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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Severely Decayed Teeth
auntymimi 08:44 PM 11-17-2015
so, my 4 yo dcg has been complaining of her teeth again. A little back story, about 6 weeks ago I mention a dental apt for my own dd, dcm says she needs to make one too. Little dcg says I have cabities (how she says it) and opens her mouth and says "see". I was shocked at what I saw. Back 4 molars on both sides are so black they are actually crumbling. Just horrible. She started with me 4 mos ago and had to have a physical, nothing was mentioned, but this has to have been going on a long time to have gotten that nasty? Mom still doesn't have an apt, and it's not a money issue. She receives Medicaid and has the number to my daughters ped dentist who I know accepts Medicaid because I asked with her in mind. Is this something you all would report? I'm really worried they may abscess and mom still seems so nonchalant.
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Michael 10:42 PM 11-17-2015
Originally Posted by auntymimi:
so, my 4 yo dcg has been complaining of her teeth again. A little back story, about 6 weeks ago I mention a dental apt for my own dd, dcm says she needs to make one too. Little dcg says I have cabities (how she says it) and opens her mouth and says "see". I was shocked at what I saw. Back 4 molars on both sides are so black they are actually crumbling. Just horrible. She started with me 4 mos ago and had to have a physical, nothing was mentioned, but this has to have been going on a long time to have gotten that nasty? Mom still doesn't have an apt, and it's not a money issue. She receives Medicaid and has the number to my daughters ped dentist who I know accepts Medicaid because I asked with her in mind. Is this something you all would report? I'm really worried they may abscess and mom still seems so nonchalant.
That's child neglect, I would report.
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Ariana 04:12 AM 11-18-2015
Originally Posted by Michael:
That's child neglect, I would report.
Agree! poor girl she must be in some sort of pain from this.
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daycarediva 07:51 AM 11-18-2015
https://www.daycare.com/forum/showthread.php?t=80030

JUST posted about similar issue!

I would require a dental visit. That's quite painful and potentially lethal.
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auntymimi 08:05 AM 11-18-2015
So I called her this morning and basically told her that she HAS to get this taken care of asap or I'd have to discontinue care. I hate to "threaten" parents with cps. IMHO it's very rare that a child is better off in the system, but I'm a mandated reporter and to not report is criminal offense here. I hate this whole situation. I gave her until tomorrow to have an apt.
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Solandia 09:34 AM 11-18-2015
Define "taken care of". Did she say if the child was in the care of a dentist or not?

My 5yo has 2 huge cavities (yes, very gross and noticeable) and several small ones that aren't obvious. He is completely non-compliance for the dentist...which means going under general at the hospital. My insurance makes us jump through hoops, so it will be about 11 months from the discovery of these cavities before it will be finally& two different pedi denstist to get this "taken care of" in January. Its a long sob story that I wouldn't share with anyone unless they asked me personally.

I would be furious is someone hotlined me for neglect because they assumed I didnt care... when the opposite is true. I could get it fixed of a lot sooner if I had $16K laying around, but I don't.
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auntymimi 10:04 AM 11-18-2015
Originally Posted by Solandia:
Define "taken care of". Did she say if the child was in the care of a dentist or not?

My 5yo has 2 huge cavities (yes, very gross and noticeable) and several small ones that aren't obvious. He is completely non-compliance for the dentist...which means going under general at the hospital. My insurance makes us jump through hoops, so it will be about 11 months from the discovery of these cavities before it will be finally& two different pedi denstist to get this "taken care of" in January. Its a long sob story that I wouldn't share with anyone unless they asked me personally.

