Daycare.com Forum
Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Three Year Old Needs Speech, etc...
Hunni Bee 09:56 PM 07-07-2011
I think I saw a similar thread to this one....sorry if Im doing repeat.
Im really hesitant to mention this to his mom because I know she'll just blow me off. But Im pretty sure this little guy would benefit from some help.
He's 3.5...January birthday. I don't know if anyone remembers, but he's the one I posted about a while ago who cursed all the time.
-He speaks rarely speaks in complete sentences. Strangers cannot understand his speech...really no one at the center but me can. He's still working with the vocabulary of a 2 year old. If he wants to say, "I want to ride the bike", he says "Wide bike" or "I thbhtthbh wide thththbth bike".
-He does not know what basic things are....like animals, tools, people (policemen, firefighters, etc) that most 3.5 year olds would be able to recognize...despite having being been exposed to them. He's been in care for the past two years.
-He has problems using his hands and fingers...he cant pull his pants up all the way, put on his shoes, has problems manipulating small parts or complicated toys, writing utensils, etc. I gave him half a banana and he couldn't grasp the peel to pull it down.
There are other problems too...if I say "Go hang up your jacket and push in your chair", he may do one, neither or do something like put his coat in the chair or try to hang up the chair on his jacket hook (no joke). His problem-solving skills are lacking...he just sat staring at the banana without trying to peel it for about 5 minutes before he starting calling me to do it.
He's a very social little boy despite his weak verbal skills and just adorable. I don't know if his problems are coming from a real delay or just a lack of interaction at home (which I'm pretty sure is a factor if not the cause).
Im really hesitant to mention this to his mom because I know she'll just blow me off. But Im pretty sure this little guy would benefit from some help.
He's 3.5...January birthday. I don't know if anyone remembers, but he's the one I posted about a while ago who cursed all the time.
-He speaks rarely speaks in complete sentences. Strangers cannot understand his speech...really no one at the center but me can. He's still working with the vocabulary of a 2 year old. If he wants to say, "I want to ride the bike", he says "Wide bike" or "I thbhtthbh wide thththbth bike".
-He does not know what basic things are....like animals, tools, people (policemen, firefighters, etc) that most 3.5 year olds would be able to recognize...despite having being been exposed to them. He's been in care for the past two years.
-He has problems using his hands and fingers...he cant pull his pants up all the way, put on his shoes, has problems manipulating small parts or complicated toys, writing utensils, etc. I gave him half a banana and he couldn't grasp the peel to pull it down.
There are other problems too...if I say "Go hang up your jacket and push in your chair", he may do one, neither or do something like put his coat in the chair or try to hang up the chair on his jacket hook (no joke). His problem-solving skills are lacking...he just sat staring at the banana without trying to peel it for about 5 minutes before he starting calling me to do it.
He's a very social little boy despite his weak verbal skills and just adorable. I don't know if his problems are coming from a real delay or just a lack of interaction at home (which I'm pretty sure is a factor if not the cause).
wdmmom 05:22 AM 07-08-2011
In Iowa, we have an agency that will test children for free and determine if they can benefit from their services. (Hearing, Speech, Individualized Education Plans, Early Learning, etc.)
See if you have a similar group and pass their name on or if you know someone that might work there, get their business card and send it home.
By the sounds of it, there isn't much you can do. Either you'll wind up torking DCM off or she just won't bother utilizing such a service.
Unfortunately until he goes to kindergarten round-up and teachers tell DCM that he is undeveloped, there probably isn't much anyone can say to get this DCM to listen and get the boy the help he needs.
See if you have a similar group and pass their name on or if you know someone that might work there, get their business card and send it home.
By the sounds of it, there isn't much you can do. Either you'll wind up torking DCM off or she just won't bother utilizing such a service.
Unfortunately until he goes to kindergarten round-up and teachers tell DCM that he is undeveloped, there probably isn't much anyone can say to get this DCM to listen and get the boy the help he needs.
Unregistered 06:34 AM 07-08-2011
My son was very close to what you are describing and he did need speech. There is so much testing that can be done on that little boy that could potentially change his life and it saddens me when a parent would not be willing to everything in their power to provide their child with the resources that are available.
If it were me I would suggest that the parent bring it up with their child's physician in a non-confrontational way. Many parents are in denial when a problem arises and they can become very defensive if they feel they are somehow to blame. I would simply point out that the child appears to be having a hard time communicating with his peers and the staff and that the physician may be able to provide some resources to help. If the physician is doing their job they can take it from there.
