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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Honestly Why Are People Rude?
lovemykidstoo 05:45 AM 12-07-2018
My full timer, comes in every morning and dad puts her coat on my little table by the door. I always have some sort of decoration on there. Right now it's my snowman and a little sign. I mean does anyone think this is rude? As soon as he does it, I take it off and put it on one of the 2 doorknobs that i have right there. To the right is a closet and to the left is the basement, so there are doorknobs there. There may be another coat on them, but you can always double it up. I would never dream of putting a coat on someone's decorations. Do I just need a vacation or is this rude? So now this weekend, I'm going to get one of those over the door hangers and that way I can put it up in the morning and take it down and tuck it in the closet when they leave. Here are 2 pics, one of what it normally looks like and the other is what dad does every morning.
Attached: coat.jpg (29.1 KB) aftercoat.jpg (42.2 KB) 
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Snowmom 06:05 AM 12-07-2018
Yea, that doesn't look like a coat hanger.
He probably knocked down the sign doing that and if he scratched the wood table- that'd tick me off.
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lovemykidstoo 06:14 AM 12-07-2018
Originally Posted by Snowmom:
Yea, that doesn't look like a coat hanger.
He probably knocked down the sign doing that and if he scratched the wood table- that'd tick me off.
I just don't get it. I have 2 doorknobs right there. Same distance away. I mean anyone ever heard of putting 1 coat over another on the doorknob? grrrr

This is only $7.00. I think I will pick it up tonight. It has 6 hooks, just enough for all the kids. Then I can take it down at 5:15 and keep it in the closet.
Attached: hanger.jpg (131.6 KB) 
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Blackcat31 06:14 AM 12-07-2018
It's rude.

I have similar issues with standing on benches with fabric cushions and kids being sat on TOP of my cubby units. I have a laminated sign that says "Please do NOT place your child on top the cubbys. Thank you!"

Most parents can't read it though because their child's butt is blocking it from view.

In your case, I'd have a hard time not putting something on the table that will spill over and make a huge racket when DCD puts the coat on it. Something like a tall container full of little bells or acorns or Christmas tree bulbs etc... something so that the minute DCD sets the coat on the table it falls all over the place.

Then I'd stand there and say "That's why I've asked you not to put her coat there Bob. Could you please make sure that is picked up before the another child arrives? Thank you"


I do agree.... people can be obliviously rude sometimes.
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rosieteddy 06:31 AM 12-07-2018
I think that is the hardest part of having a family daycare.This is your home,its rude to put the coat there.I am surprised that the children are not touching the decorations.That being said I would move the table.I would get a coat rack and put it there for daycare hours.I would put a tray for wet boots in that space.I did like the idea Black cat had of the noisy ornaments though.Why make yourself aggravated every morning .We know the parents are ofted clueless.
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lovemykidstoo 06:36 AM 12-07-2018
Originally Posted by rosieteddy:
I think that is the hardest part of having a family daycare.This is your home,its rude to put the coat there.I am surprised that the children are not touching the decorations.That being said I would move the table.I would get a coat rack and put it there for daycare hours.I would put a tray for wet boots in that space.I did like the idea Black cat had of the noisy ornaments though.Why make yourself aggravated every morning .We know the parents are ofted clueless.
I'm not moving the table. This is my home and I'm not rearranging anything because he's rude. Plus, I use that table for daycare. It has 6 baskets in it that you can't see and that's where every child has their diapers and wipes. I'm going to pick up the over the door rack with 6 hooks to put on the closet door which is right there. There will be no need for him to put the coat on there anymore. So when he comes Monday and starts to put it on the table, I'm going to say "Oh, I bought a door hook right here. Coats were scratching my table." That way the problem is fixed and he understands that he was being rude. Surprisingly, the kids have never bothered any of my decorations or my tree. I have had 2 broken ornaments in 18 years of daycare. It's weird, they look, but they never touch.
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Blackcat31 06:41 AM 12-07-2018
Originally Posted by lovemykidstoo:
I'm not moving the table. This is my home and I'm not rearranging anything because he's rude. Plus, I use that table for daycare. It has 6 baskets in it that you can't see and that's where every child has their diapers and wipes. I'm going to pick up the over the door rack with 6 hooks to put on the closet door which is right there. There will be no need for him to put the coat on there anymore. So when he comes Monday and starts to put it on the table, I'm going to say "Oh, I bought a door hook right here. Coats were scratching my table." That way the problem is fixed and he understands that he was being rude. Surprisingly, the kids have never bothered any of my decorations or my tree. I have had 2 broken ornaments in 18 years of daycare. It's weird, they look, but they never touch.
Every year I put up decorations in the daycare house and the kids and I talk about looking and not touching etc etc.... Im happy to say the kids are fantastic!!!

