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Old 08-04-2011, 09:34 AM
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Christian Mother Christian Mother is offline
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Default Pregnant Mom Having A Hard Time At Pick-ups And Drop Offs...

I know there is a lot of posts on here about it and some really good advice but I need to go back to square one i think...

Here's my problem...I love NannyD's Changing of the Guards Blog but I have trouble I think with some of it bc the child who is acting out right now with drop of and pick ups just started this and is 2yrs old. Mom is pregnant and due in Nov. had a miscarriage with her previous pregnancy. She's been spotting through out this pregnancy so she's been trying to take it easy with her son. Which I think has helped create this child taking advantage of the parent thing...Mom is doing what she can to stop the behavior and discipline which is what i am looking for bc if it isn't taken care of right away it will escalate. Do you think I should just ask mom to leave him at my door in the morning and I take him from there that way mom doesn't have to come in. It seems like this is where the bad behavior begins and ends. The mom and I like to discuss things at drop off for a few min. and it's becoming diff. bc of his behavior. I would love to give her a copy of Nanny's Changing of the Guard but feel like she'd take it wrong bc she is the parent in all ways but since she is pregnant she's been tired and also limited. She is able to pick her son up bc he's a big boy and disciplining her creates stress on the baby. Let me just note that she does discipline but she isn't able to do it to the fullest. Can you give me some help...pointers please?
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Old 08-04-2011, 09:56 AM
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I would tell her that conferences at pick-up are becoming too difficult to manage and that you will set aside a time from *** to *** to discuss his day over the phone, set up a weekly face to face conference time OR will begin to supply a daily sheet for her.

Drop-off and pick-ups are not time for conferences here, ever. I do drop-offs and pickup's at the door. I have other childen in care and need to get back to them quickly.

My playroom is at the very back of my home and having them walk through my families private space on a daily basis does not work for me. None of my parents have a problem with that.

I do post pictures for the parents of our activities weekly, text photos constantly and welcome them to come earlier in the day (before DH and my kids get home) if they want to see the room or their child. They must take their child with them when they leave.

No one has ever wanted to once given the option.

I do not give parents accesss to other children, however. My parents would never go for that. They can hang out in my kitchen overlooking the playroom without interfering or sit in my living room and just listen, their choice.
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Old 08-04-2011, 01:00 PM
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Thank you!! I have a basement home so the daycare is located ashually up stairs where the kitchen is. My stairs are gated so the kids and parents who walk in walk directly up the stairs to the gate and then I let them into daycare. We normally don't have a "conference" for anything but this week since she has started working at a new school she isn't sure on pick up or drop off bc of meetings and such. We are both feeling it out. She has been also helping me with my daughter as she has a speech impairment so she comes at pick up and directly works with her. That surprisingly doesn't seem to be a problem with DCB but in the mornings it's been kind of rough for everyone involved. I think maybe I need to greet at the door take DCB and they say goodbyes right there so once I have him in hand i can take care of it from there. I will have to try that tomorrow to see how that works out. Thanks Catherder for your advice!! I appreciate it!!
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Old 08-05-2011, 03:51 PM
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Forgot to post this...this morning we did the "Changing of the Guard" It worked perfectly!! Thanks NAN for that and how to do it correctly!!

I think mom might of read about this some where...I told her i didn't think of her as the type of parent that allows her son to walk all over her. She said oh no...I understand...she knows this has to do with her son. He did awesome today at drop off though..I we will have to work on pick up as she does therapy for my daugher so we trade daycare services for my daughters care 2 a week and that gets a little hard. Not as bad as drop off though. Just wanted to update.
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