My son started speech when he was 2 (school therapist who came to my home 1x week), based solely on my observations and gut feeling as a mom. Unfortunately, the therapist spent most of the time watching Dora and not really giving him the help I felt he needed, so I turned to my Doctor. She was wonderful. For starters she had his hearing and eyes checked to rule out any physical issues that may be slowing down his progress. When those were cleared he was referred to a neurologist (he had some shaking occasionally and they wanted to rule out seizures) and a more qualified speech therapist. The speech therapist gave me so many great ideas to help his communication skills and expand his speech. He also saw an occupational therapist, which helped me learn how to deal with some of his sensory issues so he is now able to focus longer and participate more in groups.
He was also referred to CDC who has found that there is a possibility he has high-functioning autism and he has some sensory issues. While they have not officially diagnosed him with anything yet (they will wait until he is older and see how he is progressing, we also want to avoid labeling him) it has been a huge help for me to be able to understand better what he has to go through everyday and it has helped my frustrated husband become more patient.
He is now 4 1/2 and while he is still behind his peers, he has made significant progress in his, speech, langauge, and comprehension, and the gap is getting smaller. My other DC children can all understand him most of the time and they have short conversations. He participates in most group activities and now plays with his peers rather than alone. He is so much happier and I love waking up everyday and seeing him learn/do something new.
I truly believe that had I not got him the help when I did that he would be much farther behind his peers and starting school next year would have been such a huge struggle for him. It is a slow process and it takes a lot of work, time and patience, but it is worth it!
If it were me I would suggest that the parent bring it up with their child's physician in a non-confrontational way. Many parents are in denial when a problem arises and they can become very defensive if they feel they are somehow to blame. I would simply point out that the child appears to be having a hard time communicating with his peers and the staff and that the physician may be able to provide some resources to help. If the physician is doing their job they can take it from there.
My son started speech when he was 2 (school therapist who came to my home 1x week), based solely on my observations and gut feeling as a mom. Unfortunately, the therapist spent most of the time watching Dora and not really giving him the help I felt he needed, so I turned to my Doctor. She was wonderful. For starters she had his hearing and eyes checked to rule out any physical issues that may be slowing down his progress. When those were cleared he was referred to a neurologist (he had some shaking occasionally and they wanted to rule out seizures) and a more qualified speech therapist. The speech therapist gave me so many great ideas to help his communication skills and expand his speech. He also saw an occupational therapist, which helped me learn how to deal with some of his sensory issues so he is now able to focus longer and participate more in groups.
He was also referred to CDC who has found that there is a possibility he has high-functioning autism and he has some sensory issues. While they have not officially diagnosed him with anything yet (they will wait until he is older and see how he is progressing, we also want to avoid labeling him) it has been a huge help for me to be able to understand better what he has to go through everyday and it has helped my frustrated husband become more patient.
He is now 4 1/2 and while he is still behind his peers, he has made significant progress in his, speech, langauge, and comprehension, and the gap is getting smaller. My other DC children can all understand him most of the time and they have short conversations. He participates in most group activities and now plays with his peers rather than alone. He is so much happier and I love waking up everyday and seeing him learn/do something new.
I truly believe that had I not got him the help when I did that he would be much farther behind his peers and starting school next year would have been such a huge struggle for him. It is a slow process and it takes a lot of work, time and patience, but it is worth it!
MG&Lsmom 07:29 AM 07-08-2011
After a child's 3rd birthday it is the public school's responsibility to test and treat. Mom would have to call her school district and have him tested, then go through all their meetings etc to get him services. If she doesn't feel he needs services, I highly doubt she'll go through the process. It's very much unlike EI where they make access to services more pleasant. At least that's my experience.
Kaddidle Care 08:56 AM 07-08-2011
Perhaps print this page for her: http://www.healthychildren.org/engli...No+local+token
For younger children here is a page to select from: http://www.healthychildren.org/ENGLI...s/default.aspx
It pains me to see the frustration of a child that cannot be understood by his/her peers. It becomes meltdown city especially if the attending adult also cannot understand. I've seen it many times with younger children in families. Not the first, not the 2nd but the 3rd child.
For younger children here is a page to select from: http://www.healthychildren.org/ENGLI...s/default.aspx
It pains me to see the frustration of a child that cannot be understood by his/her peers. It becomes meltdown city especially if the attending adult also cannot understand. I've seen it many times with younger children in families. Not the first, not the 2nd but the 3rd child.
