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Parents and Guardians Forum>Incidents At Daycare - Recommendations Near Bothell, WA
smoka 05:13 PM 09-18-2014
My wife and I had a baby last December and considered several daycares in the Bothell area. My wife's mother runs a family daycare and we thought this was ideal both economically and felt that a daycare owner is more likely to care about her job than an employee at a franchise making close to minimum wage to babysit.

We enrolled our child at 6 months in a daycare near our home. She is now 9 months old, so she's been there about 3 months. The owner is probably in her 50's but gets help from a girl in her 20's. She seems very friendly (like my mother in law) and the only major downside was that English is her second language. We thought that would be okay since she will interact with people of different cultures and we can always enforce language/learning at home as long as she's in a loving environment.

In the past few months, we had several "incidents" that are making us reconsider this daycare:
1. Within the first month, there were a couple of incidents of major scratches. They were clearly not self-inflicted and the provider never even mentioned they happened (I'm not sure if she saw it happen and forgot to tell us or was too busy when it did happen).
2. One time I picked her up and found her salivating more than normal. After putting her in her car seat, I noticed that she was chewing on something. I opened her mouth and saw a piece of bark or wood from furniture! Again, it wasn't noted by the provider and she handed her to me with this in her mouth.
3. Today, we forgot her solids so I went around 2pm to drop them off. It was nap-time and there was one baby crying. As I walked in, the provider was getting the crying baby out of a closet. The baby was an infant in a car seat!

The first 2 points show that the provider was not watching the kids closely enough. Having been at the daycare with my mother-in-law, I know it's impossible to watch 6-7 kids with little or no help, but usually she knows if something does happen. Usually it's a kid falls and she gets them a Band-Aid. Kid scratches or pushes another kid and they get timeout until behavior is corrected, etc. However, the accidents are noted and remedied and later reported to the parents at time of pickup, which is all we expect. This does not seem to happen at this daycare and we end up finding this when we get home.

The 3rd point is just a bit scary since the closet had little or no ventilation. I'm not sure if she does this with our child if she gets fussy/cranky.

Does this sound like normal/expected behavior or should I look for another provider in the area? Any good recommendations on providers (preferably Bothell, WA but open to Kirkland/Bellevue)?
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TwinKristi 05:33 PM 09-18-2014
First, I have no recommendations but hopefully someone else does. I would try to contact your local referal and resources office to provide you with a list of licensed providers in your area. http://www.childcarenet.org/families/your-search
Second, is your current provider licensed? Did you get and call references? If she is licensed I would report her to licensing for the sleep thing. Here is the link to the licensing requirements for infant sleep. http://app.leg.wa.gov/WAC/default.as...=170-296A-7075

Do you have any friends in the area with a baby in childcare? Do you belong to any local Favebook parenting groups? Ask for personal references and word of mouth referrals. Infant care is hard to find but quality infant care is even harder. Look ove the state's recommendations and ask any potential provider what they do about sleep, fussy babies, direct supervision with a mixed age group.
Washington licensed childcare website
http://app.leg.wa.gov/WAC/default.aspx?cite=170-296A
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daniellesweety1 05:34 PM 09-18-2014
Originally Posted by smoka:
My wife and I had a baby last December and considered several daycares in the Bothell area. My wife's mother runs a family daycare and we thought this was ideal both economically and felt that a daycare owner is more likely to care about her job than an employee at a franchise making close to minimum wage to babysit.

We enrolled our child at 6 months in a daycare near our home. She is now 9 months old, so she's been there about 3 months. The owner is probably in her 50's but gets help from a girl in her 20's. She seems very friendly (like my mother in law) and the only major downside was that English is her second language. We thought that would be okay since she will interact with people of different cultures and we can always enforce language/learning at home as long as she's in a loving environment.

In the past few months, we had several "incidents" that are making us reconsider this daycare:
1. Within the first month, there were a couple of incidents of major scratches. They were clearly not self-inflicted and the provider never even mentioned they happened (I'm not sure if she saw it happen and forgot to tell us or was too busy when it did happen).
2. One time I picked her up and found her salivating more than normal. After putting her in her car seat, I noticed that she was chewing on something. I opened her mouth and saw a piece of bark or wood from furniture! Again, it wasn't noted by the provider and she handed her to me with this in her mouth.
3. Today, we forgot her solids so I went around 2pm to drop them off. It was nap-time and there was one baby crying. As I walked in, the provider was getting the crying baby out of a closet. The baby was an infant in a car seat!

The first 2 points show that the provider was not watching the kids closely enough. Having been at the daycare with my mother-in-law, I know it's impossible to watch 6-7 kids with little or no help, but usually she knows if something does happen. The 3rd point is just a bit scary since the closet had little or no ventilation. I'm not sure if she does this with our child if she gets fussy/cranky.

Does this sound like normal/expected behavior or should I look for another provider in the area? Any good recommendations on providers (preferably Bothell but open to Kirkland/Bellevue)?

