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Bookworm 05:19 PM 06-18-2014
My DD had a discussion in her Sociology class a this morning about should kids be banned from restaurants or other businesses. After the discussion the Professer gave an assignment where they have to ask 20 people their opinion. If you care to respond please list your age, gender, marital status, if you have children or not, and your children's ages. Then state your reason for your response.

This is for research purposes only, not to start a flame war. Your "names" will not be used at all. Thank you ladies for your help.
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sharlan 05:31 PM 06-18-2014
Yes and no.

Yes - I think really exclusive ($$$$$) restaurants should be allowed to ban children during evening dinner hours. Reasoning - People enjoying that level of luxury don't want to listen to an infant screaming or other children acting out.

No - Children need to be taken out in public in order for them to learn how to behave. Children learn from experience.

60
F
married
2 children, 35 and 37

I think maybe restaurants can have a children/nonchildren seating areas like they used to with smoking and nonsmoking.
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CraftyMom 05:45 PM 06-18-2014
No children should not be banned. They should however be expected to behave appropriately and if they cannot then they shouldn't be there. But not banned.

37
F
Married
3 kids, ages 13, 6 and3
Reply
KiddieCahoots 05:47 PM 06-18-2014
age - 46yrs.
gender - female
marital status - married
children's ages - 28yrs female, 25yrs female, 23yrs female, 14yrs female, 5yrs male.

I feel with the vast differences one choses to raise their child in todays society, it should be left up to the business owner, whether a child be banned from that particular business or not, without consequences of law action. Then left to the public to decide if they will respect that businesses wishes and comply or not.
As it is up to a bride and groom to decide whether children can attend or not, depicting the atmosphere of the wedding.
Or.....a gun or antique glass store not being suitable for a child, vs. a toy store being optimal.
I for one, even loving that I work with children, am never happy to hear an uncontrollable child, screaming and ruining the serenity, in the booth next to me at a restaurant.
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craftymissbeth 06:00 PM 06-18-2014
29 years old
Female
Separated
One 7 yo son

I will start this out by saying that, yes, I feel that restaurants should be able to disallow children. I've seen the way this generation is being raised and too many children are simply not taught how to behave properly in public.

However, I wonder where the line of discrimination falls. If we can ban those under a certain age then what keeps us from banning those over a certain age, as well? I feel that asking a disruptive family to remove themselves from the restaurant is a far better compromise than never allowing them. As for the more expensive, fancier restaurants, I believe that most children, if taught properly, would absolutely be able to behave. Unfortunately, many parents don't see the importance in appropriate behavior in public.
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jenboo 06:05 PM 06-18-2014
Age- 23
Gender- f
Status- married
No children yet

I think that restaurants should be allowed to ban children, or at least have the right to ask them to leave if they are out of control.

I think it is sad but true. Many parents don't parent anymore. They let their kids run wild! Or the kids never go out in public and don't know how to behave in public.
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Bookworm 06:23 PM 06-18-2014
Thanks ladies. Keep 'em coming. She needs 10 more. Is it alright to print the thread?
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midaycare 06:27 PM 06-18-2014
Age - 37
Gender - Female
Married
1 6 yo son

Yes, restaurants should be able to ban kids. It should be up to the business owner, and parents will take their money elsewhere. Parents can speak with their wallet.
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SilverSabre25 06:31 PM 06-18-2014
28
Female
Married
2 children, ages 6.5 and 3

It's NOT a black and white issue. Simply put I think that some restaurants should be allowed to ban some of the children some of the time. Isn't that helpful? Haha. But parents also need to be held responsible for teaching their child appropriate behavior and leaving if the child's behavior falls below that which is acceptable for the given environment they are in. That means that the hungry 2 year old at Steak and Shake for lunch at 11:30 AM on a Sunday (at S&S kids eat free on the weekends) is perfectly allowed to be there making noise but when he gets too loud the mother needs to get control or remove him. And that means that the 6 year old who is supposed to sit through dinner at a $100/head steak restaurant that doesn't even HAVE ketchup let alone chicken fingers had better be capable of doing so without an electronic device or putting up a fuss or HER parents need to hire a babysitter--which they darn well better be able to afford if they are eating there. There are 3 year olds who could manage perfectly well in a top of the line restaurant at 8 PM...and there are 10 year olds who have no business going anywhere that's not McDonalds. There IS no one right answer because every child is different.
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NoMoreJuice! 06:31 PM 06-18-2014
Age: 29
Gender: F
Marital Status: Married
Children: No

I absolutely would frequent restaurants that banned children under 16. I love kids, but there are so many times that I just want to enjoy adult company without hearing a child wailing in the background. It would be ridiculous (not to mention financially crippling to the restaurants) to impose a county/city child ban in restaurants, but I would be very happy to enjoy a meal at a restaurant that chose to ban children.
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Heidi 06:33 PM 06-18-2014
I believe that a business shou'd be able to ban children, maybe under a certain age (like under 5).