I would be furious is someone hotlined me for neglect because they assumed I didnt care... when the opposite is true. I could get it fixed of a lot sooner if I had $16K laying around, but I don't.
I mean make an apt. If you had read the original post you will see that the child is on Medicaid so cost is not the issue, there is a pediatric dentist nearby who accepts it. This child ENTIRE back half of her mouth is completely rotten to the point of crumbling, there isn't much tooth structure left. This child has not, ever, to my knowledge even seen a dentist. It is causing her pain. I do not take calling cps lightly, but when it's not an issue of cost or ability to get her medical care, just that mom can't be bothered? I think that is neglect.
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Solandia 10:34 AM 11-18-2015
Originally Posted by auntymimi:
I mean make an apt. If you had read the original post you will see that the child is on Medicaid so cost is not the issue, there is a pediatric dentist nearby who accepts it. This child ENTIRE back half of her mouth is completely rotten to the point of crumbling, there isn't much tooth structure left. This child has not, ever, to my knowledge even seen a dentist. It is causing her pain. I do not take calling cps lightly, but when it's not an issue of cost or ability to get her medical care, just that mom can't be bothered? I think that is neglect.
I missed the part where the child hadn't had any dental care. That is not okay, not at all. i would do the same as you.
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Ariana 11:26 AM 11-18-2015
Originally Posted by auntymimi:
I mean make an apt. If you had read the original post you will see that the child is on Medicaid so cost is not the issue, there is a pediatric dentist nearby who accepts it. This child ENTIRE back half of her mouth is completely rotten to the point of crumbling, there isn't much tooth structure left. This child has not, ever, to my knowledge even seen a dentist. It is causing her pain. I do not take calling cps lightly, but when it's not an issue of cost or ability to get her medical care, just that mom can't be bothered? I think that is neglect.
Yes! I had a mom that couldn't be bothered to take her child to an allergist or a naturopathic DR and just doped her up with allergy meds every single day at 5 years old. I consider that neglect personally but apparently it isn't. Tooth decay is a whole other story.
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Baby Beluga 01:01 PM 11-18-2015
Originally Posted by Ariana:
Yes! I had a mom that couldn't be bothered to take her child to an allergist or a naturopathic DR and just doped her up with allergy meds every single day at 5 years old. I consider that neglect personally but apparently it isn't. Tooth decay is a whole other story.
Out of curiosity - are you upset that the child was on daily allergy medications or upset that the child hadn't had an allergy screening?
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nannyde 01:14 PM 11-18-2015
I think I would tell her she must take the child to the dentist immediately before calling cps. Some parents believe because baby teeth aren't permanent that they aren't important or that if they have cavities it's no big deal because they are going to loose them anyway. You would be surprised how many people think that.

If she refused then I would have to call it in.
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Play Care 01:28 PM 11-18-2015
Originally Posted by Baby Beluga:
Out of curiosity - are you upset that the child was on daily allergy medications or upset that the child hadn't had an allergy screening?
Personally I'd rather have a child on allergy meds than what I usually get - runny, sneezy, red eyed kids who clearly have allergies and they are just left to be miserable.

Unless my child had serious allergy issues I wouldn't rush to get testing. I just had a full panel done in September and it was ouchy. My younger DD freaks at needles so that's not happening. Her ped recommended we use children's Claritin when she has allergy symptoms. So far she's only needed it a few times. When she's older if she chooses (or her allergies become more problematic) then she can do the full testing.

But yeah, completely different than allowing teeth to rot.
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Unregistered 02:47 PM 11-18-2015
Originally Posted by Ariana:
Yes! I had a mom that couldn't be bothered to take her child to an allergist or a naturopathic DR and just doped her up with allergy meds every single day at 5 years old. I consider that neglect personally but apparently it isn't. Tooth decay is a whole other story.
I personally wouldn't be able to afford either of those. Allergy med's would be my only option. My dd allergies started at 3yrs old. Neglect? Maybe you need to look up the definition.
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Febby 05:31 PM 11-18-2015
Yeah, it takes a while for teeth to get to that point, even if they're weak to start with. I've been known to neglect my own health, especially dental health, but I'm an adult and that's my own fault and my own consequences. Neglecting a child's health though? Not acceptable. She needs to get an appointment ASAP, otherwise, I'd report.

