Default Style Register
Daycare.com Forum
Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Not Cutting Your Baby's Hair....
youretooloud 07:48 AM 12-09-2012
This is just a vent with no actual advice needed. LOL

I had this boy this week who is nine months old, and seriously needs a haircut. But they "don't want to cut his beautiful baby hair". Which is silly, because it was nearly the first thing the mom said when dropping him off to me. I didn't bring it up, so it's obviously an issue at home.

It's that long, thin, whispy baby hair, that is uneven, and is much longer on the top and in the front than in the back, so his hair is always in his face.

He has a slightly runny nose...nothing bad, just normal baby boogers. His hair was always getting stuck in his boogers. If it wasn't stuck in his boogers, it was in his mouth, and it was FOREVER in his eyes.

But, mom and (maybe dad) see him and think "What beautiful hair", I see him and think "wow...he needs a hair cut".

So, on Friday, they picked up his professional pictures, and brought them to me to see. They LOVE these pictures. He is the most beautiful child they've ever seen, and his hair is wonderful. So, they are rightfully proud of these pictures. They adore this kid.

But, to me, the pictures aren't as cute as they would be if his hair was not across his face. To me, I see a messy boy doing an expensive photo shoot. Even a cute hat would have made him look really cute.

Last week, I clipped his hair out of the way a few times (with a girl clip that I made look more boy-ish) and then one of the other kids brought him a beanie shaped like Yoda. The yoda hat was seriously cute. Plus, he has red hair, so the yoda hat over red hair cracked me up every time. *He IS super cute when his hair is not in his face...I've only had three red headed kids in 35 years of daycare, so he's so very cute and unique*

Anyway... just my rant..... long wispy baby hair is not cute to me. I don't have a problem with long hair on boys, but not this thin unkempt infant hair.
Reply
DaisyMamma 09:06 AM 12-09-2012
Nope, it looks dumb. I agree entirely.
I had a dcb whose mom thinks he's a baby and doesn't need it cut. His bangs were in his face all the time. Finally she got it "trimmed" but was barely worth the time and efforts of whoever cut it. Two weeks later it looks just as bad as it did before.
With that said, my daughter was over 2 when I cut her hair the first time after it was cut I realized how dumb it had looked.
Reply
countrymom 11:36 AM 12-09-2012
I had one like this too "oh his curly hair is so cute" ya, its cute when its full of food and boogers and he can't see because its in his eyes. So I started clipping it up, with a small rubber band, they got the hint.
Reply
SilverSabre25 11:38 AM 12-09-2012
I agree...with both the pps. The bangs should at least be trimmed back so they are out of his face. I was going to suggest clipping...maybe a bobby pin? Or maybe let mom and dad see him with the clip in :P

And yeah, I waited 3 years to get DD's hair cut (it grew so slowly...and she was bald until after 1) but she looked sooo much better after that I really regret not doing it sooner.

DS will probably be close to two or even older before he needs a hair cut, but then, he's 18 months and still has very short wispy hair (that my MIL comments EVERY TIME SHE SEES HIM, "Oh did he get a hair cut? His hair is so cute and even!").
Reply
momofboys 01:35 PM 12-09-2012
None of my kids had "real" hair cuts until they were all over 2 - but then none of them had much hair until they were 1. My youngest (now 5) had beautiful hair (but not in his eyes) and got it trimmed many times but not really truly a full hair cut - he didn't get that until he was 4. All of my kids had really curly hair also & it was hard for me to "cut their curls" so to speak knowing that the curliness would likely not last after they had their hair cut. But I can understand if this child's hair is in their eyes, frustrating I am sure. Can't the parent at least trim the bangs?!? But that being said whether you think it is stupid or not realize that for some parents (myself included) cutting their child's hair is a very personal thing & is a stage of them seeing their child growing up - maybe part of the reason I waited for so long with our last - it is hard to let go of that for some parents so try to cut these parents a little slack - all they see is their cutie and they don't care if their hair covers their eyes! And I don't regret for one minute waiting (but then my kids always gotbang trims!!!).
Reply
littlemissmuffet 02:47 PM 12-09-2012
This is a huge pet peeve of mine. Start sending him home in very girly hair clips/bows - I promise, they'll cut it asap! Mine always cut it after I even mention putting in clips
Reply
Kaddidle Care 02:56 PM 12-09-2012
To each his/her own. If it is affecting the child's eyesight then I would say something. Otherwise I would treat it as you would a girl's hair. If you're doing something messy and the hair is going to get in it - or if they are using scissors then I would tie it back.
Reply
youretooloud 03:08 PM 12-09-2012
Originally Posted by littlemissmuffet:
This is a huge pet peeve of mine. Start sending him home in very girly hair clips/bows - I promise, they'll cut it asap! Mine always cut it after I even mention putting in clips