I don't know anything about the area where you are looking for daycare, but I can tell you that I would immediately remove my child. The closet thing, heck no. I wouldn't be able to function during the day thinking she has my child in a closet. Also her chewing something would piss me off too. My daughter went to 3 daycares because I felt the care wasn't right. I waited until she was able to talk to even attend but I would catch little things happening that made me change centers. I would definitely remove my child from there asap.
Also, did she even say anything about it when you saw it or she just seem like its an everyday normal thing???
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NightOwl 05:36 PM 09-18-2014
Get your baby out NOW and call cps. Like, yesterday. The other baby was fastened in a car seat and IN A CLOSET?? This is not, not, NOT normal.

Do not take your child back there. The first two points? ehh. Stuff happens sometimes. No provider is perfect. The third point? Run and don't look back. But she must be reported. The other parents need to know their kids are being put into closets! She will be shut down for this kind of behavior.
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smoka 05:40 PM 09-18-2014
Originally Posted by TwinKristi:
First, I have no recommendations but hopefully someone else does. I would try to contact your local referal and resources office to provide you with a list of licensed providers in your area. http://www.childcarenet.org/families/your-search
Second, is your current provider licensed? Did you get and call references? If she is licensed I would report her to licensing for the sleep thing. Here is the link to the licensing requirements for infant sleep. http://app.leg.wa.gov/WAC/default.as...=170-296A-7075

Do you have any friends in the area with a baby in childcare? Do you belong to any local Favebook parenting groups? Ask for personal references and word of mouth referrals. Infant care is hard to find but quality infant care is even harder. Look ove the state's recommendations and ask any potential provider what they do about sleep, fussy babies, direct supervision with a mixed age group.
Washington licensed childcare website
http://app.leg.wa.gov/WAC/default.aspx?cite=170-296A
Yes, she is licensed. We went through the local office to find the local providers. We looked at several francized daycares which were organized and divided into age groups, but the employees looked like they were just getting by their day and either looked bored or pissed off that they're there!

My work blocks Yelp, which was going to be my next reference for parent feedback. I'm open to driving longer or expanding the daycare budget by 2x if it means getting her into a good environment. I'll ask some friends and facebook groups as well. Thanks for the recommendations.


Originally Posted by daniellesweety1:
I don't know anything about the area where you are looking for daycare, but I can tell you that I would immediately remove my child. The closet thing, heck no. I wouldn't be able to function during the day thinking she has my child in a closet. Also her chewing something would piss me off too. My daughter went to 3 daycares because I felt the care wasn't right. I waited until she was able to talk to even attend but I would catch little things happening that made me change centers. I would definitely remove my child from there asap.
Also, did she even say anything about it when you saw it or she just seem like its an everyday normal thing???
She seemed shocked when I walked in. I sometimes drop her off a little late (10:30am), but we usually don't come mid-day like that.

I didn't really want to sit there and discuss with her since it was nap-time, so I just dropped off the food and left. Now, maybe there was an explanation to the situation, but I did see a baby in a car seat being pulled out of a closet. My best explanation is she was trying to diffuse the sound so the other kids can sleep!

So do you have your child in a Family daycare or a big daycare center? If it's a daycare center, is it a national or local one?

Originally Posted by Wednesday:
Get your baby out NOW and call cps. Like, yesterday. The other baby was fastened in a car seat and IN A CLOSET?? This is not, not, NOT normal.

Do not take your child back there. The first two points? ehh. Stuff happens sometimes. No provider is perfect. The third point? Run and don't look back. But she must be reported. The other parents need to know their kids are being put into closets! She will be shut down for this kind of behavior.
I don't know if the baby was fastened. There was a car seat cover on. It didn't sound like my baby's cry though, which was *somewhat* assuring, but what I saw looked wrong.
Regarding the reporting, I would have to get more information from the provider and find an alternate daycare. Again, maybe there is an explanation.
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daniellesweety1 05:41 PM 09-18-2014
Originally Posted by wednesday:
get your baby out now and call cps. Like, yesterday. The other baby was fastened in a car seat and in a closet?? This is not, not, not normal.

Do not take your child back there. The first two points? Ehh. Stuff happens sometimes. No provider is perfect. The third point? Run and don't look back. But she must be reported. The other parents need to know their kids are being put into closets! She will be shut down for this kind of behavior.
exactly
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Heidi 06:15 PM 09-18-2014
Originally Posted by smoka:
Yes, she is licensed. We went through the local office to find the local providers. We looked at several francized daycares which were organized and divided into age groups, but the employees looked like they were just getting by their day and either looked bored or pissed off that they're there!

My work blocks Yelp, which was going to be my next reference for parent feedback. I'm open to driving longer or expanding the daycare budget by 2x if it means getting her into a good environment. I'll ask some friends and facebook groups as well. Thanks for the recommendations.




She seemed shocked when I walked in. I sometimes drop her off a little late (10:30am), but we usually don't come mid-day like that.