At the very least, they should be able to ask someone who is disruptive to leave. Too often, I've been in a "nice" restaurant, paid a hefty sum for a dinner, and spent at least some of the meal listening to a toddler yell. Even a "happy" scream is annoying when you finally get out alone.

Too many people now-a-days do not know how or try to keep their kiddos quiet when it is expected..

49, female

4 children, ages 24,22,17, and 13
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Laurel 06:34 PM 06-18-2014
No, it is not necessary to ban children. The management has always had authority to ask anyone to leave for unacceptable behavior so it should stay as it is. Anyone of any age should be asked to leave if they are causing trouble but specifically banning children because they are children seems wrong to me. I doubt it is good for business either.

Age: 62
Gender: F
Marital status: Married
Children: Grown ages 40,36 and 33
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Little Buttons 06:46 PM 06-18-2014
28
Female
Married
Son age 17 months

I do not like banning/discrimination. It is a tricky dangerous slippery slope. With that being said I absolutely think parents need to either hire a sitter, teach their children how to behave properly or promptly remove them once they become a disturbance! I also would support the idea of a restaurant asking for the parent to remove an unruly child.

I feel as though if you are going to bring your child to an adult fuction or environment they had better have the maturity to act like an adult. I believe an establishment is well within their rights to expect certain proper behavior from everyone reguardless of age and if proper behavior is not being shown they should be asked to leave, once again reguardless of age.
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LysesKids 07:00 PM 06-18-2014
Originally Posted by KiddieCahoots:
age - 46yrs.
gender - female
marital status - married
children's ages - 28yrs female, 25yrs female, 23yrs female, 14yrs female, 5yrs male.

I feel with the vast differences one choses to raise their child in todays society, it should be left up to the business owner, whether a child be banned from that particular business or not, without consequences of law action. Then left to the public to decide if they will respect that businesses wishes and comply or not.
As it is up to a bride and groom to decide whether children can attend or not, depicting the atmosphere of the wedding.
Or.....a gun or antique glass store not being suitable for a child, vs. a toy store being optimal.
I for one, even loving that I work with children, am never happy to hear an uncontrollable child, screaming and ruining the serenity, in the booth next to me at a restaurant.
I agree… I purposely go to finer restaurants for the food and atmosphere, the last thing I want to hear is an unruly child. Can't wait to go to a family wedding in August that is 18+ only

Age 53, widowed, but dating
4 kids age 32.5, 29, 27 & almost 22
4 grands, 12, 10, 9, and almost 2 (they go nowhere but fast food because my dd didn't train them as i trained her)
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sahm1225 07:19 PM 06-18-2014
33 female
Married
3 kids - 2,4,6

I say no to the banning, but I think restaurants should have a children friendly time frame (and say, no kids after 9pm). My dad owns a restaurant so we go out to eat often and my kids now how to behave (or we would leave). I work w kids all day, I have zero patience for unruly kids after hours at a restaurant. I also think that restaurant owners should ask families to leave if they are unable to control their kids. When we were on vacation in Alabama, there was a restaurant/country club that had a sign with times that were 'child friendly'. I thought that was cool.

I have a short story for you - we were once at red lobster waiting to be seated. My kids were 1,3 & 5. My 3&5 year old were looking at the lobster tank and I was next to them w my 1 year old in my arms. A child around the age of 6-7 came up to my ds5 and yelled in his face. I looked around and realize there's no parents around. He then runs up to my dd3 and yells/growls at her and pushes her down. My dd3 quickly gets up and pushes him back. This happens in about 30 seconds and I'm right there gathering my kids and looking for the kid's parent. He comes up to me and reaches up to punch my dd1 (keep in mind, she's a tiny 1 year old about 14lbs). I intercept the punch and hold his hand. The manager rushes over and takes the child. They walked around the ENTiRE restaurant before finding the parents! They were all the way at the back of the restaurant enjoying their dinner. THAT family should be banned from the restaurant. We left and haven't been back since.
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Heidi 07:26 PM 06-18-2014
Originally Posted by sahm1225:
33 female
Married
3 kids - 2,4,6

I say no to the banning, but I think restaurants should have a children friendly time frame (and say, no kids after 9pm). My dad owns a restaurant so we go out to eat often and my kids now how to behave (or we would leave). I work w kids all day, I have zero patience for unruly kids after hours at a restaurant. I also think that restaurant owners should ask families to leave if they are unable to control their kids. When we were on vacation in Alabama, there was a restaurant/country club that had a sign with times that were 'child friendly'. I thought that was cool.