I did pull it back into clips, but I took them out before nap time, I'd never send him home like that. We used colored fabric paint to make it into a racing car looking clip, so at least it was boy-ish. I saw a lego clip that would be cute and easy... I even have some of those thin legos.
Reply
MarinaVanessa 05:26 PM 12-09-2012
Originally Posted by littlemissmuffet:
This is a huge pet peeve of mine. Start sending him home in very girly hair clips/bows - I promise, they'll cut it asap! Mine always cut it after I even mention putting in clips
I've done this also. Like another poster said ... I treat it like it was any other child's hair. If a girls hair gets in her face and it becomes a hazard (can't see and causes falls, gets in mouth or nose etc) I put a little hair tie on the top of her head (like a fountain) and call it a day. I did this for a 2yo DCB not too long ago and the DCD wasn't too happy about it but I explained that it was getting in his way (in his mouth when he was eating, getting stuck to his boogies, covering his eyes and he was having trouble seeing etc) and he understood. It took about 2 months but they did eventually cut his hair.

It doesn't bother me to have a child's hair long as long as the parent's don't mind that I put it up.
Reply
mema 06:02 PM 12-09-2012
I have one of those dcb's too. I also just put a clip in it if we are doing something messy. I guess if they want it long and "fuzzy" looking, that's their deal. I wouldn't be able to do it. My ds had his first haircut at 2 months because it was past the nape of his neck. He looked like such a little man when it was done. I actually should have cut it a few weeks before I did.
Reply
daycarediva 03:07 AM 12-10-2012
I have a dcb with hair past his shoulders. It drives me crazy, as it is always in his face! I pulled the bangs/top half into a ponytail last week and Dad was NOT HAPPY at pickup. I just said that I was sorry, but he kept getting boogers stuck in it and was resistant to letting me clean it (understatement of the year) and he said "Oh, gross" and seemed less upset. I did tell him that I would repeat as necessary.
Reply
Scout 04:02 AM 12-10-2012
Originally Posted by littlemissmuffet:
This is a huge pet peeve of mine. Start sending him home in very girly hair clips/bows - I promise, they'll cut it asap! Mine always cut it after I even mention putting in clips
This is just what I was thinking too...
Reply
Scout 04:05 AM 12-10-2012
With my oldest son I was reluctant to cut his hair(but, I do not think it was in his eyes) until one day someone said "oh, what an adorable little girl!"...out came the scissors!! Maybe they need something like this to happen also.
Reply
DBug 04:09 AM 12-10-2012
I have a dcg like this! On Friday, her bangs were attached to her nose because it was running so much after playing outside . Ick!

I'll be getting out the baby elastics today
Reply
SilverSabre25 04:57 AM 12-10-2012
Originally Posted by daycarediva:
I have a dcb with hair past his shoulders. It drives me crazy, as it is always in his face! I pulled the bangs/top half into a ponytail last week and Dad was NOT HAPPY at pickup. I just said that I was sorry, but he kept getting boogers stuck in it and was resistant to letting me clean it (understatement of the year) and he said "Oh, gross" and seemed less upset. I did tell him that I would repeat as necessary.
but...but...but...usually when they wear a boy's hair that long they don't MIND a ponytail!!!
Reply
daycarediva 05:31 AM 12-10-2012
Originally Posted by SilverSabre25:
but...but...but...usually when they wear a boy's hair that long they don't MIND a ponytail!!!
That's what I assumed as well! Even my dh said "He looks good like that!" Atleast his hair looks nice, is clean and always well maintained upon arrival, etc. I shouldn't complain!
Reply
countrymom 05:37 AM 12-10-2012
well, you know how inoccent kids are. Well, I took my bunch to the park one day and there was a boy about 2 yr old playing too. So the boy decided he wanted to play with my kiddies. Well my kiddies kept calling him a girl over and over again, the mom would kept correcting them, but really the kids called it like they saw it. She was mad, but what am I suppose to do when he did look like a girl.
Reply
Blackcat31 08:31 AM 12-10-2012
I have a little guy here right now who is African American and has not had a haircut in over a year....his hair is HUGE and waaaaaaaaay out of control. He is 4 yrs old.