I didn't really want to sit there and discuss with her since it was nap-time, so I just dropped off the food and left. Now, maybe there was an explanation to the situation, but I did see a baby in a car seat being pulled out of a closet. My best explanation is she was trying to diffuse the sound so the other kids can sleep!

So do you have your child in a Family daycare or a big daycare center? If it's a daycare center, is it a national or local one?



I don't know if the baby was fastened. There was a car seat cover on. It didn't sound like my baby's cry though, which was *somewhat* assuring, but what I saw looked wrong.
Regarding the reporting, I would have to get more information from the provider and find an alternate daycare. Again, maybe there is an explanation.

There is really NO explanation for a baby being put in a closet, in a car seat. If his crying was overwhelming, she could have put HERSELF in the closet for am adult "time out".

This is a huge red flag. You are on a site attended mostly by childcare providers (a few parents), and we usually jump pretty quickly to defend "our own". I've been caring for children for 24 years, and I am thinking is appropriate. I would NOT take your child back for one more day. Figure out something else, please!
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NightOwl 06:24 PM 09-18-2014
Agreed. We can see things from the provider's angle and will always try to explain what could've happened or what a reasonable explanation could be. NOT THIS. There is no reason good enough for a child in a closet. None.
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daniellesweety1 06:33 PM 09-18-2014
"She seemed shocked when I walked in. I sometimes drop her off a little late (10:30am), but we usually don't come mid-day like that.

I didn't really want to sit there and discuss with her since it was nap-time, so I just dropped off the food and left. Now, maybe there was an explanation to the situation, but I did see a baby in a car seat being pulled out of a closet. My best explanation is she was trying to diffuse the sound so the other kids can sleep!

So do you have your child in a Family daycare or a big daycare center? If it's a daycare center, is it a national or local one?"


My daughter is now 5 so she's in K now. But she attended 3 daycare centers. The first one she didn't stay long because 3 incident occurred within the first 2 months. 1st she was bitten on one arm ( the mark lasted for over a month) however like a week later after being bit, she was bitten again on the opposite arm. ( The teacher tried to tell me she thinks she has eczema) So I told her nope she was bitten again CLEARLY. That was my last straw and I was terminating the end of that week. Just like you, I forgot to bring her bedding and went in the middle of the day. ( The teacher was outside getting her car looked at , she saw me and I watched her run back to the classroom through the side door. She met me at the door and had the NERVE to tell me that she would take the sheets because she didn't want my daughter to see me or she'll cry. I told her "miss my daughter does not cry for me and let me get her things and this is her LAST DAY" she was so shocked and didn't know what to say. I actually took a lot out of me to not go off on her. Other than that the 2nd center were just minor issues with the staff and the 3rd was the last one before pre-k. You have to go with your feelings and something just don't seem right and there is no justifying her actions.
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smoka 07:12 PM 09-18-2014
So my wife talked to the provider and the kid in the closet was our little girl I thought I know her crying after listening to it for 9 months, but I guess not!

She tried to explain that it is not really a closet but a "quiet dark room", which usually calms kids down!!! That just tells me that this is a normal thing for her, which is even more scary. I looked inside the "quiet room" when I was there and it's basically a coat closet! And the look on her face when I walked in tells me that she knew that she's doing something wrong.

Anyways, we'll be pulling the child out of that daycare ASAP. I'm still debating whether I should tell CPS or not because that can probably ruin her career. I have several friends with older kids that have lived in the area, so they should be able to make recommendations. I also don't want to switch her too many times because I want her to adjust to one *nice* place and make friends there.
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Heidi 07:23 PM 09-18-2014
Originally Posted by smoka:
So my wife talked to the provider and the kid in the closet was our little girl I thought I know her crying after listening to it for 9 months, but I guess not!

She tried to explain that it is not really a closet but a "quiet dark room", which usually calms kids down!!! That just tells me that this is a normal thing for her, which is even more scary. I looked inside the "quiet room" when I was there and it's basically a coat closet! And the look on her face when I walked in tells me that she knew that she's doing something wrong.

Anyways, we'll be pulling the child out of that daycare ASAP. I'm still debating whether I should tell CPS or not because that can probably ruin her career. I have several friends with older kids that have lived in the area, so they should be able to make recommendations. I also don't want to switch her too many times because I want her to adjust to one *nice* place and make friends there.
Please, do NOT take her back tomorrow! This is NOT okay, and your child, quite frankly, is now in increased danger. I am not saying this to keep you up tonight, but consider this lady's frustration level already, then add her knowing something is up. Taking it out on your child (or another) is at least an increased possibility. I don't know this lady, and am hesitant to throw her under the bus here, but I say DO NOT TAKE HER BACK, please! Today was your warning that something is wrong.