I have a short story for you - we were once at red lobster waiting to be seated. My kids were 1,3 & 5. My 3&5 year old were looking at the lobster tank and I was next to them w my 1 year old in my arms. A child around the age of 6-7 came up to my ds5 and yelled in his face. I looked around and realize there's no parents around. He then runs up to my dd3 and yells/growls at her and pushes her down. My dd3 quickly gets up and pushes him back. This happens in about 30 seconds and I'm right there gathering my kids and looking for the kid's parent. He comes up to me and reaches up to punch my dd1 (keep in mind, she's a tiny 1 year old about 14lbs). I intercept the punch and hold his hand. The manager rushes over and takes the child. They walked around the ENTiRE restaurant before finding the parents! They were all the way at the back of the restaurant enjoying their dinner. THAT family should be banned from the restaurant. We left and haven't been back since.
not being confrontational, but I wonder why?
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spinnymarie 07:37 PM 06-18-2014
ge, gender, marital status, if you have children or not, and your children's ages. Then state your reason for your response.

Age: 30
Gender: F
Marital Status: Married
Children: Yes, 5 yrs, 3 yrs, 2 yrs

No restaurants should not be allowed to ban children. Children are people. I would appreciate a restaurant that banned people that walk too slowly and talk too loudly and hate children, but that's life so if I want to go out in public, I deal with it. As PPs have said, management ALWAYS has the right to ask people to leave that are being disruptive, children included. Maybe it would be helpful if more management would step up and do so. But banning children outright, even only some of the time, is discriminatory. I also think that people could go to a bar - a place that is legally and purposefully NOT for children, if they want to be away from children. And bars could and should not allow any one under 21 - including 2 yr olds.
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sahm1225 07:38 PM 06-18-2014
Originally Posted by Heidi:
not being confrontational, but I wonder why?
The manager took the kid to the parents. Then while we were still Waiting to be seated, the kid ran back go again towards the lobster tank. He started screaming and jumping again yelling at my kids and other kids looking at the tank. The parents were still nowhere to be seen and the manager did nothing.

I'm not saying I won't ever go back to the restaurant, but I won't go back to that one.

I just felt that they (the restaurant manager) saw that the child was being aggressive towards other guest and the parents had no intention of controlling their child. They should've asked the family to leave or tell them
To control their child. What if the child ran out to the street & for hit by a car? Or jumped into the lobster tank?
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Bookworm 07:50 PM 06-18-2014
DD thanks all of you for helping. Including non-forum responses, she has 28 but,if you want to chime in please feel free. I won't let her use my opinion so I will share with you.

Like some of you, when I go to a restaurant, I don't want to hear screaming kids. There a few restaurants that sit families on one side and singles on the other. I don't want to deal with Susie walking table to table asking to taste food. But my main pet peeve is kids at the movie. Unless it's a children's movie they shouldn't be there. I can't tell you how many times I've been in pg/pg13/r rated movies where there were kids under 5 screaming/crying through part of the movie. The parents usually have to be put out because they don't think there's a problem. If you don't have a sitter, then wait for the DVD.

As far as a ban on kids, I think restaurants and other business should be able to ban kids. They also should be ready to deal with the fallout from. Like Silver said, it's not a black/white issue.

42
Married
F
Dd-22
Reply
TwinKristi 08:43 PM 06-18-2014
Originally Posted by Bookworm:
My DD had a discussion in her Sociology class a this morning about should kids be banned from restaurants or other businesses. After the discussion the Professer gave an assignment where they have to ask 20 people their opinion. If you care to respond please list your age, gender, marital status, if you have children or not, and your children's ages. Then state your reason for your response.

This is for research purposes only, not to start a flame war. Your "names" will not be used at all. Thank you ladies for your help.
33
F
Married
Yes
6 boys 17,17,12,10,8,2

Yes I think some restaurants should be able to not allow children but I think there should be some type of exemption they have to file with a valid reason, like walkway clearance for high chairs, primarily alcohol served, high dollar "fancy" type place, etc. Or perhaps have a family zone?
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Aussiedaycare 11:16 PM 06-18-2014
I like what a lot of restaurants do here. Children are allowed before 8.30pm when it hits 8.30pm children 13 and under are asked to leave the premises.

