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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>16 Month Old Screams All Day
Ac114 09:58 AM 08-19-2019
I have 16 month old twin boys that I have had in care since they were 5 months old. They were the easiest infants I had ever dealt with. Went down for naps without all the extra, ate on a pretty strict, standard schedule at the same time etc. somewhere around 10 months old , one of the twins kind of switched. Always unhappy, cries and whines for several hours on and off every single day. Maybe 1 out of the 5 days he is happy and content and doesn’t cry but this is rare. I’m thinking he does the same thing at home because they were in care from 8:30-5:15 and that became 8, then 7:45 to now parents are pulling in my driveway at 6:55, waiting for me to open my door at 7:00am. I’ve talked to both parents about him and they said he’s the same way at home and they are unsure why he’s like that but they just “deal with it” I’m seriously at my wits end. What could possibly be wrong. It’s 1pm. And he has screamed at the top of his lungs on and off since 9am.
Side note- he developed a rash around his mouth and eyes about a month ago. Pediatrician said it’s baby acne and nothing to worry about. They’ve been using a steroid cream and it helps but I suggested a food allergy. They made a dermatologist appt but that’s not for another couple of months. Is it possible that the rash and the screaming are related, like he’s in pain?
I’m not in a position to term this family but I can not handle the day in and day out screaming. Any suggestions? Please Help me because I am slowly going insane.
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jenboo 10:14 AM 08-19-2019
Im no expert but I've heard of dairy allergies/ intolerances causing rashes.
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Ac114 10:32 AM 08-19-2019
Originally Posted by jenboo:
Im no expert but I've heard of dairy allergies/ intolerances causing rashes.
That’s exactly what I suggested too. Anytime he drank milk he would have non stop runny diapers. I’m talking 8-10 in an 8 hr period. I stopped serving him milk and the poopy diapers stopped. But the parents don’t want to listen to my suggestions. They think he’s allergic to yogurt so we stopped giving him yogurt but he still has this rash. Idk
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Valerie928 11:06 AM 08-19-2019
It really does seem like something is off with this kid. Can his parents possibly get an appointment sooner. The only way you'll ever know is to have him tested. I feel your pain and I am about to go insane with you. Having a tough dck or baby is so draining.
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Ariana 11:56 AM 08-19-2019
Definitely sounds allergy or sensitivity related. If you suspect dairy I would get them to cut it all out for at least 2 weeks to get it out of his system.

The only dairy allergy that will show up on a test is an allergy to casein protein. But you can be sensitive to whey or lactose. Whey tends to cause skin issues and asthma, and lactose causes gastrointestinal problems.

In my experience no one wants to get rid of dairy they are way too dependent on it and have no clue about alternatives. They don’t mind seeing their kids suffer because you are dealing with it mainly and it is too hard for them. I would let them know that it is causing major disruption and you may need to term if they don’t try something.
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Cat Herder 01:57 PM 08-19-2019
An extra 7.5 hours per week also sounds like a change of circumstance in this child's/family's life. Have you addressed what changes precipitated this? New job? New hours? More stress?

Have you changed your rates to reflect this?
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Ac114 05:37 AM 08-20-2019
Originally Posted by Cat Herder:
An extra 7.5 hours per week also sounds like a change of circumstance in this child's/family's life. Have you addressed what changes precipitated this? New job? New hours? More stress?

Have you changed your rates to reflect this?
I know they put their house on the market a few weeks ago and purchased another home so I don’t know if that’s what is causing the added stress. I charge by the day but I don’t have any families that use the entire timeframe of my open to close hours so now that’s it’s been going on for several months now I don’t know how or what to say to change it.

All they say is that it’s the same screaming all day at home as well and they aren’t sure how to fix it. They are so non chalant about it. Dad works out of state every weekend so mom has them by herself and she tries to find some kind of side job so her mom watches them on Saturday. So on top of being in my care for 50 plus hrs a week they are also away from them on the weekend. That may also contribute to the unhappiness. They NEVER miss a day of care. Mom and dad took 2 weeks off during Christmas last year and they were here every single day while mom and dad ran “errands”.
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Cat Herder 05:55 AM 08-20-2019
Sounds like the twins each have their own style for demanding attention. Sounds like they don't get much.

I have had 4 sets of twins, now. In each set one always seemed to be more doted on. Here, that child tended to be my more difficult one.
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Ariana 08:17 AM 08-20-2019
For one of my DCGs who was 3 at the time, the sudden change in behavior came from mom’s depression. The change happened and I had no clue but a few months later mom confided in me that she has depression and it went way down hill at the same time that DCG’s personality changed.

If mom is spending as little time with the kids as possible and her husband is out of town a lot it might be something like that going on. Selling a house is also really stressful and to add to that possible food intolerances, this poor kid is having a rough time.
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Mom2Two 09:52 PM 08-20-2019
Hugs

Screaming babies is one of the worst things in daycare imo. Are they bringing baby longer to get a break from the screaming?

It sure doesn't sound normal. Can you probe more into their home situation? Has anything changed?

It's hard, but if you can find a way to make do without this income, it would be good. Can you find another family?

With all the screaming, I think they should put some pressure to get the appointment sooner. There are always cancellations of appointments. It's a bad situation.
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Ac114 10:40 AM 08-21-2019
Originally Posted by Mom2Two:
Hugs

Screaming babies is one of the worst things in daycare imo. Are they bringing baby longer to get a break from the screaming?

It sure doesn't sound normal. Can you probe more into their home situation? Has anything changed?

It's hard, but if you can find a way to make do without this income, it would be good. Can you find another family?

With all the screaming, I think they should put some pressure to get the appointment sooner. There are always cancellations of appointments. It's a bad situation.
They do bring them in earlier to get a break from the screaming. When mom drops off, she comes in frantic and half dressed and half hair and make up done like she just stopped in the middle of what she was doing to bring them here and go back home to get ready.

Dad does most drop offs and picks ups and he’s easy going, drops them, kisses them and goes. They do seem more excited when he picks up over mom.

I try to be empathetic, loving and giving hugs- which works for a short period of time until I have to direct my attention to anything that doesn’t involve my attention being solely on him.
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Tags:change of hours and contract, crying - all day, early arrival, home environment, rash
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