This needs to reported to licensing. How would you feel about her career if in a month or a year, another child is injured somehow? Don't feel guilty about doing the right thing!
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TwinKristi 08:25 PM 09-18-2014
The fact that she's allowing your child to not only sleep in a closet but IN her infant seat is against the regulations. You witnessed it and she admitted to it. Imagine how you may feel if instead of finding out this way you found out from a police office or fireman who found her in there dead? I don't like to be extreme like that but for reals... A baby in its car seat in the closet?? A lady I interviewed with found her child in a similar manner and pulled. She knew the lady didn't have bad intentions but cultural differences and maybe it's the same here but a child could easily die that way. Positional Asphyxiation and over heating are 2 big factors in infant death. And does screaming and confinement in a dark closet all alone sound comforting to you?? It's abuse! You felt parents should know their child was being treated that way and then you find out its your kid and now it's different?? Yikes!!
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Leigh 08:51 PM 09-18-2014
The 3rd point is a BIT scary? I'd have taken my child and called the police. It's more than a bit scary. I suggest you call your daughter in "sick" tomorrow, so as not to tip off the provider that something is coming, and call CPS immediately to report this. It's not right. I'd lose my license for that and probably face criminal charges, as well.
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Leigh 09:06 PM 09-18-2014
You MUST report this. Your child could have died. Another child could die even after you pull yours. At a minimum, she is neglecting the children. A crying infant needs attention from her caregiver, not to be put in a dark closet, strapped into a carseat (which is dangerous). If it's the end of her career, it SHOULD be...no one should be caring for children when they treat them this way.
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NightOwl 09:10 PM 09-18-2014
You can't concern yourself with her career. She put your helpless, crying baby in a dark closet! You have no idea how long your baby was in there! If she was in her car seat, she may have been in there since you dropped her off!! Think of your baby and the other helpless children, NOT the provider. I don't think there's any cultural differences here. She knew she was doing something wrong based on her reaction to you showing up at an odd time. If you don't want to call cps, tell us the name of her childcare. We'll handle it for you.
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daycare 09:17 PM 09-18-2014
I'm sort but this post made me angry.

REALLY!!!! You are more concerned about this woman's career than that of your own child and the safety of every child in that daycare.

WHY???????

Ugh. This makes me so angry. I don't Ben have anything to say. This must be a joke.
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NightOwl 09:27 PM 09-18-2014
I'm hoping we're not all falling, hook, line and sinker, for a troll.
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smoka 09:48 PM 09-18-2014
I talked to my mother-in-law, who also owns a daycare in Canada and she agreed that we should pull her out right away. I took tomorrow off to go talk to the daycare provider in person and start the new daycare hunt. I asked friends for recommendations and I got several for a 2.5+ years (preschool), so I'll have to tour a few centers which take infants tomorrow.

We may have to do drop-in care or get a stay-home nanny in the meanwhile (it's not easy to find a good daycare on short notice). Luckily, my wife does research and I work at Microsoft, so we both have pretty flexible schedules.

Thanks for all the responses and feedback!
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NightOwl 04:08 AM 09-19-2014
Fantastic! Now to call cps?
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craftymissbeth 05:57 AM 09-19-2014
Call CPS!!!!

Who cares about her career?! Obviously she's not too concerned about whether something horrible happens to your child or not.

In total bluntness: this is what drives me nuts when I see news articles about kids dying in daycares. It's almost ALWAYS "I knew something was off" or "I told her to stop sleeping my baby on his tummy" or "she had new bruises for a month".

Why wait until something horrific happens?
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melilley 06:22 AM 09-19-2014
Originally Posted by craftymissbeth:
Call CPS!!!!

Who cares about her career?! Obviously she's not too concerned about whether something horrible happens to your child or not.

In total bluntness: this is what drives me nuts when I see news articles about kids dying in daycares. It's almost ALWAYS "I knew something was off" or "I told her to stop sleeping my baby on his tummy" or "she had new bruises for a month".

Why wait until something horrific happens?


Sorry, but wtf? In a closet? In a car seat? NO WAY!
REPORT HER!
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ACH247 09:37 AM 09-19-2014
She definitely needs to be reported asap. The kids are in danger.
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daycarediva 09:53 AM 09-19-2014
Originally Posted by Wednesday:
Get your baby out NOW and call cps. Like, yesterday. The other baby was fastened in a car seat and IN A CLOSET?? This is not, not, NOT normal.

Do not take your child back there. The first two points? ehh. Stuff happens sometimes. No provider is perfect. The third point? Run and don't look back. But she must be reported. The other parents need to know their kids are being put into closets! She will be shut down for this kind of behavior.
Originally Posted by Heidi:
There is really NO explanation for a baby being put in a closet, in a car seat. If his crying was overwhelming, she could have put HERSELF in the closet for am adult "time out".

This is a huge red flag. You are on a site attended mostly by childcare providers (a few parents), and we usually jump pretty quickly to defend "our own". I've been caring for children for 24 years, and I am thinking is appropriate. I would NOT take your child back for one more day. Figure out something else, please!
Originally Posted by Wednesday:
Agreed. We can see things from the provider's angle and will always try to explain what could've happened or what a reasonable explanation could be. NOT THIS. There is no reason good enough for a child in a closet. None.
Originally Posted by Leigh:
You MUST report this. Your child could have died. Another child could die even after you pull yours. At a minimum, she is neglecting the children. A crying infant needs attention from her caregiver, not to be put in a dark closet, strapped into a carseat (which is dangerous). If it's the end of her career, it SHOULD be...no one should be caring for children when they treat them this way.
Originally Posted by craftymissbeth:
Call CPS!!!!

