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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>What are your PROs and CONs
Cozy_Kids_Childcare 03:50 AM 04-06-2016
I'm a list person and I have started a pro/con list. I need to find out what it is driving my stress level up to change it to a positive. My diabetes is out of control and my doctor told me Monday that my stress level is not helping bring it back to normal and that I need to figure out where the high level of stress is. Stress is around us all, how do you handle it and turn all that negative into positive?
Josiegirl 04:04 AM 04-06-2016
Simple. Get rid of the stressors in your life. 
If only huh?
Can you boil it down to your top most stressful things? Is it your job in particular? Being home all the time, isolation, finances, certain kids or parents you dread, lack of social opportunities, etc?
What about incorporating yoga or meditation into your daily routine? Music to ease your soul by?
Everyone's life is so unique it's hard to help with turning negatives into positives unless we know which kind of negatives we're talking about. With most any stress though, you've got to find time for yourself in the equation because if you don't take care of YOU first, there will be little left to care for others. So do what so many providers don't do and that is Put Yourself FIRST!
And don't forget you can delegate responsibilities to others. And just say no sometimes.
If only huh?Can you boil it down to your top most stressful things? Is it your job in particular? Being home all the time, isolation, finances, certain kids or parents you dread, lack of social opportunities, etc?
What about incorporating yoga or meditation into your daily routine? Music to ease your soul by?
Everyone's life is so unique it's hard to help with turning negatives into positives unless we know which kind of negatives we're talking about. With most any stress though, you've got to find time for yourself in the equation because if you don't take care of YOU first, there will be little left to care for others. So do what so many providers don't do and that is Put Yourself FIRST!
And don't forget you can delegate responsibilities to others. And just say no sometimes.
Cozy_Kids_Childcare 04:11 AM 04-06-2016
Originally Posted by Josiegirl:
Simple. Get rid of the stressors in your life. If only huh?
Can you boil it down to your top most stressful things? Is it your job in particular? Being home all the time, isolation, finances, certain kids or parents you dread, lack of social opportunities, etc?
What about incorporating yoga or meditation into your daily routine? Music to ease your soul by?
Everyone's life is so unique it's hard to help with turning negatives into positives unless we know which kind of negatives we're talking about. With most any stress though, you've got to find time for yourself in the equation because if you don't take care of YOU first, there will be little left to care for others. So do what so many providers don't do and that is Put Yourself FIRST!
And don't forget you can delegate responsibilities to others. And just say no sometimes.
I'm in the process of pro/con list and making list of things that bother me and see what it would it take to turn that con into a pro.Simple. Get rid of the stressors in your life.
If only huh?Can you boil it down to your top most stressful things? Is it your job in particular? Being home all the time, isolation, finances, certain kids or parents you dread, lack of social opportunities, etc?
What about incorporating yoga or meditation into your daily routine? Music to ease your soul by?
Everyone's life is so unique it's hard to help with turning negatives into positives unless we know which kind of negatives we're talking about. With most any stress though, you've got to find time for yourself in the equation because if you don't take care of YOU first, there will be little left to care for others. So do what so many providers don't do and that is Put Yourself FIRST!
And don't forget you can delegate responsibilities to others. And just say no sometimes.
EntropyControlSpecialist 05:33 AM 04-06-2016
Originally Posted by Josiegirl:
Simple. Get rid of the stressors in your life. If only huh?
Can you boil it down to your top most stressful things? Is it your job in particular? Being home all the time, isolation, finances, certain kids or parents you dread, lack of social opportunities, etc?
What about incorporating yoga or meditation into your daily routine? Music to ease your soul by?
Everyone's life is so unique it's hard to help with turning negatives into positives unless we know which kind of negatives we're talking about. With most any stress though, you've got to find time for yourself in the equation because if you don't take care of YOU first, there will be little left to care for others. So do what so many providers don't do and that is Put Yourself FIRST!
And don't forget you can delegate responsibilities to others. And just say no sometimes.
The last two sentences are how I have started reducing my stress level. I just ask for help with one task a day and it greatly helps.Simple. Get rid of the stressors in your life.
If only huh?Can you boil it down to your top most stressful things? Is it your job in particular? Being home all the time, isolation, finances, certain kids or parents you dread, lack of social opportunities, etc?
What about incorporating yoga or meditation into your daily routine? Music to ease your soul by?
Everyone's life is so unique it's hard to help with turning negatives into positives unless we know which kind of negatives we're talking about. With most any stress though, you've got to find time for yourself in the equation because if you don't take care of YOU first, there will be little left to care for others. So do what so many providers don't do and that is Put Yourself FIRST!
And don't forget you can delegate responsibilities to others. And just say no sometimes.
I also need time alone to recharge my batteries. A full schedule can make me feel stressed for weeks, so I am trying to ensure I have plenty of down time now. Could any of these things work well for you? They seem so simple but help so much...