I literally have to pick things out of his hair sometimes because it collects so much stuff throughout the day. His mom is fully aware of how awful it looks and even makes jokes about looking for missing things (like car keys etc) in his hair but she still hasn't gotten it cut. Why? He won't let her.

My own DS had to get real hair cuts by the time he was 6 months old as he had a full head of hair and it grew so quickly that he saw the barber every month. We have super healthy and quick growing hair in my family. My DD had long flowing curls down to her bottom by the time she was a year old.

For daycare kids though, I treat hair the same for both sexes. If it's in the face or in the way, it gets clipped or secured back so the child can participate without worrying about their hair. I don't care if parents like the clips or pony tails or not. It is what it is and safety ALWAYS prevails.
Reply
crazydaycarelady 08:48 AM 12-10-2012
I would have that clip in his hair when dcm comes to pick-up and just mention that his hair was getting stuck in his snot - I would think that would prompt a haircut.
Reply
momofsix 07:39 PM 12-10-2012
With some cultures it's a huge no-no to cut baby's hair before their first birthday. I've had some pretty goofy looking kids before they turned a year
But hair getting in the drippy nose is just gross
Reply
Hazel 05:00 AM 12-11-2012
I have a Chinese family and it's a tradition to cut a baby's hair at 100 days old. Don't know if this is just for boys tho (since i only have the one boy) but he looked SO much better!
Reply
brookeroo 12:33 PM 12-11-2012
I have a little boy who had a baby mullet. He is cute but I was so excited when they cut his hair. He has what appears to be Justin Beiber's hair cut now and he's only like 8 months old. Funny. He's cute but I'm so glad they finally chopped it. He looks so much better!
Reply
Patches 09:14 PM 12-23-2012
Originally Posted by DaisyMamma:
With that said, my daughter was over 2 when I cut her hair the first time after it was cut I realized how dumb it had looked.
I was the same way with my first son. His hair grew slow on top and faster on the sides and back, so he basically had a natural mullet. EVERYONE kept telling me to cut his hair but I thought it was sooooo adorable. He was amost 2 when I finally got it cut and now when I look back at pictures, I realized that it was not cute at all. First child syndrome blinded me
Reply
MamaG 10:52 PM 12-23-2012
My son had beautiful hair as a baby. My poor lil girl has the type of hair you talked about. I get it trimmed often and it has helped it look thicker. Nobody wants hair in their face! She used to complain about it and cry! That's why we had it cut, got a pixie type hair cut and it looks awesome on her because of her fine whispy hair.
Reply
MamaG 10:58 PM 12-23-2012
Originally Posted by countrymom:
well, you know how inoccent kids are. Well, I took my bunch to the park one day and there was a boy about 2 yr old playing too. So the boy decided he wanted to play with my kiddies. Well my kiddies kept calling him a girl over and over again, the mom would kept correcting them, but really the kids called it like they saw it. She was mad, but what am I suppose to do when he did look like a girl.
My son could be wearing Spider-Man tshirt, jeans, Spider-Man shows and still people asked me what HER name was!! Ticked me off. I had to cut his hair. I don't think he looked like a girl myself. I hated that his curls never came back
Reply
Bookworm 12:45 PM 12-24-2012
There's a 2 yr old in my center with very long hair ( mid back) and at least twice a week, DCD gets ticked because someone would ask if DCB was a girl or boy and why won't they cut his hair because he looks like a girl.
Reply
KEG123 01:59 PM 12-25-2012
I guess I'm in the minority because I think, while you're entitled to your opinion, I think this post comes off kinda rude. What if they want to grow his hair out? My dd is 14 months and her hair is in her eyes. I'm trying to grow it out. She takes out pony tails and clippies. So yes, it's in her eyes. But so what?
Reply
Former Teacher 02:18 PM 12-25-2012
Originally Posted by KEG123:
I guess I'm in the minority because I think, while you're entitled to your opinion, I think this post comes off kinda rude. What if they want to grow his hair out? My dd is 14 months and her hair is in her eyes. I'm trying to grow it out. She takes out pony tails and clippies. So yes, it's in her eyes. But so what?
You are absolutely entitled to your opinion

My opinion in this is that I find it neglectful when a child's (both boy and girl) hair is in their face. The hair catches everything from dirt to food to snot. While some kids do keep their clips etc in their hair, most do not. Then you have a choking hazard.