Who cares about her career?! Obviously she's not too concerned about whether something horrible happens to your child or not.

In total bluntness: this is what drives me nuts when I see news articles about kids dying in daycares. It's almost ALWAYS "I knew something was off" or "I told her to stop sleeping my baby on his tummy" or "she had new bruises for a month".

Why wait until something horrific happens?
YES YES YES to all of this. IMMEDIATE CPS phone call. I would NOT return to speak to the provider. Nothing she can say/do will exonerate her from this. It is against licensing standards(here) to put a child into a closet, it's against licensing standards(here) not to have children within sight AND sound when they are awake. This is a HUGE red flashing light that other things are happening. Is it abuse? absolutely.

I wouldn't put my child in a corporate/chain center (says the owner of a quality family child care program). I would call every family child care and every small center in the area and ask if they an opening and references.
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ACH247 11:48 AM 09-19-2014
The most likely scenario was that the moment you drove off she placed your child in that closet and she saw you drive up hours later and ran to get the child out of the closet. You caught her in the act and scared her and she hid the child so you wouldn't see. If that wasn't the case, why didn't she stop you to let you know that the child had been crying. I would be so pissed right now. I normally don't comment but this is unacceptable and I wouldn't be calm about it.
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cheerfuldom 01:46 PM 09-19-2014
wow. glad to see you are pulling your daughter. Dont worry at all about adjusting to a new place and certainly not about an infant "making friends".....safety is always, always first. Being placed to sleep in a car seat in a closet is incredibly inappropriate. Babies should never be placed to sleep in car seat. Google positional asphyxiation.
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Thriftylady 08:19 PM 09-19-2014
Glad you are pulling her. As a provider, I was going to give the provider the benefit of the doubt and say you need to have a meeting. Until you got to the closet thing. No child should ever be napping in a car seat IMHO and the closet thing, well that is so over the top I have no words. If my child had been there, they would have left right then and never went back, and I am sure you probably thought that yourself after you left and thought about it.
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Josiegirl 04:18 AM 09-20-2014
Originally Posted by TwinKristi:
The fact that she's allowing your child to not only sleep in a closet but IN her infant seat is against the regulations. You witnessed it and she admitted to it. Imagine how you may feel if instead of finding out this way you found out from a police office or fireman who found her in there dead? I don't like to be extreme like that but for reals... A baby in its car seat in the closet?? A lady I interviewed with found her child in a similar manner and pulled. She knew the lady didn't have bad intentions but cultural differences and maybe it's the same here but a child could easily die that way. Positional Asphyxiation and over heating are 2 big factors in infant death. And does screaming and confinement in a dark closet all alone sound comforting to you?? It's abuse! You felt parents should know their child was being treated that way and then you find out its your kid and now it's different?? Yikes!!
EXACTLY!!!! If you're like me, your child is the breath of your life, every smile you offer the world, every thought you think, every reason you get up every morning. If you're willing to risk bringing her back to that 'provider' one more day well............I hate to say it but where do your priorities lie?
ETA:
Ok sorry, I just read where you're taking off from work and going to search for care. GOOD!!!! I hope you can find someone that you feel safe and loving with for your dd's sake.
I hate it when parents(not you specifically) settle and don't want to ruin a provider's livelihood, even if they could hurt a defenseless child. Never second guess if what you're doing is fair or okay, especially if you have a gut feeling. When it comes to your child, she's the most precious thing to consider.
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Unregistered 06:43 AM 09-20-2014
Please report. If an infant later dies in her care due to neglect and dangerous practices, could you bear that weight on your shoulders knowing what you know? I applaud you pulling your child and protecting her knowing what you now know. Please protect the other innocent little ones, whose parents may never slip in at an unplanned time.
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Josiegirl 05:40 PM 09-20-2014
Side note to this whole topic; I think one of the best ways to know what kind of a daycare any parent has chosen is to show up unexpected during working hours of course. You'll get the 'real deal'. And you're allowed to.
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permanentvacation 08:34 PM 09-20-2014
I decided not to comment on this.
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KidGrind 09:04 AM 09-21-2014
Originally Posted by permanentvacation:
I decided not to comment on this.
We are on the same page.
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Josiegirl 03:30 PM 09-21-2014
You decided not to comment on my reply? Did I say something wrong?
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Silly Songs 09:52 PM 09-21-2014
Original Poster, please please report this provider. However, it will come down to " he said, she said. " I wonder if they will find anything wrong when they investigate. Then what happens ? At least your child will be out of there.
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NightOwl 10:28 PM 09-21-2014
Josie, I think she meant she decided not to comment on this thread.
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Josiegirl 02:39 AM 09-22-2014
Originally Posted by Wednesday:
Josie, I think she meant she decided not to comment on this thread.
I hope so. I know having dcps drop in whenever, can be inconvenient and cause chaos, but from a parent's eye, it's one of the best ways to catch the 'real deal'. JMO
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permanentvacation 07:26 AM 09-22-2014
No, Josie, it was not about anything having to do with you.