LysesKids 05:38 AM 04-06-2016
Originally Posted by Cozy_Kids_Childcare:
I'm in the process of pro/con list and making list of things that bother me and see what it would it take to turn that con into a pro.
I think Josie was saying that doing a few things in the meantime can help also to keep you from getting too frazzled;I would agree. I know for a fact that the Meditation/Relaxation CD's that are done by Liquid Mind works to keep me calm, but it's also great music for putting kids to sleep too lol (12 CD's in all)... it's easy to find some of the music on You Tube also where people took & put the music to pictures.I'm in the process of pro/con list and making list of things that bother me and see what it would it take to turn that con into a pro.
childcaremom 06:45 AM 04-06-2016
Some ideas:
If you find it hard to stay on top of housework, can you delegate some jobs to hubby, kids? Can you do a little bit each day? Can you afford to hire someone to come in once or twice a month?
Job stressors: Can you 'let go' of planning for a bit? Change things up? Let go of 'that one child/family' that stresses you?
Eating healthy: Can you do some meal prep on weekends? Prepare healthy snacks ahead of time so there is something appropriate ready-to-grab?
Stress free time: making time for you each day. I get up super early and have my coffee before anyone else wakes up. By myself. No one to talk to. I treasure this time.
Exercise. Great stress reducer. Going out for a walk each evening. Or getting up and doing it each morning.
Yoga class. (I'm a yoga teacher and I will always recommend this
) Beneficial on so many levels. There are so many varieties and it is truly for every body.
Meditation. So many benefits. Start with 2 minutes a day and work your way up. Don't want to do this? How about knitting or crocheting? Similar benefits. Your mind can relax and 'zone' out.
At nap time, I put on my yoga music. It instantly relaxes me. I have a tea. I may get a chance to do some yoga. You don't want to be around me if I miss this part of my day.
Sleep. Proper and adequate sleep is so important.
I think the key is to determine what causes you the most stress. Then ask yourself, what can I do to change it? If you can't change it, can you cut it out of your day? If you can't, can you change your mindset?
Also, incorporating some 'me time' throughout your day. Doesn't have to be long. Sprinkle that everywhere. 3-4 X a day. Coffee here. Walk there. Music/dance break now. Quiet break later.
Change isn't easy but sounds like it is imperative for you!
If you find it hard to stay on top of housework, can you delegate some jobs to hubby, kids? Can you do a little bit each day? Can you afford to hire someone to come in once or twice a month?
Job stressors: Can you 'let go' of planning for a bit? Change things up? Let go of 'that one child/family' that stresses you?
Eating healthy: Can you do some meal prep on weekends? Prepare healthy snacks ahead of time so there is something appropriate ready-to-grab?
Stress free time: making time for you each day. I get up super early and have my coffee before anyone else wakes up. By myself. No one to talk to. I treasure this time.
Exercise. Great stress reducer. Going out for a walk each evening. Or getting up and doing it each morning.
Yoga class. (I'm a yoga teacher and I will always recommend this
) Beneficial on so many levels. There are so many varieties and it is truly for every body.Meditation. So many benefits. Start with 2 minutes a day and work your way up. Don't want to do this? How about knitting or crocheting? Similar benefits. Your mind can relax and 'zone' out.
At nap time, I put on my yoga music. It instantly relaxes me. I have a tea. I may get a chance to do some yoga. You don't want to be around me if I miss this part of my day.
Sleep. Proper and adequate sleep is so important.
I think the key is to determine what causes you the most stress. Then ask yourself, what can I do to change it? If you can't change it, can you cut it out of your day? If you can't, can you change your mindset?
Also, incorporating some 'me time' throughout your day. Doesn't have to be long. Sprinkle that everywhere. 3-4 X a day. Coffee here. Walk there. Music/dance break now. Quiet break later.
Change isn't easy but sounds like it is imperative for you!
permanentvacation 06:58 AM 04-06-2016
I would suggest that you make a pro/con list for everyone, everything, and every activity in your life.
Your house (do you like the layout, is it too cluttered? Do you like the way you've decorated, etc. What does or does not cause you stress regarding your house?)
House chores (Do you feel overwhelmed with chores? Do you feel disorganized regarding house cleaning/chores? Do you feel like all you do is house chores? What does or does not cause you stress about doing house chores?)
Running errands (Are you overwhelmed or disorganized with your errands? Do you need to make a list of things to do, items to buy, places to go before you just run out the door only to return home and realize that you forgot something and have to run out again?)