I just find it neglectful that a parent doesn't take a few mins to at least trim around the eyes.
Reply
KEG123 02:29 PM 12-25-2012
How do you expect parents to get their childs hair long then? Or do you think both boys and girls should have pixie cuts?
Reply
Former Teacher 02:47 PM 12-25-2012
Originally Posted by KEG123:
How do you expect parents to get their childs hair long then? Or do you think both boys and girls should have pixie cuts?
Getting hair long is one thing. Having it in their face to where to they can't see or they wind up eating it is a totally different thing.
Reply
MyAngels 10:05 PM 12-25-2012
Originally Posted by KEG123:
How do you expect parents to get their childs hair long then?
When my dd was little I really wanted her hair to grow out and so I really resisted cutting it at all, but as soon as I had it trimmed (I only let the lady cut it by about 1/2" ) it started growing in fast and thick. She's had beautiful, thick, shiny hair ever since.
Reply
Blackcat31 06:19 AM 12-26-2012
Originally Posted by KEG123:
How do you expect parents to get their childs hair long then? Or do you think both boys and girls should have pixie cuts?
My DD had really long hair by the time she was 2 years old. I kept her hair out of her face while it was growing long by securing it with clips and rubber bands she couldn't remove easily. My DD also knew better than to try and strip them out of her hair.

If a child continues to remove the clips or rubberbands then they aren't old enough to have long hair and for safety reasons should have it cut.

If you really really want your child to have long hair and yet they continue pulling out the clips and the hair is in their face, then make sure you don't ask someone else who is already watching several other children to watch her....kwim?

As a child care provider, parents who send their children with hair accessories that are easily removed, bother me because the hair accessories can not only be hazardous to other kids but can be bothersome to me as I have enough things to do during the day.

Parents can have their child's hair long or short, blue or green, on boys or girls......I don't care. Just as long as it isn't a hazard to the child or to the other children in care.
Reply
Willow 06:29 AM 12-26-2012
Inconvenient at times, maybe, but is it really that big of a deal?

If this was baby was a girl would we seriously be having this conversation? Because they've all got to grow theirs out the exact same way.

I've had several foster infants who's hair could not be cut before they turned one because in their culture.

There is no way no how I would ever judge a parent as neglectful or criticize them for that.

Many many people asked me to cut it and most times I didn't want to get into how in the child's culture cutting the hair before their 1st birthday was tantamount to severing their soul.....so I usually just said it's because I prefer it that way as well
Reply
Country Kids 06:43 AM 12-26-2012
My dd had to have pigtails at two weeks due to being born with extremly long hair (to her shoulders). The nurses kept taking her out of the room so they could show people how much hair this wee one had. People would comment it looked like a small wig- We had it trimmed at like a month or two old to give it some shape and also so that it would be easier for me to work with.

My two ds also was just a few months old when I had their hair trimmed for the same reason to give it some shape and so that I could keep it combed easier.

We usually are visiting our salon about every month because our hair grows so fast! My one dd doesn't as she is growing her hair out and is afraid they will take two much off even though I reasure her they won't.