But then it never fails, ever year I have that one parent that will pick up their kid and say "See how pretty" as they are holding them up high 3 inches from the ornament or lights I just spent the week teaching them not to touch.
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lovemykidstoo 06:34 AM 12-07-2018
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
It's rude.

I have similar issues with standing on benches with fabric cushions and kids being sat on TOP of my cubby units. I have a laminated sign that says "Please do NOT place your child on top the cubbys. Thank you!"

Most parents can't read it though because their child's butt is blocking it from view.

In your case, I'd have a hard time not putting something on the table that will spill over and make a huge racket when DCD puts the coat on it. Something like a tall container full of little bells or acorns or Christmas tree bulbs etc... something so that the minute DCD sets the coat on the table it falls all over the place.

Then I'd stand there and say "That's why I've asked you not to put her coat there Bob. Could you please make sure that is picked up before the another child arrives? Thank you"


I do agree.... people can be obliviously rude sometimes.

Maybe put up tack strips? hahahaha! I like the idea of putting stuff up there that woudl fall and make a mess. Would be fun to watch him on his hands and knees picking stuff up haha
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Unregistered 06:39 AM 12-07-2018
Yep...same crap here!! I have a shelf for kids back packs...sign on that please do not place children here...nope every damn day mom puts kid there to remove boots...there is a bench 19" away...I measured it!!
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lovemykidstoo 06:43 AM 12-07-2018
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
Yep...same crap here!! I have a shelf for kids back packs...sign on that please do not place children here...nope every damn day mom puts kid there to remove boots...there is a bench 19" away...I measured it!!
ugh that would tick me off.
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rosieteddy 06:45 AM 12-07-2018
Sorry I did not notice the baskets.The coat rack sounds like the perfect solution.I know parents can sometimes not get that this is your home.
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flying_babyb 06:30 PM 12-08-2018
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
It's rude.

I have similar issues with standing on benches with fabric cushions and kids being sat on TOP of my cubby units. I have a laminated sign that says "Please do NOT place your child on top the cubbys. Thank you!"
Double sided stick tape on the top, when child sticks you can say "Oh sorry mom/dad. I put some tape up there to keep x (spiders, ants, cat) off"
or try covering the top in decor that would require them to move the items before they sat their child up there. Decorative fence anyone?
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knoxmomof2 01:29 AM 12-09-2018
Ugh! I once had a Mom who would bring her child in and set her on top of a bookcase I had. It was just one of those short, cheap 3 shelf ones. I was too new to have a backbone, so I kept waiting for the day the top caved in... Lol... Eventually I just started storing things on it. I didn't get the nerve of her doing that. Who just sits a child on someone's bookcase?!

If I didn't see where to put something, I would ask where someone wanted it, not toss it on a surface that's clearly in use. Glad you found a solution 👍
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dreamer 11:12 AM 12-09-2018
He walks PAST the coat rack and puts the coat on top of your decor?

RUDE and also VERY WEIRD!
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Blackcat31 06:32 AM 12-10-2018
Originally Posted by flying_babyb:
Double sided stick tape on the top, when child sticks you can say "Oh sorry mom/dad. I put some tape up there to keep x (spiders, ants, cat) off"
or try covering the top in decor that would require them to move the items before they sat their child up there. Decorative fence anyone?
There is a clip board, tissues and hand sanitizer sitting on the laminated sign. The parent that is most habitual offender doesn't drop off any longer but when they did, they just brushed the items aside and sat their kid directly on the sign.

I finally told him to knock it off but there were several times before and after I addressed it that I know it happened but I didn't see it.