Your spouse/significant other
If you are dating more than one person, make a pro/con list for each person you are dating
If you're single, make a pro/con list of being single
Your personal child/children
Each daycare child separately
Each daycare parent separately
Your personal daily routine ( the time you wake up, go to bed, the amount of hours of sleep you get, when you take your shower, everything you do other than your job)
Your job (your work hours, work schedule/routine, everything about your job)
If you have more than one job, list the pros/cons of working more than one job
Your pets
Also list your dreams, previous and/or current goals and whether or not you have accomplished them or are truly working towards accomplishing them and the pros/cons of having those dreams/goals.
Interests/hobbies ( Do you have any? Do you have time for them? Are you actually enjoying them?)
Also think back to when you weren't so stressed. Back to when you really enjoyed your life on a typical basis. What was different then? Are you able to get any aspect of your life back to the 'way it was when you were happier'? I know that things change, we have kids, more responsibility, bills, get divorced, etc. but is there anything that you used to do (a fun activity for yourself, a house cleaning routine, something different about doing daycare, etc.) that you used to do that you know made your life calmer that you can start doing again?
This might take a couple of days. But I did it. I made pro/con lists of every aspect of my life and was then able to see that I was bothered/stressed by a couple of different small details in a few different parts of my life. So I started making the changes that I needed to make in order to feel less stressed overall. My lists showed me that I needed to make drastic changes (some of them, completely stop that activity) for a couple of things and for other things, I just needed to make one or two small changes.
That's why I suggest making a separate list for each concept of your life. You will be able to focus completely on the pros and cons of each concept. Of course, some of the concepts might overlap each other, such as my pets being allowed into the daycare room while the kids are here (overlaps my pets and my job), but make sure to stay on the true concept of that list.
Once you have figured out what causes you stress in each category, make a list of everything that stresses you or that you have learned that you want to make changes about and list the changes that you honestly can make. Keep in mind that some changes will be things that you can do immediately and others will require time to change. But you can set a goal as to the change that you want and create a plan to work towards that goal.
For me, one thing that caused me stress was my pets being in the daycare room while the kids were more active. So, I simply immediately began putting my pets in bedrooms during those times of the day. Another stress for me was lack of income. So I started advertising my butt off and over the course of 3 months, I've gained 5 new daycare kids. Even though I was still stressed about income, putting my pets in rooms during more active times of daycare (and the other little changes I made immediately) really made a big difference in my stress level. And the fact that I was actively working towards getting more daycare kids gave me hope that I was going to relieve myself of that stress (lack of income) soon.
Your house (do you like the layout, is it too cluttered? Do you like the way you've decorated, etc. What does or does not cause you stress regarding your house?)
House chores (Do you feel overwhelmed with chores? Do you feel disorganized regarding house cleaning/chores? Do you feel like all you do is house chores? What does or does not cause you stress about doing house chores?)
Running errands (Are you overwhelmed or disorganized with your errands? Do you need to make a list of things to do, items to buy, places to go before you just run out the door only to return home and realize that you forgot something and have to run out again?)
Your spouse/significant other
If you are dating more than one person, make a pro/con list for each person you are dating
If you're single, make a pro/con list of being single
Your personal child/children
Each daycare child separately
Each daycare parent separately
Your personal daily routine ( the time you wake up, go to bed, the amount of hours of sleep you get, when you take your shower, everything you do other than your job)
Your job (your work hours, work schedule/routine, everything about your job)
If you have more than one job, list the pros/cons of working more than one job
Your pets
Also list your dreams, previous and/or current goals and whether or not you have accomplished them or are truly working towards accomplishing them and the pros/cons of having those dreams/goals.
Interests/hobbies ( Do you have any? Do you have time for them? Are you actually enjoying them?)
Also think back to when you weren't so stressed. Back to when you really enjoyed your life on a typical basis. What was different then? Are you able to get any aspect of your life back to the 'way it was when you were happier'? I know that things change, we have kids, more responsibility, bills, get divorced, etc. but is there anything that you used to do (a fun activity for yourself, a house cleaning routine, something different about doing daycare, etc.) that you used to do that you know made your life calmer that you can start doing again?
This might take a couple of days. But I did it. I made pro/con lists of every aspect of my life and was then able to see that I was bothered/stressed by a couple of different small details in a few different parts of my life. So I started making the changes that I needed to make in order to feel less stressed overall. My lists showed me that I needed to make drastic changes (some of them, completely stop that activity) for a couple of things and for other things, I just needed to make one or two small changes.
That's why I suggest making a separate list for each concept of your life. You will be able to focus completely on the pros and cons of each concept. Of course, some of the concepts might overlap each other, such as my pets being allowed into the daycare room while the kids are here (overlaps my pets and my job), but make sure to stay on the true concept of that list.
Once you have figured out what causes you stress in each category, make a list of everything that stresses you or that you have learned that you want to make changes about and list the changes that you honestly can make. Keep in mind that some changes will be things that you can do immediately and others will require time to change. But you can set a goal as to the change that you want and create a plan to work towards that goal.
