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Mom4two 07:52 PM 11-23-2010
Ok, Hello to everybody before I get started.....

I have a child that I am fairly new with. We are in a trial period right now, All in all this child is good.He has a unique situation though. The mom told me that he had tubes put into the ears, the tubes got clogged, in return he couldn't hear that well, then tubes came out and now he is highly sensitive to sound. When he hears a sound that he can not stand, he goes into an instant tantrum. He loves Thomas the train and the movie music does not seem to bother him when that is on, but today when I showed a video of Barney, he went crazy. He does not like it even when we sing softly. I don't know how to help him to over come this. next year he starts kindergarten and these things with music is to be expected. How can I help him to make music and sounds a fun thing rather then be bothersome to him?

any advice is really appreciated, Thanks
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SilverSabre25 08:13 PM 11-23-2010
Honestly, that sounds like something she needs to bring up to his doctor. It could be a sensory issue like sensory processing disorder (certain sounds often bother kids with SPD), but it could also just be that he needs some sort of OT to help him overcome this difficulty after having his hearing so limited for so long.

So basically, I think you need to bring it up to the mom--present it to her as you having noticed this difficulty and it really seems to be affecting his ability to function, and you're concerned about school next year. Suggest that she speak to his doctor about it, or contact the school for an evaluation.
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QualiTcare 09:21 PM 11-23-2010
it's possible that he could have an auditory issue, but i wouldn't write everything else off.

my son quit bible school after the first day because "those stupid songs made his belly hurt."

when we're in the car, sometimes the music will be loud bc his sister will say turn it up! and he'll sing along at the top of his lungs. the next day, same music, it's "turn it down!" and he's being a total brat about it - crying and all. an outsider would think something is "wrong" if they only saw the flip side, but i'm not in denial. there's never anything wrong when he's screaming at the top of his lungs, blasting a song he likes, or banging on something long enough to make you want to pull your ears off.

i would just watch for signs (like you said he liked the thomas the train music, but not barney). he doesn't like soft singing, but what does he do when a kid is screaming at the top of their lungs?

i'm sure i'll get flack for saying this, but too many people want to think something is "wrong" because their kids throw tantrums when there's really nothing wrong other than the fact they aren't getting their way. for example, acting like a wild animal when a song they like is shaking the walls but having an aching belly and covering their ears when it's something they don't like.

question - did the mother tell you about his sensitivity to sound from the beginning, or was it after you mentioned he threw tantrums or seemed sensitive?
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Francine 03:53 AM 11-24-2010
I would watch it for a while before doing/saying anything. My daugther had tubes in her ears and was very sensitive to noise but it was loud noises.....fire trucks, fire alarms, marching bands etc. Having a tantrum over one song playing verses another seems a bit fishy to me.
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DancingQueen 05:20 AM 11-24-2010
Originally Posted by :
when we're in the car, sometimes the music will be loud bc his sister will say turn it up! and he'll sing along at the top of his lungs. the next day, same music, it's "turn it down!" and he's being a total brat about it - crying and all. an outsider would think something is "wrong" if they only saw the flip side, but i'm not in denial. there's never anything wrong when he's screaming at the top of his lungs, blasting a song he likes, or banging on something long enough to make you want to pull your ears off.
That is classic sensory processing right there.
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Pammie 05:51 AM 11-24-2010
I think what you're describing is typical of children going through the same situation with tubes/temporary hearing loss/restored hearing. I've had MANY children in my care go through the same thing - and I have never been able to figure out why some noises are irritating to them and others aren't?? But since these kids have gone through a period of time when they weren't hearing well, it's not surprising that certain noise would be scary or irritating to them. I had one little girl that after her hearing returned, totally freaked out when she heard footsteps (try and keep a houseful of kids walking silently) Another little guy had a tantrum anytime a child would play with a particular music-box-toy.

I've never understood why some noises are bothersome and some aren't - maybe the pitch/frequency?? But I have had success helping the kids manage themselves by first, trying to alert them when a bothersome noise was going to occur - as with the music box, even the other kids would tell the little guy before they played with it And then I offered the child a pair of soft, fuzzy earmuffs that they could wear to buffer the noise if they so chose. After awhile, each and every kid de-sensitized themselves to the bothersome noises and no longer freaked, or needed their ear muffs.
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SilverSabre25 05:53 AM 11-24-2010
Originally Posted by DancingQueen:
That is classic sensory processing right there.
Ditto. With my nephew, it wasn't all sounds, all the time, and he sure can/could make a heck of a lot of noise himself without it bothering him! But out of nowhere he'd be yelling for everyone else to be quiet, he hated to have people singing around him (there was one birthday where we didn't sing Happy Birthday to him because singing made him freak out).
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BentleysBands 05:55 AM 11-24-2010
sounds very normal after tubes. my dd had same issue. with speech and ot she was fine. does not mean he has a problem.
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SilverSabre25 06:00 AM 11-24-2010
Originally Posted by BentleysBands:
sounds very normal after tubes. my dd had same issue. with speech and ot she was fine. does not mean he has a problem.
But you say that she did get st and ot. She wouldn't have had the therapies if there wasn't a problem, kwim? I think what you mean is that it doesn't mean that there's a sensory issue. The boy in the OP might not be getting those services and it still needs checked in to--just to make sure, for his sake. If he is getting the services, the caregiver needs to know.
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BentleysBands 06:06 AM 11-24-2010
sorry i meant like a major issue. once she got speech therapy she took off...its very normal with tubes we were told...just frustrates me when a child acts out over things and ppl are so quick to think somethings wrong....too many kids on meds now adays or being labeled....jmho
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Mom4two 07:30 AM 11-24-2010
Originally Posted by QualiTcare:
it's possible that he could have an auditory issue, but i wouldn't write everything else off.