My cubby room is completely separate and it's hard to see into the main area of the house unless you are standing right at the entrance so I didn't see him sitting his kid there until after when other parents or kids told me.

Thankfully, this parent no longer drops off or picks up.
Attached: thumbnail_IMG_2261.jpg (92.8 KB) 
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lovemykidstoo 08:05 AM 12-10-2018
Drop off this morning was smooth as silk. Hung the coat right up on the hook!
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ColorfulSunburst 10:44 AM 12-07-2018
Originally Posted by Snowmom:
Yea, that doesn't look like a coat hanger.
my question is: are there coat hangers for DC kids?
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lovemykidstoo 11:27 AM 12-07-2018
Originally Posted by ColorfulSunburst:
my question is: are there coat hangers for DC kids?
I'm attaching the picture again of my entry way. You can see in the picture that the door to your right is the front door. The door that the new rack is on is a closet, I am standing in a hallway. Immediately to the left is the door that goes to the basement (so opposite the closet door). When you come in the front door and walk straight 3 feet, you're in my living room. As you can see really no place for coat hooks, so everyone has always just put the coats on the door knobs. It's worked perfectly fine for 3 years with everyone. never had any problem at all. Until this week for some reason he thinks he should put his daughters coat on my decorations.
Attached: newcoatrack.jpg (50.2 KB) 
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Ariana 11:43 AM 12-07-2018
Maybe I am weird but I would say something like “my goodness john your destroying my knickknacks with this coat every day” or “there must room on one of the hooks for this coat” or some other joking thing to get him to realize what the heck he is doing. I find people like this need it spelled out for them.
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lovemykidstoo 11:52 AM 12-07-2018
Originally Posted by Ariana:
Maybe I am weird but I would say something like “my goodness john your destroying my knickknacks with this coat every day” or “there must room on one of the hooks for this coat” or some other joking thing to get him to realize what the heck he is doing. I find people like this need it spelled out for them.
Now that I put the hooks over the door I absolutely will. He's been bringing her here 2 years now and this is the first week he's been putting the coat on my things, so I don't know why he started doing that. Now he has no excuse though since I do have the hooks and if he does it after that then I will absolutely say something.
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Tin Blues 11:59 AM 12-07-2018
Would you have had room for a child size coat rack? This would allow the kids to hang it up and get it down by themselves.
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Snowmom 03:55 PM 12-07-2018
Originally Posted by lovemykidstoo:
I'm attaching the picture again of my entry way. You can see in the picture that the door to your right is the front door. The door that the new rack is on is a closet, I am standing in a hallway. Immediately to the left is the door that goes to the basement (so opposite the closet door). When you come in the front door and walk straight 3 feet, you're in my living room. As you can see really no place for coat hooks, so everyone has always just put the coats on the door knobs. It's worked perfectly fine for 3 years with everyone. never had any problem at all. Until this week for some reason he thinks he should put his daughters coat on my decorations.
Is your front door metal?

I have these super strong magnet hooks on my door and they work FABULOUSLY. I keep them slightly higher up out of reach and they hold heavy coats (even mine).
Plus, you can remove them for weekends!
https://smile.amazon.com/gp/product/...?ie=UTF8&psc=1
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jenboo 05:45 PM 12-07-2018
Originally Posted by Snowmom:
Is your front door metal?

I have these super strong magnet hooks on my door and they work FABULOUSLY. I keep them slightly higher up out of reach and they hold heavy coats (even mine).
Plus, you can remove them for weekends!
https://smile.amazon.com/gp/product/...?ie=UTF8&psc=1
Oh those are really neat!!
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lovemykidstoo 07:45 PM 12-07-2018
Originally Posted by Snowmom:
Is your front door metal?

