Default Style Register
Daycare.com Forum
Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Vent about DCG and Grandma
MNmamaOf4 08:41 PM 12-14-2011
**I'm not using anyone's name, just first letter...just never know!

DCG just turned 6 and in kindergarten, she gets off the bus here and is here a total of an hour to hour and a half after school. Her grandparents have custody of her. Today at pick-up, her grandma said to me "I have a question for you. What happened to M's hair?" I said "I don't know" and I looked at her and it was in a pony but messy from playing. She says "Well M says that P (my son) cut her hair." My son is 5 and has never cut his own hair or anyone else's hair. I said "Oh really, this is the first I'm hearing of this" She said "Well it happened a couple of weeks ago and there is a big chunk out of the front" I told her that the kids haven't had scissors for a while after school, just markers/crayons/paper and that I keep the scissors locked up and out of reach in my supply cabinet. She then said to her granddaughter "M, I thought you told A that P cut your hair?" M looks at her grandma and says "Oh, I guess I forgot". I then said "M, where were you when P cut your hair?" She stared at the floor for a few minutes and then looked at me and back at the floor and said "Umm, I don't remember". I reiterated to grandma that the kids are only allowed to have scissors at the kitchen table and never anywhere else and that they are locked up in my supply cabinet. I also asked my two older kids (5 yo and almost 7 yo) in front of the Grandma if either of them cut M's hair and they both swore up and down that they didn't. Grandma said to M, "Well, I guess we'll be talking about this at home." So I'm not sure what's going on or where they would have even gotten a scissors from where I wouldn't see them. And the fact that it was a couple weeks ago and I am just now hearing about it, really irritates me. DH and I asked both of our kids at dinner tonight about it and they both again said that neither of them did it and DH was very stern and said I don't want you to lie to me and they both again said they didn't do it and started crying because they didn't want to get in trouble. Her grandpa has been picking her up, but her grandma picked her up one day last week and called me twice last week and never once said anything about the "haircut". I don't know what to think. I'm a little irritated right now. I'm having a very difficult time believing that either of my two older kids did this. They aren't always angels, but they do know not to cut anyone's hair. I'll be interested to see what Grandma has to say tomorrow if she picks up. Thanks for letting me vent.

Grandma has said in the past that she's had issues with her granddaughter lying about different things. She's lived with her grandparents since she was 2 or 3 I believe.

UPDATE: Grandpa picked DCG up today. I said to him "So what did you guys find out about this hair cutting stuff?" He said "Oh, she was just quacking" Meaning she was just running her mouth and lying. He said she was suppose to apologize to me when she got off the bus and asked if she did. I said "No she didn't." Then he asks her in front of me if she apologized and she said "Yes I did" with a sheepish look on her face. And he said "Okay let's go" She got her coat and stuff on and he apologized to me about it. I said how we had a good talk with the kids about it at dinner and how they both were insistent that they didn't do it and that they were both crying saying they weren't lying and that they didn't cut M's hair. He told me he was sorry for all the trouble it caused and that M had to spend a long time sitting on her bed last night and that they still haven't gotten a straight answer out of her about where it happened, etc. I'm still irritated by it. I've had her in care full-time since April until she started school in September and she's just coming after school. I can only imagine what she's going to try and pull next summer.
Reply
Lucy 10:38 PM 12-14-2011
Something tells me the granddaughter cut her own hair and blamed it on your son. I'm curious to see what Grandma says tomorrow.
Reply
Meyou 04:19 AM 12-15-2011
I think she cut it herself and is making up a story. My 7 year old scalped herself (cut the hair to the scalp right in front...ugh!) last spring and told me a crazy story about a boy at school grabbing her in the hall and cutting it so she wouldn't get in trouble. She told me what he was wearing and everything!! She'd done it to herself the night before in her room and had sneaked by me the next morning by wearing a hat.
Reply
Kaddidle Care 04:41 AM 12-15-2011
I would suspect as the others here that she did it to herself. Don't fret on it.

If it had happened at your house you would have seen the hair when cleaning up. If you saw no hair, it didn't happen at your house.

Usually, it if's the front, it's usually done by the child herself.

I WOULD ask the Grandma if she found out what happened because hon, you and your son are due an apology.
Reply
Unregistered 06:33 AM 12-15-2011
I had a similar issue here with the dcb lying...dcb told his father that one of my grandsons had thrown his socks into the long grass at the back of our property...I questioned my grandson thoroughly and he swore he hadn't. Dcb still stuck to his story (although I already suspected he was lying ) so the next morning I made them BOTH go and hunt for the socks...they couldn't find them and grandson asked if we couldn't just pay the dad for them (dad made a stink saying that it's expensive always buying socks at $2.00 a pair (!) ) I agreed with my grandson because I wasn't about to argue over a stinking two dollars one more minute.