35
Female
Single
My children 15 (F) 13 (M) 9 (M) 8 (M)
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pandamom 11:53 PM 06-18-2014
31
Female
Married
Twin 4 year old boys

We just started taking our sons to restaurants. We did a bit when they were infants because all they did was sleep in their carseats And being in Europe, there were always helpful wait staff (male and female) who were more than happy to hold twin infants.

Now that we are taking them, we choose very family friendly ones. Ones with outdoor seating and an outdoor playground. I've found restaurants run my Italian families are very child friendly- the family's own kids play through the restaurant. If my kids get antsy or tantrummy, we have no issues with getting our food packed up to go and finish our meal at home.

I don't agree with restaurants banning children. However I think parents need to show discretion on if an eating establishment is appropriate for the ages of their children.
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Laurel 02:59 AM 06-19-2014
Originally Posted by sahm1225:
The manager took the kid to the parents. Then while we were still Waiting to be seated, the kid ran back go again towards the lobster tank. He started screaming and jumping again yelling at my kids and other kids looking at the tank. The parents were still nowhere to be seen and the manager did nothing.

I'm not saying I won't ever go back to the restaurant, but I won't go back to that one.

I just felt that they (the restaurant manager) saw that the child was being aggressive towards other guest and the parents had no intention of controlling their child. They should've asked the family to leave or tell them
To control their child. What if the child ran out to the street & for hit by a car? Or jumped into the lobster tank?
In that case I would have written a letter to the corporate office and found out the manager's name to put in the letter. I've had a lot of luck writing 'corporate' about various things. Once, we got a car repair bill cut in half by a Ford dealer because of bad service plus the manager called up and apologized. Usually major chain stores' corporate offices want to know so they can correct the problem and keep their good reputation. Even when it's not their fault. I got some Dannon yogurt coupons for free yogurt after I opened a yogurt that had mold. I do agree with Dannon that it was handled/stored wrong by the store and didn't leave their factory that way. I have seen out of date things at that store so stopped shopping there. Still, they backed their good name by making me happy.

Laurel
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SunshineMama 04:11 AM 06-19-2014
Originally Posted by Bookworm:
My DD had a discussion in her Sociology class a this morning about should kids be banned from restaurants or other businesses. After the discussion the Professer gave an assignment where they have to ask 20 people their opinion. If you care to respond please list your age, gender, marital status, if you have children or not, and your children's ages. Then state your reason for your response.

This is for research purposes only, not to start a flame war. Your "names" will not be used at all. Thank you ladies for your help.
Age 31
Female
Married

Kids should absolutely not be banned from restaurants. Kids are people too. Look into other countries, and see how children are treated- in the US, we often see them as a nuisance.

I DO think parents have a responsibility to "think" about where they take their kids. I took my girls with us once to a $30/plate 3 hour dinner and they were fine. I actually had other patrons comment on how thankful they were that the children were so well behaved, bc they were worried that their mom's night out was going to be ruined by them. (I dislike being around crying children when I FINALLY get a girls night out and I have to listen to someone else's child).

I'd never take my son to a restaurant like that, however, bc I know he will act up.

It's on the parents, but I'd boycott a restaurant that disallowed children.
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KidGrind 04:27 AM 06-19-2014
YES! YES! YES! Ban the children from certain businesses!

Female
46 and menopausal
married
3 children 26, 11 & 10

It’s inappropriate for children to ruin the experience of paying customers. I wish we could just ban crying babies from movies and children of the corn from restaurants. When I pay for a meal, I can take a crying baby. I cannot take children seating at my table uninvited, straw spit balls hitting my table or just plan running around unsupervised. I cannot enjoy the movie I paid to see with a crying baby in the theater. Children should be banned from certain places because some parents are inconsiderate of others.
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melilley 04:28 AM 06-19-2014
Originally Posted by SunshineMama:

Kids should absolutely not be banned from restaurants. Kids are people too. Look into other countries, and see how children are treated- in the US, we often see them as a nuisance.

I DO think parents have a responsibility to "think" about where they take their kids. I took my girls with us once to a $30/plate 3 hour dinner and they were fine. I actually had other patrons comment on how thankful they were that the children were so well behaved, bc they were worried that their mom's night out was going to be ruined by them. (I dislike being around crying children when I FINALLY get a girls night out and I have to listen to someone else's child).

I'd never take my son to a restaurant like that, however, bc I know he will act up.