question - did the mother tell you about his sensitivity to sound from the beginning, or was it after you mentioned he threw tantrums or seemed sensitive?
The Mother did tell me about the sensitivity to sound at the beginning only because when we had them over to see how he would be around my son, my son turned on a battery operated train and he went nuts over that sound. That is when she told me about what happened with the tubes in his ears. She also said that the doctors think it will pass.

My personal observation though is that what you said, seems to me that he can scream and make loud noises himself along with my son and that don't seem to bother him. The mother was telling me about his ear situation in front of him, (Children are really smart) I think a part of it is he is playing it up. but when I put a video of Thomas to watch or any video he sits with his fingers behind his ears pressing in. I have no idea why he is doing that. Then the following day I put Barney on for Manners and he goes crazy. I don't get it. other than sometimes I think he is just playing the part to get his way. He was in a daycare with lots of children and had a hard time there, so the mother is thinking that my place seems to be better because of not having too may children and the noise factor. I just want this boy to be ok with music and sounds and see that these things are fun.

I do like the Idea of ear muffs. I am going to pick some up this weekend to see if that helps any.
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Mom4two 07:46 AM 11-24-2010
Originally Posted by Pammie:
I think what you're describing is typical of children going through the same situation with tubes/temporary hearing loss/restored hearing. I've had MANY children in my care go through the same thing - and I have never been able to figure out why some noises are irritating to them and others aren't?? But since these kids have gone through a period of time when they weren't hearing well, it's not surprising that certain noise would be scary or irritating to them. I had one little girl that after her hearing returned, totally freaked out when she heard footsteps (try and keep a houseful of kids walking silently) Another little guy had a tantrum anytime a child would play with a particular music-box-toy.

I've never understood why some noises are bothersome and some aren't - maybe the pitch/frequency?? But I have had success helping the kids manage themselves by first, trying to alert them when a bothersome noise was going to occur - as with the music box, even the other kids would tell the little guy before they played with it And then I offered the child a pair of soft, fuzzy earmuffs that they could wear to buffer the noise if they so chose. After awhile, each and every kid de-sensitized themselves to the bothersome noises and no longer freaked, or needed their ear muffs.
I am glad that I am not the only one to go through this, I like that idea about the ear muffs, I think I will go and pick some up of different colors and have him choose a pair to wear for times that sound is bothersome. Thanks for the idea.
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kathiemarie 09:04 AM 11-24-2010
This is what happen to me. I was hard of hearing for most of my late teenage years to about 38...lets say 20 years. (hearing aids in both ears.) I had surgery that restored my hearing. Talk about a gift and curse. It took me several YEARS to be able to handle all the noise in the world. Some sounds still set me "off". And when I'm overly tired it is even worse. I use ear plugs on the bad days. So here is a 43 year old who knows what to do and what to expect with noise who still get "testy" with loud sounds (yes some tones I can handle better than others.) How do we expect a young child to adapt quickly aftering a hearing loss? We are clam, and offer tools to help them. The ear muffs are a great idea and if you have space have a quite spot he can go to when things are over bearing for him that will be helpful too.
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QualiTcare 01:33 PM 11-24-2010
Originally Posted by DancingQueen:
That is classic sensory processing right there.
he's had his hearing checked and they said he's fine. he sat there like a statue with no change of expression the whole time.

Bentleysbands - i agree. that was my point too. they always have to have ADHD or some kind of disorder. they used to just be called brats and get a spanking - disorder cured!
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Lilbutterflie 01:53 PM 11-24-2010
Originally Posted by kathiemarie:
This is what happen to me. I was hard of hearing for most of my late teenage years to about 38...lets say 20 years. (hearing aids in both ears.) I had surgery that restored my hearing. Talk about a gift and curse. It took me several YEARS to be able to handle all the noise in the world. Some sounds still set me "off". And when I'm overly tired it is even worse. I use ear plugs on the bad days. So here is a 43 year old who knows what to do and what to expect with noise who still get "testy" with loud sounds (yes some tones I can handle better than others.) How do we expect a young child to adapt quickly aftering a hearing loss? We are clam, and offer tools to help them. The ear muffs are a great idea and if you have space have a quite spot he can go to when things are over bearing for him that will be helpful too.
Wow. I can't imagine! Thanks for offering your experience to help the OP understand what the child may be going through.
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