I have these super strong magnet hooks on my door and they work FABULOUSLY. I keep them slightly higher up out of reach and they hold heavy coats (even mine).
Plus, you can remove them for weekends!
https://smile.amazon.com/gp/product/...?ie=UTF8&psc=1
Wow those are cool. It's a wood door though The over the door one worked good today. I showed the dad in question here where his daughters coat was at pick up. I said my husband saw this at the store and thought I could use it to be organized. He said oh that's nice, so I think problem solved. Only $8 too on the clearance rack!
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sahm1225 06:06 AM 12-07-2018
That is very rude, but I’m having one of those weeks where everyone has been rude or inconsiderate that maybe I’m over exaggerating. But I think at this point, you need to be direct andask him NOT to do that. Some people are just jerks and don’t think things through. I have a dcd that throws the kids coats on TOP of the coat rack... and another one that I have to say ‘please CLOSE the door” every morning.
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lovemykidstoo 06:09 AM 12-07-2018
Originally Posted by sahm1225:
That is very rude, but I’m having one of those weeks where everyone has been rude or inconsiderate that maybe I’m over exaggerating. But I think at this point, you need to be direct andask him NOT to do that. Some people are just jerks and don’t think things through. I have a dcd that throws the kids coats on TOP of the coat rack... and another one that I have to say ‘please CLOSE the door” every morning.
Oh Lord me too. I have a screen door where the top is a screen, but it has built in the storm that slides up to shut off the screen. (if that makes sense). I leave the screen open about 4 inches because if I don't, the big door doesn't close easily. Too much suction. So they come in every day and stand there flapping. I walk right around them and say excuse me and shut the door lol. I mean duh. You wonder why the kids don't listen? The parents aren't too swift.
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e.j. 09:07 AM 12-07-2018
Originally Posted by lovemykidstoo:
My full timer, comes in every morning and dad puts her coat on my little table by the door. I always have some sort of decoration on there. Right now it's my snowman and a little sign. I mean does anyone think this is rude? As soon as he does it, I take it off and put it on one of the 2 doorknobs that i have right there. To the right is a closet and to the left is the basement, so there are doorknobs there. There may be another coat on them, but you can always double it up. I would never dream of putting a coat on someone's decorations. Do I just need a vacation or is this rude?
He's definitely being rude - although I'm sure you could use a vacation. Can't we all? ;-)

My dd makes various crafts and often will go to craft fairs to sell them. She puts time, effort and money into making her crafts. Last weekend, I went with her to help out. She had set up a display of hair bows made out of ribbons. An older woman came by and bought some of the earrings she had made. In order to get to her wallet, though, the woman laid her purse down right on top of the bows, squashing them all. I was proud of my dd for remaining polite and professional but she was so angry - and rightfully so! Some people are just so oblivious!

I like your idea of the hanging coat rack that can be put away when you're not doing day care. Hopefully, it will solve the problem for you.
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lovemykidstoo 09:22 AM 12-07-2018
Originally Posted by e.j.:
He's definitely being rude - although I'm sure you could use a vacation. Can't we all? ;-)

My dd makes various crafts and often will go to craft fairs to sell them. She puts time, effort and money into making her crafts. Last weekend, I went with her to help out. She had set up a display of hair bows made out of ribbons. An older woman came by and bought some of the earrings she had made. In order to get to her wallet, though, the woman laid her purse down right on top of the bows, squashing them all. I was proud of my dd for remaining polite and professional but she was so angry - and rightfully so! Some people are just so oblivious!

I like your idea of the hanging coat rack that can be put away when you're not doing day care. Hopefully, it will solve the problem for you.
That's terrible about the bows.
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lovemykidstoo 09:24 AM 12-07-2018
Really if he would have just asked it wouldn't have been so bad but to continuously do it I think is rude. Plus, at the end of the day he takes the coat off the door knob where I put it after we go outside, so it's not like he can't see that that is where I keep it and see other kids' coats too, but for $8 I solved the problem. My husband ran to the store this morning and bought this hook for me. Much better all the way around.
Attached: newcoatrack.jpg (50.2 KB) 
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Rockgirl 11:55 AM 12-07-2018
The coat rack looks like a perfect solution. Next week you can just silently point to it as he walks through the door.
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lovemykidstoo 12:05 PM 12-07-2018
Originally Posted by Rockgirl:
The coat rack looks like a perfect solution. Next week you can just silently point to it as he walks through the door.
Exactly. Hopefully he'll get the picture tonight when he has to take his daughters coat off of it and of course I"ll add a comment or two about my nice new coat rack lol
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Tags:expectations, social skills
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