It's on the parents, but I'd boycott a restaurant that disallowed children.
I think the same thing. I also think that if a child is screaming and/or crying, or acting out, that parents should have common courtesy and take their child outside, like I do if my ds acts up; family restaurant or not.

35
Female
Married
11 year old dd
Almost 2 yo ds
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spud912 07:56 AM 06-19-2014
Government should have no say in how a business operates, unless it violates discrimination laws. If they choose to ban children, then so be it. I have no problems with a restaurant banning children. It's the same concept as cruises or resorts that are adult-only. If I want my children to eat/vacation with me, then I have plenty of alternatives I can choose.

Female
32
married
2 children - 5 and 3 with one more on the way
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KiddieCahoots 08:01 AM 06-19-2014
Originally Posted by SunshineMama:
Age 31
Female
Married

Kids should absolutely not be banned from restaurants. Kids are people too. Look into other countries, and see how children are treated- in the US, we often see them as a nuisance.

I DO think parents have a responsibility to "think" about where they take their kids. I took my girls with us once to a $30/plate 3 hour dinner and they were fine. I actually had other patrons comment on how thankful they were that the children were so well behaved, bc they were worried that their mom's night out was going to be ruined by them. (I dislike being around crying children when I FINALLY get a girls night out and I have to listen to someone else's child).

I'd never take my son to a restaurant like that, however, bc I know he will act up.

It's on the parents, but I'd boycott a restaurant that disallowed children.
I totally respect your opinion, am not saying this in a disrespectful way, and don't necessarily disagree with you completely.

It's not from responsible parents like you or I that teach our children before we bring them into public, that give us this topic to discuss.

The reason we can have this topic is because of children that misbehave in restaurants and businesses, as well as other places....ummm child care.....and the parents that will not take ANY responsibility or action, leaving it up to others to raise or deal with their inappropriately raised children. These are the children that become a nuisance.

Some of these parents feel entitled, are on some warped sense of reality with their ideas on how to raise a child, or are just plain ignorant, and have no intention to change. Thrusting their misbehaved children into the public for us all to grin and bare it? Oh, heck to the no!

I think it's a good start to give businesses the ok to escort these children and parents out the front door before banning children first, but this is compromised by our sue happy society.
Giving businesses the right to ban children would be a set boundary, that the public would just have to deal with, and either chose to use that business or not.
How's that saying go?.......All it takes is one, to ruin it for others.
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Unregistered 12:23 PM 06-19-2014
No I don't support a ban on children.
What next? Ban the elderly because they are bad tippers, ban the college age students because they are too loud, ban those attending a restaurant after church because they are too religious, ban same sex couples because they may offend someone, ban heterosexual couples because they may be dining with someone that isn't their spouse. Ban singles because they are taking up space that a two party table could be using... When do we stop?


TLEmother (not allowed to login from work)


Female
Single
43
1 child age 7
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Chellieleanne 01:57 PM 06-19-2014
I believe restaurants should have the right to choose to allow children or not. They should also be allowed to ask parties with disruptive children to leave and not face any consequences because of it. I hardly go out to eat but you can be sure my kids are behaving while we are there or I take them outside. However there are parents who do not control their children and whether my kids are with me or not, I am honestly annoyed. I keep my children behaved and they know even as young as they are that going out is a treat and if they dont listen they won't get to go the next time. Taking children out is the only way for them to learn acceptable behavior but the flip side is the parents who don't model and teach their children how to behave cause a lot of the negative stigma against those of us who do. We don't go to any fancy or super expensive restaurants because we have kids, even though they behave it just isn't the best atmosphere when the place is geared more towards adults. I say let restaurants ban kids, because they will be losing out on the money from the families that do go there and that is their loss. Other restaurants will step up to the plate and welcome families!


24
Female
Married
Kids
3 years old, almost 2 years old, one on the way
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Michael 02:23 PM 06-19-2014
No ban on children. I think parents are more understanding in restaurants. Its those that don't want to have children seem to be the ones that forget they were once children.
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Bookworm 02:24 PM 06-19-2014
Thank you for the additional comments and thank you for keeping it civil. I'll print them out for DD. I'm always amazed when the parent gets mad when they're kicked out like it's the restaurants fault little Billy and Sally tripped two servers because they were running around, poured out all the salt and pepper shakers at every empty table, and put their grubby little hands in some stranger's plate. Curse you restaurant for providing such temptation.
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Sugar Magnolia 07:39 PM 06-19-2014
No ban. It seems like discrimination to me.
"We reserve the right to refuse service"---perfectly fine.

Female
46
Married
19 and 10 year old children
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Tags:discrimination, parents - don't want kids, survey
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