I just feel that my opinion was getting a bit heated on this subject. I will try to express my opinion in a little calmer way now.

In my opinion, any parent, or anyone over the age of 4, should know that it is wrong (and anyone over the age of 10 would know that the term is abusive) to put a baby or any child in a closet. Therefore, the parents, once they realized that the babysitter was putting their or any child in a closet should have immediately removed their child from that childcare setting and immediately reported the babysitter to authorities.

By the parents continuing to take their child to that babysitter after being aware that she put a baby in the closet, they are knowingly subjecting their child to abuse and, in my opinion, should also be reported to the authorities.

That's what my post said that I deleted, but it was worded a bit more harshly.
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Unregistered 09:33 AM 09-23-2014
Originally Posted by Wednesday:
I'm hoping we're not all falling, hook, line and sinker, for a troll.
Sounds like a troll to me also
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smoka 09:26 PM 09-23-2014
So I pulled my kid and talked to the provider and asked to see the area she had the car seat. It turns out it was not a closet but a door with stairs leading to a dark basement / laundry room (not quite as bad as a closet). Provider also stated that the door was not fully closed but cracked open so she could hear the baby. I don't know if I believe it all due to the fact that she rushed to get her out when I got there and the situation just looked like she was doing something wrong and the baby was crying loudly. I pulled my child out that day and we're actively searching for new providers. We may have to go with a part time nanny since most good providers have a 3-4 month wait

Anyways, I discussed with her that babies that age (9 months) need to be held and rocked to sleep rather than be put in a dark place (at least our baby). I also provided her with a print-out of the law stating that babies should not be put to sleep in car seats (thanks TwinKristi). She said that other parents specifically request that their kids be put in a dark place to sleep, but that was never discussed with us. There was an oerall lack of communication with this provider and she always said everything is going good when we pick her up. There is no writeup like most group daycares have for infants so we have to ask everything.

Sorry, but I could not report her. As someone said earlier, it could just come to "he said, she said". I did reiterate several times that her communication throughout my child's 3 months there was not good and that this last incident is reportable.

Originally Posted by Wednesday:
I'm hoping we're not all falling, hook, line and sinker, for a troll.
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
Sounds like a troll to me also
I hope you're not calling me a troll. Why the heck would I waste all this time explaining an elaborate situation?
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daycare 09:29 PM 09-23-2014
Originally Posted by smoka:
So I pulled my kid and talked to the provider and asked to see the area she had the car seat. It turns out it was not a closet but a door with stairs leading to a dark basement / laundry room (not quite as bad as a closet). Provider also stated that the door was not fully closed but cracked open so she could hear the baby. I don't know if I believe it all due to the fact that she rushed to get her out when I got there and the situation just looked like she was doing something wrong and the baby was crying loudly. I pulled my child out that day and we're actively searching for new providers. May have to go with a part time nanny since most good providers have a 3-4 month wait

Anyways, I discussed with her that babies that age (9 months) need to be held and rocked to sleep rather than be put in a dark place (at least our baby). She said that other parents specifically request that their kids be put in a dark place to sleep, but that was never discussed with us. There was an overall lack of communication with this provider and she always said everything is going good when we pick her up. There is no writeup like most group daycares have for infants so we have to ask everything. I also provided her with a print-out of the law stating that babies should not be put to sleep in car seats (thanks TwinKristi).

Sorry, I'm going against all your suggestions to report her. I just can't do it!



I hope you're not calling me a troll. Why the heck would I waste all this time explaining an elaborate situation?
I'm glad you got your baby out safe.

But think of that next baby she does this to. Because she will do it again.
You will never forgive yourself if something ever happens to another child

Sorry this makes me sick to my stomach.
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Josiegirl 03:25 AM 09-24-2014
Now smoka, what harm would it do to call your local child care resources or the state and just ask them about the circumstances? Then let them decide what to do??? I certainly wouldn't want it on my conscience if something were to ever happen to someone else's child, would you??
And if you're worried about being the one responsible for affecting her livelihood, you shouldn't be. She's totally the one responsible for that!
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craftymissbeth 06:36 AM 09-24-2014
Originally Posted by smoka:
So I pulled my kid and talked to the provider and asked to see the area she had the car seat. It turns out it was not a closet but a door with stairs leading to a dark basement / laundry room (not quite as bad as a closet). Provider also stated that the door was not fully closed but cracked open so she could hear the baby. I don't know if I believe it all due to the fact that she rushed to get her out when I got there and the situation just looked like she was doing something wrong and the baby was crying loudly. I pulled my child out that day and we're actively searching for new providers. We may have to go with a part time nanny since most good providers have a 3-4 month wait

Anyways, I discussed with her that babies that age (9 months) need to be held and rocked to sleep rather than be put in a dark place (at least our baby). I also provided her with a print-out of the law stating that babies should not be put to sleep in car seats (thanks TwinKristi). She said that other parents specifically request that their kids be put in a dark place to sleep, but that was never discussed with us. There was an oerall lack of communication with this provider and she always said everything is going good when we pick her up. There is no writeup like most group daycares have for infants so we have to ask everything.