I never had super long hair till I was an adult. When I was little my mom kept it in a pixie cut or to my shoulders. She would say, "when you can take care of your hair and keep the tangles out, wash it extremely well and get all the soap out you can have long hair." I grew my hair out to my bra strap probably starting in junior high.
Reply
KEG123 10:16 AM 12-26-2012
LOL @ a 1 year old "knowing better" to take out their hair clips. Try talking to my 14 month old. I can occasionally get her to keep something in for an hour tops. And I've seen many contradictions in this thread. Put clippies in their hair, don't "let them" take the clippies out (how do you propose that, duct tape mittens on their hands?), the clippies are choking hazards. Which is it? Clippies that are a choking hazard or hair in the eyes? I honestly can NOT see long hair as a hazard. Messy sometimes? Yeah, sure. If they like to put messy and/or buggery hands in their hair.... but so what? That's what bath time is for. I can't believe some of the rediculous judgements coming from this thread.
Reply
SilverSabre25 10:56 AM 12-26-2012
Originally Posted by KEG123:
LOL @ a 1 year old "knowing better" to take out their hair clips. Try talking to my 14 month old. I can occasionally get her to keep something in for an hour tops. And I've seen many contradictions in this thread. Put clippies in their hair, don't "let them" take the clippies out (how do you propose that, duct tape mittens on their hands?), the clippies are choking hazards. Which is it? Clippies that are a choking hazard or hair in the eyes? I honestly can NOT see long hair as a hazard. Messy sometimes? Yeah, sure. If they like to put messy and/or buggery hands in their hair.... but so what? That's what bath time is for. I can't believe some of the rediculous judgements coming from this thread.
I think you need to tone it down a little bit; this thread has been around for a few weeks now and the OP wasn't looking to be lambasted by anyone, just expressing a pet peeve/frustration, which is okay and part of what the forum is for. It's okay that there are contradictions, people approach things differently. As a moderator, I'm asking you to please chill--your tone is very argumentative.
Reply
KEG123 12:20 PM 12-26-2012
Originally Posted by SilverSabre25:
I think you need to tone it down a little bit; this thread has been around for a few weeks now and the OP wasn't looking to be lambasted by anyone, just expressing a pet peeve/frustration, which is okay and part of what the forum is for. It's okay that there are contradictions, people approach things differently. As a moderator, I'm asking you to please chill--your tone is very argumentative.
I don't mean to be argumentative. I just think, as a parent of a 14 month old with hair in her eyes, this thread seems silly. There are way worse things to get our panties in a bunch about than long hair.
Reply
Unregistered 04:02 PM 09-04-2019
Originally Posted by KEG123:
How do you expect parents to get their childs hair long then? Or do you think both boys and girls should have pixie cuts?
You can wait until they are older and can keep it out of their face by themselves.
Reply
springv 04:14 PM 09-04-2019
We have a DCB that has long hair and possibly autistic and he really needs a haircut
Reply
Unregistered 05:47 PM 09-04-2019
So I know in orthodox Jewish families, they dont do a hair cut till 3. Its cut in a ceremony known as upsherin. its a huge deal, theres a party, usually the parents gift the child their first torah. Our family cheated and I had a ceremony at age 2.
Reply
hwichlaz 09:34 AM 09-05-2019
Originally Posted by KEG123:
I don't mean to be argumentative. I just think, as a parent of a 14 month old with hair in her eyes, this thread seems silly. There are way worse things to get our panties in a bunch about than long hair.
I teach infants not to remove sunhats quite easily. I'm sure I could apply that to hair ties as well.
Reply
hwichlaz 09:35 AM 09-05-2019
Originally Posted by KEG123:
I don't mean to be argumentative. I just think, as a parent of a 14 month old with hair in her eyes, this thread seems silly. There are way worse things to get our panties in a bunch about than long hair.
It's also silly to let your child's hair obscure their vision because YOU have a hang up about wanting long hair.
Reply
Annalee 09:36 AM 09-05-2019
Originally Posted by springvalley112:
We have a DCB that has long hair and possibly autistic and he really needs a haircut
DCB3 here is being evaluated as he is on the autism spectrum. He has been here since mid-June and had only had one haircut since birth when he enrolled because the family couldn't keep him calm enough. He was here four weeks and the family was able to take him for a haircut. They have offered so many compliments about what our daycare, particularly structure, has done for this child. I feel some people are educated by our actions more than our words. The child will receive occupational, speech, etc. through the school system.
Reply
Cat Herder 09:38 AM 09-05-2019
Originally Posted by hwichlaz:
It's also silly to let your child's hair obscure their vision because YOU have a hang up about wanting long hair.
Not to mention the conjunctivitis transmission risk. Group care is different than being at home.
Reply
LysesKids 12:17 PM 09-07-2019
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
So I know in orthodox Jewish families, they dont do a hair cut till 3. Its cut in a ceremony known as upsherin. its a huge deal, theres a party, usually the parents gift the child their first torah. Our family cheated and I had a ceremony at age 2.
many American Indian families don't cut their boys hair; My oldest son is 1/2 Cherokee... he had a ponytail until age 25 when a Job required him to cut or not be management... I let him make the decision. I get it
Reply
LysesKids 12:23 PM 09-07-2019
Originally Posted by hwichlaz:
It's also silly to let your child's hair obscure their vision because YOU have a hang up about wanting long hair.
That's why ponytails... In Cherokee culture & many other Indian (American mind you) cultures, you don't cut the hair even if male...same with some Jewish; It's forbidden Deal with it.. My son had a ponytail at age 16 and his work didn't object
Reply
Blackcat31 12:45 PM 09-07-2019
Originally Posted by hwichlaz:
It's also silly to let your child's hair obscure their vision because YOU have a hang up about wanting long hair.
Just in case you didn’t notice but the post you quoted is from almost 7 yrs ago
Reply
knoxmomof2 05:18 AM 09-10-2019
I know this is an old post, but I just had a 3.5 year old DCB leave for JK3 at a "fancy" private preschool. Every day, he came here to my home daycare with ratty hair. I never said anything, just finger combed it after nap. They would get it trimmed, but it was still in his eyes and they never brushed it. I suspect he threw big fits for haircuts like he did for nail trimming (the kid had claws, it was disgusting) so they avoided them. One day, his Mom mentioned how they "hate to cut his beautiful curls". Apparently ratty hair is the same as "beautiful curls"...