For me, one thing that caused me stress was my pets being in the daycare room while the kids were more active. So, I simply immediately began putting my pets in bedrooms during those times of the day. Another stress for me was lack of income. So I started advertising my butt off and over the course of 3 months, I've gained 5 new daycare kids. Even though I was still stressed about income, putting my pets in rooms during more active times of daycare (and the other little changes I made immediately) really made a big difference in my stress level. And the fact that I was actively working towards getting more daycare kids gave me hope that I was going to relieve myself of that stress (lack of income) soon.
Ariana 09:19 AM 04-06-2016
I say his in every thread about stress because I believe it to be true 100%!
Stress comes from your thoughts about situations. Mainly it is that a situation SHOULD be a certain way and in reality it is not. I would recommend evaluating your stressful thoughts and questioning them.
For example a LOT of my stress came from the idea that parents expected me to do XYZ and if I didn't do XYZ I was a failure as an educator. When I evaluated those thoughts I realized that I knew more than the parents did about what is good for children (play) and I wasn't going to answer to anyone about the structure of my daycare. I stopped doing circle times and forcing art projects etc. I became a lot less stressed in the process. The parents didn't care! It was all in my head
A great website that is great for helping you question your thoughts is called The Work. Everything is free and it is absolutely amazing for turning any negative thoughts into positive thoughts. It has truly changed my life
Stress comes from your thoughts about situations. Mainly it is that a situation SHOULD be a certain way and in reality it is not. I would recommend evaluating your stressful thoughts and questioning them.
For example a LOT of my stress came from the idea that parents expected me to do XYZ and if I didn't do XYZ I was a failure as an educator. When I evaluated those thoughts I realized that I knew more than the parents did about what is good for children (play) and I wasn't going to answer to anyone about the structure of my daycare. I stopped doing circle times and forcing art projects etc. I became a lot less stressed in the process. The parents didn't care! It was all in my head
A great website that is great for helping you question your thoughts is called The Work. Everything is free and it is absolutely amazing for turning any negative thoughts into positive thoughts. It has truly changed my life
Cat Herder 09:30 AM 04-06-2016
I used to do the pro/cons list. 
I made up "Your balls, Our balls, My balls, Their balls" to be more effective.
(the order that I more naturally followed, IRL)
1. 4 big circles labeled as above above. 2. Any task that is currently on "your" list (aka "balls") should be categorized by whose task it SHOULD be in a perfect world. ---- See where I'm going with this?
3. Then prioritize the circles in the order of Mine, Ours, Yours, Theirs. 4. Over time, drop some balls ---- they were never yours anyway.
Leave other peoples balls alone.
I made up "Your balls, Our balls, My balls, Their balls" to be more effective.
(the order that I more naturally followed, IRL)1. 4 big circles labeled as above above. 2. Any task that is currently on "your" list (aka "balls") should be categorized by whose task it SHOULD be in a perfect world. ---- See where I'm going with this?
3. Then prioritize the circles in the order of Mine, Ours, Yours, Theirs. 4. Over time, drop some balls ---- they were never yours anyway.
Leave other peoples balls alone.
Cat Herder 09:36 AM 04-06-2016
Full disclosure: The overall concept is from a business leadership book under delegation of authority, I tweaked it added humor and some categories that suited my home/family/daycare.
EntropyControlSpecialist 10:43 AM 04-06-2016
Originally Posted by Cat Herder:
I used to do the pro/cons list.
I made up "Your balls, Our balls, My balls, Their balls" to be more effective. (the order that I more naturally followed, IRL)
1. 4 big circles labeled as above above. 2. Any task that is currently on "your" list (aka "balls") should be categorized by whose task it SHOULD be in a perfect world. ---- See where I'm going with this?
3. Then prioritize the circles in the order of Mine, Ours, Yours, Theirs. 4. Over time, drop some balls ---- they were never yours anyway.
Leave other peoples balls alone.
I used to do the pro/cons list.
I made up "Your balls, Our balls, My balls, Their balls" to be more effective.
(the order that I more naturally followed, IRL)1. 4 big circles labeled as above above. 2. Any task that is currently on "your" list (aka "balls") should be categorized by whose task it SHOULD be in a perfect world. ---- See where I'm going with this?
3. Then prioritize the circles in the order of Mine, Ours, Yours, Theirs. 4. Over time, drop some balls ---- they were never yours anyway.
Leave other peoples balls alone.
Love this.
Cat Herder 11:29 AM 04-06-2016
Originally Posted by EntropyControlSpecialist:
Love this.
Well, thanks... Love this. I am raising a pack of teen boys (to include a few neighborhood "loaners") over here; with a very over tasked/under rested husband ya'know.... 
Perspective and dark humor keep me going....