Sorry, but I could not report her. As someone said earlier, it could just come to "he said, she said". I did reiterate several times that her communication throughout my child's 3 months there was not good and that this last incident is reportable.



I hope you're not calling me a troll. Why the heck would I waste all this time explaining an elaborate situation?
I still think you have a responsibility to at least call licensing, but at least you pulled your child and are moving on.

I just wanted to comment on the bolded above ^^. It's important to specifically ask your provider how they put children to sleep. For example, I do NOT enroll children who are held or rocked to sleep. It absolutely does not fit into my program. My children are expected to (with sleep training) be able to lay down in a dark room (supervised, of course) and fall asleep on their own.
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permanentvacation 09:53 AM 09-24-2014
Yes, you definitely need to report what you saw to the licensing department or whatever department you have in your area that would be involved in monitoring the childcare providers in your area. You removed your child which is great for your child and your family's peace of mind, but if this provider did this with your child, she most likely will do this with another child. It needs to be investigated by someone with the authority to tell her whether or not what she is doing is safe and legal.
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Play Care 10:07 AM 09-24-2014
Originally Posted by craftymissbeth:
I still think you have a responsibility to at least call licensing, but at least you pulled your child and are moving on.

I just wanted to comment on the bolded above ^^. It's important to specifically ask your provider how they put children to sleep. For example, I do NOT enroll children who are held or rocked to sleep. It absolutely does not fit into my program. My children are expected to (with sleep training) be able to lay down in a dark room (supervised, of course) and fall asleep on their own.
This, I would NOT rock/hold a 9 month old. I put them in the PNP rub their tummy gently with a "nighty night"

And honestly, the closet thing doesn't bother me nearly as much as the basement did (that would be illegal having baby on a separate floor here) - depending on the size of the closet it could be as big as a small bedroom. I know a provider who would nap babies in her large walk in pantry. The door is open with baby monitor on and baby in a PNP - because it was the quietest spot in her open floor plan home (I seriously have pantry envy) but the car seat is a big no-no.
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Country Kids 11:31 AM 09-24-2014
Not sure how this would work but since we all know this has happened is there anyway to find out who this is and report them ourselves. Just reading this and knowing about this doesn't that make it a situation we should report.

Even if someone could call the local R&R in that area?
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Heidi 11:40 AM 09-24-2014
Originally Posted by smoka:
So I pulled my kid and talked to the provider and asked to see the area she had the car seat. It turns out it was not a closet but a door with stairs leading to a dark basement / laundry room (not quite as bad as a closet). Provider also stated that the door was not fully closed but cracked open so she could hear the baby. I don't know if I believe it all due to the fact that she rushed to get her out when I got there and the situation just looked like she was doing something wrong and the baby was crying loudly. I pulled my child out that day and we're actively searching for new providers. We may have to go with a part time nanny since most good providers have a 3-4 month wait

Anyways, I discussed with her that babies that age (9 months) need to be held and rocked to sleep rather than be put in a dark place (at least our baby). I also provided her with a print-out of the law stating that babies should not be put to sleep in car seats (thanks TwinKristi). She said that other parents specifically request that their kids be put in a dark place to sleep, but that was never discussed with us. There was an oerall lack of communication with this provider and she always said everything is going good when we pick her up. There is no writeup like most group daycares have for infants so we have to ask everything.
I am also of the sleep-training camp. My babies learn pretty quickly, and it's a gentle process. But, group care make the whole rocking thing a bit unlikely. There is no way I could supervise my other 3 kiddos while rocking one.
Sorry, but I could not report her. As someone said earlier, it could just come to "he said, she said". I did reiterate several times that her communication throughout my child's 3 months there was not good and that this last incident is reportable.Please, please report her. Again, if something happens to another child there, you will never forgive yourself. Call it in and let the responsible people decide. It's not a court of law. They will most likely just warn her, since there will be no "proof". Unless, of course, she admits it. Then, there won't be any he said/she said.



I hope you're not calling me a troll. Why the heck would I waste all this time explaining an elaborate situation?
Thanks for coming back with an update. You actually wouldn't believe what some people would waste their time "explaining" Around here, we've seen all sorts! I don't believe you're a "troll" at this point
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Hunni Bee 09:35 PM 09-24-2014
I'm sorry, but that sounds like a crock. And I honestly can't tell who its coming from.

You saw a baby being pulled out of closet... Your baby...and didn't recognize her?

