothers. DCB's mother called in June wanting to enroll him. Then she backed out saying they decided to keep him with grandparents. So she calls beginning of Dec. wanting him to start in Jan. since is now over a year old. We have interview, dcb is busy, and has not structure anywhere and pretty much rules the roost but, listened well to me. So dcm then goes on to change her mind THREE TIMES in a two week period about whether or not to send him to daycare. I reassured her the first time that the first week would be hard for all of us. More so her and him but, it does get easier. After that I ignored the messages and washed my hands of it. Sooo now he is here with a two week prepaid "trial". She wanted a month but, I have a waiting list.
I want to cry! Its been the most awful two days of daycare. Its constant redirecting, telling him to have nice hands ( he hits EVERYONE), not to climb on dining room table, telling him it hurts when he throws toys at dcks and me. I am at my wits end. I know it will slowly improve but, right now a week seems like an eternity. I should have told her no the first time she backed out.
Then to top it all off. A different DCM texts me at noon to let me know that she wouldn't be here till 5:40 to pick up. DCD has to work till 7p. Normally, I wouldn't mind but, I did have plans for tonight. Just a bad day needed to vent I guess.
Have you tried separating him from the group? Giving him his own play space that he doesn't have access to the other kids, dining room table, etc?
Sounds like he needs to learn boundaries.
Good Luck!
daycarediva 03:36 PM 01-07-2014
If you have a waiting list, with 'better' options, I would term. That is going to take MONTHS to resolve, and Mom will have to be on board, telling him no when he hits, throws toys, etc.
TaylorTots 04:56 PM 01-07-2014
Originally Posted by daycarediva:
If you have a waiting list, with 'better' options, I would term. That is going to take MONTHS to resolve, and Mom will have to be on board, telling him no when he hits, throws toys, etc.
If you have a waiting list, with 'better' options, I would term. That is going to take MONTHS to resolve, and Mom will have to be on board, telling him no when he hits, throws toys, etc.
Agree.
wdmmom 05:17 PM 01-07-2014
First off...I would invest in a playard. New dcb needs to get acclimated to your home and your schedule before he needs to get acclimated with the other kids. All newbies get minimal group interaction to start with (depending on age). It's far less stressful introducing them an hour or two out of the day rather than constantly redirecting them all day long.
If you think DCM is flaky, I would start interviewing other families on your waiting list and look to fill the position with a better client.
As for late DCM, I would tell her that contacting you and telling you that you are working late is completely unacceptable. Closing times are in place for a reason and she needs to be the one that needs to be accommodating of such. I would tell her that future requests need to be done in writing and submitted the day before. You can accommodate such plans the day of anymore.
If you think DCM is flaky, I would start interviewing other families on your waiting list and look to fill the position with a better client.
As for late DCM, I would tell her that contacting you and telling you that you are working late is completely unacceptable. Closing times are in place for a reason and she needs to be the one that needs to be accommodating of such. I would tell her that future requests need to be done in writing and submitted the day before. You can accommodate such plans the day of anymore.
Jack Sprat 12:28 PM 01-09-2014
DCB left after lunch today. He was acting like he felt bad, ear tugging, rubbing eyes and of course crying.
DCM and I talked about him coming only in mornings and leaving at nap. He hasn't napped here longer then 20 minutes this week. DCM thought this was strange. Not sure why as he sleeps wherever he passes out at when at the grandparents. DCM said he is very crabby and clingy at home this week. Not like his normal self at all. I told her he is the same here and that at home that can be expected. I did tell her I felt we needed to give it a solid two weeks.
I did express that I felt coming in mornings would be best and doing nap with grandparents. My thinking is if he exhausted that would be another cause for the clinginess in the evenings. She said he also go to nap/bed at night with a sippy cup of milk. I told her I could not do that and would not do that.
Any thoughts???
DCM and I talked about him coming only in mornings and leaving at nap. He hasn't napped here longer then 20 minutes this week. DCM thought this was strange. Not sure why as he sleeps wherever he passes out at when at the grandparents. DCM said he is very crabby and clingy at home this week. Not like his normal self at all. I told her he is the same here and that at home that can be expected. I did tell her I felt we needed to give it a solid two weeks.
I did express that I felt coming in mornings would be best and doing nap with grandparents. My thinking is if he exhausted that would be another cause for the clinginess in the evenings. She said he also go to nap/bed at night with a sippy cup of milk. I told her I could not do that and would not do that.
Any thoughts???
butterfly 12:32 PM 01-09-2014
Originally Posted by Jack Sprat:
DCB left after lunch today. He was acting like he felt bad, ear tugging, rubbing eyes and of course crying.
DCM and I talked about him coming only in mornings and leaving at nap. He hasn't napped here longer then 20 minutes this week. DCM thought this was strange. Not sure why as he sleeps wherever he passes out at when at the grandparents. DCM said he is very crabby and clingy at home this week. Not like his normal self at all. I told her he is the same here and that at home that can be expected. I did tell her I felt we needed to give it a solid two weeks.
I did express that I felt coming in mornings would be best and doing nap with grandparents. My thinking is if he exhausted that would be another cause for the clinginess in the evenings. She said he also go to nap/bed at night with a sippy cup of milk. I told her I could not do that and would not do that.
Any thoughts???
Ear infection?DCB left after lunch today. He was acting like he felt bad, ear tugging, rubbing eyes and of course crying.
DCM and I talked about him coming only in mornings and leaving at nap. He hasn't napped here longer then 20 minutes this week. DCM thought this was strange. Not sure why as he sleeps wherever he passes out at when at the grandparents. DCM said he is very crabby and clingy at home this week. Not like his normal self at all. I told her he is the same here and that at home that can be expected. I did tell her I felt we needed to give it a solid two weeks.
I did express that I felt coming in mornings would be best and doing nap with grandparents. My thinking is if he exhausted that would be another cause for the clinginess in the evenings. She said he also go to nap/bed at night with a sippy cup of milk. I told her I could not do that and would not do that.
Any thoughts???
Jack Sprat 12:43 PM 01-09-2014
My thoughts too! Mom didn't seem to think so. Although this child has chronic ear infections, first one at 4 weeks. Double ear infection. No fever etc. DCP has no idea. She thought teething. Which I could see too as he soaks his shirts(drool) within an hour of being here. I put bibs on him and he screams and rips them off. So I put on bib then another shirt.
I don't think she was going to have him checked out.
I don't think she was going to have him checked out.
JenNJ 02:10 PM 01-09-2014
He has ear infections from laying in bed with a cup of milk!!! It's so bad for their ears.
Jack Sprat 05:25 PM 01-09-2014
Originally Posted by JenNJ:
He has ear infections from laying in bed with a cup of milk!!! It's so bad for their ears.
My thoughts too!!He has ear infections from laying in bed with a cup of milk!!! It's so bad for their ears.
Jack Sprat 11:02 AM 01-10-2014
DCM called last night. They are not coming back. She said that this week at home (2 evenings) has been awful. Clingy,crying etc. She doesn't feel he is ready, even for half day. She has a relative that does daycare and thought they would wait till April or May and try again. Thinking it will be easier when he is older and with someone he knows.
I am relieved yet feel an honest effort wasn't given. I feel it's not helping dcb at all. But, I did try while he is here. Now get to wait for next kiddo to begin!
I am relieved yet feel an honest effort wasn't given. I feel it's not helping dcb at all. But, I did try while he is here. Now get to wait for next kiddo to begin!