The dad tried to refuse to take it but I told him since it was such a problem the day before that he'd better darn well take it...he still refused so I put it in the kid's pocket and told him that that was the end of it..not another word!

Two days later, as the dcb was sitting in his mother's van while she and I were chatting, he was looking in his bag and said, "Hey look, Mom...here are my socks!" I have never wanted to strangle someone SO much!!

All that hoo-haa over the socks and the lying to get my grandson in trouble and the freakin' things were in his bag all the time!!!!

The mom looked sheepish and took off --lucky for her ! LOL!

I'm still mad about it and that was several years ago...
Reply
MNmamaOf4 06:43 AM 12-15-2011
Originally Posted by Kaddidle Care:
I would suspect as the others here that she did it to herself. Don't fret on it.

If it had happened at your house you would have seen the hair when cleaning up. If you saw no hair, it didn't happen at your house.

Usually, it if's the front, it's usually done by the child herself.

I WOULD ask the Grandma if she found out what happened because hon, you and your son are due an apology.
I agree. I'm anxious to talk to Grandma at pick up today. There was no hair anywhere and this girl has dark hair so I would have noticed it if it truly had been cut. She's also an huge tattle tale and as soon as something happens she's telling me even if someone just looked at her wrong. So I would think if this would have happened here, she would have told right away.
Reply
KBCsMommy 09:07 AM 12-15-2011
DCG is lying she did it at home. I had a similiar incident with 2 dcb's who were brothers. Big brother cut little brothers hair at home the nite before I noticed it.

Mom swore it could not have happend at home her children were not allowed to have scissors and she had combed little boys hair that morning and didnt notice.

Little boys hair was not combed it was a rats nest in the back. Mom was lying.

I looked everywhere there was no chunks of hair anywhere, no hair on little boy. And we hadnt used scissors in forever.

That nite big brother showed mom where he hid the chunks of hair!!

Kids who are old enough wont admit anything that could possibly get them in trouble. And if they can blame it on someone else to get out of trouble they will!!
Reply
wdmmom 09:11 AM 12-15-2011
I would laugh it off. I don't have time for games when it comes to my clients.

If there were an issue than it should have been brought up at the moment or day that it happened...not 3 weeks later.

My response would have been, "(Chuckle), Grandma, you know that didn't happen here. I wouldn't allow for something like that to take place. When the kids do have scissors, it's rare and I'm over the kids like a hawk supervising."

She wants to discredit me to not watching the children after that, she can have the boot!
Reply
Blackcat31 11:27 AM 12-15-2011
Originally Posted by wdmmom:
I would laugh it off. I don't have time for games when it comes to my clients.

If there were an issue than it should have been brought up at the moment or day that it happened...not 3 weeks later.

My response would have been, "(Chuckle), Grandma, you know that didn't happen here. I wouldn't allow for something like that to take place. When the kids do have scissors, it's rare and I'm over the kids like a hawk supervising."

She wants to discredit me to not watching the children after that, she can have the boot!
like!
Reply
MsMe 01:11 PM 12-15-2011
I had a DCM come in one day all worked up to show me a bruise her DCG had 'gotten at daycare' and when she told me the kid responsible...and I told her it wasnt possible (that child was part time and hadnt been at DC that day) DCG (6) went pale and started crying that she had made the whole thing up.

This daycare mom is very outspoken and I can imagine was ALL worked up and loud about the story while her daughter had her fooled.

This really worried me bc what other lies could the children make up? I have in my 8 years had two (this girl included) DCK that were 'story tellers' and ofcourse they both had parents that thought their childs word was law. . .

I hope this girl fesses up...and that she doesn't coem up with anymore stories.
Reply
Zoe 04:22 PM 12-15-2011
Originally Posted by MsMe:
I had a DCM come in one day all worked up to show me a bruise her DCG had 'gotten at daycare' and when she told me the kid responsible...and I told her it wasnt possible (that child was part time and hadnt been at DC that day) DCG (6) went pale and started crying that she had made the whole thing up.

This daycare mom is very outspoken and I can imagine was ALL worked up and loud about the story while her daughter had her fooled.

This really worried me bc what other lies could the children make up? I have in my 8 years had two (this girl included) DCK that were 'story tellers' and ofcourse they both had parents that thought their childs word was law. . .

I hope this girl fesses up...and that she doesn't coem up with anymore stories.

Did that mom ever apologize to you MsMe? I would be standing there with an eyebrow raised just staring at dcm after dcg broke down and confessed. Not cool.
Reply
daycare 04:34 PM 12-15-2011
I would be calling out DCG in front of grandma.... then when the confession comes in tell her how her lies got YOUR sons into big trouble.

I did this in the past and the child could not continue the lie when was confronted by me in front of the parents...or in this case gma
Reply
MNmamaOf4 08:01 AM 12-16-2011
I updated my post last night. Just as I suspected DCG was lying. Read my original post for the update!
Reply
Tags:custody, grandparents, lying
Reply Up