When you first spoke to the pprovider, she said that it "not really" a closet but a dark room, you looked at it and decided it was a closet, then she switches her story and says its a basement?? And that's supposed to be better?

Who thinks that's okay? English or no English, who would think that you pay them to stick your kid a closet in their damn car seat? You could've left the child alone at home for all that.

I honestly don't know about this story. If this indeed happened this way, you need to report her at the BARE MINIMUM so that she can get some education on appropriate sleep practices, supervision and dealing with infants. She's not a safe person to be taking care of people's infants and she sounds like a liar.

I'm sorry about the spelling errors but I'm angry.
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daycare 09:49 PM 09-24-2014
Originally Posted by Hunni Bee:
I'm sorry, but that sounds like a crock. And I honestly can't tell who its coming from.

You saw a baby being pulled out of closet... Your baby...and didn't recognize her?

When you first spoke to the pprovider, she said that it "not really" a closet but a dark room, you looked at it and decided it was a closet, then she switches her story and says its a basement?? And that's supposed to be better?

Who thinks that's okay? English or no English, who would think that you pay them to stick your kid a closet in their damn car seat? You could've left the child alone at home for all that.

I honestly don't know about this story. If this indeed happened this way, you need to report her at the BARE MINIMUM so that she can get some education on appropriate sleep practices, supervision and dealing with infants. She's not a safe person to be taking care of people's infants and she sounds like a liar.

I'm sorry about the spelling errors but I'm angry.




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Thriftylady 07:18 PM 09-25-2014
I disagree with you that babies age 9 months should always be rocked to sleep. Some times perhaps but it isn't always possible and laying them down in a crib or PNP is just fine also. I can't believe though you are still talking to her. STOP and report her. It may come down to he said she said, but that isn't for you to decide. That is why we have child protective services they get to decide, not you or me or her. Please let them do their job.
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Unregistered 08:56 PM 09-25-2014
Must say I wonder if you sleep well at night?

When you enroll your child in her next child care setting, do you hope any parents who left with serious safety concerns will have reported them? Will you wonder now if you have a false sense of security picking your next place, as other parents may have left with great concern, but decided to remain quiet?
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NightOwl 10:38 PM 09-25-2014
Originally Posted by Hunni Bee:
I'm sorry, but that sounds like a crock. And I honestly can't tell who its coming from.

You saw a baby being pulled out of closet... Your baby...and didn't recognize her?

When you first spoke to the pprovider, she said that it "not really" a closet but a dark room, you looked at it and decided it was a closet, then she switches her story and says its a basement?? And that's supposed to be better?

Who thinks that's okay? English or no English, who would think that you pay them to stick your kid a closet in their damn car seat? You could've left the child alone at home for all that.

I honestly don't know about this story. If this indeed happened this way, you need to report her at the BARE MINIMUM so that she can get some education on appropriate sleep practices, supervision and dealing with infants. She's not a safe person to be taking care of people's infants and she sounds like a liar.

I'm sorry about the spelling errors but I'm angry.
And this is why it doesn't add up to me and why I suspected a possible troll. What parent would witness their baby being slept in a car seat in a dark CLOSET and NOT report? Can you imagine how scared that baby would've been? Strapped in and in the pitch dark?

Yes, op, I suspect you are a troll for exactly these reasons. Trolls pop in with a crazy story to get everyone riled up. If this is a true story, then I seriously question your integrity for allowing other helpless children to remain in that situation.
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NightOwl 10:38 PM 09-25-2014
Originally Posted by unregistered:
must say i wonder if you sleep well at night?

When you enroll your child in her next child care setting, do you hope any parents who left with serious safety concerns will have reported them? Will you wonder now if you have a false sense of security picking your next place, as other parents may have left with great concern, but decided to remain quiet?
exactly this ^^^
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daycare 12:11 AM 09-26-2014
Originally Posted by Wednesday:
And this is why it doesn't add up to me and why I suspected a possible troll. What parent would witness their baby being slept in a car seat in a dark CLOSET and NOT report? Can you imagine how scared that baby would've been? Strapped in and in the pitch dark?

Yes, op, I suspect you are a troll for exactly these reasons. Trolls pop in with a crazy story to get everyone riled up. If this is a true story, then I seriously question your integrity for allowing other helpless children to remain in that situation.
Exactly my thought.
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daycarediva 11:20 AM 09-26-2014
Originally Posted by craftymissbeth:
I still think you have a responsibility to at least call licensing, but at least you pulled your child and are moving on.

I just wanted to comment on the bolded above ^^. It's important to specifically ask your provider how they put children to sleep. For example, I do NOT enroll children who are held or rocked to sleep. It absolutely does not fit into my program. My children are expected to (with sleep training) be able to lay down in a dark room (supervised, of course) and fall asleep on their own.
I agree. I don't take infants, but I would never rock one to sleep.

I hope this is a troll, I just can't imagine what kind of parent would NOT report this.

The state WILL come out, they WILL investigate.
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