Cat Herder 09:11 AM 07-08-2011
Does you CCR&R offer an Inclusion Coordinator?
Ours will come out and evaluate him for free...in your home.
A bit of warning, though....all the documentation, home visits, monitoring, folllow through and scheduling will fall on you...not the parent. At least that is how it works here.
When a parent is not fully on board this can become all consuming and may even limit your ratios if they feel this child needs more of your time. Backing out is not an option. Termination would be HIGHLY risky as well.
You must comply, no choice from that point. Many small providers just can't afford to do this and I pray they will get the kinks out of that system soon. I know how wonderful it could be if they do.
I'd start with your CCR&R, just call and ask what services they offer. Gathering up your resources is ALWAYS a great idea anyway so you know where to turn in ANY situation you are presented.
Ours will come out and evaluate him for free...in your home.
A bit of warning, though....all the documentation, home visits, monitoring, folllow through and scheduling will fall on you...not the parent. At least that is how it works here.
When a parent is not fully on board this can become all consuming and may even limit your ratios if they feel this child needs more of your time.
Backing out is not an option. Termination would be HIGHLY risky as well.You must comply, no choice from that point. Many small providers just can't afford to do this and I pray they will get the kinks out of that system soon. I know how wonderful it could be if they do.
I'd start with your CCR&R, just call and ask what services they offer. Gathering up your resources is ALWAYS a great idea anyway so you know where to turn in ANY situation you are presented.
Hunni Bee 04:02 PM 07-08-2011
Im in a center by the way....
And we work very closely with a CCR&R, I could probably get loads of help for him...but it would all require her consent, which I doubt she'll give. I really don't even see that much of her...being that we provide transportation to and from the center, and she uses it.
I sent out surveys that the parents completed on their child's development, based on their age, a few months ago...I was happy when she agreed to do one, hoping she'd catch something. It had questions like "Can your child do x?" and you either marked yes, sometimes or not yet. She just checked yes for everything pretty much...stuff I know he can't do.
And Kadiddle Care, he's an only child...which I'm sure makes it worse because he has no one to bounce off of home. He cries when it's time to leave most days...
I know I've been avoiding asking some...I've put little notes on his weekly sheets asking how is his speech at home,etc., to which I've gotten no reply...but I know she'll either get angry or just blow the whole thing off
And we work very closely with a CCR&R, I could probably get loads of help for him...but it would all require her consent, which I doubt she'll give. I really don't even see that much of her...being that we provide transportation to and from the center, and she uses it.
I sent out surveys that the parents completed on their child's development, based on their age, a few months ago...I was happy when she agreed to do one, hoping she'd catch something. It had questions like "Can your child do x?" and you either marked yes, sometimes or not yet. She just checked yes for everything pretty much...stuff I know he can't do.
And Kadiddle Care, he's an only child...which I'm sure makes it worse because he has no one to bounce off of home. He cries when it's time to leave most days...
I know I've been avoiding asking some...I've put little notes on his weekly sheets asking how is his speech at home,etc., to which I've gotten no reply...but I know she'll either get angry or just blow the whole thing off
Hunni Bee 04:13 PM 07-08-2011
Originally Posted by Kaddidle Care:
Perhaps print this page for her: http://www.healthychildren.org/engli...No+local+token
For younger children here is a page to select from: http://www.healthychildren.org/ENGLI...s/default.aspx
It pains me to see the frustration of a child that cannot be understood by his/her peers. It becomes meltdown city especially if the attending adult also cannot understand. I've seen it many times with younger children in families. Not the first, not the 2nd but the 3rd child.
He truthfully does none of this. He attempts some of it, but not well. He can barely hold a pencil or crayon, and his coloring and drawing are just random squiggles, he can't hold the crayon well enough to really even scribble. He knows very few colors, shapes, etc...if you ask him what something is (picture of an animal, etc) he'll say his name.Perhaps print this page for her: http://www.healthychildren.org/engli...No+local+token
For younger children here is a page to select from: http://www.healthychildren.org/ENGLI...s/default.aspx
It pains me to see the frustration of a child that cannot be understood by his/her peers. It becomes meltdown city especially if the attending adult also cannot understand. I've seen it many times with younger children in families. Not the first, not the 2nd but the 3rd child.
But in other areas he excels....he potty-trained like a dream, he's very responsible with his belongings and his actions, he's a social butterfly, very good at reading faces and emotions...it's strange.