I thought for sure once they sent him to the fancy preschool, they'd clean up his look. Mom is on my Facebook page, saw a picture of him at preschool this morning. Nope, same ratty hair / "beautiful curls"..... I just don't get how 2 well to do, highly educated people can think it's acceptable to send their child out in public looking like that. I figured they did it here because it's more laid back. Nope! Beautiful curls.... SMH. There weren't even that many curls, it was more snarls than anything.....
Reply
Ariana 06:20 AM 09-10-2019
Originally Posted by knoxmomof2:
I know this is an old post, but I just had a 3.5 year old DCB leave for JK3 at a "fancy" private preschool. Every day, he came here to my home daycare with ratty hair. I never said anything, just finger combed it after nap. They would get it trimmed, but it was still in his eyes and they never brushed it. I suspect he threw big fits for haircuts like he did for nail trimming (the kid had claws, it was disgusting) so they avoided them. One day, his Mom mentioned how they "hate to cut his beautiful curls". Apparently ratty hair is the same as "beautiful curls"...

I thought for sure once they sent him to the fancy preschool, they'd clean up his look. Mom is on my Facebook page, saw a picture of him at preschool this morning. Nope, same ratty hair / "beautiful curls"..... I just don't get how 2 well to do, highly educated people can think it's acceptable to send their child out in public looking like that. I figured they did it here because it's more laid back. Nope! Beautiful curls.... SMH. There weren't even that many curls, it was more snarls than anything.....
I’ve started putting kids hair up for this reason. It’s gross and they can’t see anything!!
Reply
Cat Herder 07:11 AM 09-10-2019
Originally Posted by Ariana:
I’ve started putting kids hair up for this reason. It’s gross and they can’t see anything!!
That is what I do, too. Boys and girls. I pull it back during that day for sanitary reasons. Keeping noses, mouths, hands, and eyes clean is important in group care. Flu season has already hit with a ferocity locally.
Reply
Former Teacher 09:01 AM 09-10-2019
A LONG time ago there was a little boy (he was around 2/3 years old) who had the LONGEST hair. It had some curls and waves but mostly it just hung on him. We did our best to him of course but Mom insisted she was NEVER going to cut his hair-at least until Kindergarten.

Well, it so happened that it was Picture Day. The Monday after the parents received their proofs, in comes DCB with a crew cut. I am like

Mom said she saw the pictures and she was utterly embarrassed. She didn't think his hair was THAT bad.

Umm lady...when you have how many people tell you to at least TRIM it....something isn't right!
Reply
Tags:2012, hair, hair cut
Reply Up