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RachelDaycare 06:45 AM 06-06-2011
You all know the kid. The one that gets within your eyesight and pushes a button over and over till you want to scream.
I have a little girl who is three and a half. I have had her and her sister for a few months now. Very bright little girl. but.... she is in my space alot. Termination is not what I am looking at, she is not a bad kid, just attention seeking. They have been in two other daycares before me, one the mom worked at so the kids went with her, the other the kids just didn't like and would scream everyday at drop off. Her sister will be two in a couple of weeks. They are the first dropped off three days a week. I feel anxiety build up within that first half hour and I know it is my stuff not hers.
Like I said she is a good girl, just attention seeking.
Last week she pooped in her pants when we were playing outside. She has been doing that at home too. So the following day I gave her a sticker for pooping in the toilet.
With her I think it is the old catching her being good and ignoring the annoying stuff as long as no one is getting hurt.
Any other thoughts
thanks
Rachel
p.s I have had this issue before, with other kids. I think one of the things is that I am very sensitive to noise, so loud kids are often overstimulating for me. No fault of their own, I really like this little girl and want to have a great long relationship with them
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wdmmom 01:51 PM 06-06-2011
The only way this kind of behavior is going to stop is for you to set the rules and MAKE her follow them. If that means you have to be up her butt from dawn til dusk, so be it. You need to tell her NO and stick with it. Sounds to me like a classic case of "Go Play Toys" is in order! She needs to learn to entertain herself and avoid all of the other temptations. Carry on a conversation, teach her new things, read books, etc. and make her use the restroom before going outside.

If you don't want to have a conversation, tell her to go play toys.

If she's doing something she's not suppose to, tell her to go play toys.

If she doesn't want to eat lunch, than go play toys.

If she doesn't want to go play toys, make her sit. Then she'll be wishing she would have just played toys.
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dEHmom 06:04 AM 06-07-2011
you know, i was sitting here and something dawned on me because of the little 14 mth old i have who constantly is drawn to things i take away. then when you go to come grab it from him (broom or something) he runs and throws it.

he knows better, he's still young, but he knows what he is allowed to play with and what he is not allowed to. like he is always in my fish tank cupboard, there is nothing to harm him, although i don't think fish food would taste good.

anyways, i could hear him in the cupboard but did not look, i said *** please put that back, and he did, i heard him shut the cupboard, and knew he was standing staring at me (i can see his reflection in the glass).

i was about to say "good boy!" when he put it in the cupboard but realized that i would be reinforcing the bad behavior!

i think lots of us say good boy/girl when they do something good right after doing something bad. so they know, if i do something bad, correct it, i will be told im good.

am i wrong?
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My Daycare 06:23 AM 06-07-2011
Originally Posted by dEHmom:
you know, i was sitting here and something dawned on me because of the little 14 mth old i have who constantly is drawn to things i take away. then when you go to come grab it from him (broom or something) he runs and throws it.

he knows better, he's still young, but he knows what he is allowed to play with and what he is not allowed to. like he is always in my fish tank cupboard, there is nothing to harm him, although i don't think fish food would taste good.

anyways, i could hear him in the cupboard but did not look, i said *** please put that back, and he did, i heard him shut the cupboard, and knew he was standing staring at me (i can see his reflection in the glass).

i was about to say "good boy!" when he put it in the cupboard but realized that i would be reinforcing the bad behavior!

i think lots of us say good boy/girl when they do something good right after doing something bad. so they know, if i do something bad, correct it, i will be told im good.

am i wrong?
I think you are right.

I do this in a similar way when a child has something that I want for some reason. I put my hand out and say, "thank you." They always give it to me and run off, but maybe I shouldn't say "thank you" because they were misusing something or had something that they were not supposed to have.
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Hunni Bee 08:52 PM 06-07-2011
Originally Posted by dEHmom:
you know, i was sitting here and something dawned on me because of the little 14 mth old i have who constantly is drawn to things i take away. then when you go to come grab it from him (broom or something) he runs and throws it.

he knows better, he's still young, but he knows what he is allowed to play with and what he is not allowed to. like he is always in my fish tank cupboard, there is nothing to harm him, although i don't think fish food would taste good.

anyways, i could hear him in the cupboard but did not look, i said *** please put that back, and he did, i heard him shut the cupboard, and knew he was standing staring at me (i can see his reflection in the glass).

i was about to say "good boy!" when he put it in the cupboard but realized that i would be reinforcing the bad behavior!

i think lots of us say good boy/girl when they do something good right after doing something bad. so they know, if i do something bad, correct it, i will be told im good.

am i wrong?
No, you're right...I have a kid like that...except he just turned four. I realized I have to give directions and walk away immediately. If I said, Please pick up the toys you threw, and stood there looking at him waiting for him to do it...he might've done anything- threw them at me or other kids, balled up on the floor and started crying, stood there for 15 minutes glaring at me... (he has some other behavioral issues as well)

But I said the same thing and walked away, I would peek back and he'd be picking up the toys. But if I came back and said, Thank you...they might end up back on the floor.

Giving very succinct instructions and then withdrawing attention immediately worked for him. He's much better now.
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Tags:attention seeking, behavior problems
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