ETA: As far as allergy meds go, if the OTC meds control the allergy symptoms, then I don't see the neglect there. I ended up seeing an allergy specialist when I was younger, but it took lots and lots of different allergy meds and combinations of allergy meds to get me comfortable.
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Ariana 07:15 AM 11-19-2015
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
I personally wouldn't be able to afford either of those. Allergy med's would be my only option. My dd allergies started at 3yrs old. Neglect? Maybe you need to look up the definition.
I'm Canadian so it's all "free" and ND appointments are covered under most insurance plans. Maybe you should have thought about how much kids cost before you had them I'd take on a second job if it meant saving my child.
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Ariana 07:19 AM 11-19-2015
Originally Posted by Baby Beluga:
Out of curiosity - are you upset that the child was on daily allergy medications or upset that the child hadn't had an allergy screening?
Daily doping bothers me. Child is miserable even when on the daily dope. I happen to know these people and how much they make and what mom spends on gym memberships and personal trainers so cost was not an issue (plus ND's are covered with most insurance plans here). She basically said "Ugh I am just so tired of taking her to appointments" when her appointments are ALWAYS for sickness due to allergies which she is not getting help for. This child was on daily doses of Claritin and using a puffer. She was constantly sick, huge black rings under her eyes etc. I am not one to flip out over nothing. This child was extremely sick on a daily basis. This is why in this particular situation I considered it neglect.

Allergy meds control symptoms they don't solve the underlying allergy. Most Naturopathic DR's are able to figure out what is causing the allergies. Wouldn't that be 10X better?? For example an allergist might tell you that you are allergic to dust. Meanwhile the true allergy is wheat. My husband for example is a severe asthmatic and his DR told him he was allergic to dust, cats and dogs...fairly difficult to avoid so he doped himself all the time. Then he went to an ND who told him to stop eating citrus fruits and dairy and voila he doesn't need to use his meds anymore. I know ND's are expensive and I wouldn't expect someone to go if they didn't have insurance but honestly it's your health and how much are you spending yearly on allergy meds!
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daycarediva 07:39 AM 11-19-2015
Originally Posted by Play Care:
Personally I'd rather have a child on allergy meds than what I usually get - runny, sneezy, red eyed kids who clearly have allergies and they are just left to be miserable.

Unless my child had serious allergy issues I wouldn't rush to get testing. I just had a full panel done in September and it was ouchy. My younger DD freaks at needles so that's not happening. Her ped recommended we use children's Claritin when she has allergy symptoms. So far she's only needed it a few times. When she's older if she chooses (or her allergies become more problematic) then she can do the full testing.

But yeah, completely different than allowing teeth to rot.
I agree with this- my youngest and oldest are on daily preventatives. DD takes claritin D and DS takes Allegra. DD has had allergy testing (dust, mold) younger DS has only had preliminary bloodwork. His symptoms are controlled, so the pediatrician said it isn't a big deal to wait. I take kids with preventatives, as long as it's doctor ordered. I DO NOT allow a parent to just decide it's allergies and give benadryl.

Originally Posted by Ariana:
I'm Canadian so it's all "free" and ND appointments are covered under most insurance plans. Maybe you should have thought about how much kids cost before you had them I'd take on a second job if it meant saving my child.
I hate when parents use cost as an excuse. Kids are expensive.
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TwinKristi 10:15 AM 11-19-2015
We just had a discussion about this on a local group and I think it constitutes neglect. It's one thing it the child was younger and non-verbal but the fact that she can say she has "cabities" to me says she's not getting the medical attention she needs. I would give her a deadline and if she doesn't have her seen by then I would threaten termination and report to CPS.
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Baby Beluga 12:07 PM 11-19-2015
Originally Posted by Ariana:
Daily doping bothers me. Child is miserable even when on the daily dope. I happen to know these people and how much they make and what mom spends on gym memberships and personal trainers so cost was not an issue (plus ND's are covered with most insurance plans here). She basically said "Ugh I am just so tired of taking her to appointments" when her appointments are ALWAYS for sickness due to allergies which she is not getting help for. This child was on daily doses of Claritin and using a puffer. She was constantly sick, huge black rings under her eyes etc. I am not one to flip out over nothing. This child was extremely sick on a daily basis. This is why in this particular situation I considered it neglect.

