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Old 08-16-2017, 07:20 PM
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Unhappy Am I Over Reacting?

So I know I'm conpelelty over reacting, but I am one who takes everything personal and it greatly upsets me if there is any conflict or anything in that nature. So basically our new ( 2 weeks) assistant director came in our room and said we had a compliant that the evening workers weren't as "good" as the morning, that children were going home with dirty noses and bottoms red. My very invasive co worker proceeded to annoy my assistant director until she told her who the parent was. Now some back ground I have worked there for 2 1/2 years and Friday is my last day due to school. I also work 10-6 and have worked the morning and evenings previously. I work in the 2 year old room til 3 and then the baby room til 4 and then all the kids combine and we all (3-4 teachers) watch the remaining children until 6. So to continue the parent who complained is a parent in the baby room( so of course my heart sank). The parent is SOOOO nice always telling me how much she loved me. Now also my assistant director went to everyone and told them of the compliant and to be sure we are checking children before they leave and that we are very interactive. The parent who complained's husband has picked up the child this past week and so he did make mention that her nose was dirty when picking her up. But I know I always change her at 4( every 2 hours) and then try to always check her before her parent gets there( unless she has pooped) so as far as her bottom being red I have no idea why. She has been out of diapers and been using other children's diapers. Anyway, the parent was super nice I heard when she complained and was just letting our director know. She didn't even mention anyone's name or anything ( honestly I don't think she even knows who is in there in the evenings since we all are combined when she picks her up). I'm thinking the compliant was actually her husband and she was just the one who relayed it to our director, who told our assistant, who then told us. I don't know why but it has just bothered me- I guess I feel like they may think I'm not taking care of her as good( even though they didn't mention me) I know I'm the one in there and I know I alway change her and all. In terms of interaction she likes to play by her self a lot and has no interest in playing with us. I know they were worried about her being in there with older kids. I basically just want to know if anyone else would feel the way I do or if I am just over reacting a ton. I'm just so bothered by it.
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Old 08-16-2017, 07:52 PM
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laundrymom laundrymom is offline
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I'd mention to your director that she was out of diapers so you used someone else's and maybe she had a reaction. Have her relay to mom to bring diapers in case that's why she was red and move on. And honestly, kids get dirty playing. If her nose is dirty at pickup give dad a tissue.
Don't stress.
Life's too short.
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Old 08-16-2017, 08:03 PM
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Originally Posted by laundrymom View Post
I'd mention to your director that she was out of diapers so you used someone else's and maybe she had a reaction. Have her relay to mom to bring diapers in case that's why she was red and move on. And honestly, kids get dirty playing. If her nose is dirty at pickup give dad a tissue.
Don't stress.
Life's too short.
I'm not the main teacher in her class( only in there for an hour when the lead teachers leave) so I didn't directly leave her a note but she did have one about the diapers. That's what everyone has told me- I'm just a worry wart! But thank you!! Always help for an outside source to tell you not to stress!
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Old 08-16-2017, 09:48 PM
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I wouldn't sweat it, you aren't the child's main teacher. If mom has gone out of her way to be kind to you that would be enough for me right there. I used to work in a center although I worked with school agers but it is so easy for those parents to just not care as they are used to see many different faces, specifically in the evenings when the main leads have left for the day . If she made the effort to mention how much she loves you I wouldn't lose sleep over it. Enjoy your last few days with the kids, don't let it preoccupy your thoughts.
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Old 08-16-2017, 09:53 PM
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racemom racemom is offline Member
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It's hard when a parent complains about something you feel responsible. I would just double check her diaper and wipe her face right before expected pick-up and move on. It is a very small thing, don't stress but I do try to please parents who have things that bother them.

I have one parent that complains if her child's legs are dirty when she picks up, simple solution, everyone gets a baby wipe and we wipe our legs off when we come in from outside. She's happy, the kids are enjoying it, and I am not stressing about it. It's a small thing to me, but if it matters to mom, and doesn't cause problems for me, I will do it.

Also, if she is out of diapers still tomorrow, I would mention to dad that her bottom seemed red when you changed her, and you wonder if she is having a reaction because you have had to put her in a different brand of diaper than they use. Passive/aggressive I know, but that's how I am.
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Old 08-17-2017, 03:13 AM
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Knowing my own personality, I'd probably be one to stress over it and analyze it all. What pps said, life's too short. Do dcps expect to pick up their child in the same condition they dropped them off in? Please try not to dwell on it, get through the rest of your time there and keep smiling. You know you're doing all that you can to keep those children clean, healthy, fed, and happy. We cannot control how every single parents reacts.

We're sometimes still outside playing when a parent comes early. One day a dcm picked up and her dd was very dirty. Hey what can I say...she plays hard and dirt doesn't scare her. She said something about her being so dirty so I sent a note home the very next day, telling parents they can use the bathroom to clean their child up, or use baby wipes(I bring them outside too), etc., if we happen to be outside when their child gets picked up. She asked me if it was because of what she said and I said oh not at all, because she didn't mean anything by it.
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Old 08-17-2017, 07:53 AM
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Try not to overthink it.
It's just the nature of the business.

As mentioned above, I would address the diaper issue.
If the center requires parents to supply diapers- they should not be getting away with using other family's supplies.
Me: I'd say it directly to the parent though (not the director), but that's me. Going to the director is fine too, as long as you are confident the message will be relayed.

IMHO- if the child's bottom isn't red on your watch or when she leaves, it's likely the parent's not changing her after pick up or until well after dinner and passing off the blame.

The dirty nose: that sounds like the child probably has a cold and is wiping it (wet and attracting dirt). I ALWAYS point out when I notice cold symptoms to the parent.
If it's that big of a deal that the child's nose be spotless, they should keep the child home when she has a cold.
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Old 08-17-2017, 07:57 AM
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sounds since like you work as a team, it should be the full teams fault and not one person directly.

Unless someone pointed you out directly, I wouldn't stress over it and just work with your team to try and do you best to fix the issues.

You sound like a complete sweetheart...
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Old 08-17-2017, 08:59 AM
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Makes me wonder if Dad picked up, didn't change the kid, and when Mom got home and complained of the red butt, Dad blamed it on daycare. I've had 2 dads who have sent their kids back to me in the same diapers that their kids have left my home in the day before! NOT that all men would do that, but I know that there are plenty who will! After telling the moms about the kids coming back in the same diapers, it quit happening with both dads, but it happened 2 times with one, 3 with the other before I told mom and it never happened again.

I would DEFINITELY insist that they brought diapers, though! I'd also tell them that they need to bring a second box to pay back the parents for the ones that they've used from other kids' diapers!
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Old 08-17-2017, 11:34 AM
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There are people in this world who would complain about too many sprinkles on their ice cream literally! I would wonder why this person did not have the courage to talk to the teachers face to face to address the issue but went straight to the director

People like this annoy me. They love to complain and expect perfection from everyone around them, meanwhile the red bum might be something that is happening at home. I had a mom who contacted me on Saturday to ask about food on Friday because her kid had diarrhea! He ate a total of 2 lunches and 4 snacks with me and 3 lunches, 5 breakfasts, 5 dinners and 6 snacks with her that week
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over reacting

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