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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Holding It For Long Periods- PT (vent)
Lyss 11:55 AM 10-13-2013
This is more of a vent I think but advice from here is always good. Yesterday I get a fyi type email from DCM of 23 month DCG that she's decided to start the 3 day pt method this weekend as DCG is out Mon/tues so they have 4 days to work on it (then DCG would come with plastic covers til 1 week dry here, she knows I'm firm on this policy)

Anyway I just got a panicked text because DCG is holding it for long periods and DCM is getting frustrated. Apparently DCG got a snack and diaper change at 1am (just wet), woke up dry (at 8) and has yet to use potty or go at all as of now (11:45am). DCM says DCG is obviously uncomfortable and asking for a diaper. DCM said she had been giving her all the juice/milk she wants too, 3 sippy cups full of juice/water mix and 1/2 cup of milk since she got up.

I told her honesty I don't think DCG is ready then and she disagreed thinking that its because DCG is "diaper trained" and wants advice to make her go...

DCG is gonna end up with a uti or worse IMO. I'm really annoyed over the whole thing and a few other things she's pulled recently, plus I'm off the clock buddy! Right now I'm at "if you can't say anything nice..." blah!
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KidGrind 12:31 PM 10-13-2013

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Laurel 12:46 PM 10-13-2013
Parents don't have my email address and only one has my cell phone so I can text her pics of her child during the day. She only texts a thank you for the pics and a rare message that is not time sensitive.

I really wouldn't answer emails or texts over the weekend. That is nuts. If they want to call my landline then I would let them leave a message and if it is urgent, I'd call them but not for that.

People are so inconsiderate!!!!

Laurel
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daycarediva 12:55 PM 10-13-2013
Is she just refusing to go on the potty? Honestly, she sounds physically ready (waking up dry and holding it), just not mentally ready. I would respond "Good luck, let me know how she does the rest of the long weekend. See you Wednesday!" and leave it at that.
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Lyss 01:14 PM 10-13-2013
Originally Posted by Laurel:
Parents don't have my email address and only one has my cell phone so I can text her pics of her child during the day. She only texts a thank you for the pics and a rare message that is not time sensitive.

I really wouldn't answer emails or texts over the weekend. That is nuts. If they want to call my landline then I would let them leave a message and if it is urgent, I'd call them but not for that.

People are so inconsiderate!!!!

Laurel
I have a DC specific email address, none have access to my personal one, but they all pop through to my phone so I know when I get an email. I didn't respond to her fyi email about starting it but the text I did, dumb I know

Occasionally I get texts during the week from her, but this is the first weekend one that I can remember in probably 6 months. Either way it's annoying.

This DCM is very... sensitive, so I have to be very cautious about how I word things (especially via text/email) and I turn my brain off on the weekends!

Originally Posted by daycarediva:
Is she just refusing to go on the potty? Honestly, she sounds physically ready (waking up dry and holding it), just not mentally ready. I would respond "Good luck, let me know how she does the rest of the long weekend. See you Wednesday!" and leave it at that.
This is basically what I'm going to say! DCM said she's never woke up dry before but that she held it like this all day yesterday, only going twice (naptime and the 1am snack/change), and was crying in pain & asking for her diaper all afternoon/evening. She says she's terrified of the potty chair now. This is their 2nd try at the 3 day method.

DCG is very verbal for her age, but emotional she's a bit younger. She's VERY babied at home.

I'd almost like to be a fly on the wall right now, I'm sure DCM is in tears.
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momofboys 03:56 PM 10-13-2013
I personally wouldn't have bothered to respond - why is it your job to help them with PT that takes place at home?! If I had responded at all it would have been to say - I will talk to you on Monday about this.
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JoseyJo 04:28 PM 10-13-2013
Originally Posted by Lyss:
DCM said she's never woke up dry before but that she held it like this all day yesterday, only going twice (naptime and the 1am snack/change), and was crying in pain & asking for her diaper all afternoon/evening. She says she's terrified of the potty chair now. This is their 2nd try at the 3 day method.
Sounds like something I wouldn't want to be a part of for sure! No matter how you respond she is going to not like the answer.
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Blackcat31 04:58 PM 10-13-2013
Originally Posted by Lyss:

DCG is very verbal for her age, but emotional she's a bit younger. She's VERY babied at home.

I'd almost like to be a fly on the wall right now, I'm sure DCM is in tears.
I bet DCG is perfectly capable of going but from her perspective "what a wonderful opportunity to have a power struggle with someone who has taught me that I am the boss."

If DCM is emotional about this, the DCG is pick up on that and either take it as pressure or a sign of mom's anxiousness over the whole process.

I also think the over zealous pushing of liquids is probably not a good idea.

I'd stay out of it but I would support mom by maybe linking her to NannyDe's blog about potty training. https://www.daycare.com/nannyde/pott...m#comment-5493

I have a hard time with parents who PUSH their kids to do things that should be obvious as to when a child is ready.
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Maddy'sMommy 05:40 PM 10-13-2013
This was my daughter when we first tried potty-training. She got pee on her leg once and then held it for 24 hours. I put her back in diapers, waited a month, and then tried again. Next time we tried she was day and night time trained within a week. She was 33 months the first time we tried, then 34 when it worked. (She turns 3 this week).

She may not be ready, I would advise to back off for a bit. She's not even 2 yet, and some kids are just not ready at that age.
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Cradle2crayons 06:54 PM 10-13-2013
I've had a few kids try to hold it. I just cut the water on in the bathroom sink and bathtub after I sit them on the toilet and they usually can't hold it after that.

We use that technique in the hospital after we remove catheters and the patients are scared to pee the first time after removal. Works like a charm.
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Childminder 07:06 PM 10-13-2013
Put her hand in a cup of warm water while the faucets are running and mom could try pouring some warm water in between her legs.
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JoseyJo 07:40 PM 10-13-2013
Just realized that she isnt even 2 yet Poor DCG, why is mom rushing so much?? I totally get that some are ready at that age, but if she isn't she isn't! She's gonna grow up with a phobia of the toilet!!
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Lyss 09:12 PM 10-13-2013
DCD is going to be home alone more with DCG this fall/winter (2 days a week ) and is over diapers. He's really pushing (but not helping) DCM to get her trained.

DCG has mom trained & runs that house, she becomes a totally different kid as soon as DCM walks through the door. I'm sure it's been a rough 2 days for DCM.

Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
I bet DCG is perfectly capable of going but from her perspective "what a wonderful opportunity to have a power struggle with someone who has taught me that I am the boss."

If DCM is emotional about this, the DCG is pick up on that and either take it as pressure or a sign of mom's anxiousness over the whole process.

I also think the over zealous pushing of liquids is probably not a good idea.

I'd stay out of it but I would support mom by maybe linking her to NannyDe's blog about potty training. https://www.daycare.com/nannyde/pott...m#comment-5493

I have a hard time with parents who PUSH their kids to do things that should be obvious as to when a child is ready.
I had a conversation with DCM last time they tried the 3 day method (2 months ago) and told her they can try what they want at home but I'm not pushing her here. DCD was a little snotty about it, until I confronted him about it, but DCM was ok and even brought trainers & Pull ups the Friday before they started it. But it didn't work out that time either (she just constantly peed all over, I think they got 3 "hits" on the potty in 4 days so DCM stopped.

They are an odd mix of trying to push her to excel and babying her. She can count to 11 because DCM drills her every night (not that she has any idea what each number value is or can recognize them) and asked if I'd start a preschool program with her already (no) but then they talk to her like a baby and do everything for her.
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Tags:inconsiderate, parent - interruptions
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