Allergy meds control symptoms they don't solve the underlying allergy. Most Naturopathic DR's are able to figure out what is causing the allergies. Wouldn't that be 10X better?? For example an allergist might tell you that you are allergic to dust. Meanwhile the true allergy is wheat. My husband for example is a severe asthmatic and his DR told him he was allergic to dust, cats and dogs...fairly difficult to avoid so he doped himself all the time. Then he went to an ND who told him to stop eating citrus fruits and dairy and voila he doesn't need to use his meds anymore. I know ND's are expensive and I wouldn't expect someone to go if they didn't have insurance but honestly it's your health and how much are you spending yearly on allergy meds!
Thank you for clarifying.

My DD is on a daily allergy medication which is why your post intrigued me

To make a very long story short, DD has a whole slew of allergies - food, animal and environmental. We have completely eliminated the problematic food, have no pets ourselves (aside from one beta fish...) nor do we know anyone with pets. She is still on a daily allergy medication for environmental allergies which cannot be avoided here. I would hate to think someone considered me to be a neglectful parent because she is on a daily medication. However, she has been tested (tests were just under 3 grand) and will be retested in a couple of months.

I ado agree that allergies and rotting teeth are apples and oranges though. Especially considering that teeth take quite a while to get to that point of decay.
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Ariana 12:10 PM 11-19-2015
Originally Posted by Baby Beluga:
Thank you for clarifying.

My DD is on a daily allergy medication which is why your post intrigued me

To make a very long story short, DD has a whole slew of allergies - food, animal and environmental. We have completely eliminated the problematic food, have no pets ourselves (aside from one beta fish...) nor do we know anyone with pets. She is still on a daily allergy medication for environmental allergies which cannot be avoided here. I would hate to think someone considered me to be a neglectful parent because she is on a daily medication. However, she has been tested (tests were just under 3 grand) and will be retested in a couple of months.

I ado agree that allergies and rotting teeth are apples and oranges though. Especially considering that teeth take quite a while to get to that point of decay.
To me you have done your due diligence as a mother and there is no way I would consider you a neglectful parent.

I think in the USA with the cost of healthcare being what it is it might be that we just have different ways of looking at things too. I have no idea what allergy tests costs because it doesn't cost any of us Canadians anything out of pocket. So you can see why it truly is neglectful parenting to not even take your child to an allergist for free!!
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Baby Beluga 12:15 PM 11-19-2015
Originally Posted by Ariana:
To me you have done your due diligence as a mother and there is no way I would consider you a neglectful parent.

I think in the USA with the cost of healthcare being what it is it might be that we just have different ways of looking at things too. I have no idea what allergy tests costs because it doesn't cost any of us Canadians anything out of pocket. So you can see why it truly is neglectful parenting to not even take your child to an allergist for free!!
Absolutely!
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Unregistered 03:17 PM 11-19-2015
Originally Posted by Ariana:
I'm Canadian so it's all "free" and ND appointments are covered under most insurance plans. Maybe you should have thought about how much kids cost before you had them I'd take on a second job if it meant saving my child.
Dear Lord, I'm talking about allergies not life or death. Little dramatic ya think. Yeah, I was thinking about how expensive kids were when I was 22... I also meant to get pregnant.
It's not life or death.
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Unregistered 03:19 PM 11-19-2015
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
I personally wouldn't be able to afford either of those. Allergy med's would be my only option. My dd allergies started at 3yrs old. Neglect? Maybe you need to look up the definition.
I was referring to seasonal allergies.
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Unregistered 03:40 PM 11-19-2015
Originally Posted by Ariana:
I'm Canadian so it's all "free" and ND appointments are covered under most insurance plans. Maybe you should have thought about how much kids cost before you had them I'd take on a second job if it meant saving my child.
I'm in the usa. I'm too rich to get insurance and too poor to afford it.
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jenboo 04:10 PM 11-19-2015
Originally Posted by Ariana:
To me you have done your due diligence as a mother and there is no way I would consider you a neglectful parent.

I think in the USA with the cost of healthcare being what it is it might be that we just have different ways of looking at things too. I have no idea what allergy tests costs because it doesn't cost any of us Canadians anything out of pocket. So you can see why it truly is neglectful parenting to not even take your child to an allergist for free!!
For my family of 3, we pay $600 a month for health insurance! It's horrible! On top of that we have the co pays, deductible, etc.
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Unregistered 03:15 AM 11-20-2015
Hi, this is on topic but might seem slightly odd cos I am talking about an adult ha. My father in law had an issue with his teeth, he developed an abscess in one. He sought and received dental medical care. The infection STILL went on to move into his blood and brain. He slipped into a coma and has finally awoken 6 months later with some brain damage. He can no longer live independently (although because he was being treated there is a chance that things will improve for him).
This was while he was being treated, and the outcome has still been horrific. Untreated, and he would not be with us at all. Dental treatment for all ages is imperative.
I hope that mum, and everyone else seeks dental care now. Things can go bad so very very fast.
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auntymimi 05:24 AM 11-20-2015
Originally Posted by nannyde:
I think I would tell her she must take the child to the dentist immediately before calling cps. Some parents believe because baby teeth aren't permanent that they aren't important or that if they have cavities it's no big deal because they are going to loose them anyway. You would be surprised how many people think that.

If she refused then I would have to call it in.
I think this was the case. She knew the child was in pain so she would use orajel and Tylenol to mask. When I pressed the issue with making an apt. She seemed shocked that it "was such a big deal". She had no idea how potentially dangerous this could be. She has an apt for Dec. I may have to start requiring a dental visit as well as physical from now on. My state is kind of known for its lackadaisical attitude toward dental health, and health in general. Sad.
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Play Care 05:40 AM 11-20-2015
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
Hi, this is on topic but might seem slightly odd cos I am talking about an adult ha. My father in law had an issue with his teeth, he developed an abscess in one. He sought and received dental medical care. The infection STILL went on to move into his blood and brain. He slipped into a coma and has finally awoken 6 months later with some brain damage. He can no longer live independently (although because he was being treated there is a chance that things will improve for him).
This was while he was being treated, and the outcome has still been horrific. Untreated, and he would not be with us at all. Dental treatment for all ages is imperative.
I hope that mum, and everyone else seeks dental care now. Things can go bad so very very fast.
How awful!!
Sending prayers and good thoughts to your family.

But it also highlights that dental care is important. And to find a dentist that doesn't let things go. The reason I had to get a root canal a few years ago was because my dentist at the time was "watching" a "spot" on my molar. I switched dentists to be closer to home and the new dentist was shocked. Apparently it was pretty severely decayed on the one tooth and had spread to the tooth next to it.
My current dentist is very aggressive (wont accept patients who refuse x-rays) and fills all cavities. She's also big on prevention. I haven't had a cavity in years.
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Unregistered 12:12 PM 11-20-2015
Originally Posted by Ariana:
To me you have done your due diligence as a mother and there is no way I would consider you a neglectful parent.

I think in the USA with the cost of healthcare being what it is it might be that we just have different ways of looking at things too. I have no idea what allergy tests costs because it doesn't cost any of us Canadians anything out of pocket. So you can see why it truly is neglectful parenting to not even take your child to an allergist for free!!
Last time I checked it was $1000-$1500 (usa)
Deductible is $5000 so I would pay for everything. That deductible is with a $600/month insurance.
It's ridiculous!
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Ariana 10:26 AM 11-22-2015
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
Last time I checked it was $1000-$1500 (usa)
Deductible is $5000 so I would pay for everything. That deductible is with a $600/month insurance.
It's ridiculous!


Ridiculous!
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Unregistered 06:53 AM 12-05-2015
Originally Posted by Ariana:


Ridiculous!
It is. My relative was a quoted a similar price for just herself and she only makes 35K. O O
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Tags:child neglect, rotten teeth, tooth decay
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